Feeling Wronged and Unjustified....

Sometimes I think I understand the cappy lady then at times I'm left wondering what happened and clueless to what's going on up in her heart/head.

Cappy lady was upset over something I did (which I did not even know what and why), she kind of went distanced on me, I thought she needed her space, so I let her be and did not probed. Its been more than a week and she is still sounding cold and aloof with monosyllabic answers.

As usual, the Aries me was occupied with my own stuffs and did not actually sensed that she was upset over something. Not sure if it was something I said or done.

If you have already gotten over it (about the thing that upset her) and moved on, why not contact me and carry on as per the way we were communicating?

So what am I suppose to do when you hold grudges? Any ideas to appease the cappy lady?

IF SHE DOESN'T COME AROUND IN 5 TO 10 YEARS MOVE ON.

^ What he said times 7.

Thanks! She's worth it even if its a lifetime.

But you are not answering the question.

Posted by james tate
IF SHE DOESN'T COME AROUND IN 5 TO 10 YEARS MOVE ON.

adorably true!...lol

Talked over it with the lady and figured out she is needing her personal space. We probably spent "too much" time together for friends not in a relationship. I am just gonna let her come round to it and back when she wants to.

Posted by morningsb
You probably insulted her by calling her a nerd, dork or some other 4 letter word you thought she wouldn't have been insulted with because according to you it described her to a T. My cold fronts with fire signs have always involved with being insulted or what seemed like you were trying to be insulting. If you aren't her long lost friend she probably doesn't know if you were insulting her or pulling her leg.

Foot in mouth is a fire sign thing. Happens more often when you talk to caps.

You are right about this! I am very straightforward but around her I do watch it but some times there are just that moments of folly!

Posted by cheekyfaerie
If you did something wrong or that she perceived as wrong, by all means act accordingly. Then play it by ear. She's gonna hafta be the one to come around and there are quite a few factors that'll dictate to her when that should be. The length of time the situation was allowed to fester, being the primary one.

That's my 2p anyway.

Thanks cheekyfaerie for sharing your thoughts. I realised that too after my impatient nature REAR its evil face! It hasnt shown its face for a long time. I should have let her come round by herself on her terms.

Posted by thxbutnothx
There can be only one impatient person in a relationship. That's why I could never date fire signs.

I do very much take pride in myself for being very patient and I get complimented by my friends for that for tolerating their shits/troubles/whatever you wanna call it.

Posted by thxbutnothx

Posted by spritescream
So what am I suppose to do when you hold grudges? Any ideas to appease the cappy lady?

"Don't be mad ok even though I have no idea what I did/say k? Let's go do something you enjoy 🙂"

If you cannot do this, then move on.

click to expand

I do very much like this! Life's too short to waste time dwelling and brooding on the unknown and past.

Posted by thxbutnothx
You do sound like a cool and sweet guy 🙂. I'm sory if I made you feel bad.

Not at all! In fact I do very much appreciate your comments and thoughts. No matter how harsh! I love to hear the truth than all the sweet-coated stuffs that people want to hear or getting affirmations for ideas/thoughts they already formed on their own and just want some support ---> im not this kind of person.

You assumed she needed her own space...? Or did she tell you that she needed her own space...?

When I'm mad...my ego will not let me forgive you, until you own up to what you did wrong. And sometimes I expect someone I'm close to to knpw when they've hurt me or something...you two sound close. One thing I forget is that people are not mind readers. So go up tp her, ask her to let you know what you did wrong because how are you gonna be sorry for something that you have no idea was wrong in the first place?

Encourage her to open up...she is probably brooding over what you did, and is slowly coming up with a revenge plan.lol im kidding...........but yeah, talk to her. Space for a cap is not always the best thing...becasue now she is putting up some distance in order to detach herself so it doesn't hurt the next time you hurt her...


or maybe she just wants space....? :-/

Posted by leilaxxlovez
You assumed she needed her own space...? Or did she tell you that she needed her own space...?

We talked about it and it all boils down to me getting emo (which was a result of her indecisiveness about needing her own space and not making it clear, Im not a mind reader) so yes, she needed her space and also be able to say NO to me when I want to meet her. She did asked me what do I want out of this? Because what we have right now is not like how friends should behave and we are not in a relationship (seriously do we really need to officiate it?).
I did not answer her question on what I want out of this whole thing.

Encourage her to open up...she is probably brooding over what you did, and is slowly coming up with a revenge plan.lol im kidding...........but yeah, talk to her. Space for a cap is not always the best thing...becasue now she is putting up some distance in order to detach herself so it doesn't hurt the next time you hurt her...


or maybe she just wants space....? :-/

click to expand

I think you are right, I did somehow hurt her through my words and she have now dissmissed me as the same as the others who viewed her. She thought I was special and did not judge her not until 2 weeks back I asked her some questions (which was just some general questions which i asked girls and she concluded that I am just the same like everyone esle now). She also blurted out that she is not that type of needy/clingy person which to me all the more feels that she really is one. I did not try to explain myself as I believe that time will prove everything. However this episode have made me weary of being open with her. It is really difficult for me to open up to someone, I usually a very private person.

I am just going to 'move on' and not get so obssessed over these sort of emo feelings anymore.

Posted by BlazingGoat
Well, if you find it hard to open up I don't know what advice to give because one of those universals I believe in (and there are very few) is that there MUST be open and clear communication in a a relationship. No relationship takes care of itself so you must always "work" on a relationship for lack of better wording before my morning coffee. I don't assume that hub can read my mind, in fact I know he can't and I speak up loud and clearly when I'm unhappy and no; It can't wait until I've cooled down! This may be unpleasant but at least no one's seething and simmering for a long time and conflicts have vastly decreased over the years because of this communication and our attitude towards our marriage.

" When I'm mad...my ego will not let me forgive you, until you own up to what you did wrong. And sometimes I expect someone I'm close to to knpw when they've hurt me or something...you two sound close. One thing I forget is that people are not mind readers". Sounds a lot like me which is why I force myself to do something I find very uncomfortable and set my privacy aside and TALK as in two way communication.

I was able to find out all these because I made her open up to me despite her not wanting to. She wanted to do it some other day and did not wish to talk about it because she have already cooled down and GOTTEN over it and made her own conclusions. You are right about OPEN and clear communication and just as I was able to have it with her, it crumbled when I hurt her through my words. I said I was disappointed to all the good open communication we used to have.

Posted by BlazingGoat
Sorry sprites, had my coffee, read through everything again. I'm laughing, not at you but because you just reminded me of a few innocently intended questions recently that just made me blow my top off, knee jerk and do some highly dramatic and completely out of proportion stuff. Btw. I don't know how you feel about cusp signs but I'm either a SagiCap or early Cap, either way, it's the same to me. I may not respond to situations the way residents of Capricorn aprox. 24th Dec/1-20 Jan. do.

I'm not sure about cusp signs but her's on 15 Jan. What out of proportion stuff did you do to him? And I bet he must have been clueless but then again, I am sure he know you too well to know how to handle that situation.

Posted by morningsb
You probably insulted her by calling her a nerd, dork or some other 4 letter word you thought she wouldn't have been insulted with because according to you it described her to a T. My cold fronts with fire signs have always involved with being insulted or what seemed like you were trying to be insulting. If you aren't her long lost friend she probably doesn't know if you were insulting her or pulling her leg.

Foot in mouth is a fire sign thing. Happens more often when you talk to caps.

You hit it right on spot! I indeed "insulted" her through my words when I asked her some questions which she deemed it as me digging into her past as a cheater. I still feel wrong and unjustified anyway because it is totally irrelevant!

Does anyone how to interpret these readings of the cap lady?

planet sign degree motion
Sun Capricorn 24??20'53 in house 11 direct
Moon Leo 14??03'22 in house 5 direct
Mercury Capricorn 9??03'01 in house 10 direct
Venus Sagittarius 7??32'09 in house 9 direct
Mars Capricorn 25??38'06 in house 11 direct
Jupiter Leo 5??18'10 in house 5 retrograde
Saturn Virgo 13??31'43 in house 6 retrograde
Uranus Scorpio 20??16'07 end of house 8 direct
Neptune Sagittarius 19??18'50 end of house 9 direct
Pluto Libra 19??12'41 end of house 7 direct
True Node Virgo 18??41'23 in house 7 retrograde