Capricorn and Scorpio placements.. distant ?

Is it normal for a person with all personal planets in Capricorn and Scorpio to remain distant most of the time? Or is it something I should take personally?

during the first two years he was much involved with me he used to initiate contact all the time. But now As he knows that I love him too and will never leave him no matter what, he has become very distant most of time. He does not initiate conversation that often. So, Is that a normal behavior ?

His Personal planets placement :
Sun : Capricorn
Moon: Scorpio
Mercury: Capricorn
Venus: Capricorn
Mars: Scorpio

By distant I meant that he does not initiate contact (text or calls) that often. And when we talk he is quite serious most of the time. Simply answering my questions to the point i.e. in just 2 to 3 words. Is it normal behavior when you are sure that you have won the other person?an
When I confront him he says its nothing. But when I throw tantrums on him for such behavior he start behaving like he used to, he start initiating contact but just for a day or two lol.

No we do not live together
We usually see each other only once in a month

Yeah but sometimes I feel that its his more real side. That cheerful sideee was just a mask which he wore for two years. Now that he know that I am his no matter what so he has become relaxed. What do you think?

Posted by evalani290
@Anna1:

Why do you see each other only once in a month?

We both are busy with our jobs and hardly get time to meet each other. But we talk over texts daily

Posted by evalani290
I understand,you both been this busy from the beginning?

When was the last time you heard his voice on the phone and who initiated the call?

Yes, wo both were this busy from the very beginning of our relationship but still he used to take out time for me but now he seems very much relaxed about our relationship.

As far as call is concerned I was the one to initiate calls every now and then during the last couple of months but as he didn't seemed interested in initiating so I also stoped. He only calls me when there is some issue that cannot be solved on texts. Last week we had a fight over something and to solve that issue he called So I heard his voice last saturday.

I am being very patient with him this year because I don't want fights to ruin our relationship. I wasn't this much patient but spending two years with him has made me much more patient then before as he himself has a lot of patience. But sometimes my aries sun and mercury becomes so much impatient that I begin to throw tantrums on him for such behavior or whatever issue is their. After that I get my guy back for a day or two he changes altogether he becomes much more caring and thoughtful he reassures me of his feelings towards me. When he feels that my wrath has cooled down he again become distant until our next fight 😄

Posted by anna1

Posted by evalani290
@Anna1:

Why do you see each other only once in a month?

We both are busy with our jobs and hardly get time to meet each other. But we talk over texts daily

click to expand

Out if sight, out of mind?

Might be the case.

I dunno about all this. You say he knows you love him. Has he ever told you he loves you?

If a cap loves someone, there's NO WAY they would settle for such little communication. Seeing each other once a month wouldn't fly with me. Caps make things happen and will make effort for people they love regardless how busy they are.

Maybe you should have a heart to heart talk with him. Don't get upset, don't be aggressive, don't place blame and don't throw a tantrum. Stay calm and explain to him how you're feeling. Ask him to see things from your perspective. Appeal to his logic.

Posted by truecap
I dunno about all this. You say he knows you love him. Has he ever told you he loves you?

If a cap loves someone, there's NO WAY they would settle for such little communication. Seeing each other once a month wouldn't fly with me. Caps make things happen and will make effort for people they love regardless how busy they are.

He tells me almost daily that he loves me. Just a distant behavior is bothering me because he wasn't like that in the beginning of our relationship maybe at that time he was unsure of my feelings for him that's why he was trying so hard to get me? whenever we have a fight i can see that he wants me and that he cannot live without me because during our fight sometimes he suddenly changes so much leaving all his ego and literally begging. he reassures me of his feelings every now and then. seeing each other once a month is a compulsion. he is also doing a job and his boss doesn't allow him to take leaves from job. Its a full day job from 9 Am to 8 Pm after that he go to gym so he has a very busy schedule so I don't blame him for that. Its just his distant behavior that's bothering me.

Posted by truecap
Maybe you should have a heart to heart talk with him. Don't get upset, don't be aggressive, don't place blame and don't throw a tantrum. Stay calm and explain to him how you're feeling. Ask him to see things from your perspective. Appeal to his logic.

I tried to talk many times about this issue but he refused to consider it as an issue. He always say that there's nothing like that. He never admits even a slightest change in his behavior.

Posted by anna1

Posted by truecap
Maybe you should have a heart to heart talk with him. Don't get upset, don't be aggressive, don't place blame and don't throw a tantrum. Stay calm and explain to him how you're feeling. Ask him to see things from your perspective. Appeal to his logic.

