Feeling discouraged...

and probably my own fault and should just move on.

The Libra guy I have been "seeing" or not seeing rather has been quite distant in the past month. We still text occasionally but he has been dealing with some personal issues and in a funk. I am trying to let him know I am there for him as a friend. Being encouraging and trying to lift him up.

I text him every few days and sometimes he answers, sometimes he doesn't. Been kind of hanging on because I am hoping things get better and more balanced for him and we can continue where we left off but I am feeling very discouraged and not so patient anymore. Even feeling a little depressed myself lately. He has not come out and said he wants me to stop talking to him, in fact he has said my texts have been lifesavers for him.

I'm just to the point where I feel I'm losing grip and should just walk away from him. I want to be happy with someone who wants to make me happy. He is not available for that lately.

Am I doing the right thing by "waiting"? I know most of you will say move on and let him go He will come around when he is ready and able IF he wants to. I get that..just my stupid Scorpio loyalty wants to give him the benefit of the doubt. I don't give up on people easy especially when they are in hard times.

More of a vent here...I haven't outright said this to him yet. Don't want to add more to his list of woes.

Don't throw in the towel !! Youve investd alot here and he's just slow to come around and he's unbalenced. Spring is coming and things might take a good turn soon. . do something simple for Valentines and stay strong. He said it himself , you are a lifesaver.

You know these kind of situations are super hard on a woman and I totally get where you are coming from but here's another spin on it, it's totally okay to stay if you're happy. If you're not happy then you should reconsider allowing yourself to continue to invest in him all the while getting zero interest in return.

This is an imbalanced situation because you are the one playing the MALE ROLE, you're the one chasing him, yes chasing includes predominantly being the one to initiate contact, you are the one that's loyal to a fault and on the other hand he can take it or leave it.

If you continue to GIVE AND GIVE AND GIVE AND GIVE you are actually CREATING a huge imbalance where you are the one putting pressure on him to eventually give back, his response to that is to CREATE imbalance to avoid giving back.

What happens when a man feels this kind of pressure? He avoids, he runs, he hides, he ignores, he just doesn't want to have anything to do with you on an intimate kind of level, he's suddenly being forced to play the feminine role and that role is to accept or reject, this is the ONLY ROLE he can play in light of you using your MASCULINE energy.

You have to make some adjustments so you won't feel depressed, hurt, disappointed. You can't continue putting your heart out to a man that's shielding his heart.

You are asking for misery when you don't pull back, adjust your behavior to align itself with what's realistically going on between the 2 of you which is NOTHING (right now). You don't have to leave him but you do have to stop trying to demonstrate your loyalty, IT'S NOT WORKING and it reeks of desperation when a guy isn't feeling it with you.

If you keep doing what you're doing out of blind loyalty you will continue to be depressed/miserable and alone in love all by yourself so you must change your behavior to bring balance to your current situation by stopping EVERYTHING you are currently doing b/c IT'S NOT WORKING and to the contrary it's a total TURN OFF b/c it smells like desperation and maybe then he will decide to give more of himself at some point but no one can say for sure, right now you're getting nothing and you should mirror that and give nothing so you will no longer feel depressed and desperate for a positive outcome.

libragem...
I was thinking this too as he has been in his funk since Christmas time. I'm sure the holidays have upset him. He even said so in a way.
As far as Valentine's day...I am leery. I really do not know if doing anything would be a good idea. I don't want to put pressure on him thinking something needs to be done in return but also don't want to make him feel I didn't think of him.


tiki...
I have tried to back off and ignore him..it is hard. I feel the need to check in on him every couple days even though I know I need to let him notice I have gone missing.


I don't feel ready to give up on him...just need to know where things are heading. If this is just a temporary bump or side road. I want to get back to that nice scenic country road I was traveling on with him. It was really great :-)

Aramei it's like baking, if you put too much sugar in the batter the cake is spoiled so what you're doing right now is SPOILING any and all possibilities to have a balanced reciprocal relationship, it's not him, it's you, it's your need to behave in a codependent capacity that's ruining your chances.

It's completely okay to be kind woman but even kind women have to learn how to back off and allow the other person to put in some reciprocation. What you're doing is continuing to give without ever receiving reciprocation and then what follows is you giving more and more and more and yet you've missed the whole point, the point is you're giving and being kind hasn't changed anything and so giving more of yourself, your kindness will only be met with more of the same which is NOTHING/CRUMBS of attention.

