Help with an annoying coworker situation

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carbonscorp
@carbonscorp
8 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 32 · Topics: 7
We joined the company at the same time, along with a bunch of other people. Initially we were friends, as everyone was - we were all new and trying to find our ground. We were fairly close, sharing our experiences at work, mostly frustrations.... After a while, I realized I didn't enjoy her friendship anymore because she began to exhibit a very offensive personality and give off a very shady vibe. For example, she would try to one-up me in front of our bosses and make me look bad...or try to anyway. Afterwards she would talk to me as if nothing had happened. After this happened a few times, I decided I had had enough and dropped the friendship, keeping her at arms length. I don't know if she was consciously aware of what she was doing..and I guess if I cared enough about our friendship I would've talked to her about it. But by that point I was angry and didn't care. So we just drifted apart and we're no longer friends.

My problem now is that whenever we attend the same staff meetings, she continues to make these quips to make me look bad. Sometimes they're valid points that I just didn't mention because I didn't think was necessary, and sometimes they're points that are self evident and I feel like she talks just for the sake of talking and put attention on herself? I just don't understand. It's very annoying and makes me want to slap her in the face. I wish she would just stop.

I've thought about why this makes me feel so bad. Part of it is I don't want to look bad in front of my bosses, which I don't think she succeeds in doing anyway...but there's always the fear. Also, I know it sounds bad to say this but, she's someone who has less credentials for this company than I have. To put it in perspective, I cried and became depressed when I got into this lower tier company, while she was exhilarated. I guess one can say she's trying hard to impress the higher ups, and I'm just like, whatever man... Don't get me wrong, I still respect my bosses and work hard but I just don't have the desire to kiss butt...not just because I'm in a lower tier company than I'm capable of, but because that's just not how I operate.

I'd really appreciate some advice on how to handle this situation. I know I can't make her stop...but how do I make myself feel less bad when this happens? Sometimes when she makes these quips, I will dish it back to make her look bad, but I don't enjoy doing that. And I hate that she makes me act in a way that's against who I naturally want to be.