Is it hard to say I'm Sorry

Do Pisces find it hard to get over situations? For example a disagreement/fight. Not enough to end a friendship or a relationship but enough to distance themselves for a bit (days or maybe even a week) or make something small really dramatic? Is it hard to admit when they are wrong or say "I am sorry"? Instead of saying they are sorry do they tend to turn the tables when they are wrong and make themselves out to be the victim some way or another? I know it might not be a Pisces trait but more of a personality trait...just wondering. Thanks for your input. Have a great day!

I'm a very fast decision maker. I get in fast and get out fast. Therefore, no, it's not that hard to say sorry. But after I say sorry, it's really sory, and you will probably never see me again.

Hope you don't mind my interjection - I am not a Pisces Sun - Pisces in Venus though 😉
*that was a great song btw, Venus 🙂

Okies.....I read these posts about the difficulties in relationships and yes, we all have them and will continue to have them unless we choose differently. I wonder....we are born, we are living...and then, we die ( I prefer to say, transistion) moving onward to the unknown. This leaves us with reflecting on how our time here is soooo very valuable. What are we going to do with our time, how are we going to interact with another person so that we feel good about ourselves? What is worth holding onto and what needs to be let go of. Why are we here? are we here to cause pain for another person or to bring them love?

I can only speak personally from my heart that I came here to Planet Earth to have Fun! To enjoy every second that I am here doing what I love. It truly is up to each one of us as to how we choose to create our life while visiting this awesome place and what a privilege it is to be here (not everyone makes the cut).

I know we all have issues, at least someone said we all do - hmmmmm....maybe we don't. Maybe we each are perfect just the way we are and if we feel we need to change something about ourself, we can. Yahooo...how cool is that? Maybe we came here to learn how to appreciate who we are, to enjoy our moments, to be happy and to know love. Maybe life is a bit more simple than we give it credit for.

I am in a thought provoking mood today...must be the rain 😉

"I'm a very fast decision maker. I get in fast and get out fast."

Beep...Beeep Roadrunner lol 😉

"I'm a very fast decision maker. I get in fast and get out fast."

What if love is involved? Frienship or Relationship, you would still be gone?

"I'm a very fast decision maker. I get in fast and get out fast."

Maybe Haffo is sharing with us how he partakes in a sexual endeavor~

"What if love is involved? Frienship or Relationship, you would still be gone?"

Yes.

lv24 .. maybe this will shed some light ..

As other posters have said, it's easy to say we're sorry if we erred and to move on to get past a situation .. however, the problem is understanding this mis-understanding as it pertains to the Pisces.

In a relationship "something" happens and the two people have thier dispute, one person is at fault, or perhaps, both or neither are .. they come to terms. One person apologizes, if appropriate and then the two people move past this "issue" so they can carry on with relating. Then, there's the Pisces feelings .. which is a different story.

Let me give an example: I can have a dispute, apologize for my participation if I erred and to the other person .. it's over and done with. And the "issue" is over and done with that started the whole dispute .. but, NOT my feelings.

Until the other person understands that this wasn't just a "thing" .. it was also how it "felt" and those feelings have to be nurtured. Say, during this dispute, words were said to injure the feelings? Ok, so the issue is settled, but, those injured feelings still exist.

Sometimes, long after an arguement, when the other person has long forgotten that there was even a problem .. my emotions are still fragile about what was said during this arguement, the tone used, the unspoken induendos .. and not having a partner acknowledging these feelings and thinking the issue is over, may cause the Pisces to appear as though they are lingering on an issue that's over .. when in reality, we are still devastated by the events of the arguement and not the disagreement, itself.

"Beep...Beeep Roadrunner lol "

😉

*Gives some wheat seeds to freebird with hands

Yes, I feed them with my own hands.

"Let me give an example: I can have a dispute, apologize for my participation if I erred and to the other person .. it's over and done with. And the "issue" is over and done with that started the whole dispute .. but, NOT my feelings.

Until the other person understands that this wasn't just a "thing" .. it was also how it "felt" and those feelings have to be nurtured. Say, during this dispute, words were said to injure the feelings? Ok, so the issue is settled, but, those injured feelings still exist."

Hi P 🙂

With your above comment I am wondering...you say, the issue is done and over with...but, not your feelings. Then it would be you that is holding onto the "feelings" - perhaps you are keeping them alive and attaching them to the other person rather than letting them go. This is what causes resentment within...it really is not about the "other" person...it is about forgiving totally and letting go so that one can move on don't you think?

"Until the other person understands that this just wasn't a "thing".." maybe they cannot understand from your perspective because they are not you. We each come from a different world according to our beliefs so would this not be a great opportunity to accept and forgive the differences in another? What I have learned is that in each moment, each person is doing the best that they personally can from where they are emotionally. This brings compassion and understanding to the relationship.