You can't continue doing what you're doing because if you do continue then you are CONTRIBUTING to your depression and misery. See it's not him, IT'S YOU, it's your need to cling to a man that isn't into you which is causing you pain.

Things are heading nowhere, that's the realistic truth. When a relationship is heading forward both people are contributing to the relationship in order for it to MOVE forward but when there is only one person contributing and the other person has checked out then there is nowhere for the relationship to go, it's stalled and stale and it's over.

You have to let the PAST GO and look at the present, the present is this, he's no longer the guy you were with on the nice country road, that guy is gone and he's not coming back.

Not sure if he has mental issues, some men do, you may have caught him at his SEASONAL PEAK, meaning his moods and attitudes change with the seasons, he may come back but you may have to wait until Spring or Summer but then he'll be right back to where he is at now during the winter months.

Be careful Ariamei, you're biting off way more than you can chew, you can't be this desperate or men/a man will eventually take advantage of you. Some men are not there to stay in our lives forever, some men are there for a season, a reason but not forever.

I have to agree with tiki and theultra..as someone with many Leeb placements I can say that once we say that we're not really in it our involvement is done
Then it just feeds our ego if you keep msging/calling

I have not texted him in few days (since Friday..which is long time for me..LOL) Waiting for him to make next move, if any. To notice my quietness. I AM ready to move on, feel like I am just pushed aside till he is bored and remembers I'm there.
Either way I will be ok.

I am not sure I am ready to throw the anger and demands out there just yet as I don't want to ruin something if he truly is having other issues that he needs time to deal with.

I feel like I am out of balance!!!

Aramei good luck and just know you deserve more than nothing, you're getting nothing and all the excuses that he makes are just excuses and you believing his excuses gives him an easy way out.

He's not into you (right now) therefore he's giving you ZERO of his energy and you sticking around for nothing really sends out the wrong message about you which is you're desperate because any woman with a smidgen of self respect, pride, dignity would never stick around for nothing from a man and surely she wouldn't chase him every few days, she'd forget about any man that isn't giving her some type of good energy.

Misery loves company and if you're not a miserable person than move on.

Everyone here is telling you things you already know. Girl come on now, you spend A LOT of time reading the post about these libra guys, you know darn well you CANNOT wait on a libra to make up his mind. You WILL always be waiting. However, I don't encourage you to push him into stepping up, because when forced or bossed around, Libra??s only rebel and become even more distant.

If I were you, I??d just back off. If you want to check up on him because you??re —just that kind of person??, then do so, but don't complain about the results when you do. Just do it because you want to, not because you??re expecting a bright outcome because you are setting yourself up for disappointment if it doesn't go that way. He says he's going through a lot right now, then so be it. Let him go through it, alone. Shoot it's obvious through his actions that he doesn't want nor need your help. Not trying to sound harsh, I'm being realistic

And his blah blah about —Oh your text's save my life??. Oh please. If this were true, trust me you??d hear from him a lot more often. Even if it's just him saying hi. Libra men are CHARMERS! Your sweet to him, so why would he want to burn bridges with you. He cant have that, so he says sweet things to keep you near IF he should ever need you. (Sort of selfish huh, well YOU have control over that hun). They almost ALWAYS say what they THINK people want to hear, often hiding their true motives behind their actions. Most of the time their partners are so hung up on the beautiful heart warming things that they say, that they hardly realize their actions are saying something completely different. Pay attention to how he's treating you, BUNK what he's saying. If you shut your ears off and open your eyes instead, you can surely beat a libra at their own game, and you definitely wont be confused.

Okay, yes listen to tiziani. Let us all know how that works out. If what she's been doing were bringing out a good outcome then she would'nt be posting. But by all means keep giving him 100% of your loyalty and nice sweet behavior. I really wanna see how it turns out.

But like i said, if he meant the things he says, he'd show it. I'm a libra. FULL BLOWN. And i'm telling you when we truly honestly deeply care for someone, we never leave that person in the dark. Thats the ONE person we dont want in the dark or wondering where they stand or how much we care. But go ahead. Do you...

Thanks gals. I know you are right. I am just so pissed and myself and angry at him too. Hate not having an answer to what is going on, hate being put aside till he feels ready.

Tonight I texted him friendly and asked him how he was doing, was thinking of him. He said he was doing ok, working a lot. Asked me how I was doing (I'm sure just to be nice). I answered I was ok...but SO badly wanted to say something mean and nasty..LOL. Got no reply from him, made me feel like I wasn't acknowledged.

Believe me, I am trying very hard to just let it go and move on, trying very hard to let him deal with whatever he has to deal with. He just confused me so much with the things he has said and I am feeling all messed up.

I guess the fact that tomorrow is Heart Day doesn't help. I don't expect anything from him. I did buy him a card few weeks ago and planned on putting it in his mailbox but now wondering if I should just not. Yet, I don't want him to feel I don't care....so many decisions. Why I get so confused..LOL My heart and mind are constantly fighting over the right/wrong thing to do.

Thank you again girls...I really do appreciate your help with this Libra. Sometimes wish he would of never contacted me again the second time even though deep down I felt like the happiest girl in the world.

I am not expecting a relationship to come out of all this. Right now I am just happy knowing that he knows I'm his friend and care for him. Just hate him leaving me in the dark...which as Pink said he is doing. Which must mean he doesn't care as much as I thought. 😢

Angry right now!

He's not dealing with anything, he's just too coward to tell a wonderful, sweet, kind, caring woman to go away. A man truly doesn't want to lose a good woman from his life even if he's not that into her.

It's not his issues Aramei, it's just that he isn't into you. Think about it, men have problems all the time and yet if they care about a woman even love her and is into her he's still going to make time to communicate, to spend time together, given that he's too self involved to include you in his life the best thing you can do for YOU is to have your own back and move on.

I keep saying to you that your behavior has a stench of desperation and you still continue on with the desperate behavior eg initiating contact when it's clear he has no real urge to speak to you.

Your need to reach out to him only works against you because men smell our need and remain in "avoid her" mode if he's not interested. You won't ever know if he truly thinks about you--is into you unless you allow him to initiate contact.

The reason why I say you're chasing is because you feel more than friendly feelings and he feels nothing. He's giving you zero energy. If he communicate with you he'll be leading you on thus to avoid being an even bigger asshat he's attempting to say as little as possible in hope that you'll eventually take a hint and move on.

You keep using masculine energy. For example you care about his feelings well men do that, they care about our feelings when their into us women, you chase him--well men do that--they chase and pursue the women they want to capture, they do a predominate amount of initiating--men do that and so you see you BEING THE MAN in this dynamic will continue to give you the same results and on top of that you are forcing this guy to be in a position that he isn't comfortable with--he's not comfortable using his feminine energy to reject you.

You've really turned this into you being the man and him having no choice but to use his girl energy to say NO by doing nothing b/c yeah that's how some of us women are, we don't want to let a man down so we hope he catches the hint (eventually if she avoids him long enough) to go away. Well he's doing the exact same thing we women do when we're not interested.

It's not his fault that you are revolving your life around him, if you'd just stop doing that you'd feel so much better.

Are You Doing Any Of The Things On This List? If So, You May Be Pushing Him Away.

Are you chasing after a man and don't even know it?

I know how frustrating it is to sit back and let a man drift away. Every single one of us women instinctively want to go run after a man, grab him and throw him to the ground, rather than let him get away.

We know we're not supposed to be chasing after him, and yet it's so hard not to. In this new, modern era, we're all confused:

We all get the lines between friendship and romance blurred
We think being "friendly" is the same as showing interest in a man
We're taught to think that reaching out to a man is necessary
We're taught to think that if we act "casual" a man won't notice that we're actually chasing him
But, the truth is, we are.

If we're feeling just "friendly," if we really don't feel attracted to, or interested, in a man, then WHATEVER WE DO, our "vibe" will be just "friendly."

But, if we actually ARE attracted to a man, if we ARE interested in him in a romantic way, and then we try to ACT "friendly" - it's going to come off as fake. Don't be afraid of appearing weak. If you need something - something of course that has nothing to do with the relationship - don't be afraid to ask. This is what being a girl is all about.

It's going to come across to him as inauthentic. It's going to come across to him like chasing. And, it's going to make him feel all kinds of things, but none of those things will be what you want him to feel - attraction for you.

How Do You Know If You're Chasing?

Here are some things we may think of as "friendly," that are actually CHASING a man:

1. Calling Him Up

This includes:

Calling him because you heard or read about something interesting, or because you knew there was a great band playing somewhere, or someone told you about some great event that you want to invite him to or - anything at all
Calling him to ask him why he hasn't called you
Calling him to tell him you're upset that you haven't heard from him
Calling him to give him directions to your home or answering any question he hasn't specifically asked, or giving him any information he hasn't specifically asked for, or offering anything

2. Initiating Other "Friendly" Contact

This includes:

E-mailing him
Texting him
Facebooking him
Writing him
Sending him a cute card
Dropping by his house
Dropping by his gym
Calling up his friend
...Or in any way attempting to initiate some kind of contact.

