Brother has been Silent.

Hey there, Leos!

I would like some insight on this. For the past, let's say, five years, my brother has been increasingly silent, rebellious, acting inappropriate, and is downright rude.

It has been years since I have heard a simple "hello" from the guy, and we live with each other, I see him everyday. It's come down to ignoring each other completely, I've given up and I'm fed up with name calling.

Okay.... Sometimes he will growl at me when I walk by. Yes, growl. And chomp his teeth.
I have tried and tried to be nice, tried to have conversations, but he always brushed(es) me off and replied with rude comments and tried to put me down.
He is very cold, very angry, never listens to what my father says. The other day, he had the nerve to have sex where everyone could hear it. Right where there are no walls and no doors. But it was one of the most embarrassing and disturbing things to have to listen to, my entire family could hear it downstairs and I know his girlfriend looked ashamed when she left our house.. He's getting more and more brave and it's getting just a little out of control. He just turned 17 in August, and it's his first girlfriend. He's never home and always out doing dangerous things with friends.
He overworks himself at the gym to the point that he turns blue and cannot walk straight.
He never wants to spend quality time with his family, he is mean and rotten towards everyone. He is so concerned about the way he looks, he will throw fits if he thinks something does not look right. He stomps around like he is superior to everyone, but I would like to make him feel like he does not need to feel superior; I miss my little brother who was sweet and funny. We used to get along so well and would do everything together.

I'm wondering, is this common with Leos? What can I do to help my brother put this wall down? I'd love to be able to have a conversation again.

lol reminds of myself in my teen days.... he's a teenager who is growing up, he's going to act in different ways..

oh and let me tell you something.... A teenage leo man experiencing adult hood is not a pretty site... He will grow out if it though but until then, just let it happen.. I mean he's not going out there committing any crimes.. I think its bothering you because you are paying attention to EVERY little detail about what he does.

Your brother is just going through adult hood, that is all.

Oh boy...

Let it be, then. I mean, that's what I've been doing. I cannot remember the last time we talked, is it really normal to not say a WORD anymore, though?

Where is his moon?

Aries?

Sounds like your brother is testing every limit in the book and getting away with it.

The problem is that you are his SISTER not his parent. I'm curious to know if your parents were lenient on him when he was younger. If yes, then this explains some of his actions.

It's THEIR place to try to get him back on track. He's not 18 yet so legally they still have the right to set down ground rules for his behavior in the home.

He sounds very lost and apparently in need of reins to be tightened.

Yes! Aries moon. You're good.
He also has mars in scorpio and mercury in virgo.
He MIGHT be a scorpio rising.

Yes, that is a huge problem. I've actually sat down with my parents and talked to them because I am so much more controlling than they are, they never care and they kiss his ass. I tell them they need to take charge. LOL.
Were they lenient when he was younger? Well, actually yes. When he was younger he was VERY aggressive.
Constant name calling, mind games with me. He liked to hurt my little sister for fun. I was the only one to ever tell him to stop what he was doing.
He had become so attached to his "friends." That's all he cares about anymore. He started to treat them kind of shitty and they go along with it now.
They need to make him look good. If they don't he abandons them, just like he did with me and his family. 😢

I'm not taking charge of him. And I do not think I know what is going on with him, I do not talk to him, I don't interact with him at all. I leave him alone.
I barely even speak of him anymore.
I only tell my father to try stepping up, and once in a blue moon. It's not like I am controlling his every move, I don't bother him at all.
So your suggesting I don't even try that anymore? Alright, done.

But I get it... let him be, like I've been doing. Perhaps I should try letting him know I'll always be there for him, no matter what?

LOL. Well.... okay then.

Alright. But I cannot change my nature at the flip of a coin. That could take come practice.
However I'm willing to try.

Personally, I don't think it's about you needing to change your nature. There are a lot of things that he is doing that are simply unacceptable. However, I stand by what I said before: It's your parens' job to set hin straight. If they don't have the backbone to do it then somewhere down the line it's likely that law enforcement will, especially if his behavior continues to degenerate.

