Do you leave them before they can leave you?

Any gems ever break up or think of breaking up with someone once your feelings start to get real and you are afraid they might hurt you? Like starting to overthink things and make stuff up in your head or being insecure and then sabotage your own relationships?

Not really.. but for your question I think you need to look at the Gem's moon and venus placements as opposed to them just being a Gemini Sun. I am Libra Moon and Cancer Venus. When my feelings start to get real I am cautious and move slow but I tend to initiate action and somewhat "dive in head first" without thinking much.

Posted by Gemoodeye1
Any gems ever break up or think of breaking up with someone once your feelings start to get real and you are afraid they might hurt you? Like starting to overthink things and make stuff up in your head or being insecure and then sabotage your own relationships?

So what's the idea...hurt them before they hurt you?

Posted by nats
Not really.. but for your question I think you need to look at the Gem's moon and venus placements as opposed to them just being a Gemini Sun. I am Libra Moon and Cancer Venus. When my feelings start to get real I am cautious and move slow but I tend to initiate action and somewhat "dive in head first" without thinking much.

Interesting. He is a libra sun, moon, Venus and Mars. I have Taurus moon...but gem venus

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by Gemoodeye1
Any gems ever break up or think of breaking up with someone once your feelings start to get real and you are afraid they might hurt you? Like starting to overthink things and make stuff up in your head or being insecure and then sabotage your own relationships?

So what's the idea...hurt them before they hurt you?

click to expand

Not really to hurt them, just to protect yourself and sometimes thinking you're doing what is in their best interest anyway. I know it's insecurity, just wondering if others do or think of doing the same thing.

Posted by littlenanobyte
Yep, I do.

I "overrationalize" why the relationship can't or shouldn't work. I tell myself I'd be better off, it's a waste of time, it's a distraction, most relationships don't last anyway, etc etc... Then I break it off.

My now fiancé didn't let me do that though 😆

I think us female gems need a strong man like that —

Yes! That's exactly what I'm talking about! I realize I have the same cycle and it's always around the 2-3 month mark. Some kind of panic and wanna run.. my libra sticks like glue though so he usually just calms me down when I'm being dumb...I'm trying to stop my overthinking for once but it's hard and any man has a breaking point if you push him away too much I think. Gems can be a little too good at convincing if we want to... even convincing ourselves of the irrational stories that we make up in our own heads.

Posted by Gemoodeye1

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by Gemoodeye1
Any gems ever break up or think of breaking up with someone once your feelings start to get real and you are afraid they might hurt you? Like starting to overthink things and make stuff up in your head or being insecure and then sabotage your own relationships?

So what's the idea...hurt them before they hurt you?

Not really to hurt them, just to protect yourself and sometimes thinking you're doing what is in their best interest anyway. I know it's insecurity, just wondering if others do or think of doing the same thing.

click to expand

But you are hurting them...Your doing the very thing you fear happening to yourself.

Also I'm curious why you would think walking away from someone who has chosen you is in their best interest?

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by Gemoodeye1

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by Gemoodeye1
Any gems ever break up or think of breaking up with someone once your feelings start to get real and you are afraid they might hurt you? Like starting to overthink things and make stuff up in your head or being insecure and then sabotage your own relationships?

So what's the idea...hurt them before they hurt you?

Not really to hurt them, just to protect yourself and sometimes thinking you're doing what is in their best interest anyway. I know it's insecurity, just wondering if others do or think of doing the same thing.

But you are hurting them...Your doing the very thing you fear happening to yourself.

Also I'm curious why you would think walking away from someone who has chosen you is in their best interest?

click to expand

Good point. I suppose because it's early on and I assume he is not feeling as strongly as I am starting to so I assume he would just move on and it wouldnt hurt that much.

It's the overanalyzing..."we wouldn't work out anyway because of X,Y,Z". Maybe assuming he can't handle me in the long run or seeing that our life style s might not be compatible, looking ahead to whether I could see him integrating into my life someday.

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by Gemoodeye1

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by Gemoodeye1
Any gems ever break up or think of breaking up with someone once your feelings start to get real and you are afraid they might hurt you? Like starting to overthink things and make stuff up in your head or being insecure and then sabotage your own relationships?

So what's the idea...hurt them before they hurt you?

Not really to hurt them, just to protect yourself and sometimes thinking you're doing what is in their best interest anyway. I know it's insecurity, just wondering if others do or think of doing the same thing.

But you are hurting them...Your doing the very thing you fear happening to yourself.

Also I'm curious why you would think walking away from someone who has chosen you is in their best interest?

click to expand

Yep, and the question is "why? why did they choose me" and I'm going to question everything even if I don't tell you. My guard is constantly going up and down.