Holding On

How tightly do you hold on to the past? Are you an "out with the old & in with the new" sort of person? Or does your past play a big role in your present and future? How often do you think of the past? Do you live inside your memories? Do you wish you didn't?

I do reflect now and then, but, only in the interest of learning from my past...I could never be hung up on my past...I believe in living in the present. So, I guess I am more out with the old and in with the new...
I have tried to see patterns (usually a pattern develops if a lesson goes unlearned) and tried to learn and grow!

Good stuff, Star! Thanks for your reply.

Myself, I live way too much in the past, but when absolutely necessary, I force myself to plow ahead. It is hard for me though...I want to stay in the happy times.

Are you saying things are not happy for you now Phoenix?

Well, it *could* be that whole grass is always greener thing, BUT, no, I have to be honest and say that somethings are just not right in my life at the moment. And then I compare it to happy memories I have (often relationship oriented) and I think of the opportunities missed, the mistakes made...etc. Yeah, I'm not entirely happy right now in my life by any means. But, I fake it for the sake of everyone around me! LOL (i'm so together, huh!)

By the way, dammit, I need to email you! And Luz, too! lol, I suck...

I did kinda wonder about the online thing and the boyfriend...like you are maybe searching for something more?? I don't know...

I hope things start becoming 'greener' soon!

Yes, you would be right in that evaluation Star. I don't even necessarily want the "romantic" online thing, just a good friend to talk to...lol, god I don't know. Thanks for your support chica!

I will say one thing, the guy I was talking to online, sought me out, from a public profile I had on MSN. Not a personal ad, just a profile...lol, and I almost didn't respond to him but he seemed normal, so I thought, what the hell...

yah, sometimes my past comes back to me but who doesnt think about their past at times, just depends where you take it from i guess.

Yeah. It's weird, when I was younger, I could pick up and move on and rarely ponder about what I could have or should have done...but when your peers all start getting married, and you're not, you start to wonder...and you start to panic...okay maybe that's just me...LOL.

well marriage stuff hasnt gotten to me yet but i'm sure it wont be THAT scary for me since i dont wanna get married till way later ROFL but i'm sure if i hit 46 or something then i'd be scared..