I tried to talk many times about this issue but he refused to consider it as an issue. He always say that there's nothing like that. He never admits even a slightest change in his behavior.

click to expand

See, that's not good news. I suppose his reaction depends on how it's approached, but he should be able to see himself in your shoes if the roles were reversed and recognize how he'd feel. Then, he should make some sort of effort.

Well, all in all, you have to be true to yourself. If you're willing to accept this behavior or if you're not willing to accept it. Do what is best for you. You know what you can live with and what you can't. So, just ask yourself is he doing enough? Are you happy with the status quo? Do you want more? What do you deserve? Is he worth it? Will it get better? Is this the life you want? Does the time you do spend together make up for the time you don't? All those kinds of questions. If you're okay with this, then great! If you're not, then you'll have to take some action. Only you can make that decision.

I have all of the above, except I have Mars in Sag.

I can be kind of closed off and distant.

But if I'm in a relationship I check in very frequently.

It could be a guy thing though. I feel like a lot of the men need space. My husband is a scorp, moon in cap, and he needs his space for sure.

Posted by evalani290
If you pay attention to the details of your relationship like you said,from 2 years ago you will see that he's changing you,in better and you'll learn a lot from him,that's the impact a man should have on a woman in the first place.
Capricorns have that ability,with the right person beside them and in time they will become also more open so really,it's up to you if you want to discover this man,you'll need time to experience different situations with him.
Don't focus so much on your impulses,focus on you through his eyes and you'll never look at the world the same again.
Remember this every time you get in that feisty mood,look at the bigger picture through his eyes,you'll tend to calm down.

Yes he has changed me a lot into a better person. In the beginning of our relationship I wasn't patient at all I used to get angry over petty things we had many ups and downs due to this behavior of mine but now after two years I can say that I have changed a lot because I don't want anymore fights in our relationships. during the first one and a half year he compromised a lot and I really appreciate the stability he showed. I think now its my time to compromise may be for life. I tend to focus on details in a relationship rather than the bigger picture. I am still quite obsessed by him. But now he stays aloof most of the time 😢 but I am giving him the space he needs In hope for the best 🙂

Posted by truecap
Well, all in all, you have to be true to yourself. If you're willing to accept this behavior or if you're not willing to accept it. Do what is best for you. You know what you can live with and what you can't. So, just ask yourself is he doing enough? Are you happy with the status quo? Do you want more? What do you deserve? Is he worth it? Will it get better? Is this the life you want? Does the time you do spend together make up for the time you don't? All those kinds of questions. If you're okay with this, then great! If you're not, then you'll have to take some action. Only you can make that decision.

I feel that he his worth it. Its just a space thing But as I said maybe its his normal behavior because he isn't trying that hard now. He is serious to have a long term relationship with me, we are planning to get married He even arranged our parents meeting for the same purpose. I don't doubt his intentions he is offering me the security and stability I crave, He is responsible, Practical, As Patient as job. He has many qualities but yes no one is perfect So I don't mind even if its his normal trait.

Posted by anna1
Is it normal for a person with all personal planets in Capricorn and Scorpio to remain distant most of the time? Or is it something I should take personally?

during the first two years he was much involved with me he used to initiate contact all the time. But now As he knows that I love him too and will never leave him no matter what, he has become very distant most of time. He does not initiate conversation that often. So, Is that a normal behavior ?

His Personal planets placement :
Sun : Capricorn
Moon: Scorpio
Mercury: Capricorn
Venus: Capricorn
Mars: Scorpio

My lady has those placements, with the exception of Moon in Cancer and Venus in Aqua.

Let him be and trust what he is saying. It takes a lot of patience with a Cap, but it is rewarding. Cherish the time you two spend with each other, live in that moment. Alone time is necessary for Caps, trust me, I know first hand with my Venus in Scorpio, it took a lot for me to get used to that. It takes a lot of work and honest communication with one another, but what it boils down to is trust.

Good luck.

Posted by truecap

Posted by anna1
I tried to talk many times about this issue but he refused to consider it as an issue. He always say that there's nothing like that. He never admits even a slightest change in his behavior.

See, that's not good news. I suppose his reaction depends on how it's approached, but he should be able to see himself in your shoes if the roles were reversed and recognize how he'd feel. Then, he should make some sort of effort.

Yup. You are 50% in this relationship and if you think this is an issue, he needs to consider it an issue too, imo. If you are going to make this relationship work, you have got to be able to deal with things like these and if he chooses to just wipe it under the rug, saying it's okay, then I wonder if he is taking this seriously enough.

