Candeh15
@Candeh15
15 Years1,000+ PostsVirgo
Comments: 5 · Posts: 4244 · Topics: 258
It's harder to let go
Yeah, I'm kind of experience that right now. Goodness, he just knows how to handle me in all the right ways. Excuse me while I go wallow in frustration, lol.
Oh hell yeah I can relate! lol
Sometimes we don't prioritize sex as much in the beginning b/c we're so afraid of it changing things. BUT, once we're "in there" & once things are official, sex can def. turn up the volume of things! Great sex can def. contribute to why you love/like your partner THAT much more than you would've persay the sex wasn't good.
I think the same rings true for partners that are extremely attractive. For some reason, it's harder to let an ex go if they were drop dead gorgeous vs. if they were just "ok" or "decent." I know there's psychology behind it, but I just can't figure out how it works!
I think it's harder to let go of someone who provided a great sex life for you b/c once we get it, we never want to let go of it. Hell, once we get a dose of anything "good" we never want to see it leave. But it's even worse with sex. If we lose the 1 person who actually/finally gave us the sex life of our dreams, it sucks b/c we know that no one will probably ever top that again! Yeah yeah, we can go settle for an F buddy who may have some "good dick" (excuse my french lol) BUT, it's not the same since there's no love/feelings involved.
I think this is why some people even still sleep with their ex's even after the relationship has ended. 1. They probably enjoyed the sex life anyways BUT 2. They feel that if they continue to sleep with that person that they'll atleast continue having a little piece of that person left vs. facing losing them altogether. Smh
Sometimes we don't prioritize sex as much in the beginning b/c we're so afraid of it changing things. BUT, once we're "in there" & once things are official, sex can def. turn up the volume of things! Great sex can def. contribute to why you love/like your partner THAT much more than you would've persay the sex wasn't good.
I think the same rings true for partners that are extremely attractive. For some reason, it's harder to let an ex go if they were drop dead gorgeous vs. if they were just "ok" or "decent." I know there's psychology behind it, but I just can't figure out how it works!
I think it's harder to let go of someone who provided a great sex life for you b/c once we get it, we never want to let go of it. Hell, once we get a dose of anything "good" we never want to see it leave. But it's even worse with sex. If we lose the 1 person who actually/finally gave us the sex life of our dreams, it sucks b/c we know that no one will probably ever top that again! Yeah yeah, we can go settle for an F buddy who may have some "good dick" (excuse my french lol) BUT, it's not the same since there's no love/feelings involved.
I think this is why some people even still sleep with their ex's even after the relationship has ended. 1. They probably enjoyed the sex life anyways BUT 2. They feel that if they continue to sleep with that person that they'll atleast continue having a little piece of that person left vs. facing losing them altogether. Smh
Even worse...it's always the guys that we can't really have at all OR atleast in the way we want em (relationship) that have the best sex! It's never the guys who are just "ok" or the guys we can live without! It's the guys we really really liked/loved that have the best sex! It seems like whenever we freakin' FINALLY find someone who can please us in all the right ways, that's when things end or don't end up being long term. And afterwards, we always end up stuck with the "next one" who can't top our ex's or even come close to what we experienced with the last person! UGH!
Well this is depressing.....I have just had to farewell the greatest sex ANYONE EVER had (he finally admitted there was no love involved and of course I am an Aries and stupidly believe that if I am good enough to treetrunk I am good enough to marry)(Not so it seems!!)(But maybe he was bullshitting me about enjoying the sex...)
And I now have stupid friends saying he's a loser and someone better will come along...my friends have all settled - they have given up on the great sex thing and married "Mr OK" - I thought I had found "Mr Great Friend and Lover"
does this mean I won't ever have the Great Sex again? it took sooooo long to find him.
Has ANYONE ever found great sex again, or do you only get one shot at it?
And I now have stupid friends saying he's a loser and someone better will come along...my friends have all settled - they have given up on the great sex thing and married "Mr OK" - I thought I had found "Mr Great Friend and Lover"
does this mean I won't ever have the Great Sex again? it took sooooo long to find him.
Has ANYONE ever found great sex again, or do you only get one shot at it?
Ha! Ohhh yeah, losing someone who had some "good stuff" makes us eventually realize how much we really DID prioritize sex over other things.
We may act like sex isn't as important in the very beginning b/c we don't to sound shallow or like we priorize the wrong things too much, but oh boy, we truly learn just how much certain things really mean to us once we lose them. And the same rings true for other things that we consider "great" too.
I'll tell you what, it teaches us how we REALLY work/tick. It teaches us just how important sex really was. But hey, the good thing is that eventually, we grow to realize that if ALL we have with someone is a great sex life, that it's probably not worth it! And that's usually what ends up happening. We lose our rights to that person's heart, emotions, life, etc. & yet we're stuck with just that 1 benefit most people are always willing to give us: SEX. And even though it'll ALWAYS be good (even after the breakup) we finally realize that it aint worth a shxt if the feelings/emotions aren't involved!
We let our priority on sex blind us sometimes. That person may have been a complete asshole, they may have cheated on us, abused us, taken us for granted or did the unthinkable. BUT if the sex was good, we'll rationalize in our heads why we should keep that person around, even though we know good & damn well we wouldn't even wanna look at that person again persay the sex was horrible & yet the relationship ended. Sad! lol
We may act like sex isn't as important in the very beginning b/c we don't to sound shallow or like we priorize the wrong things too much, but oh boy, we truly learn just how much certain things really mean to us once we lose them. And the same rings true for other things that we consider "great" too.
