What now?

I met this Gem in March and we hit it off with great chemistry. He came on strong and direct, planned a lunch with me within a week of meeting me, for a month straight he made sure we saw each other at least twice a week. We live 37 miles apart so seeing each other during the week was not easy but we have managed one hang out after work and the lunch. His parents live near me so we have made plans twice on Sundays after he visited his parents. He was very up front about him being a boyfriend material and that he is ok with no sex for now. I have met his group of friends twice, we went out both times and both times were great. He has called several times during the month, mostly to plan things to do together. He just joined a start up so pretty much works through the day and doesn't get off until almost 8pm. He has been verbally very direct, he has said many times that he likes me and likes spending time with me and the only thing that he doesn't like is I don't live in his city and i have not stayed over at his place. According to him, he is ok with no sex now but he likes the extra time we get if I stay over, however, because I have been trying to not have sex with him, I have been insisting on going home.

Everything changed after the night we all went out for my birthday. I brought a friend who made the night awkward because her date didn't show up. I gave him little attention because I was more focused on my friend who threw an awkward tantrum in front of us, including his friends. He gave me a birthday card which I had forgot to bring home with me at the end of the night, after walking out on him (because he insisted that I stay but I insisted on going home). After that weekend, he barely texted, I tried to initiate and finally got to see him about two weekends afterwards.

He said he didn't like that I insisted on going home and he felt that he wasn't getting enough affection. Again, he's ok with no sex for now but he wanted more than just kissing. He also said it has been hard to make plans with me because I never said no straight up. It was a bit unfair because the last instance he was referring to, I already made plans with my sister and I was hoping to see him after having dinner with my sister, although it did not work out.

He said he backed off, he didn't ignore me. It was true that he did reply to 80% of my texts, just took much much longer and never initiated any hang outs after my birthday. I thought things would be better after I sa

He obviously has been trying to see how far I let him go, but it's only been a month since we met. I personally try to hold off until there's more of a couply feel. There has been that feeling for sure every time we see each other, holding hands and kissing come naturally. I just wasn't completely sure if the seeing each other at least twice a week was going to happen on a regular basis. I was however, at a point where I was used to having him call me every now and then, so when he backed off I was very hurt. We have also talked openly about sex/position, etc. He knows I am fairly inexperienced and conservative.

Any idea on what to do now? How obvious should I be when it comes to asking him out (assuming that's what he's waiting for)?

I did text him yesterday asking for his weekend plan and asked if he has time to hang out. He told me he's going to Bay to Breakers, but didn't answer on whether he has time to see me.

I guess I am hoping to find out if this is him saying to leave him alone forever. I was hoping that he will warm back up after I asked to see him the first time. After that night I thought everything was all good too, except it was good for a day. Then he went back to drifting off our text conversation and still has not initiated to meet in person. At one point, after two days of not hearing from him I thought it was time to move on, but he sent me a picture of us his friends took when we last went out. I took that as a sign to keep maintaining contact but he took more than a day to answer my question about his weekend plan last week. That really hurt my feelings because I was going to ask him to hang out if he had answered my text. How should I maintain contact now? Should I ask him to hang out again this week? Like I said, I already asked but he did not answer directly, instead, he mentioned he was doing something on Sunday. Should I back off this weekend and come back again next week?

I almost feel like saying have a good weekend, let me know when you have time to do something and then just walk away from this. Will saying this make him want to actually see me?

I did not ditch him. I was not giving him a lot of attention for the first part of the night when my friend was throwing a tantrum but I did text him and said my friend wasn't happy and I kind of dragged her out to meet him, so I figured her feelings were more important. Because no one likes to be the third wheel and I didn't want to make her feel weird.

Thanks for the suggestions. I'm just a bit confused because I did chase after him after two weeks, I did ask to see him, I did address the issue. I told him I want to give him what he wants but I can't if he continues to not hang out. Is all this coldness and to directly answering me and not texting back just testing?

I'm just scared that I'll get my hopes up when he really just wants to move on. What do I do if he doesn't tell me what he's doing tonight and tomorrow night? I worry I will seem needy if I don't let him be.

Also the walking out part wasn't too dramatic. Basically he insisted that I stay and I said only for an hour but he was like, no I'm setting the alarm for 6am. Basically both of us wouldn't budge so I got up and left his apartment. I don't even know what would be nice to do for him if I don't get to see him...

I guess this is about to be the last straw, he has not responded to my text last night (I asked if he was going to dress up for bay to breakers- a race in SF). For a month since 4/18 I have been the person to start and end the conversation most of the time. If I try to mirror how much time it takes for him to reply me he would do the same. There hasn't been much from his end in terms of trying to keep the conversation going, I understand maybe he wants to see how far I would go for him, but I need some sign that he is interested still... His birthday is 6/4 and I want to do something for him, but how? and should I? Is his not texting back his way of telling him to move on?

Hey Ang, what is your sun, moon and ascendant(rising)?
We're curious :o

One thing my gem friend said was, they love to talk, but

But if he doesn't want to talk to you, he'll completely ignore you, wouldn't even look at your face.
The guy gave you attention, he's into you.
Make it worth, for all the good things you've been through together

I think he feels played. Flat out. You keep dissing him without realizing it and if you keep it up his twin will awake and I'm sure you??ve heard that the other side of a Gemini is far from a walk in the park. Get it together missy.