I'd like to know why Pisces....I'm sure not all do but....choose to hold onto the past situations? How does this benefit you?

p-angel

I think you just put everything into perspective for me. It seems that this is exactly what is going on. Your explanation made it seem as if though you know of my entire situation....lol! Thanks. So how long does it take for these feelings to mend. Geeze! Disturbing words were said from both parties (not extremly disturbing just the normal things that are said in an argument)? Its funny because I am completly over it and it only took me 24 hours. Lol! His feelings seem to still be hurt (3days later).

"*Gives some wheat seeds to freebird with hands"

You, Mr. Haffo have captured my little birdie heart...wheat seeds are my mostest favorite - how did you know? 😉

Good question Freebird 🙂

I have a Pisces girlfriend who I have known for many years....we talk about this sort of thing...she does have a very hard time of letting go of her past situations and for the life of me...I cannot figure out why she holds onto them....it only drives her mad!

I dunno.....just wondering - maybe she doesn't even know why?

They feed pigeons with wheat seeds here, so it's kinda common sense for me lol 😉

I should be the one dwelling on it but i accepted his apology and move on. why cant he accept that i accepted and move on as well? Silly!

Lucky Pigeons....they have touched the "hands of Haffo!"

It's not holding on, though, it probably appears this way. And it's not causing resentment. Some people, especially the Aries, can move past a situation the moment a person says their sorry and smiles .. that's it, it's over. Not everybody can do that. Some people's feelings go deeper than just an outside dispute. And this is what I mean.

These feelings aren't harbored against the other person, for we fully understand that these are our own weak and hurt feelings .. this is why we back off and go MIA for a short period of time, so we can nurture ourselves back.

I got the impression from lv24 that what she is saying is .. sorry was said, so why the hell can't it be over? To her, because she's a Ram, it was over instantly .. however, he's a Pisces and his feelings go much deeper and it takes longer to recover.

It would be a perfect world if everyone processed feelings the same, then we could all just get along perfectly ... but, we're all different.

"Then it would be you that is holding onto the "feelings" - perhaps you are keeping them alive and attaching them to the other person rather than letting them go. This is what causes resentment within...it really is not about the "other" person...it is about forgiving totally and letting go so that one can move on don't you think?"

I would agree with that IF we stayed and threw resentment in the other person's face so they will feel bad .. but, we don't do that. We require space, tons and tons of space, for this purpose. We realize that we are more sensitive than others and require longer to heal .. so, we seperate ourselves so we won't cause the other more upset.

"I should be the one dwelling on it but i accepted his apology and move on. why cant he accept that i accepted and move on as well? Silly!"

lv24, P-A is very good at sharing her/the Pisces pov so hopefully, she can shed some light upon your question....I wonder the same. For us Aries, it is easy to let go and forgive so for me, it is a bit difficult to understand what others are holding onto and why.

I must add .. I didn't mean for that to sound like the Pisces feelings go deeper than the Aries, rather, feelings over a dispute go deeper than just a disagreement. 🙂

"Lucky Pigeons....they have touched the "hands of Haffo!""

Never really. They all appear to be afraid of me lol.🙂

When I thought of birds, the first thing came to my minds was feeding them with wheat seeds just like it's done in outside. What can I say Freebird, you are easy to be pleased 😉

Words are "felt", not just heard and thought .. it just takes longer for us to recover, is all.

This is one bird who is not afraid of the Haffo.

easy to please?.....it's all a matter of perspective my dear 😉

"I should be the one dwelling on it but i accepted his apology and move on. why cant he accept that i accepted and move on as well? Silly!"


He can accept it lv24 .. he just needs more time. Believe me, all of Pisces WISH we could just turn the other cheek so quickly, but, we just can't because everything that happened during this dispute hurts like hell .. every tone, every furrow of the eyebrow, hand motions, stomping about the room .. for the Pisces, it's NOT just the disagreement we have to heal from .. it's whole ordeal .. and we need longer.

Don't worry .. he'lll be back to his normal loving self 🙂

I get it. Its just so frustrating (pulling hair out). I just feel like I never win...whether i am the one doing wrong or he is the one doing wrong i am the one that is always be shut out. I just feel like every time our relationship takes a step forward a small dispute can push us 10 steps back because of the amount of time it takes him to recover even when he is the one at fault.

or i find when he is at fault he somehow is able to make me feel like i am the one at fault because of his sadness. reverse psychology!!! lol! Anyhow thanks guys 🙂

"Words are "felt", not just heard and thought .. it just takes longer for us to recover, is all."

P...hope you don't mind me asking you questions because it is helping me to understand my Pisces friend tooooooo!

I so agree that words are felt - I "feel" them too. But, what are you "recovering" from?

I can relate, lv24 .. I know I'm the same way and I can only imagine how hard it is on my partners to have to deal with this. Sorry for our kind making you feel this way.

In the future, maybe trying do this: When you become aware that this situation might arise, just pull him into your arms, fill him full of loving hugs and kisses and tell him that no matter what happens (problems), you just love him to death and will always be here holding him for it. By doing this, it might not get to the point of where you are in the wrong.

