Pisces Men!?! Help a sister OUT

So,I met a pisces not too long ago... We had fun... Typical pisces charmer. He told me I was amazing and "different" and in his words... "We are going to be good, I can see it now"...

Side eye.

He wanted to take me on a trip soon after I meet him, so he claimed but I was already going to DC for my sisters Bday.. So I declined.

Anyway, we continued to link up and hang out until he did something rude and I kind if backed away from him. He texts me after 3 days of no contact from me or him... And says " I miss you"... I cave and we slowly began talking again. One night I was to go see him after seeing him a week earlier and not really spending time... (I was with my girls, lol... But since I was in his city he came downtown to see me... Wanted me to stay but I couldn't leave my girls))

Anyway, I was to go see him and something happened to him that night... I don't know what but, next thing I know his mom is responding to my texts telling me she has his phone and he is in the hospital. About a week later she sends me a photo she took of him in the hospital saying that he was in a lot if pain... But, I took that as a sign that he wanted me know that he wasn't BSIng me... I responded and figured I would wait it out as we where only getting to know each other and I didn't want to constantly be talking to his mother... I didn't want to over step my boundaries basically.

He was injured in July, when he got better he texted me and I asked what happened he never responded to my question but kept the convo going...

In September I contacted him again hoping he'd be better. He said he was not, asking if I could come see him sometime and said sure when he was up for it... He would text me GM for a while and then that stopped... In October I was reminded of him and text him saying

Me: Hello Errone, remember me?
Him: Brooklyn, what's up Sexy?
Me: Just living life, just checking on you though.. Hope your better.
Him: I'm getting there, I go for my last surgery Oct 2nd... I haven't forgotten you... Think about you everyday. I was going to reach out once I got a little better. I haven't let you go. We're going to pick up where we left off when I heal up
Me: I figured that's what you where doing and there is no harm in that... Glad to hear you are healing well I just like to check from time to time if that's ok
Him: Always cutie, I'll be in touch.. I haven't let you go
Me: Whatever you like, I'd like that as well
Him: Cool I'm on it
Him: I'll be i

Him: I'll be in touch lil sexy

That was Sept 16th... My question?

What's up with dude? Is he really sick? Or has he healed and just is not interested? Why would he go through great lengths to assure me if he planned on doing nothing? Why did he have my number still saved when I texted him out of the blue? Does he really plan on coming back!?!

Pisces men? I like him... But I have kept my options open since his medical leave... Lol. What's up with him?

He is not interested.

No but in his hospital photo... He had a lot of tubes in his arm and one in his nose... It looked as though he had a catheter as well and bag for he urination... He looked messed up..

When he didn't respond to me asking what happened I took that as a q that he didn't want to discuss it with me..

If he's not interested... Why did he do all this?? He's had 2 surgeries his last was Oct 2nd... He seemed very into me before this happened.. I mean literally begging me to come see him the night it happened... I'm confused. Lol

I like him and I gave him space to heal. I hope he doesn't think I disappeared because I didn't care. We where kind of "new" you know? Didn't want to over step my boundaries as his new friend.

I don't get why you're confused. He's not in your life on a constant basis so he's not into you.

All his words are just...words.

You didn't mention what he did - the thing you considered rude.

The whole passage with his mother doesn't make any sense to me.

Furthermore...from July to October there wasn't any comunication going on.

His language is typical of a guy who wanted sex...and not much more.

Just my 2 cents..

djbuck1...I like Pisces..I just don't think he's interested.

And I think she's holding back a lot. Maybe he thought there was no connection there and drifted away

IM NOT A PISCES
I CAN,T IMAGEN WHY YOU WOULD WANT A PISCES
GO TO THE CAP BOARD THE FISHING IS BETTER THERE

Posted by Damnata
djbuck1...I like Pisces..I just don't think he's interested.

And I think she's holding back a lot. Maybe he thought there was no connection there and drifted away

You like pisces. You aren't a pisces. The point is... He was seriously injured and had to have 3 surgeries and a colostomy bag... So he was pretty messed up... We have communicated... It has just been short convo's which I'm not complaining because I know he's sick...

He's 32. He was telling his mom to call me and text me... But i just felt weird talking to his mother... We where so brand new... You know? If he doesn't like me that's cool to... I just don't see him trying to keep contact with someone he didn't like while going through all if this...
Hope he gets better though.

Posted by djbuck1

Posted by Nemesis

Posted by BadGalVirgo

Posted by Damnata
djbuck1...I like Pisces..I just don't think he's interested.

