When a date tells you he is sexual?

I met a great guy almost 2 weeks ago and we are dating (not bf and gf). We've been having a blast together! We last hung out friday and now its finals week for me and I work and Ive been crazy busy this week. Since I know we arent together and that he is chatting with someone else but not serious about it (he is brutally honest), I never really took him seriously because we havent gotten to the point where we are exclusive yet. So, I try not to smother him esp since hes is not my bf and its only been almost 3 weeks. But just yesterday he told me that he is finding it harder than he thought to balance talking to 2 people at the same time and that he wants me..."I like you and want to give you more effort." i told him basically that I like him too. He says "I just don't want to waste your time hun" I asked him why would he say that, "us not hanging out or talking as much..and I'm really sexual" I told him just dont rush it with me until youre ready he said youre right. Later that night, I asked him what made him say that he said "because we dont talk that much." I felt like I didnt want to smother him esp since I didnt think he was serious about me. I did text him mon-today but not a full conversation. He seems mad at me (im assuming).

++1 Dimplez

I have to cosign on what Dimplez said, basically he is saying to you either give me sex or he's pursuing the other woman more. Don't fall for his tactic to ignite desperation of losing him losing him so he can get what he wants which is sex, tell him to do what's best for him and let the chips fall where they may. If he like you way more as he claims he's not going anywhere for too long, he'll be back. The challenging woman is always on a mans radar.

@xdimplez-I agree. Our convo started out with me saying a funny good morning and he replied " lol morning miss. I was literally about to text you..apologizing for my distance from you" going to the "I like you and want to put more effort in with you." I just feel that since we arent together that I have no right to be possessive of him yet. But I feel that if I feel confused by anything he says that is SUPPOSED to be a compliment, then it is not sincere. Im going to move on. Im glad I realized this before getting closer to him. Thanks

Thanks guys! I think you all are right. He is always pretty good about responding back but yesterday he didnt. Even if it wasnt what we think it is. I can t be with someone like him. I would be miserable in a relationship with him.

On 12/12/12 you posted the below snippet on the Scorpio board .... which was the day before you made this thread ...

Posted by Burgundybrunette

I met a great Gemini guy almost 2 weeks ago and we have been hitting it off great.

The attraction between us is red hot! We went from not touching and having a stimulating convo to later passionately making out.

Am i doing the right thing to keep him around? What can I do to wrap him around my finger lol

According to what you said .... you are sexually teasing this man, if you are passionately making out with him, if you then stop him and have not given him the goods.

For him to talk to you about his sexual needs is NOT standing out as being a player IF you are arousing him ... and you ARE arousing him according to what you posted on the Scorpio board. So, it isn't any red flags whatsoever that he is merely responding to you according to signals you give him.

And last point ... if you are doing those things (sexually teasing him with the goods) to try and wrap him around your finger then that makes YOU the player.

Furthermore, I question your integrity ... considering you make this thread, attempting to persuade people that the two of you are just casual dates, who barely know each other, and attempt to make it sound like out of nowhere he is mentioning sex to you.


When in reality, according to what you said .... you two know each other well because you talked about how the two of you have common interests, and how around his birthday he opened up and told you very personal/private feelings. That means you aren't just some random date that he's been on with several times. It means that you are close to him.

You are putting your hot body next to his, and then coming in here telling a completely different story, trying to make people believe that he is being out of line in talking about his sexual needs.


So, for the fact that you attempt to decieve by this thread making you out to be a person other than who you are according to other threads ... I mistrust you ... you are deliberately being deceptive.

I was wrong .. I stand corrected by myself.


When you were talking about being close and him opening up on his birthday ... you were talking about your Scorpio boyfriend.


this guy you are referencing is a Gemini



But, still ..... you are guilty of arousing this man, and then withholding for intentions of wrapping him around your finger.

She IS the player, she got two guys on the burner. i feel sorry for all those people who were defending a woman's dignity there....lol...

Talk about red flags waving .......

Posted by Burgundybrunette

I just feel that since we arent together that I have no right to be possessive of him yet.

yet !!!