Posted by truecap
Well, all in all, you have to be true to yourself. If you're willing to accept this behavior or if you're not willing to accept it. Do what is best for you. You know what you can live with and what you can't. So, just ask yourself is he doing enough? Are you happy with the status quo? Do you want more? What do you deserve? Is he worth it? Will it get better? Is this the life you want? Does the time you do spend together make up for the time you don't? All those kinds of questions. If you're okay with this, then great! If you're not, then you'll have to take some action. Only you can make that decision.

click to expand

^^^I agree totally with this.

To answer your question if this is common, I'd say yes and no. Yes, the characteristics are there, imo, but putting that little effort in it doesn't seem like something I see very often in either caps or scorps. Everyone gets a little comfortable at times, but especially since you manage to see each other only once a month it doesn't sound like something I would expect. One more thing: So you are going from seeing each other once a month for two years(24 meetings in person) to getting married? Not judging - you do whatever works for you, just asking if I understood this correctly.

I just cannot see a Cap male with ANY relevant placements conducting what is essentially a relationship purely (85-90% ?) via text for over two years!? without really taking steps to move things closer or further...
It sounds very unusual to me personally, I mean really uncharacteristic- and ya the Cap I'm seeing is Scorp Moon/ Aqua Venus so, there is space required there too and even then it's like -'I need space but I need you inside the space that I need'- (paraphrasing my Cap)

Posted by HappyCapper

To answer your question if this is common, I'd say yes and no. Yes, the characteristics are there, imo, but putting that little effort in it doesn't seem like something I see very often in either caps or scorps. Everyone gets a little comfortable at times, but especially since you manage to see each other only once a month it doesn't sound like something I would expect. One more thing: So you are going from seeing each other once a month for two years(24 meetings in person) to getting married? Not judging - you do whatever works for you, just asking if I understood this correctly.

Well yes you understood this correctly we had even less than 24 meetings there are few reasons for that:
1. We both are busy working. We hardly get a day off from our jobs.
2. The second and the main reason is our cultural and religious restrictions, which do not allow a girl and a guy to meet before marriage. Still whenever he gets a day off he asks me to meet but there is mostly a no on my part as I don't want to deceive my parents by telling them some kind of lie every time.

Posted by wagtail
I just cannot see a Cap male with ANY relevant placements conducting what is essentially a relationship purely (85-90% ?) via text for over two years!? without really taking steps to move things closer or further...
It sounds very unusual to me personally, I mean really uncharacteristic- and ya the Cap I'm seeing is Scorp Moon/ Aqua Venus so, there is space required there too and even then it's like -'I need space but I need you inside the space that I need'- (paraphrasing my Cap)

Wagtail I mentioned the reasons above.
"without really taking steps to move things closer or further..." as far as this statement is concerned I met his parents and he met mine, he has also arranged a few meeting where his parents met mine. Which is a big thing in our culture and shows that he is really serious about our relationship. we have planned each and every detail of our future.

Thank you everyone for your opinions and suggestions. Their aren't any big issues in our relationship. Of course you all will agree that religion and cultures have a great impact on the relationships, So less or no meetings before marriage is normal in our culture. The only thing was his aloofness which I can understand he stays busy working the whole day. He is mostly affection late at night its the time when I get my lovey dovey guy back 🙂

affectionate*

Posted by anna1

Posted by HappyCapper

To answer your question if this is common, I'd say yes and no. Yes, the characteristics are there, imo, but putting that little effort in it doesn't seem like something I see very often in either caps or scorps. Everyone gets a little comfortable at times, but especially since you manage to see each other only once a month it doesn't sound like something I would expect. One more thing: So you are going from seeing each other once a month for two years(24 meetings in person) to getting married? Not judging - you do whatever works for you, just asking if I understood this correctly.

Well yes you understood this correctly we had even less than 24 meetings there are few reasons for that:
1. We both are busy working. We hardly get a day off from our jobs.
2. The second and the main reason is our cultural and religious restrictions, which do not allow a girl and a guy to meet before marriage. Still whenever he gets a day off he asks me to meet but there is mostly a no on my part as I don't want to deceive my parents by telling them some kind of lie every time.

click to expand

1. I'm sorry, but that sounds a bit like an excuse to me. At my worst, I had one full time job where I worked over time almost every day of work, plus two part time jobs(8 hours a week each)and I still managed to see my bf at least twice a week. If you really want to, you make it work. Tbh, I think it boils down to the second point.