And I think she's holding back a lot. Maybe he thought there was no connection there and drifted away

You like pisces. You aren't a pisces. The point is... He was seriously injured and had to have 3 surgeries and a colostomy bag... So he was pretty messed up... We have communicated... It has just been short convo's which I'm not complaining because I know he's sick...

He's 32. He was telling his mom to call me and text me... But i just felt weird talking to his mother... We where so brand new... You know? If he doesn't like me that's cool to... I just don't see him trying to keep contact with someone he didn't like while going through all if this...
Hope he gets better though.

i'm not a dude (still a pisces though) 😄 so i??ll just say this - sick or not - why waste time? why tread on eggshells? both of you.

seize the moment.

Spirit Cat is right! 🙂

click to expand

+1 ——...

Dammit, OP, you should have insisted on seeing him if he proved that he was really in the hospital.

What is it with chicken shit people these days who fart around while people are in true need of support?

It's like watching an alcoholic attend AA meetings by himself.

Dammit, you should support him through regular contact. This telephone texting crap is as archaic as it is stupid.

Posted by ScorpioFish
Dammit, OP, you should have insisted on seeing him if he proved that he was really in the hospital.

What is it with chicken shit people these days who fart around while people are in true need of support?

It's like watching an alcoholic attend AA meetings by himself.

Dammit, you should support him through regular contact. This telephone texting crap is as archaic as it is stupid.

Is that what he wanted? You guys are so wishy washy... I never know what's right and what's not right.... I tried to keep contact light because I didn't really know him... And I didn't want smother him... Plus I knew he was very injured... I have reached out though... Does that count?

Last time we spoke was 9/16 when he told me about surgeries and how much he thought of me... He said he would be in touch and quit frankly I took that as "back off" only because I wasn't contacting him on the first place... Lol. Idk. I guess I'm not a pisces type. _—

Posted by BadGalVirgo

Posted by ScorpioFish
Dammit, OP, you should have insisted on seeing him if he proved that he was really in the hospital.

What is it with chicken shit people these days who fart around while people are in true need of support?

It's like watching an alcoholic attend AA meetings by himself.

Dammit, you should support him through regular contact. This telephone texting crap is as archaic as it is stupid.

Is that what he wanted? You guys are so wishy washy... I never know what's right and what's not right.... I tried to keep contact light because I didn't really know him... And I didn't want smother him... Plus I knew he was very injured... I have reached out though... Does that count?

click to expand

Dude, even if I barely knew someone, I would have still made at least one visit to check on the person.

I think you really need to stop playing with your phone, and go visit the guy.

Spending time with someone is the best way to put your money where your mouth is.

I cannot explain to you how much contempt I have for the idea of texting people instead of visiting them or spending time with them. It has totally corrupted society to the point where all basic forms of civility, decency and manners are lost arts.

Posted by ScorpioFish

Posted by BadGalVirgo

Posted by ScorpioFish
Dammit, OP, you should have insisted on seeing him if he proved that he was really in the hospital.

What is it with chicken shit people these days who fart around while people are in true need of support?

It's like watching an alcoholic attend AA meetings by himself.

Dammit, you should support him through regular contact. This telephone texting crap is as archaic as it is stupid.

Is that what he wanted? You guys are so wishy washy... I never know what's right and what's not right.... I tried to keep contact light because I didn't really know him... And I didn't want smother him... Plus I knew he was very injured... I have reached out though... Does that count?

Dude, even if I barely knew someone, I would have still made at least one visit to check on the person.

I think you really need to stop playing with your phone, and go visit the guy.

Spending time with someone is the best way to put your money where your mouth is.

I cannot explain to you how much contempt I have for the idea of texting people instead of visiting them or spending time with them. It has totally corrupted society to the point where all basic forms of civility, decency and manners are lost arts.

click to expand

You are so right. And I I'm terrible at it... But wouldn't I look pushy if I text him or called him when he told me "I'll be in touch".... You fish are so confusing!!! Lol... Maybe I should figure he has thrown in the towel and maybe I should to?

Sucks because I liked him. Think about him everyday. Still have his texts. ——... I keep telling myself delete them..

Posted by BadGalVirgo

Posted by ScorpioFish

Posted by BadGalVirgo

Posted by ScorpioFish
Dammit, OP, you should have insisted on seeing him if he proved that he was really in the hospital.

What is it with chicken shit people these days who fart around while people are in true need of support?

It's like watching an alcoholic attend AA meetings by himself.

