men vs women perception

women as perceived my men
polite - doormat
kind - weak
charming - gold digger
loving - needy
emotional - desperate
tears - needy/clingy
jealousy - insecure
marriage - agenda

men as perceived by women
polite - gentleman
kind - gentleman
charming - romantic
loving - romantic
emotional - sensitive
tears - down-to-earth
jealousy - security
marriage - commitment

same things for which a man is called prince charming, a woman is called drama queen. to some extent it is true that a woman wants to be pursued, and should be pursued. problem starts when she is given the green light by all the above said things, and starts responding in kind 🙂. i know some will argue that not everyone looks at them as negative traits (in women). but i am talking about when things start falling apart, when you start seeing the hot again cold again, when the disappearing, ignoring starts. i thing your positives start looking like your negatives and work against you.

Posted by everevolvingepithet
I think it's wiser to see people as more fluid or take their actions in the spirit of that moment as opposed to a rigid checklist, lest one be surprised at a later point lol

exactly, so when a woman receives love, attention, is pursued, she starts feeling more and more and starts doing same. then, she is pushed away. after a point, you start thinking, maybe i should not show emotion lest he thinks i am weak hehe 🙂

Posted by tiziani
Possibly because when things fall apart men look at her for who's standing right in front of him, whereas women often set their mind on hanging onto the image of who he could be. Polite, charming, gentleman... 50/50 as to when I've heard this being used by women as bang on the money reality, and other times just stuff of fairytale fantasy.

or more so how he was at the beginning. women think feelings can only grow and are not ready to let go of the initial romance.

Posted by tizianiI like kind and loving people, for the record.

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that's because you are a gentleman hehe, or so we think 😛

Posted by everevolvingepithet
I think it's wiser to see people as more fluid or take their actions in the spirit of that moment as opposed to a rigid checklist, lest one be surprised at a later point lol

virgos like to break things down and dissect hehehe. why did he smile at me? why is he talking to me huh, something's not right heheheh. i should act the opposite hahaha. and later, hmmm why isn't he smiling at me, not talking to me, something's definitely wrong.. hahahaha

I've seen men/women express all traits listed equally so to me its a crapshoot. Everybody has an agenda good or bad. It boils down to what's at the root of their intentions.

Posted by feby16aqua
Hello bsoul 🙂

Hey Febby aka Tiffany _??

Posted by feby16aqua
Tiffany lol. I love having so many names. 😛
Makes me feel so devilish!
How are you? 😄

Your real name is tiffinay?

Posted by feby16aqua
Tiffany lol. I love having so many names. 😛
Makes me feel so devilish!
How are you? 😄

If it makes you feel better... I have many adjectives on this site...also depending on the person _—lol. I'm good! How are you?

Posted by feby16aqua

Posted by beautifulsoul74

Posted by feby16aqua
Tiffany lol. I love having so many names. 😛
Makes me feel so devilish!
How are you? 😄

If it makes you feel better... I have many adjectives on this site...also depending on the person _—lol. I'm good! How are you?

No, it makes me feel worse 😛 I'm good! 😄

To answer the question, I think this applies for when the man is losing interest in the woman. It works both ways. A woman would feel the same way about a man if she was losing interest, at least that's how I am.
I've noticed sometimes that the more you distance yourself, the tighter the cling becomes. It's the loss of balance.
A healthy relationship can even teeter totter in this type of dynamic, but there must be balance always.

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At times I find this sentiment puzzling. It seems that the balance that the sexes go for is based more on tension rather than a peaceful harmony. Like in GCs thread for example. I'm not knocking anybody for their dating preferences but it seems like the overall balance is maintaining a balance between light and dark sides rather than pushing beyond that balance a recreating it on a more positive note.

In real terms, whatever happened to valuing and sexually responding or craving a man who nit only treats you with respect but is also a great father or something? At some point the spirit is like stop this tension I need peace lol! I guess I'm an old fart _—

Posted by BalmyTigress
Either I'm dumb or this is a cultural thing, but I just didn't understand any of this :-)

naah, this is a gender thing. how one comes across to the other. and i am not saying women should not be kind, loving, emotional, sensitive.. only the things we like in men can sometimes turn against us when we show them to men. esp. i am talking about later stages of a relationship, when almost always we hear women complaining about him getting distant, not liking her constant attention etc. etc. this is something we keep hearing on all relationship forums. that he does not take my calls, does not talk to me. i give him, show him soo much love blah blah. i have heard the term gold digger desparate, clingy, drama maker getting assigned to women, but never to many, esp. on these forums. it's just a general observation. women like intense emotions in men, men looks like take them as drama. maybe not all, but most. hell, even as i am typing this, i am beginning to think give me just normal, intense is too much to take haha.

Posted by memyself

Posted by BalmyTigress
Either I'm dumb or this is a cultural thing, but I just didn't understand any of this :-)

naah, this is a gender thing. how one comes across to the other. and i am not saying women should not be kind, loving, emotional, sensitive.. only the things we like in men can sometimes turn against us when we show them to men. esp. i am talking about later stages of a relationship, when almost always we hear women complaining about him getting distant, not liking her constant attention etc. etc. this is something we keep hearing on all relationship forums. that he does not take my calls, does not talk to me. i give him, show him soo much love blah blah. i have heard the term gold digger desparate, clingy, drama maker getting assigned to women, but never to many, esp. on these forums. it's just a general observation. women like intense emotions in men, men looks like take them as drama. maybe not all, but most. hell, even as i am typing this, i am beginning to think give me just normal, intense is too much to take haha.

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*men

Posted by tiziani
Isn't there some sort of saying for this that goes "a woman's worst fear is her husband will stay the same. A man's worst fear is that his wife will change."

Something like that.

i thought it was the other way round. a woman fearing her husband's feelings for her might change?

Posted by tiziani
In that case, add me to the confused section too because I don't know what the topic is here lol

haha. it's complicated 🙂. let's leave it at that. really, i am just reiterating on what we are seeing in all the posts here.