Feedback Pls—? Help me understand him...—

Hello everyone,
I want to share a story (my story), and would like some advice/or any info that could help me understand this Capricorn guy I have knon for almost 4 yrs now.
Thnx in advance!!!
Ok, so I got to know this Capricorn guy almost 4 yrs ago, and at first we started as friends, but he liked me instantly and didn't hide it at all.It was easy to see, and at the moment I was not looking for any relationship, even though I have to say that I felt good having him be all over me. So after 2-3 months of knowing him we ended up in a relationship.It was amazing, wonderful.He didn't say :"I love you", very often , but I could see it a mile away that he did love me. I on the other hand, didn't show my emotions towards him that much.Even though in a realtionship , I still played hard to get, just to show him that he was not everything in my world and that I was my own person.In a way I think that this attracted him more.After 5 months I called it off, and let me tell you , he was devestated. The reason I actually broke up, was that he was so into me, that I could not breath.HE wanted to be with me everywhere, everysecond if possible, and I just couldn't stand it after a while, even though I was deeply attracted to him(virgo-capp combo, go figure).But the realtionship was good.We understood each other in every level.But to clingy from his part.
After a week, we got back together, because we missed each other, and I thought maybe I can talk to him, about giving me space once in a while.Things were the same, he still was head over heels for me, and I wasn't that in love with him.(the right person but the wrong time )After 2 months I broke up with him again.The same reason being , that I felt like he was choking me with him emotions and always wanting to be there by my side, everywhere i went.He was so jelous of other guyes even though I never gave him reason to be.When Im with someone, I put an X over any other guy.He knew that, but I think ot was a insecurity prob.So anyways, after braking up for the 2nd time, we still reamined friends, but he still showes me he missed me, and loved being around. After 1 yr of not being together, I moved to another country, and its been 2 yrs that I haven't seen him.He cried when I left.It weird , but I have this tie to him, thats hard to explain.I want him in my life no matter what.

continue....
After 2-3 month after I moved away, he contacted me and told me how much he missed me and how it was not the same without me.He also stated that he can bear a long-dist realtionship as long as I wanted it too.He planed on coming over where I am in a yr or so. I wanted to , but weird things happened afer he got in touch with me, we got in a fight and I said smth not nice to him, and we didn't talk for almost 1 yr and 1/2.Than I went back to my country for during summer.I saw him there, and he was so bitter, so hurt.He was in another relationship, and ppl commented that it wasen't meaningful.I had missed him so much, but still in the 1 1/2 yrs I haddent contacted him just because i thought there wasnothing to say and he didn't want to hear form me again.But when i was there, I txt messaged him, and got bad responses, as:"I don't want to see ur face again, there is nothing u can ask from me now, and the last thing I never thought he would say:"goodbye" I was hurt, but i understood.That was it this summer.After comming back, i didn't even think ab it anymore. 2-3 months had passed after me being there and i get a e-mail sying that the way he acted was wrong and that if I wanted we can still be friends and keep in touch.I said ok, of course and we have kept in touch since than.(By the way he broke up with his girlfriend).I try to talk ab summer but its a lost battle.Better kill him than talk ab the way he acted towards me.I found that he is soo hurt, and doesn't believe in anyone anymore.He opens up to me, but not as he used to do .I told him i love him, but he feels hurt but that word since he now can't offer me anything being so far away(in a way i understand , but i still would love to hear the word).So anyways, I haven't talked to him in a week.He never used to disseapear on me, at times i wish he did, lol. I know i need to be pacient, but it seems so hard sometimes.I don't know why he came back after the mean way he acted during summer.I don't think its revange and I don't know if it is beacuse he still loves me after all this time.Sometimes I think like he is testing me over and over, if what i say i feel is real.Im a mess right now trying to understant.I havent tried to contact him, during the 7 days i haven't heard from him.Trying to give him space on whatever he is thinking or doing. I know it a lot to read, but thanks to those who got the patience to read my story to the end.I would appriciate any comment/advice/own story, anything.Thnx!

You are going to lose him forever if you don't stand up and proclaim your love for him. Hes going to eventually see no purpose in loving you if you remain silent. When he decides to move on, he will disappear without a trace. He will move on like you never existed and like he never knew you. I hope the day never comes when that happens to you.

I can bet this guy wants you to show him and not just tell him you love him. Actions speak louder than words. If your not ready for that than don't think of him any longer. Do things and act like you normally wouldnt to show your love to him. If he is the one than don't restrict yourself.

Capguy111, thnx for the answer.I wish I had the chance to show him I loved him with more than just words.The thing is , we are continents apart and it makes things so complicated.
One thing that makes everything harder, is that he won't open up too me like before.2 yrs ago he would say what he felt with no prob.Now he hides like no other.I can't read him.If I try to he gets mad, he just doesn't want to talk about emotions/feelings.But than again, it is him who came back to me even after such a long time.That should mean smth right— Ur a capp, u should know smth , how u act on diff situations.Or let me ask u, do u hide feelings from someone u moght even love just because ur afraid that she might break ur heart again—

Omg, I felt like I wrote that... It is soooo difficult to get back what you once had after this happens. Still trying... and it's been about 2 yrs. I look forward to what CapGuy111 may have to say still....

It seems like you should be looking at yourself at the problems instead of mr cap. Mr cap has been declaring his love for you and it has gotten him nowhere. I believe he will eventually call it quits but not without a fight. I think youre scared to surrender yourself to him and its killing him by you doing this. Tell him everything you are scared to tell him and I promise you two will be better off. These are things ive learned from dating my ex virgo gal.