3. Moving Things Forward

This includes:

Making suggestions, making plans and then inviting him to come and join you, offering to drive to him, offering to drive on the date, offering to put him up for the night on your couch, or in your bed...
Offering to cook for him, initiating sex, initiating affection (in any way other than smiling with an open heart and body), initiating the "talk" about "where the relationship is going," getting anything having to do with the relationship "started"...
Creating a "special occasion," sending him anything (pictures, mementos, ideas), thinking out loud to him about things you can do together, telling him about things you can do together, and creating things to do together...
...Or, in any way, acting like the social director of the relationship.

4. Asking Him How He "Feels"

This includes, especially, asking him how he feels about "you," or the "relationship."

These are things we do almost without even thinking about it. These are things that feel natural to us. It feels almost weird and unnatural to not do these things. It feels like we're not being "nice."

It feels like we're not being "friendly." It feels like we're going to lose him by not letting him know we're "interested" in him. It feels like we're just letting him slip through our fingers.

And Nothing Could Be Further From The Truth

Everything on the list above is the same as putting a sign on your chest that says "Needy." It smacks of desperation. And, it's just plain not attractive to him.

He may LIKE it. He may go along with it. He may be flattered. He may have no one else around and so he'll date you. He may even come to like you very much. You may even end up in a relationship with him.

But, you will never know how he really feels about you. As long as YOU'RE the one running the show, he may follow, but he'll never feel inspired. And, you will never feel adored. This is the point where you will find yourself up late at night crying and wondering why he doesn't want to commit to you.

Aramei,

This is coming from a man who was once in your situation. Love...you have to let him go. I too spent nights crying over my Libra ex. The texting, the emailing, the sadness. Wondering how someone who said they loved me could act like I don't exist. She was my everything, my world. When we parted, I could barely function. There were times when I would be at work and would have to run to the restroom because I couldn't stop the tears from flowing and I would sit in the stall staring at my phone trying to will her to call me. There were days when I simply wanted to leave everybody and everyone and be alone the rest of my life. Then, I would reach out. A text, an email, a card. Sometimes she responded, most of the time she didn't.

I know you'll hate to hear this because it hurts...but he's gone and there's nothing you can do about it. He knows you love him. He knows you care. You don't have to keep trying to prove yourself to him and I stopped trying to prove myself for her. Let him go and save that love for someone you don't have to prove it to. Who will stay no matter how hard it gets. The man who will guard your heart because he knows how to protect it. Give without expectation. If its not returned, take comfort in the good you did and make space in your heart for the right one.

I have thought a lot last night and this morning about how I am behaving. Yes, it has been a bit out there. I guess I just have felt like he needs me in some way. He mentioned at one time how my texts make him feel better. Yet I feel a need to stop. It is not doing anything but making myself crazy. I hate how he is keeping me hanging...and I know it is my own head that is making a fantasy out of what is really going on.

No worries peoples....I'm done and moving on. I sent him a happy heart day and good wishes for him text today and that is my last contact with him. If he chooses to find me later so be it. I threw the Vday card away that I had gotten for him.

I know I deserve better.

I am not making him out to be a bad person. The person I had started to get to know until he got into his mood was a sweet, caring, nice guy and that is who I kept seeing in my head over these last few weeks. Maybe he does just need time to figure things out, I just know I have no more energy to try to be supportive.

Leave the Bipolar acting assclown alone, they all seem sweet in the beginning until they recognize they just might have to reciprocate and then they shut down. DELETE DELETE DELETE, delete his number and every form of communication and go out with a man who actually want to give his time and attention and appreciation to you just because for him you're enough and you don't have to hound a man just to get a hello.

Learn something from this situation because you'll meet another him, plenty of em out there and the next time a guy appears interested only to use some kind of excuse to check out on you then you check out on him and move on and forget everything he's ever lead you to believe about him, don't hold onto empty words because when a man truly is into you he won't allow his problems to get in the way of having the one best thing he has going on in his life.

Soo...he responds to my text last night and then calls me on the phone..WTH is going on? LOL I was a bit distant in the phone conversation. I just let him talk and say what he wanted to. Was just general conversation but was also my first phone call with him in almost 2 months! Strange.

He said he just took some time to realize where his priorities should be.

Just taking things as they are. Not jumping back in or getting a big head again. Still just doing my thing.

I can slate whoever the fuck I want and I say that with a huge grin on my face.

That POWER he wields to pull you along with his silly little words of attention. He's very aware you're on the way out so he has to keep you right where you are where he's the one wielding all the power and you're waiting.

Some men do that when they feel powerless in their own lives so what better way to be and feel in control with the women that expects so much but get so little in return--that's a power move, to give you so little that you'll be thirsty and clinging to him to get more.

I can guarantee you once you're pulled back in, sending him text messages every few days he'll go back to being distant and confused.

The reason why you Aramei are being treated this way is because you're displaying desperation and when a woman does that she opens the pathway to be strung along. It's not his fault, he's just taking advantage of the opportunity to be in control.

A 44 year old woman should know this game already! I'm not sure why she put up with this crap but clearly she has some self esteem, self worth issues to allow herself to be dumped and placed in such a pitiful position over a man that's done nothing but spit verbal word salad to keep her contained, feeling discouraged and desperate.

See how giddy you are over his crumbs of excuses about him getting his priorities straight suddenly. What self respecting woman does that to herself?

I have no hatred or bad feelings towards anyone's opinions. It is good to get the good and bad point of things here on the boards. Helps one to focus. I am not taking anyone's advice or doing what anyone says to do here. I am doing what I feel is right for ME. Nobody knows my situation fully or his.

As far as the power game...I do not feel he is doing that. I just think he is confused about what he wants in his life right now and I am just being a friend trying to help him sort it out. Yes, I would like a romantic relationship with him as it had started out to be. Right now he is not in that place to do so.

You would be proud Tiki to know that I have not texted him all day :-)..letting him make moves from now on. I also know I have to be careful of getting reeled back into my own emotions about him.

One day at a time...all I can do right now.

I will have to say that Libras are the most confusing, roller coaster people I have ever met..but in a good way!

LOL@confused. A grown man that dumped you is not confused? He's just enamored with your inability to go away, the attention you give is hard to let go and I think you know this already so you're continuing on in hopes he'll come back to you.

As for sorting out his issues, well unless I missed something about your situation he didn't come out of your womb, he's an adult and he can sort his own shit out, you didn't help him get to where he is and you surely aren't responsible with HELPING him sort it out. I hope some day you'll begin rejecting any man that can't give you just as much love and positive energy you give to him.

Whatever the case, I wish you the best and I'll still peep in in hopes you grow from this and start taking better care of yourself in the face of rejection.

As for you Tiz, stick to the topic. You're need to debate my words display your insecurities. I don't have to say you're wrong in order for me to appear right, I'm pretty confident, be confident in yourself and you won't feel the need to try so hard to make your words appear relevant.

A hit dog holla, a sore spot has been hit. Could it be you too treat women that you're not into the same way? Hopefully you're more evolved than that.

You appear to have some power moves of your own but you can take your power games and shove it where DXP don't shine. This so isn't about you or me so let's not bog down her thread with our BS, let's drop this issue, actually no you don't have to drop it, I will.

You're off topic when you're speaking about me to someone else on her thread about someone else. This isn't the Tiki & Tiz thread. No need to argue with an undercover asshole.

LOL

Wow you are so passive aggressive. You start an argument but pretend not to LOL. Oh the mindfucking behavior is so funny.

No need to bring me up unless you felt threatened by my words. What is it to you if I "slate" someone. You act as if you have a vested interest in being the only one to say anything of relevance on DXP. Awww I hit a sore spot so you must defend the assclownery.

You are so caught up on this "controlled, manipulated, power game" that you're outing yourself to be exactly that. Hilarious! And you act like a nice guy but you're just like her ex, an undercover assclown so of course you would defend his mindfuckery towards her.

LOL

More mindfuck talk. You don't have to understand where I'm coming from because I was not talking to you in the first place. As for the email, no I don't remember and I don't have to remember and I wonder why after this.

And now you know why he encouraged you to continue making an ass out of yourself, it's because he's an asshole so why not tell you to keep trying LOL.

Aramei you have to be real careful about posters intentions because misery loves company and there are some miserable human beings on DXP that encourage fuckery and their are also assholes who will defend other assholes and encourage you to continue doing behavior that makes you look like a damn fool.

It wouldn't kill you to shut the fuck up talking to me. Try that.

Don't feel discouraged. It's just dick. There are plenty of them out there. Just be sure to find a clean one.

In this thread I half agree with both Tiki & Tiziani completely agree with what Rocky just said.

I agree with Tiziani in that NOT everything is always a game in relationships. Its NOT always the case of cruel intentions and whatnot. People show and express love in different ways, some are more expressive while some show it it subtle ways due. Somebody's past I believe has a lot to do with how one behaves in a one on one relationship. Past hurts, rejection, etc may trigger caution and concealment of feelings in how one expresses themselves in future relationships. With that said, I disagree with you, Tiziani, for encouraging the OP to keep contacting this man while he seems to only remember her when she reaches out to him 1st. Relationships are about team-work between equal partners, there's no supervisor and a general worker... the work load should be the same and personal problems shouldnt make one a slacker and make the other partner do all the work alone. He told her about his "priorities" ONLY after she contacted him, why did he fail to update her on that before she made a call to him? If she was important in his life he would have made sure to tell her how great he was progressing without her having to remind him of her existance. I dont think this guy is into her like she is into him based on that fact alone. When we truelly like people we always make sure that they are the 1st to know EVERYTHING about us, good or bad and that without being coaxed into it... doing it as an afterthought is not how it usually goes. I'm not an expert in love matters, im still a student and what i just said i learned in my last semester lol. I'm still willing and eager to learn more.

Tiki gives good advice but I personally have a problem taking what she writes seriously because as great as it is, it seems to come from a place of anger and bitterness towards men in general. I may be wrong but thats how it comes across to me. Men are not always the enemy or to be blamed in these situations because us women always fail to see the writting on the wall, we delude ourselves, telling ourselves that "oh, he'll finally reach a point and realize that we are good together... if i stick around long enough". That kind of thinking is not good and it leads us to be taken advantage of. Men arent the enemy if you as a woman decide to hold on to a distorted romantic dream after he has showed you exact how much you are worth to him, by his actions or words... you arent being used and abused, you volunteered to be used and abused. Cant blame men for that. Yeah there are men who are "undercover assholes", but most of their tactics are encouraged and made worse by us women by sitting there & take it without protest or taking an exit. People arent perfect and cant do everything we expect them to, but that doesnt automatically make them horrible individuals or "ass clown" etc. There's growth in error and there's also growth in allowing yourself be heartbroken every now and then. You learn & gain nothing from expecting pure evil in every given situation... even the bad things are good for us long term for spiritual growth. Think of bacteria, doesnt it have its advantages? In short, no gender is the enemy, we are our own worst enemies in these situations, but its all for good in the end... WE LEARN.

I guess when it comes to love we all differ and take/apply the lessons learned from each broken relationship differently. I am a very optimistic person (sadge venus) and i rarely fall inlove, but when i do, i fall hard & when i do get my heart broken... I take any useful lesson i got from it and ditch all resentment & negativity with the rest of the bs, NEXT! Any lessons learned are to better myself as an individual and not to be used as a weapon in future relationships, thats unhealthy in my opinion. It all depends on each individual, i guess... no wrong or right way.

I wasn't talking to you so why the fuck do you care what I've stated to someone else? I surely wasn't focusing on your statements, no need to because last I checked you aren't that important to me.

You didn't ask me directly about understanding my statement. You went about it in a round about way to bring what I've stated down to compete and now you're back pedaling on what you meant.

Had you said "Tiki what do you mean by that statement?" I certainly would have explained but no you went in on "I don't know why people like Tiki" which is a direct attack in a passive aggressive way.

I don't ask anything about you because I don't care to know anything about you, I.m not here for you, I was here for Aramei and because you feel the need to hog the thread as if you're some kind of DXP Libra King you came at it like a passive aggressive wimp, so much for being King.

threads like this always make wonder why Libra and Aquas are paired together?!

As for you Watercup, go ahead on with your dumb ideaology. You are one of the main females on DXP acting desperate and stupid over some guy that half ass want you. How long you been here? Still doing stupid shit that doesn't work.

You too could use a good verbal ass whooping regarding your desperate needy behavior but It's not enough time in the day for your shit.

The women I help on DXP have been successful but for you you're still being a doormat so keep doing that since you appear to be comfortable being some guys ass wipe.

LOL Tiz this thread is not about you. Continue on with your Narcissism. Oh okay you win! You win I lose LOL

As for my success I am very private regarding the people I help here and it will remain that way. I'm not so self involved I need the people I assist to tell everyone about it, no that's not how I function here.