You want to know what you're in the wrong for? It's for not being sensitive to his feelings. The issue that started the argument is over for him, just like it was for you .. now, the problem is that his feelings are hurt and you are still going on about the conflict and saying that it's over, so what's the problem .. the problem is his feelings .. so, once a dispute is over, try nurturing his feelings BEFORE they become an issue.

It works for me .. maybe it will work for him. If my partner holds me close the moment an issue is over .. then, I never get to the point to where my hurt feelings become overwhelming.

"But, what are you "recovering" from?"

Recovering from the hurt words, FB .. most people, such as an Aries, for example ..

Let's say, during an arguement, your partner says to you, "You're being mean" .. you have the ability to just blow this off, it's anger talking .. you KNOW you're not a mean person and you know that what is being said during an arguement has nothing to do with being a mean person.

If you say to a Pisces during an argument, "You're being mean" .. we can't just blow that off, eventhough we KNOW we aren't a mean person. In fact, we could actually believe we are a nice person, but, those words fell from your mouth .. and we will absorb everything you say, everything you do during an argument .. they won't just be blown off .. so, it's stuff like that that we have to recover from. And we know it's just us being silly, so, we will remove ourselves from you, so you won't have to endure.

saying sorry is hard for me.
i have to think about it for a long time,to get myself together and say it.i have this rigidity in my nature.which makes me stubborn and unable to see my faults sometimes.
something i have to work on real hard.

Would it be correct for me to then say that a Pisces takes things personally where an Aries does not? Therefore, this is why it is easier for us to "let go" it is our knowing that what the other person has said to us, truly has to do with them and not us where the Pisces feel that it is them?

"i have this rigidity in my nature.which makes me stubborn and unable to see my faults sometimes."

Ah...DTN, this is your self talk, your truth because you have chosen to take on this belief. It is not in your nature unless you choose for it to be there. You can change your thoughts about that and create something different. It is within your mind to do so unless you choose to limit the use of your mind.

The cool thing about this stuff is....once we become "aware" of what we need to work on, the change begins to happen 😉

yeah i understand what you are trying to say.



i sometimes think i have an ego problem.

don't we all at times?

This is what makes it fun being here! (on the planet 😉)

hmm yes.
compromise

Please dont take this the wrong way because I think Pisces and men are great! But after much thought. I am begining to think that dating a Pisces is too much work for me. It is emotionally draining. I just want to keep moving and not look back. Over come obstacles and keep on trucking. Why the rollercoaster every time something out of the norm occurs. Get past it and move forward. I love my current partner but geeze!!! I am losing myself trying to constanly mend things, things that i didnt create. I always see people posting messages about the Pisces and Aries combination and it always seems that after a few months they post another message talking about how it didnt work out. I am begining to this is not a good combination and it makes me sad because i want it to be.

the thought of giving up makes me sad...aries dont give up that easily 😢

P-Angel, you nailed it with this:

Let me give an example: I can have a dispute, apologize for my participation if I erred and to the other person .. it's over and done with. And the "issue" is over and done with that started the whole dispute .. but, NOT my feelings.

Until the other person understands that this wasn't just a "thing" .. it was also how it "felt" and those feelings have to be nurtured. Say, during this dispute, words were said to injure the feelings? Ok, so the issue is settled, but, those injured feelings still exist.


I forgive. I try to forget. But I still feel the pain and sometimes that pain creates walls that I'd rather not have erected - but can't manage to fully tear-down, either.

Does this happen to you or anyone else? If so, how to remedy it?

lv,

Maybe his water is drowning your fire?

"I want it to be." I know you do...this means he would need to change. He would need to be someone different than what he is for this relationship to feel good to you. I think your instincts are wise, listen to them.

When you are in the right relationship, it is fun and it feels good 😉

Best wishes to you lv!

Thanks Freebird :0
People dont change 😢 especailly when i think he needs to and he thinks i need to. Only time will tell. I dont want to make any rash decisions that i am going to regret later so i am going to have to sleep on it for a few days. thanks.

Well, I don't think that Pisces is all that much extra work, of course, I'm biased, right?

Just like the Aries, for example .. they require a ton of adoration. They need to be constantly told how great they are. I'm not faulting this, rather, just saying that every person has extra needs.

So, perhaps, having to give the Pisces extra hugs and comfort after an argument is draining, but, it's a requirement .. and if you feel that you can't handle this, then it probably is the right thing for you to give this combo a rest .. cause the Fish isn't going to change. We have to have this kind of reassurance, just as the Ram has to have a lot of attention and affection .. it just is. 🙂

However it works out lv24, I hope you don't walk away with a bad taste with the Pisces and if the day ever arises that you're attracted to another that you give us another go.

"I forgive. I try to forget. But I still feel the pain and sometimes that pain creates walls that I'd rather not have erected - but can't manage to fully tear-down, either.

Does this happen to you or anyone else? If so, how to remedy it?"


Hey MNF .. yeah, this happens to me. Usually, forgiving is easy. I know full well in my heart that things are said during a heated fight that neither party meant .. but, to be able to overcome with some lingering pain is very difficult and then if something similiar arises in the future, the pain comes flooding back ten-fold.