In other words, once you have him, you then think you have a right to ownership of him

NO, I posted as a scorpio woman referring to a scorpio man that I hadnt talked to in a while. So I moved on. Whats player-ish or deceptive about that when Im single. Am I supposed to wait for a man? I later met someone else who was a Gemini. The gemini man I am referring to I did passionately kiss (which was out of the ordinary for me). But I made that decision. The question was why would someone start off giving you what seemed to be something great to hear, then the next sentence is something confusing. Now I know why. I do regret the way this played out, I never said that I was the victim. I never said poor me. I simply asked about his behavior. I know my own. I have made mistakes in relationships-like Im sure you have- so dont try to make me out to be deceptive or a liar.

I dont think I have ownership over him, like your implying. I think that if you arent someones girlfriend that you dont have a right to play the girlfriend role. He doesnt have to report to me or have me telling him who and who not to talk to. The term being wrapped around someones finger is just an expression not to be taken seriously. Meaning I wanted him to like me back the way I liked him. Thats just my opinion. If you feel that Im hiding something I will gladly tell you the whole story, which is too long to type 🙂.

Either way, I ask these astrology things for fun, all is well, thanks for commenting and doing "detective work". I just wanted to ask another persons opinion because sometimes you dont see it when youre in it.

Thanks guys

Posted by xygeneration
It's either you hop on that and last like the energizer bunny..... or ignore him. Depends what you want. Although, guys that usually come off too horny aren't that satisfying in bed. They will release as fast as they got hard, so it would be a waste of your time. IMO

I literally spewed out my soda on that one!!! lmao!!!

Posted by QUlETstorm
From one scorpio woman to another,I actually think it's admirable that you allow yourself to have options. You are not tied down at this point, and you're not sleeping with either of the men, so you're not putting yourself at risk. Kudos to you! That's usually not easy for us to do with our tunnel vision.

As far as the gemini guy. Hmmmm. Generally speaking from experience, geminis are not a good match for us because of their fickle nature and our possessive nature. Unless you have a lot of air in your chart, I'm guessing the courtship would be a challenging one, to say the least. But nothing is absolute..

Gemini men like to be constantly challenged. That could be exhausting as well. Right now he is probably LOVING the fact that you tease him, but what happens when you give it up? There's a chance he will become bored once he has "conquered" you. I would just be careful with those geminis.

shit is sooo real

Fuck the drama you guys are talking about.
We are all options!
I know we all would like to think we should be #1, but there is competition out there.
So, bring your A game!

Posted by incandescentcancer
She IS the player, she got two guys on the burner. i feel sorry for all those people who were defending a woman's dignity there....lol...

Only 2?? She's not a player, she's testing the waters. Smh!

Babe he's trying to tell you to step your game up.

B/c you're not the only hot thing in town, he's being honest in that he's def. comparing you to the other woman. And although it may seem unfair or kinda cruel, it is what it is. A man is gonna go with whatever woman wins the competition for him, shows the most effort, etc.

However, he could just be trying to get in your pants. He might've only told you about the other woman, not for the sake of being honest, but b/c he knows women tend to flock harder to a man (and wanna please him) when they get confirmation that they're competiting for him.

Sound like he's being slightly manipulative in trying to guilty you into giving up the goods

And the reaction you're having right now is exactly what he wanted. Look at you! You're questioning yourself

If you're not ready for sex yet, then don't do it. And even though you not having sex with him may annoy him at times, don't EVER forget that if he was truly interested in you, he wouldn't go anywhere.

It'd be different if you were holding out on sex for years or something. Then it'd be like ok, he's a man, he can't take it much longer

But honey we're talking about less than a month here.

I get it, he's a man with a penis and with a sex drive. And it's only natural for him to want to bang the girl (or girl's) he's dealing with

But 1st thing's first, if you ever do give it up to him, it needs to be WHEN you 2 are exclusive AND when you are ready. If you start off sharing him in the beginning, you'll be setting the pace for what'll happen later persay you 2 do actually make it official

Something about this guy and his antics seems fishy. Don't ever question yourself. If you have to go slow b/c it makes you feel more comfortable, he needs to respect that. Doesn't have to like it, but respect it.

And if he doesn't like it and can't respect it, then there ya go. You'll know that his intentions were to get you into bed like alot of other guys. It's just that his game for getting the goods was a little different and alot less obvious as other guys