I'll tell you what, it teaches us how we REALLY work/tick. It teaches us just how important sex really was. But hey, the good thing is that eventually, we grow to realize that if ALL we have with someone is a great sex life, that it's probably not worth it! And that's usually what ends up happening. We lose our rights to that person's heart, emotions, life, etc. & yet we're stuck with just that 1 benefit most people are always willing to give us: SEX. And even though it'll ALWAYS be good (even after the breakup) we finally realize that it aint worth a shxt if the feelings/emotions aren't involved!
We let our priority on sex blind us sometimes. That person may have been a complete asshole, they may have cheated on us, abused us, taken us for granted or did the unthinkable. BUT if the sex was good, we'll rationalize in our heads why we should keep that person around, even though we know good & damn well we wouldn't even wanna look at that person again persay the sex was horrible & yet the relationship ended. Sad! lol
Sorry everyone if I sound shallow, but sex IS really important to me. So when it came with what felt like a great "friend" connection it was the icing on a really great cake.
Is this too much to expect? Am I being unrealistic?
Please be honest - truly I don't think I could feel much worse, so you won't be doing much damage!!!!
I read a lot about guys complaining that their wives aren't putting out or their "home life" isn't exciting....well those guys should either suffer in silence and stop complaining or grow some balls, get a divorce and marry a chick who is up for it.
Is this too much to expect? Am I being unrealistic?
Please be honest - truly I don't think I could feel much worse, so you won't be doing much damage!!!!
I read a lot about guys complaining that their wives aren't putting out or their "home life" isn't exciting....well those guys should either suffer in silence and stop complaining or grow some balls, get a divorce and marry a chick who is up for it.
Posted by ReallyNiceAriesPerson
Sorry everyone if I sound shallow, but sex IS really important to me. So when it came with what felt like a great "friend" connection it was the icing on a really great cake.
Is this too much to expect? Am I being unrealistic?
Please be honest - truly I don't think I could feel much worse, so you won't be doing much damage!!!!
I read a lot about guys complaining that their wives aren't putting out or their "home life" isn't exciting....well those guys should either suffer in silence and stop complaining or grow some balls, get a divorce and marry a chick who is up for it.
No, it's okay. Sex is also really important to me. I'm not going to front and say I can put it behind me. And it's not like I can't live without sex, but it's something I truly enjoy as well. The sex for me is like the icing on the cake; much of the intimacy comes outside of the sex, but I desire the sex too. Like, I'm not even going to pretend it's nothing to me lol.
alot of times in those same marriages, reallyNice, the guys have stopped "dating" their wives so the wives don't feel the same. He isn't doing anything special just for her, so why should she do anything special for him?
Good point you bring up - why doesn't the wife flip him the bird and a set of divorce papers and marry a guy that "does" it for her?
Why do they all want to remain stagnant in their nests making each other miserable? Oh dear, I think I got on this hobby horse a while ago on the "The One" thread. Getting off soapbox now.
Why do they all want to remain stagnant in their nests making each other miserable? Oh dear, I think I got on this hobby horse a while ago on the "The One" thread. Getting off soapbox now.
Haha 🙂
Been on & off with the Libra for like 7 years now
I don't really have to say anything else. 😛
Been on & off with the Libra for like 7 years now
I don't really have to say anything else. 😛
I really do feel like if I was in a marriage and there was NOTHING else holding me down (like the passion was gone, the intimacy was gone, there was no compassion between us, ect), then it's time to just leave. Especially if the sex was bad. At that point, you're kind of just making yourself into a fool, imo.
Posted by ReallyNiceAriesPerson
Good point you bring up - why doesn't the wife flip him the bird and a set of divorce papers and marry a guy that "does" it for her?
Why do they all want to remain stagnant in their nests making each other miserable? Oh dear, I think I got on this hobby horse a while ago on the "The One" thread. Getting off soapbox now.
I don't get this, sorry.
^^ sorry - didn't explain very well...
I meant if this fictional lady's husband wasn't making an effort for her, nothing to stop her from leaving his sorry butt on the couch and going out and marrying someone who does.
I meant if this fictional lady's husband wasn't making an effort for her, nothing to stop her from leaving his sorry butt on the couch and going out and marrying someone who does.
even after 9 years sex with my aries man its still the best. Now we just gotta work on communication and making time to talk not just have sex 😛
Posted by jules69
even after 9 years sex with my aries man its still the best. Now we just gotta work on communication and making time to talk not just have sex 😛
9 years? i thought a Cap woulda layed the smack down after the first year
Bad sex is a deal breaker for me, sorry but it is. The sex between me and my aqua is soooo good that I sometimes question if I really like him or if the sex is what has me glued to him. I literally get shivers when I think about the things we do.
No
No, even the best sex couldn't keep me. He has to have my heart.
Yeah... *sigh* but sometimes, we've got to let go of some good things in life.
If the personality sucks or the person had enough of us, we can't force them to stay, or we just have to say goodbye to their beautiful bedroom moves, all that licking and hip thrusting, and rubbing and stroking and 'phooaaa'' everything... but then again, the chances are, you can even meet someone better in the sex department or worse, yet wonderful at loving you.
If the personality sucks or the person had enough of us, we can't force them to stay, or we just have to say goodbye to their beautiful bedroom moves, all that licking and hip thrusting, and rubbing and stroking and 'phooaaa'' everything... but then again, the chances are, you can even meet someone better in the sex department or worse, yet wonderful at loving you.
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