How do you cope with a loss?

I have been on and off with a cancer guy most of this year. We get together for a couple weeks and I become really invested. He eventually calls it quits and the cycle repeats. I actually feel stupid for believing that he genuinely wants to be together but he's usually so convincing. I'm not sure if this past "break up" is for good or not, but as soon as he wanted out I didn't beg to make it work for the first time. I let him leave and haven't spoken to him in almost two weeks.

Anyways, I'm not sure if this is effective or not but sometimes I wallow in the person I've been hurt by. I listen to songs that remind me of them or check their facebook occasionally. I feel like being reminded of being hurt will eventually force myself to move on instead of just trying to forget about it.

Not sure if I'm making any sense but if I am, does anyone else do this?

Yes, I've done that but honestly the best way to get over someone is to get really involved with someone or something else that you enjoy. It works better, for me, than wallowing in so much pain. You can't force this, but you can get out there where there is a chance of it happening to you.

Hugs. I hope you'll feel better soon.

Posted by Season
Yes, I've done that but honestly the best way to get over someone is to get really involved with something else that you enjoy. It works better, for me, than wallowing in so much pain.

Hugs. I hope you'll feel better soon.

Fixed. You don't condone using other people to help you get over someone else. That's fucked up and selfish. DATING IS NOT THERAPY.

This is why I tell people to take up new hobbies when going through a break up, or any sudden life event that's equally emotionally taxing. It helps keep you distracted and you learn new stuff.

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by Season
Yes, I've done that but honestly the best way to get over someone is to get really involved with something else that you enjoy. It works better, for me, than wallowing in so much pain.

Hugs. I hope you'll feel better soon.

Fixed. You don't condone using other people to help you get over someone else. That's fucked up and selfish. DATING IS NOT THERAPY.

This is why I tell people to take up new hobbies when going through a break up, or any sudden life event that's equally emotionally taxing. It helps keep you distracted and you learn new stuff.

click to expand

I haven't been talking to other people actually. I started running again and going to the gym which I think is why its been easy to get over it. I just can't stop reminding myself of him. It hurts but at the same time I feel like it'll help me move past it.

Posted by libralotus

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by Season
Yes, I've done that but honestly the best way to get over someone is to get really involved with something else that you enjoy. It works better, for me, than wallowing in so much pain.

Hugs. I hope you'll feel better soon.

Fixed. You don't condone using other people to help you get over someone else. That's fucked up and selfish. DATING IS NOT THERAPY.

This is why I tell people to take up new hobbies when going through a break up, or any sudden life event that's equally emotionally taxing. It helps keep you distracted and you learn new stuff.

I haven't been talking to other people actually. I started running again and going to the gym which I think is why its been easy to get over it. I just can't stop reminding myself of him. It hurts but at the same time I feel like it'll help me move past it.

click to expand

Yeah, it sucks. It's just a matter of working through all those PITA emotions of it all. Once you get past it, it's like fuck yeah I'm good. Wtf was I fretting over?

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by libralotus

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by Season
Yes, I've done that but honestly the best way to get over someone is to get really involved with something else that you enjoy. It works better, for me, than wallowing in so much pain.

Hugs. I hope you'll feel better soon.

Fixed. You don't condone using other people to help you get over someone else. That's fucked up and selfish. DATING IS NOT THERAPY.

This is why I tell people to take up new hobbies when going through a break up, or any sudden life event that's equally emotionally taxing. It helps keep you distracted and you learn new stuff.

I haven't been talking to other people actually. I started running again and going to the gym which I think is why its been easy to get over it. I just can't stop reminding myself of him. It hurts but at the same time I feel like it'll help me move past it.

Yeah, it sucks. It's just a matter of working through all those PITA emotions of it all. Once you get past it, it's like fuck yeah I'm good. Wtf was I fretting over?

click to expand

I'm just the worst, ABSOLUTE WORST at letting people go. It could have a lot to do with my abandonment issues but I just suck at it.

Posted by libralotus

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by libralotus

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by Season
Yes, I've done that but honestly the best way to get over someone is to get really involved with something else that you enjoy. It works better, for me, than wallowing in so much pain.

Hugs. I hope you'll feel better soon.

Fixed. You don't condone using other people to help you get over someone else. That's fucked up and selfish. DATING IS NOT THERAPY.

This is why I tell people to take up new hobbies when going through a break up, or any sudden life event that's equally emotionally taxing. It helps keep you distracted and you learn new stuff.

I haven't been talking to other people actually. I started running again and going to the gym which I think is why its been easy to get over it. I just can't stop reminding myself of him. It hurts but at the same time I feel like it'll help me move past it.

Yeah, it sucks. It's just a matter of working through all those PITA emotions of it all. Once you get past it, it's like fuck yeah I'm good. Wtf was I fretting over?

I'm just the worst, ABSOLUTE WORST at letting people go. It could have a lot to do with my abandonment issues but I just suck at it.

click to expand

Understandable, but dwelling does not help the one bit. I get it though because I've got a fixed venus and I'm always battling that stupid shit in situations like this. I know I'll get there, but I work through the bs. Once I'm on the other side, I'm done.

Dwelling and wistfulness for the false individual you're trying to purge doesn't help though. Get your logical side to kick you in the ass whenever the gooey, emotional side starts to derail you.

Posted by libralotus
I have been on and off with a cancer guy most of this year. We get together for a couple weeks and I become really invested. He eventually calls it quits and the cycle repeats. I actually feel stupid for believing that he genuinely wants to be together but he's usually so convincing. I'm not sure if this past "break up" is for good or not, but as soon as he wanted out I didn't beg to make it work for the first time. I let him leave and haven't spoken to him in almost two weeks.

Anyways, I'm not sure if this is effective or not but sometimes I wallow in the person I've been hurt by. I listen to songs that remind me of them or check their facebook occasionally. I feel like being reminded of being hurt will eventually force myself to move on instead of just trying to forget about it.

Not sure if I'm making any sense but if I am, does anyone else do this?

Fuck that pussy Pisces you are beautiful! IF that dumb ass fish can't recognize a good thing dismiss him. Are you water dominant?

Sometimes. I eventually get bored and move on.