So, should I still try?

He has not responded to my text on Saturday, and it's Wednesday now. I understand the feeling of being played but I did straight up tell him I want to give him what he wants. I also said I can't do it if I don't get to see him. He dodged my question to hang out every time since that one time we talked about the awkwardness. I want to try my best but how do I go on without any hint from him?

I have been keeping texts light but should I just straight up tell him I miss him? I do, but I don't want to make a fool of myself if he's already moved on. He is actively dating online but I just can't get over the fact that he was so sincere and genuine a month ago, how can you go from all to nothing?

I also don't know how Gems take emotional texts, will this freak him out if I just call him or text him saying I miss him. His bday is 6/4 and I am dying to do something too...

I am Aries 4/18.

Please, any advice is appreciated. Thanks!

I think I don't mind that the power has shifted, because I want to let him know that I do have feelings for him. I know he knows that but I just have been very conservatively expressing very minimal of my feelings.
My gut is completely loss and doesn't know what to do, what is the best way to approach him?
I know I will risk sounding needy and emotional but if I don't tell him I miss him up front after him not texting me back for so long, how should I let him know how I feel?

Will he understand that I'm not trying to be a clingy ex-fling, I'm hoping to get back to where we were a month ago.

A friend of mine is a gem. His ex girlfriend constantly text him to talk, and within 4 months they broke up and got together like 5 times.
She was always the one saying how she couldn't live without him and etc.

And screen society manners! Love has to be mutual. Both of you have to act the way you are feeling. If you feel like you should open up to himself then do! I'm clingy... And I wouldn't hesitate telling someone how I feel, specially if she's that special for me.

I'm hoping that since he was still replying last Friday I have a chance. I'm not too clingy and never really asked him to hang out until after things went south between us. All the texts I sent after that have been light and checking in, what did you do this weekend kind of texts. Considering how often I used to text him he should be able to tell I'm not done with this. I also told him in person that I want things to go back to before he backed off. I'm just not sure if coming on strong in texts to tell him I miss him is a good idea now...

I guess I would stil thank you for your advice, but I am nontheless offended by your comment about a better catch coming along. I don't see what's making me not enough of a catch for him. Is it because I want to see him and I miss him? That is just reasonable behavior when you like someone. Plus, last time we talked he said he didn't think I was affectionate enough, so if anything, I wasn't showing enough interest. There has been obvious actions of interest from my end because I want to make up for the fact that he felt like I was not affectionate enough and often said yes to go on a date after him asking me a couple times. However, there has never been any kind of chasing, no texting up a storm when he's not reply, no calls to him at all. In fact, the reason why I'm still hanging along was because the first two weeks after the fallout, he found out I was sick and I jokingly asked where is my chicken soup, he replied " you will have to come to me for that." I know this isn't huge but it's nevertheless something suggestive from him, which made me keep sticking around checking in every couple days. Up until last Friday when I told him I was going to clarify something and didn't have time to text my clarification right away, he sent back a ?. I took that as a sign that he was at least interested in conversing with me. I could be totally wrong, but if there is absolutely nothing going on, why ask for my clarification? why not ignore me right then and there? Maybe I should move on because he is playing me now for fun?

I find gemini to be good mates, but the worse kind of people to fall in love with.

I think at the end of the day if I don't tell him I miss him, I will regret not saying it later.
No expectations at all, and I can understand if he has already moved on. I think later tonight i'll tell him...
"hey, how are you? don't mean to interrupt but just wanted to let you know that i miss my sunshine. i miss you"

My friend always says, if you can't wear your hear on your sleeve when you like someon then what's the point? I agree to a certain degree, and I guess now it's time to be brave and tell him.

I have actually never said that to any guy who's not even a long time bf, ever...guess getting old really makes one more accepting of oneself

Posted by Szostak
I find gemini to be good mates, but the worse kind of people to fall in love with.

What moon sign does the Gem have that you like?? I think it's more of an age thing, I know at a young age commitment would make me panic. I didn't like the thought of being tied down again. I was in a 3yr relationship in high school.

Posted by WateryGem

Posted by Szostak
I find gemini to be good mates, but the worse kind of people to fall in love with.

What moon sign does the Gem have that you like?? I think it's more of an age thing, I know at a young age commitment would make me panic. I didn't like the thought of being tied down again. I was in a 3yr relationship in high school.

click to expand

Not close enough to know her birth time. Only know birth place And birthday date.

Her ex bf betrayed her. She sa?_d she wouldnt Like to get hurt by anyone again.
Then in a party, all her girl friends kissed some guys there, as she was in the group she also did it. But only a kiss. No feelings.

For me, idk. Lip kisses, I'm starting to doubt that she didn't let me kiss her for real, because she would miss me and get hurt, at least I hope that's it, rather than being rejected and friendzoned. But that comes to another topic lol. Sorry

My gem is turning 35 in June. But the fact that he stopped contacting me after the bday fall out just seems so childish!

And I honestly never thought I would fall for someone 7years older than me.

Because he stopped contacting me because of a very trivial reason- I assume a mature person would bring up issues and address them as opposed to acting like there are no problems which he did when I saw him in person after the fallout

Listen to duchess. Everything she said was on the money.