Are Bulls Known For Testing You? Or Is This Withdrawing?

So I just moved to the west coast and started working for this great new company. Unfortunately, I'm the type of person who is completely oblivious when someone is interested in me unless they just come right out and say it. This really hot and sweet coworker of mine apparently is/was interested in me but as I said I wasn't aware of his advances. He has a big personality and I thought he was just being friendly and wanted to make the new girl feel comfortable. He would ask about getting drinks but I declined (I was getting some furniture delivered), he would ask how he's favorite Sagittarius was doing.Later on he sent me a text asking if I was free for dinner but I never got the text, (he mentioned this to another coworker and that's how I found out).This is when my friend pointed out that he was interested. Between then I noticed he seemed a little distant. I sent him a text mentioning something about his favorite show and it took forever for him to respond to me and this happened a few more times. I sent him a text a week later (after I found out he contacted me about dinner) apologized for going missing in action and I was busy and how it would be nice to still see him. He was very nice about it and said no worries he understands life can get hectic and said what about later this week. I replied and said"yes that is good for me 🙂", then nothing. Silence. We work in different departments and I've been away at a conference so I haven't seen him. My girlfriends believe that he is testing me. I don't think he is though.

So testing, withdrawing, or done?

Thanks!

I don't see any testing, or interests really. Tread carefully. Where did you move from ? There are other options if it doesn't work no matter what.

I live in the west coast too, there's plenty of things to do out here btw.

So you are a Taurus and he is a Sagittarius male. Cool just see wait it out. Sagittarius and Taurus are very busy people and very flirty towards each other. This pairing will always be a good start in the beginning.

Or is it Sagittarius woman and Taurus man? This is probably different though. As a taurus woman to a Sagittarius man it is good friendships.

Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
I don't see any testing, or interests really. Tread carefully. Where did you move from ? There are other options if it doesn't work no matter what.

I live in the west coast too, there's plenty of things to do out here btw.

Well the only reason why I'm saying he's interested is because he mentioned to our coworker that was interested. I'm just confused why he would say about getting together later this week then go silent. I just moved from NC, I'm loving the west coast so far. Glad I made the move.

Sagittarius and Taurus have lots of fans and equally popular but if you are the right one will tell you straight up.

Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
Or is it Sagittarius woman and Taurus man? This is probably different though. As a taurus woman to a Sagittarius man it is good friendships.

He's the Taurus.

Well the week isn't over and depending on his work schedule is guess just go with the flow, and a friend told you and now you got to see for yourself and see if you guys can get to know each other better by being casual friends and colleagues workers.

I'm going to say just be patient looks like he could be shy or have a gff already. So you have to see and communicate.

look at it from his point of view.

he came on to you with certain signals and you batted them away. he asked you out, you declined. he asked you out again and you ignored him.

he backs off and you come running. he remains fairly distant and you tell him "oh i didn't get your text. it would be nice to see you." ie stepping up the chase from your end.

he asks you out but with vague details and you say yes.

so he could be

a) busy himself

but

b) thinks you're a game player and is being cautious. he is probably not sure how to take you at this stage.

Posted by jeane
look at it from his point of view.

he came on to you with certain signals and you batted them away. he asked you out, you declined. he asked you out again and you ignored him.

he backs off and you come running. he remains fairly distant and you tell him "oh i didn't get your text. it would be nice to see you." ie stepping up the chase from your end.

he asks you out but with vague details and you say yes.

so he could be

a) busy himself

but

b) thinks you're a game player and is being cautious. he is probably not sure how to take you at this stage.

Oh that's not good (game player). If he really thinks that why even say something about seeing each other? I guess if I just see things a little more black and white; I would've just left it alone. I have never dealt with a Taurus before, is there a way to get him to see that I'm not trying to play games? I would like to get know him better and spend time with him.

Yes just talk to him.