Dammit, you should support him through regular contact. This telephone texting crap is as archaic as it is stupid.

Is that what he wanted? You guys are so wishy washy... I never know what's right and what's not right.... I tried to keep contact light because I didn't really know him... And I didn't want smother him... Plus I knew he was very injured... I have reached out though... Does that count?

Dude, even if I barely knew someone, I would have still made at least one visit to check on the person.

I think you really need to stop playing with your phone, and go visit the guy.

Spending time with someone is the best way to put your money where your mouth is.

I cannot explain to you how much contempt I have for the idea of texting people instead of visiting them or spending time with them. It has totally corrupted society to the point where all basic forms of civility, decency and manners are lost arts.

You are so right. And I I'm terrible at it... But wouldn't I look pushy if I text him or called him when he told me "I'll be in touch".... You fish are so confusing!!! Lol... Maybe I should figure he has thrown in the towel and maybe I should to?

Sucks because I liked him. Think about him everyday. Still have his texts. ——... I keep telling myself delete them..

click to expand

Dude, here.

1.) Call him. If he answers, tell him that you want to visit with him and bring him some flowers to help with his recovery. If he doesn't answer the phone, then leave him a voicemail and tell him that you want to see him and spend time with him.

2.) If he responds positive to this idea, then get your shit together and spend time with him.

3.) If he responds negatively to this idea, then let him go and get on with your life.

Sheesh, we Pisceans ar

Sheesh, we Pisceans are not that difficult to care for. You just have to put forth a concerted effort to spend time with us when we need it most, and time in the hospital and stuff like that is CLEARLY a time when it is needed most.

Posted by ScorpioFish

Posted by BadGalVirgo

Posted by ScorpioFish
Dammit, OP, you should have insisted on seeing him if he proved that he was really in the hospital.

What is it with chicken shit people these days who fart around while people are in true need of support?

It's like watching an alcoholic attend AA meetings by himself.

Dammit, you should support him through regular contact. This telephone texting crap is as archaic as it is stupid.

Is that what he wanted? You guys are so wishy washy... I never know what's right and what's not right.... I tried to keep contact light because I didn't really know him... And I didn't want smother him... Plus I knew he was very injured... I have reached out though... Does that count?

Dude, even if I barely knew someone, I would have still made at least one visit to check on the person.

I think you really need to stop playing with your phone, and go visit the guy.

Spending time with someone is the best way to put your money where your mouth is.

I cannot explain to you how much contempt I have for the idea of texting people instead of visiting them or spending time with them. It has totally corrupted society to the point where all basic forms of civility, decency and manners are lost arts.

click to expand

I agree with ScorpioFish. If I were you; I would go see him. That will answer some of the questions you have. It's better knowing than assuming or trying to come up with reasons why. That will also show that you care

Posted by LadyOfRebirth

It's not just a Pisces thing though. Serious illness takes a huge toll on your life and it doesn't really allow any time for other people in the life of the person that's ill. Haven't been seriously injured myself but I've seen a lot working as a caretaker

^^Truth! To be in that kind of shape with someone around you that you don't know is just weird. I don't even like to tell anyone I do know I have a cold.😢 It's what buck says..a privacy thing.

Posted by BadGalVirgo
Last time we spoke was 9/16 when he told me about surgeries and how much he thought of me... He said he would be in touch and quit frankly I took that as "back off" only because I wasn't contacting him on the first place... Lol. Idk. I guess I'm not a pisces type. _—

You did the right thing. If he wanted you there he would tell you straight up.

I agree with LetItB. Don't just APPEAR in his hospital room. Call him first, tell him you want to see him because you miss him. Ask him if he needs any help with his recovery. He may be very self conscious about his state, so that's why he probably doesn't want you to see him that way.

Truth is, you couldn't have appeared at a worst time, though. Think about the real possibility of dating a ill, or God forbid, even crippled person. Is this something you would want to do? You may be smitten with him now, but think about it really good. He will need support, and you two guys barely hooked up. You didn't even go through the honeymoon period (which basically means lots of sex, and lots of lying around doing nothing, except bask in the other person's presence). Do you think you could make sacrifices for someone who you barely know? You may be tempted to do it at first, but you will most likely become frustrated with it soon, and you'll probably leave him when he will need you the most. So don't do something like that. If you don't think you can do it, it would be better to let it go now, before some feelings will be developed, or some trust assumed. It may sound like a cold and awful advice, but if you're not prepared to commit fully, it's the only good thing you can do.

