Why am I selfdestrutive

Why do I drink and whore like there is no tomorrow? Why don't I give a dam about anything? Why don't I beleave in something? I get this way when I drink sometimes, I try to figger it all out but I get no answer. Growing up I trid to beleave in a God everyone said pray and and you will feel the power of God in you I have never felt anything, nota I thought for awhile I was the only man with no soul. Maybe I am. I always come here and read or something when I am realy drunk. So who gives a big rats ass anyway.

JT,
just the fact that you come here means that you do give a damn, and there's something that you're not getting that's making you very angry. i think what one should say to oneself is "i am where i'm meant to be" and try to find/see the positive things that are occuring in one's life. even though our situations are not to our liking, there usually is something right about it. just the fact that your presence here is a blessing and source of happiness to others is one good reason to know you're valued and loved. it just takes a twist in one's thinking sometimes to turn it all around. no one can do that for us but ourselves. you can do it too. we must accept, if you do that, we might loose the cookiemonster of a guy we've come to love, but we might really like the happy JT just as much, maybe more. you're a capricorn. it's time to climb that mountain , and be the true "goat" you're meant to be. you won't fall. :-)

You are right, pato...JT will NOT fall as we all are here to push him up that mountain. You are not an "old goat" either, JT so continue climbing that mountain and reach your desired heights...once there, you will be able to look down and see where you came from. Makes the climb so worth it.

Pato~ what awesome advice you have shared, thanks. I have a male Cappy friend who is not a happy camper. I have known him for many years. He is still very bitter from his wife divorcing him over 15 yrs. ago even though it was not a good marriage at all. His next relationship after that was very disfunctional and he held onto this one for 10 yrs. before getting out (not sure if he really--totally is yet). He constantly has a sty in his eye and they get very bad..so bad he cannot see out of his eye. In looking to why we have certain illness they can tell a lot of where we are emotionally. I looked sty up....it said that he is looking at the world in an angry way. And yes, he is. He talks about that all the time. His daughter moved out and I am sure this is a huge bother to him. She couldn't take not having freedom to be herself. It is so hard for me to see him going through all of this and I know there is nothing I can do (except send silent blessings his way). He must change when HE is ready to change. And as you say, Pato..."it just takes a twist in one's thinking sometimes to turn it all around."

thanks freebird...being a cap myself, i know all the pains that come with it. not that i've worked the whole thing out either. i do know that sometimes disease comes from dis -ease. lacking peace. if you can try to steer your friend in the direction of looking at the good points in his life, that might help. not looking back at the pain, for a moment, just be in the moment, and also look towards the future, not with a fear, but with a belief that it could and just might be be wonderful.

and JT, even if you find some happiness, i don't think you'll ever loose that razor sharp wit you have. you're the best.

calling all troops! please go to the taurus board. this woman (girl) needs help fast.

Yes please go and help her she needs it bad. I think I can make it on my own, That bit of self pity was brought on by not enough drink.

jt..maybe you just have some addiction issues. we're all addicted to something. drink and babes are just your thing. you must be the one to decide if you want to confront those issues or not. just know we are here for you.

Dear Pato

What kind of a name is that it can not be short for potato. Where I come from a freebird is an easy woman who is always willing to jump in the sack. Where do you people get these names from? I really would like to know . I may change my name for the site to scotch. I am not making fun of anyone there must be a reason behind this please tell me.

patty o'neil

Hi JT!!!

Well Mr. JT---you must have fun with "freebirds" where you are....lucky YOU! Hmmm..that is not why I chose the name..never really thought of that. The bird represents the "spirit" and I am "free" from a captive marriage...(I have been free now for 6 yrs!!!!) Hence, Freebird.

Now perhaps I should work on becomming easy and learn how to jump sacks 😉

Dear pato I called you patato somewhere else nothing personal, sorry about that. I take it your from Erin?

pennsylvania, usa

as far as potato goes, no worries. i've had many nicknames all my life....twink, deer, peaches, boova, jabobi. potato is kinda cute. ok, maybe sweet potato.

jabobi I have to know how and why?

I was going to comfort you James, but I think you're feeling much better now.

You could be "Scotch_Tate", which is almost "Scotch_Tape", which would be really weird. Do you have scotch tape over there where you are, or is that just an American thing? You know, the disappearing tape. lol.

This is the weirdest post I've ever written.

lol...scotch_tate.
anyway.the ja-bob-bee story:..it all started in high school when my girlfriend and i used to imbibe in a bit of herb. we would go to a place in our minds called ja-ba-ba-land. well, told the story to my current guy pal, and he has since called me ja-bob-bee. it has now changed meanings somewhat, in that he uses it to describe little things (me) and like little miniture things like, lets say a small bottle of maple syrup. it would be a ja-bob-bee bottle.
we could call you 3M for short...(it's american tape):-)

we are premative but we have scotch tape. we know three m or minnasota mining or what ever.

i don't think you're (england is) primative. i just wasn't sure what brand you use. i gather you don't think it's funny.
well...i could've called you tater.

wait..jt, are you from england or ireland?

Llandrindod Wells Wales, most recent of Canterbury Kent 24 Whitstable Road ct2 8dq. Now in the states for a bit in St Louis Mo to visit Old Jake.

why, are you really james bond?....mr. steed? why do those addresses sound so darn sexy to americans? like you really drive some kind of gull wing something or other, and always wear a tie and jacket, with a sterling silver flask of scotch nestled in the inside pocket.

Far from it old chap. I drive a saab, and a 1950 Railly. My dress is levies and a shirt.

well that's the first time i've been called an old chap

or you and old chap, or a young lass? the name could be either.

lass...very young at heart...middle age....healthy.

I shouldn't live past 40 so I guess I am old

i think we all create our own futures. we can be our worst ememies or our best friends. i do believe it is the human condition, though, that we eventually destroy everything. ourselves and the worlds in which we live. that sounds so pessimistic, but look at the world. it's only humans that are destroying it and the human race in general.
so eat, drink and be merry, as the bible says...for tomorrow...well, you know.

I am not big on the bible but I do not remember eat drink and make mary. I do like the begotten part there has to be a lot of treetrunking going on to do all that begotten.

guess there wasn't much else to do. cruise the market? hang out at the collisium, watch a few christians get eaten? that would be a great date, huh? primal.

I could be the broadcaster welcome friends to this weeks events. You remember last weeks score lions 37 christians nil. Oh well back to the real world.

We have David and posh you have an assortment of the same thing. I think they are the same people just they dress different on different days of the week.

I put posh and J low in the same group. not with your dick.

Have you ever heard her speak? she is lucky to put five words together to make a sentance. she is thick IQ maybe 50.you would be better off with a blow up doll.

To get some idea of how for down on the food chain she is go and read some of our rags.

By the By this has nothing to do with the turn coat bastard leaving england to play football in europe, Lets hope he stays there with the lady victoria, cookiemonster.

I have to agree with Tate on the whole Posh issue.

I always said you were my one lov.

lol

LOL LOL LOL

between parallax and JT, i'm soon gonna pee in my pants from lol.
:-)

Easy Pato we do not want you to get to worked up.

i'll take a good laugh over anything, luv. except a good romp, of course, which just might include a good laugh. :-)
it must be the capricorn moon.

Even a man who is good at heart and says his prays at night can become a wolf when the wolfgang blooms and the capricorn moon is full and bright.

i looked up what sign my venus was in (with the prompting of sweet-p, thanks) and found out my venus is in scorpio. yikes! better lock me up tonight. also found out my ex-scorp's venus is also in scorpio...that answers alot of questions. (as she picks up the phone to ring him):-)

my venus is in good working order, Its friday I may find a bird and see if my venus can match her venus.

Thanks for the advice I would not want to get involved in the crying game.