SpiceNSugar, that's my current train of thought. I can try seeing the "good" in him, doubt it will do an ounce of good. I'm starting to lose hope we'll ever even talk again. I don't have respect for him when he calls me ridiculous immature names for no reason, he's leaving condom wrappers laying in the car and in the house, and I continue to receive more and more hate, on the daily, when I say absolutely nothing.
My parents are so lenient that they will go through with his every demand. It's out of my hands, there isn't anything more I can do. I've already tried telling them they aren't strict enough. I'm stepping off.

Posted by heartlocket
SpiceNSugar, that's my current train of thought. I can try seeing the "good" in him, doubt it will do an ounce of good. I'm starting to lose hope we'll ever even talk again. I don't have respect for him when he calls me ridiculous immature names for no reason, he's leaving condom wrappers laying in the car and in the house, and I continue to receive more and more hate, on the daily, when I say absolutely nothing.
My parents are so lenient that they will go through with his every demand. It's out of my hands, there isn't anything more I can do. I've already tried telling them they aren't strict enough. I'm stepping off.

How infuriating.

My youngest brother (Taurus!) was running roughshod over the household and my other brother called me

about it, because my dad was letting it slide.

Why?

Because the kid had a 4.0 gpa-- but there was an excellent chance that his drug habit was going to

kill him before he graduated college. :/

We gave the parents a guilt trip (they needed it), took it in front of a judge, and managed to get

him in rehab, but not before he totaled his car (etc, etc, etc). smh

He seems to be good now... graduated, married, has a kid... time will tell.

I don't regret it-- I considered it a life or death situation-- but it shouldn't have been

that difficult.

It's really unfortunate that your parents don't " have what it takes" to handle your bro. I'm sure it also hurts you to see your relationship with him deteriorate. There are a few things that I'd like to suggest you keep in mind that may be helpful.

1) This is not your fault nor is it your problem. Yes, you have to live under the same roof and it's crappy, but you've done your part.

2) The odds are high that he'll come to his senses with age and more life responsibilities thrown at him.

3) Collect his condom wrappers in a glass jar and give it to him as a birthday gift. LOL.

Gaah, I'm sorry that had to happen Montgomery, that is very frustrating... But it's a good thing he is doing better now, drugs are awful :/

SpiceNSugar, thanks 😉 What a terrific idea. HAHA, what a great birthday present...

Jynja, I didn't even react around my brother when I found the condom wrappers, and I KNOW for a fact he is trying to piss me off. I never show any sort of reaction around him, I actually get so mad though that sometimes I do bite back at his ridiculous little games. The other day he wouldn't stop having loud sex (there are no walls or doors) and so when he was away, I made a "special" spread and put it all over his bed sheets and pillows.... it was invisible, too. Sssh he doesn't know...
It's when I have come to my last nerve do I do stupid immature things to get revenge. But it's never big.

but hey.... it worked. Stunk like a motherfucker, and she left.

Other than that I brush literally everything off. Well on the surface, that is. 😉

😆

It's my only defense against this type of situation. LOL

Posted by heartlocket
Gaah, I'm sorry that had to happen Montgomery, that is very frustrating... But it's a good thing he is doing better now, drugs are awful :/

Thanks... and yeah, it really was.

I should probably add that if he was just being an ass (sans drugs), I wouldn't have stepped in.

But I don't live there, either.

My concern, as well as my (other) brother's, was also for my dad-- my youngest brother was born when

he was well into his forties-- soo... let it suffice to say that it was just a very tumultuous time.

Every situation is different.

You'll likely find that when you leave home (which, for you, won't be long), your perspective will

change... and your brother will MISS you. lol 🙂


Hope this all works out for you.

—

Aw, thank you Montgomery!

Yes, I will be leaving in the next couple of years. As for my brother, he might even leave earlier than me.
All he wants to do is go away to college. I'm in college myself but close to home. That's fine with me, LOL.


I hope it works out, too.