Don't tell me he will call it quits. Its the last thing I want to hear CG111. 😢
And I have told him how I feel, no gloves.It seems like he can't hear it.Maybe because he feels not in control.Like he can do nothing since he is sooo far away.Its weird now that I open up, he just slams the door and is afraid to show any emotions.I am not sure if he still has feelings for me , because he doesn't open up.Its like a wall, hard to go through.But than why did he come back. If he didn't feel/want anything he didn't have to come back in my life.

You have to be unpredictable and hit him with a KO punch. He has to know he is special. You should make a surprise visit out of the blue. You have to give up your pride and go all out. Anything less and you don't deserve him. We only really show ourselves when we are vulnerable. I only showed my EX that i loved her when she had the upper hand.

hmmmmm... I with figure out smth.I will def try. When you say u show your real self when you are vulnerable, what do u entitle by that exactly?? 🙂

i wont show myself completely to anyone until i might be losing them and then i will leave
the closet open for them to see inside and the other party might be scared to see someone be so open about everything about themselves. There is nothing worse to a cap male than losing control. We will do everything to gain control again even to lose a part of ourselves.

Ah... this is so interesting... I have so encountered this wall~ and he was so smitten and open at the start. do you know his other placements- venus and moon? mine has pisces venus which was why the clinginess I think and open emotions which scared and freaked me out~ thought he was playing. Why do you mean by "upper hand", CG??

the upper hand was that she found a new man and there goes the control out the window so i
begged like a baby. ROFL

So CG111 , ur saying I should be a no show so he will feel like he is loosing me and that way he will make an effort and show his real feelings.—hmm..

Him moon is in Scorpio and his venus in Aquarius... What does this really mean— How does it effect him—

LOL,LOL,rofl.......ME TOO, IM A MOON IN SCORPIO AND VENUS IN AQUARIUS..... HOLY ****

R U A MOON IS GEMINI, BTW?

hahahaha GREAT , the right guy to tell me everything I know. lol. Its a small and weird world

I have a moon on Cancer not Gem

DARN, at least you will get all the answers....lol

hahhaha, why darn— And yes , I will try to get all the answers.lol 🙂

you will get him back with my help...LOL (but seriously)

hahahha, I have faith in you totally, no doubt.lol
If you screw up, you will be in trouble ,LOL, jokeing 🙂

lets keep in contact through PM....cant let the world know about the cap/scorp/aqua secrets of live everyday

hahah, think so—

whatever is more comfortable....you know all those crazies on the net....lol

we're part of the net, but we're not crazies right?? hahah lol, funny 🙂
But yeahh, PM, sure.

When is ur b-day— (if I can ask)🙂

check your inbox

Hey!! This was some good insight from a cap. guy... Come back! 🙂 What do you do to gain control, CG? Or what don't you do so as not to LOSE control?

Very good insight from a Cap Guy ... Thank goodness for you.

Hey CapGuy - how do you get through the wall these men put up ?

the only way to get through our wall is to geniune and not playing games with our head. Always tell the truth to us even if it the worst news in the world. We know that the truth
is unchanging and will never let you down. We like to be in control of our lives so knowing the truth puts us at ease. Breaking the wall is hard so you must hit it as hard as possible with the biggest weapon you have, so you must be as blunt as possible. We need assertiveness in a partner because we have low self esteem sometimes and we need to be put back on track.

CapGuy... what is with "the silence" and how should that be interpreted?? For example, if a girl has expressed romantic interest and wanting a relationship w/ you, and you don't tell her "no..." or reject her, yet never directly "lay your own cards down" though?

if i was silent to a girl that was interested, it would probably mean that im not crazy about her but not totally turned off by her. It would probably lead it to a friends with benefits situation. If i was totally turned off by you id make up a nice excuse why i cant go out with you instead of saying no. We hate to have enemies unless absolutely necessary.

Makes sense, especially the "enemy" part... Only very confusing thing for me was that it started out much like Tranquilvirgo's story, with him chasing and smothering me and me keeping him "at arms length"; and then when I finally had some time to come around to the idea and revealed my interest, he kept his distance.

Ah...my deal is all a big mess and pretty much done now. 😢 But your advice is very very good for many. 🙂

CapGuy - You're advice is awesome :-)

CG111- PPL love ur advice.lol. U really know Cappys (well since ur one urself) 🙂THNX again

Ldybg377, i dont know if he is really interested in you or not, but I'd be cautious about him using you as a rebound girl. He might be scared if he really likes you or your just a nice person to make him forget the past. I wouldnt want to get anyones hopes up if my heart was still with another girl. He wont get his heart broken again so soon so you might
be waiting a long time for him to show you his true feelings. If you open up more to him and dont pressure him to do the same he will eventually come around. If he doesnt respond to your openness than you have to be more direct to force it out of him.

Hey CapGuy ... Got another question for you.

The Cap Guy that I've been talking to has recently invited me to his football game where his kids and family will be. I've been trying to read him for the past 6 months and sometimes I think I understand him and sometimes I think I don't. But since CapGuys are normally reserved do you think that this is a significant step?? He's very protective over his children and this is going to be the first time I could potentially meet them.

Why can't these men be easy to read?

The reason i think this is significant is because you aren't sure what to make of it. When you start to question if you know the real us is when you start to see the real us. How much you see of the real him is the question. It only gets better from here. He definitely likes you alot to take this step. Always look at our actions and not our words.

Thanks GG111 I hope you are right and that things only get better from here. I'll keep you posted on what happens at the game. I'm so nervous just because I don't know how he's going to act towards me when all his family is there. I'm just gonna go with no expectations - maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised.