How long should a break last?

My ex and I parted ways recently due to life issues, a bit of depression and generally being in hate with himself. Seriously, I have never broken up while still having major feelings. He has hit a rough patch and decided to let me go. After all of that, my ex Scorpio love asked me for a bit of a break before resuming talking etc. I didn't know that friends took breaks but I respected him and now we are at the 30 day mark. He isn't big on communication so I will need to connect with him. My question is, how long before I check on him to see how he is? Anyone else ever deal with this?

So, it's been thirty days No Contact yes?
If you are feeling the urge I'd say that's been long enough to merit even a very casual check-in...
But, I'm not sure @_@

That's what I was thinking, guys.

Check on him. Be nice

Hm a break or separation is a big wtf slap. If someone suggests a break then do it otherwise you may set yourself up for failure or trial and errors experiences.

So if a break is to bind the creativity and see if they are the one or not then 1 month to take time to think about it, talk about and see what happened.

But don't ask the other if they slept with anyone else while you broke up to work out things in your relationship. Frankly if it has been a year and no changes, it's a no go and just detach fast.

You should write down a big list of really personal questions to ask him ....

and really lay it on, make him feel really smothered ... after all, that 's what you are thinking about. You sit there for a month with baited breath on pins and needles .. just waiting for him to throw you a bone.

so, if you're going to actually live the part ... then be a responsible and respectful adult and tell him the truth.


Considering that you ARE sitting there waiting for a guy who doesn't want you ...... I would wager that pathetic characteristic of yours is why he needs to get away from you to begin with.

People want an independent partner, who is capable of standing on their own ... not an insecure whiny woman, who is sitting by the phone, ready to lick his ass at a moments notice.


But, suit yourself ... lick away at his ass all day every day, if it makes you feel special to wear his shit on your face for all to see.

@Just that was a bit harsh ....... Scorpioluver just be direct and ask him if you need move on..... if you have already asked this and got your answer ... go with that. When folks say take a break that leaves a gray area IMO. 30 Days no contact .... leaves you pretty much waiting ..... and he may never come back... so to clear your mind and future ask him do you need to move on. He will tell you.

botta you are familiar with me. As you know, I am just concerned.

Concern and worry causes havoc on the emotions .... speaking from experience. Any questions should be expressed ... directly as possible at this point .... 30 days ? Yeah the floor of direct questions should now happen.... either yay or nay for closure

I am in that process of moving on. I don't want to reconnect other than friendship. This guy needs to be alone to work out his issues.

Thanks Botta

No problem.... always do what is emotionally best for you ........

Aries I would agree fully with what you've said as I am not one to keep in contact with ex's. This one went into a major depression and self loathing. He is still someone I care about on a friendly level as we have always been close. If my friends sink into a hatred for themselves, I don't check out on them.

Could it be someone else ? Seems fishy .... and depression is a beast ...... Are you sure you guys were truly happy completely because something seems off. I do remember you said he was scorpio with a taurus moon........ very romantic .... and can stay in a situation with a person for years even when they know it's something they truly don't want.... eventually it will tear at them and will cause depression, especially if he may have hard times in younger years..... but like a true scorpio they will cut something off with no warning ...... but in this case his warning could have been distancing himself....... I have a mars in scorpio ...... I get it because I will do the exact thing ..... sounds harsh but .... scorpio trait for me is seeing things in black or white when I come to that place ....... either it will work or it want ...... if it want ... I cut it slap off... my bew is the exact same way...... trust if he did break it off with you .... he may just have leverage to do so ...... to break something off like that ..... Ion know ... he has been keeping tabs on something he doesn't like ..... I hope it works out the way it should for you....... but even if he is a friend .... ya may need to cut the friendship out all together......... no gray area ....... I know I can't be friends with someone I was emotionally vested in .... that's just me though ..... hell no ..... either ya in or ya out .......... I know how it can be though ... been there with quite few men..... The question you should ask yourself ...... Is this situation emotionally draining you? I know as strong women we say we just want to help ....... but in all honesty ....... is it helping you .... and before you say "helping him ... helps you" Nah that ain't da answer......... You always help yourself first ... and if he a good guy ... he want would you to do just that instead keeping waiting ...... Just accept the reality in the situation ... (what you have been told, witnessed, gathered ) in this entire relationship ....... Has it been more bad than good .... now weigh that question carefully .....

Could it be someone else ? Seems fishy .... and depression is a beast ...... Are you sure you guys were truly happy completely because something seems off. I do remember you said he was scorpio with a taurus moon........ very romantic .... and can stay in a situation with a person for years even when they know it's something they truly don't want.... eventually it will tear at them and will cause depression, especially if he may have hard times in younger years..... but like a true scorpio they will cut something off with no warning ...... but in this case his warning could have been distancing himself....... I have a mars in scorpio ...... I get it because I will do the exact thing ..... sounds harsh but .... scorpio trait for me is seeing things in black or white when I come to that place ....... either it will work or it want ...... if it want ... I cut it slap off... my bew is the exact same way...... trust if he did break it off with you .... he may just have leverage to do so ...... to break something off like that ..... Ion know ... he has been keeping tabs on something he doesn't like ..... I hope it works out the way it should for you....... but even if he is a friend .... ya may need to cut the friendship out all together......... no gray area ....... I know I can't be friends with someone I was emotionally vested in .... that's just me though ..... hell no ..... either ya in or ya out .......... I know how it can be though ... been there with quite men..... The question you should ask yourself ...... Is this situation emotionally draining you? I know as strong women we say we just want to help ....... but in all honesty ....... is it helping you .... and before you say "helping him ... helps you" Nah that ain't da answer......... You always help yourself first ... and if he a good guy ... he want would you to do just that instead keeping waiting ...... Just accept the reality in the situation ... (what you have been told, witnessed, gathered ) in this entire relationship ....... Has it been more bad than good .... now weigh that question carefully .....

Botta, I'm not waiting on him. He broke up with me because he was returning home( moving away) due to family stuff and generally not being happy. I have no desire to recapture love. I haven't said a word to him in 5 weeks. When we broke up, he hugged me so hard that I couldn't breathe. I truly believe that he couldn't handle his life and he saw us as more added to his already busy plate. There is a lot more that I don't care to share but I do care about him as a person. He has major abandonment issues In matters of the heart. At this point, he can get in touch, I give up.