Of course, his condition could be completely curable, and your wait could be repayed in full. That's why it's probably better to call him up and ask him. Or ask to visit him, and ascertain the situation. Or, as a last resort, call his mom, and ask her seriously what's wrong.

Posted by Treplev
I agree with LetItB. Don't just APPEAR in his hospital room. Call him first, tell him you want to see him because you miss him. Ask him if he needs any help with his recovery. He may be very self conscious about his state, so that's why he probably doesn't want you to see him that way.

Truth is, you couldn't have appeared at a worst time, though. Think about the real possibility of dating a ill, or God forbid, even crippled person. Is this something you would want to do? You may be smitten with him now, but think about it really good. He will need support, and you two guys barely hooked up. You didn't even go through the honeymoon period (which basically means lots of sex, and lots of lying around doing nothing, except bask in the other person's presence). Do you think you could make sacrifices for someone who you barely know? You may be tempted to do it at first, but you will most likely become frustrated with it soon, and you'll probably leave him when he will need you the most. So don't do something like that. If you don't think you can do it, it would be better to let it go now, before some feelings will be developed, or some trust assumed. It may sound like a cold and awful advice, but if you're not prepared to commit fully, it's the only good thing you can do.

Of course, his condition could be completely curable, and your wait could be repayed in full. That's why it's probably better to call him up and ask him. Or ask to visit him, and ascertain the situation. Or, as a last resort, call his mom, and ask her seriously what's wrong.

+1.... I'm going to wait it out. I think he doesn't want me to see him like that... That's why he said I was going to reach out once I was completely healed. I figure this is the time for me to prepare myself for him as well...

I reach out every now and again to let him know I'm here. I hope he knows I'm here... He said he will heal in a couple of months... So we shall seeee

Posted by ScorpioFish
Sheesh, we Pisceans are not that difficult to care for. You just have to put forth a concerted effort to spend time with us when we need it most

I concur. Effort in general goes a long way.

Ah you're a cap moon. I feel like you guys will not quite get a pisces at first and vice versa. idk if he really doesnt feel like you give too many fucks he will prolly feel the same about you. I think you should be there a little more than you have been. You guys havent talked in two months? :/ Nows the time before it really gets too late.

Posted by BadGalVirgo

+1.... I'm going to wait it out. I think he doesn't want me to see him like that... That's why he said I was going to reach out once I was completely healed. I figure this is the time for me to prepare myself for him as well...

I reach out every now and again to let him know I'm here. I hope he knows I'm here... He said he will heal in a couple of months... So we shall seeee

Can you clarify how many times total you've hung out with this guy prior to the accident. Were any of those times actual dates? The way I read your OP, is you don't the guy that well yet.

Posted by cornfuzzled4ever


But if that were the case, he wouldn't have sent you a picture of him that first night. Right?

mmmhm

I think that "reaching out every now and then" is too little. It's too passive an approach, and it will make your relationship with him to become stale, and then, when he does get out, there won't be very much left to work on. If you truly want him, you should be more present in his life, especially at a time like this. Call him up, tell him you are concerned, or text him more often. Hell, when i'm with a girl i like, and there's something between us, we text each other up to 10 times a day. I imagine if i were to be in such a situation as your guy, those texts would probably be the only thing that would make it easier to bear.

Insist to go see him. Even if he's gonna be self conscious at first, he'll soon get used to your presence, and it will be the highpoint of his day. Having a girl you just met, someone who has been a complete stranger up until a few months ago, sacrifice a couple of hours of her time to come see you at your worst, is one of the best feelings ever. Great romances can evolve from such a start. He's in an exceptional situation, so you need to act somewhat exceptionally, in order to get to him. Right now, you're treating a life-threatening condition, like a few months' trip abroad. That won't turn any heads, much less open hearts. Don't be afraid to take that chance, if you're sure you want him. But only if you're sure. Don't forget what i said earlier about the seriousness of such a commitment. At least, for Pete's sake, try to find out what is he suffering of.

Posted by LetltB

Posted by BadGalVirgo

+1.... I'm going to wait it out. I think he doesn't want me to see him like that... That's why he said I was going to reach out once I was completely healed. I figure this is the time for me to prepare myself for him as well...