The guy who cares says keep calling LOL, yes I see your caring entails encouraging women to have needy desperate behavior, it's the self involved Narcissist in you. You're really good at helping women be needy.

LMAO! The Narc is projecting passive aggressive behavior onto me now. Your attempt at mindfucking is hilarious.

LMAO And you're too Narcissistic to know the LOL wasn't me conceding, it was bait to to sniff out the Narc to ensure you're a true Narc colors are exposed and you passed flying Narc colors. It's that ALL ABOUT ME,I MUST WIN that gives it all away.

My help is not a secret, it's that I don't need anyone to back up my claim, that's called being confident and self assured which is something you lack thus you're envy shines bright.

Lol @ everything you just said. I'm not offended though only amused because none of what you just said applies to me or is true. You know absolutely nothing (other than the bits I let out here and there) about me or the person who wants me half arsed as you put it, so there's not much for me to say or do there other let out a big fat "lmao". Proceed because humour is the only thing I can never say no to. And never EVER in your life EVER think that I'm in desperate need or thirst of your so called help, I'm capable of solving my own problems by myself, thank you very much... go lend your "help" elsewhere. Now, where were you again? I'm all ears

And lmao @ me needing a verbal arse whooping from YOU... who do you think you are? Unlike the other poor souls that you think need your help, I dont care about people's advice to me or their opinions of me, my opininion of myself is the only one that counts. How I go about my business is my headache & nobody else's unless *I* seek out help otherwise I don't give two shits about unsolicited advice. Lady, just who the fuck do you think you are talking to?

What does how long I've been here have to do with anything? And how is my "stupidity" any of your concern? I dont remember being your representative. I'm here for myself and dont care how I'm seen by anybody in this place. I'm not here in this place to prove myself to anybody about anything, I'm here to have fun and be as stupid as I want. I'm not here to seek approval or some kind of status to be admired by, I could care less. YOU are the self appointed in-house people helper aka relationship coach, doesnt mean all of us are here for that. I've got a real life to live, real ambitions to reach and being a DXP Empress doesnt feature in my list of things to achieve in this life time. My god!

Posted by WaterCup
Lol @ everything you just said. I'm not offended though only amused because none of what you just said applies to me or is true. You know absolutely nothing (other than the bits I let out here and there) about me or the person who wants me half arsed as you put it, so there's not much for me to say or do there other let out a big fat "lmao". Proceed because humour is the only thing I can never say no to. And never EVER in your life EVER think that I'm in desperate need or thirst of your so called help, I'm capable of solving my own problems by myself, thank you very much... go lend your "help" elsewhere. Now, where were you again? I'm all ears

What you've revealed is enough and you are thirsty as ever. I've read your whining and moaning and bullshit to the point of puking so continue being a low self esteem doormat and keep your boring diatribe of useless words to yourself.

I was not talking to you but of course like an insecure low self esteem clingy person you run into a conversation that has nothing to do with you.

I'm not your lover so let me go and stop allowing me to control you as you cling onto my words, I've heard you say the same thing before about me, I don't give 2 fucks about what your thirsty insecure mind think about me and keep my name out of your mouth if you don't like what I have to say.

Posted by tiziani
You needed bait to confirm something I've already spoken about several times before? A worm with feathers it is then.

I'm asking you for one thing to be a good sport, you refuse. I asked you to share some experience of yours (not anyone) you... quite directly.... you, and apparently there's something "passive" in that in your mind.

I think this is an obvious example, to keep it in the context of the thread, that heart wins out over mind anytime. And I'm asking you because I care tiki.

Oh the Narc is talking in riddles now and throwing more passive aggressive words around. Move on fool. LOL@share...I owe you nothing.

I don't bow down to insecure males who have cat fights like he's a female. I'm sure you have something better to do than cat fight with females.

The Narc has declared himself the winner! As if there was ever anything to win.

Posted by WaterCup
And lmao @ me needing a verbal arse whooping from YOU... who do you think you are? Unlike the other poor souls that you think need your help, I dont care about people's advice to me or their opinions of me, my opininion of myself is the only one that counts. How I go about my business is my headache & nobody else's unless *I* seek out help otherwise I don't give two shits about unsolicited advice. Lady, just who the fuck do you think you are talking to?