2. Which I get. Whatever works for you works for you, so do it! I'm not sure if I could do it, so I must admit to being curious as to how that would work, but I totally respect it. May I ask one thing, though - again, not because I don't respect it, but because I'm curious. I'm wondering about your parent's involvement. You are 25. Shouldn't you be able to do what you want to do without lying. Shouldn't it be about what works for you ...not your parents'? It's your life - you are different people and what works for them doesn't necessarily work for you. I'm guessing a cultural thing, maybe? But aren't you a grown-up in all cultures at 25? Just curious and no disrespect.

Posted by HappyCapper

I'm wondering about your parent's involvement. You are 25. Shouldn't you be able to do what you want to do without lying. Shouldn't it be about what works for you ...not your parents'? It's your life - you are different people and what works for them doesn't necessarily work for you. I'm guessing a cultural thing, maybe? But aren't you a grown-up in all cultures at 25? Just curious and no disrespect.

Sadly, No! Girls in our culture aren't allowed to choose their life partner themselves. Regardless of their age it is deemed that parents know what's best and what's not. Moreover if a girl dares to choose her life partner herself people raise questions on her character. Its our culture not religion. Religion allows a grown-up girl to choose her guy but not our culture 😢

Posted by evalani290

Posted by anna1

Posted by HappyCapper

I'm wondering about your parent's involvement. You are 25. Shouldn't you be able to do what you want to do without lying. Shouldn't it be about what works for you ...not your parents'? It's your life - you are different people and what works for them doesn't necessarily work for you. I'm guessing a cultural thing, maybe? But aren't you a grown-up in all cultures at 25? Just curious and no disrespect.

Sadly, No! Girls in our culture aren't allowed to choose their life partner themselves. Regardless of their age it is deemed that parents know what's best and what's not. Moreover if a girl dares to choose her life partner herself people raise questions on her character. Its our culture not religion. Religion allows a grown-up girl to choose her guy but not our culture 😢

That sounds romantically dramatic,it's a kind of Romeo and Juliet story. Just please,don't dagger yourself.
You can both make this work with patience and determination,there's nothing no one can do if you really want to be together.
Also,from what you're saying this man loves you. Maybe he has his own issues at work,his thoughts to think about,his frustrations and expectations and he doesn't want to make you a part of that because that would mean burden you in his logic so he stays quiet,that's something to admire,it takes a lot of strength Anna.
Don't push him away and don't make a problem where there's none.
Try to fuel this relationship when he's like that,you have his back,he'll have yours when the time will come.
It won't be always peaches but then again,when it is?
I like the way you're talking about him also,that's a beautiful thing,it shows your loyalty to him even if he's not around to hear you.

Keep going and don't give up,you got something good!
Best of luck!

click to expand

Thankyou for your helpful suggesstions evalani 🙂

Thank you for sharing, Anna! 🙂

Let's go back to the original question, now that we know a little bit more.

Posted by anna1
Is it normal for a person with all personal planets in Capricorn and Scorpio to remain distant most of the time? Or is it something I should take personally?

during the first two years he was much involved with me he used to initiate contact all the time. But now As he knows that I love him too and will never leave him no matter what, he has become very distant most of time. He does not initiate conversation that often. So, Is that a normal behavior?

If I understand this correctly, you are going to get married some day. But that's not where life ends. When you get married and start to live together, there are inevitably going to pop up issues immediately and on the way and you need to learn ways to handle them. As it looks now, one solves issues by saying everything is allright and the other solves them by throwing tantrums. Not gonna work. It's all well to sweep things under the rug when you hardly see each other, but try doing that in a marriage...

This is not your ordinary couple - you have to make it work, and the only way you are going to be able to do that, imo, is by learning to communicate and to solve issues together. I don't think you are overreacting. "he has become very distant most of time. He does not initiate conversation that often." and "And when we talk he is quite serious most of the time. Simply answering my questions to the point i.e. in just 2 to 3 words." does not bode well, imo. I'd say something is really bothering him. May not be you and your relationship, but something. Talk to him.

But my main point is that you really need to acquire tools for dealing with issues together and do it now. As said, there are inevitably going to pop up new issues along the way and when they do, you really don't want to be dealing with old issues as well.

I'm confident that you are going to make this work if you just put in the effort - both of you. Super good luck and best wishes! 🙂

I have Cap sun/mercury and a Scorpio venus.

I guess Im a bit distant. Ive gotten complaints of not initiating texts and no phone calls. I guess since Ill think of someone so much I never feel far or away.