I reach out every now and again to let him know I'm here. I hope he knows I'm here... He said he will heal in a couple of months... So we shall seeee

Can you clarify how many times total you've hung out with this guy prior to the accident. Were any of those times actual dates? The way I read your OP, is you don't the guy that well yet.

click to expand

Sure, I met him in may... Remember because shortly after it was basketball playoff season. Our first date he took me out to dinner... We had a great time... 2nd time we hung, he cooked for me and we watch the NBA Finals.... We bet each other the entire playoff season... The heat won, so I won. LoL. He said he like me and how beautiful I was... I made him laugh and seemed very surprised by that. We went to the movies once and saw Jackass 2... We've had maybe 4 dates and 4 house visits all his idea... Every time I came to his house he would cook for me ——

Then the exact night of the championship he invited me to his home, but upon my arrival said he had to pick up his son last minute because the child's mother wanted to go out or whatever... I live in a town away so I explained to him that that was very rude and he was making me miss the championship!! I was pissed... He could have told me before I came... He basically saw I was upset and ended up performing oral sex on me after some persuasion... Lol. Bad, I know.

I was still pissed. I felt he wanted sex and when he didn't get he made something up... Idk. So I began ignoring him for 3 days... Frankly, I was finished. He didn't contact me either for the 3 days. Which was not like him because he would text And call me constantly!!! Anyway, he caves and texted me he missed me... I thanked him but didn't say I missed him back.

He has a player vibe though. That is why I'm weary... I went to his town to hang with some friends and as soon as he found out he came to me... Watching me in the club until one of my girls was like "That guy has been watching you for the longest" I look over and it's Mr. pisces...

He would often do this. Watch me from afar when we would go out... Not telling me he had arrived or coming to where I was... Weird!?! He would tell me too... I was watching you before I came over.

Anyway that night he wanted me to leave the club and spend the night with him, but I drove and couldn't ditch my girls. The next night I was suppose to come see him... And his injury happened.... Next thing I know his mother is texting me....

You guys have me thinking... Should I text him now?

I'm gonna do IT!! You Guys have me hyped!!! What should I say.... OMG!! I'm so nervous...What if he gets angry?

Just be you.
Did you doooo it?

Well, you're certainly right about the player vibe. I got the same feelings from the conversation you showed us in the first post. I'm sure he's been around. But hey, look at the bright side: ex players sometimes make the best husbands. And maibe the unfortunate thing that happened to him made him change his ways 😄

Just be chill, and don't try to invent things. Just tell him what you have been telling us. You convinced us you really like him.

Posted by AfternoonDelights22
Just be you.
Did you doooo it?

lol

No I wigged out _—... You guys are so intimidating to me... Only because I don't understand... And, as a Virgo with a lot if AIR... I'm so use to just getting people

Of*

Posted by BadGalVirgo
No I wigged out _—... You guys are so intimidating to me... Only because I don't understand... And, as a Virgo with a lot if AIR... I'm so use to just getting people

With the prolonged period of no contact I'd have said yep, doesn't sound that interested. However, he has been in hospital and from what you've said (multiple surgeries etc.) it sounds as though he was in pretty bad shape.

Maybe his last surgery didn't go so well and his recovery time is taking longer or perhaps he's not dealing well with the whole thing. ANyone who has been hospitalised for an extended period of time knows how utterly depressing it can be. Not to mention boring. Especially for someone who is usually very active. It can really get you down.

You've said you care about him and wish him well in recovery. Well show him that. Be there for him.

Pick up the phone and call him. Ask him if he's well enough for a visitor. He may well appreciate a cheery, and different, face.

There are two types of hospitalizations that he could have been undergoing:
-the heavy problem that implies he probably didn't want you to sse him like that,and required some time alone.
-the not so heavy problem that implies he was probably left wondering why you didn't inquire about his well being instead of playing the "why didn't he contact me first" game

Yeah, but i still don't understand what BadGalVirgo doesn't understand... I mean, we may be a bunch of fish here, but i really think we managed to be very clear on what we think she should do.
... right?...

Never said I didn't understand what you guys where saying... I'm saying as in the way you guys interact and what you expect... You guys are explaining it well... But, him not so much... Basically, if I didn't have this site I would be confused as ever...lol

I'm a Pisces moon here.
I prefer direct communication, and more personal like a phone call. Something is so impersonal and non-intimate about a text.

Seems like you care a great deal about him I'd make a phone call, if he doesn't answer leave a voice mail and know you did your part... if he doesn't respond I'd move on.

What's with the privacy weirdness? Do you expect someone to take your interest seriously when they can clearly distinguish the walls you're erecting?

Yes this does seem like what is going on. I dont understand why she doesnt go see him if she wants to. If she knows about this then why isnt she going to see him?