If you don't care about my advice and/or peoples advice then shut the fuck up and move on. Why waste so much of your precious energy on a conversation that has absolutely nothing to do with you. Why? Because you're dick thirsty so you're clinging to Tiz's dick. Move on bitch and wipe the brown shit off your nose.

Lmao @ what I've revealed and what exactly have I revealed, oh wise one? For such a "smart" person you sure are dumb if you are going to make a conclusion based on tiny bits of information. If I'm so thirsty for whatever this man has to offer, how come I dont bombard this forums with "thirsty" threads about him? In my history in this place I've made only 1 thread about him, so much for my clinginess. About the conversation I interjected myself into... this is a public forum, lovey, I dont need an invitation or your permission to say my views so get over get over your wishful thinking that makes you think you run this place or its people. If YOU dont like MY views dont answer either, just ignore

Lol @ controlling me, you wish! Whether I care or not I'm still gonna answer because I can and its that simple. I'm not clinging on nobody's dick, I stand alone and why are you so obsessed with men and their relation to women? You must have been hurt pretty bad by one, Eileen Wournos of the net. Btw, cussing at me and calling me names is not gonna make me back down if thats how you intimidate people. I can go on on this the whole night and remain unmoved by any swear word you may throw my way. What was that, again?

@Aramei,

I'd listen to both Tiziani and Tiki. What she said about crumbs of attention once again reminds me of my past situation. My advice is the same a theirs...do your own thing and don't invest too much into hi until he comes correct. In fact, answer his calls and texts on your time. He has to earn his way back in.

Batting back and forth with a female, not a good look. I've agreed to nothing Narc boy.

Posted by WaterCup
Lol @ controlling me, you wish! Whether I care or not I'm still gonna answer because I can and its that simple. I'm not clinging on nobody's dick, I stand alone and why are you so obsessed with men and their relation to women? You must have been hurt pretty bad by one, Eileen Wournos of the net. Btw, cussing at me and calling me names is not gonna make me back down if thats how you intimidate people. I can go on on this the whole night and remain unmoved by any swear word you may throw my way. What was that, again?

Why are you so obsessed with me? LMAO!

Don't back down, continue looking like an irrelevant loser that's thirsty and obsessed with me like Tiz. Miserable Bitch.

LMAO@stalked an ex ROTFL!! Oh gosh so funny. The stalker accuses me of being a stalker. Let me ask my husband if I'm stalking him LMAO! Oh gosh this is too much LOL.

I owe you nothing, not even my word.

Posted by Leeeebra
From my own life experience I know people with water nature survive on constant stimulation of emotions, water is not an energy that fair well with pockets of void. where the air nature is large quantities of space. The advices of an air energy would tell you: wait it out, live life as you should, independently, and joyfully, give him a chance when he does finish with his need of solitude, if you are available, and willing. it's easily said than done. we don't feel life like you do, and yes, we will go inside that solitude from time and time again regardless our relationship statues. are you willing to commit to that? Is he willing to commit to living outside of his head and for a lack of better word, with you? to mix energies that don't naturally mix, it means both of you need to live outside of your elements. It means if you decided here, right now, to commit to the level to actually give love a chance to grow, he has to be on the same page with you. He is not, he is at a place in his life where he has to deal with the noises of living before he is focused enough to commit to finding the answers. Don't feel hurt by it, it is not personal, it's more about that's how we function since we were born, he is this way before he met you, he will be this way after, unless something fundamentally changes, that's called an union. But don't get light years ahead of yourselves, commitment comes before love gets real.

As to how to relate to him, communicate to him your essential wants and needs and worries and hopes. If he is worth his salt in returning your commitment(it may or may not be now), you will feel it. Before that, love yourself, constructively.

I am starting to understand this different "thinking" of air and water signs. It is hard to comprehend but it does make sense. As far as whether we will work together or stay together I do not know. We connect on some other levels that may make it work but honestly I cannot say if it would be a very long relationship. Just taking it a day at a time and forcing myself to stop and think before I act

Posted by beautifulsoul74
@Aramei,

I'd listen to both Tiziani and Tiki. What she said about crumbs of attention once again reminds me of my past situation. My advice is the same a theirs...do your own thing and don't invest too much into hi until he comes correct. In fact, answer his calls and texts on your time. He has to earn his way back in.

Those are my intentions from now on. I have learned a lesson in how to deal with him and my own emotions regarding him. I do still feel he is worth putting my effort into, but ONLY if he is giving back. Right now I am not making any more effort than he is. :-)