So many flags here, New in town, the new girl!, I better not waste any time and get myself a man, because that’s what you do when you start a new life, what is the easiest option , with plenty of guys on tap, ah yes work relationships, “work" , right off the bat, right !, and staff don’t gossip, right !

My advice , join a book club,get a pet, chill with your new friends, enjoy, get settled in your new place, take it slow , nothing to prove here.., and nothing to rush into either, you haven’t even done your heath & safety course at work, and you’re thinking of dating some co-worker, who everyone knows. Im guessing you have, more self-respect or you wouldn’t be here, he’s testing you and I would to. You both have busy lives, were trust is important, if you were together, security & loyalty come before the 10 commandments , with a Bull. Murphy's law will bring a time @ work when he needs you, neglect opens up a shh load of pain, you were busy , and she was working late.If you come across as a prick tease, that you enjoy playing these games with everyone, then you will be an accomplisment in the staff roster.

Posted by 2putITmildly
So many flags here, New in town, the new girl!, I better not waste any time and get myself a man, because that’s what you do when you start a new life, what is the easiest option , with plenty of guys on tap, ah yes work relationships, “work" , right off the bat, right !, and staff don’t gossip, right !

My advice , join a book club,get a pet, chill with your new friends, enjoy, get settled in your new place, take it slow , nothing to prove here.., and nothing to rush into either, you haven’t even done your heath & safety course at work, and you’re thinking of dating some co-worker, who everyone knows. Im guessing you have, more self-respect or you wouldn’t be here, he’s testing you and I would to. You both have busy lives, were trust is important, if you were together, security & loyalty come before the 10 commandments , with a Bull. Murphy's law will bring a time @ work when he needs you, neglect opens up a shh load of pain, you were busy , and she was working late.If you come across as a prick tease, that you enjoy playing these games with everyone, then you will be an accomplisment in the staff roster.

....this has nothing to do with getting a man. If I was so interested in that don't you think I wouldn't have declined his offer to get drinks? I feel bad honestly. If the tables were turned I would be slightly upset that my advances weren't being reciprocated. Plus, if two people are interested in each other and I just happen to move to a new city I don't see how that is a red flag. I'm not trying to marry the man lol, heck not even a relationship.

Not sure why FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428 said it doesn't sound like he is interested...it CLEARLY sounds like he was interested, but of course with all the rejection/disinterest he felt from you, he probably backed off and either got over it or is not going to put as much effort in.

I think it would be ok for YOU to reach out to him (if you are interested) this time and have him meet you for a drink this time. He put in enough work to show his initial interest.

Posted by ashley1734
Not sure why FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428 said it doesn't sound like he is interested...it CLEARLY sounds like he was interested, but of course with all the rejection/disinterest he felt from you, he probably backed off and either got over it or is not going to put as much effort in.

I think it would be ok for YOU to reach out to him (if you are interested) this time and have him meet you for a drink this time. He put in enough work to show his initial interest.

Yea I'm hoping he just didn't get over it. I just assumed since he was the one who asked if this weekend was good he was still interested. I'll try and reach out to him again.

Posted by lagyaal
Oh that's not good (game player). If he really thinks that why even say something about seeing each other? I guess if I just see things a little more black and white; I would've just left it alone. I have never dealt with a Taurus before, is there a way to get him to see that I'm not trying to play games? I would like to get know him better and spend time with him.

bulls do test but i don't think this is a test. with bulls you have to endure an assessment period where they deconstruct you as a potential partner. it is very subtle and it can take several months. why even say something about seeing each other? you're still in the assessment period. he hasn't made his mind up about you just yet.

how do you get this guy back? be consistent in your attention. that's not to say you should fall over yourself to get to him but when he reaches out, be there to reciprocate. i would send him a message saying "where were you thinking of going for dinner? i'm hungry already!" or something along those lines. see how he responds.

the good thing about bulls is they are quick to give second (third and fourth) chances. just don't take their good nature for granted.

hmmmmm, I agree totally with Jeane in the approach at this point - being that he's probably backed off thinking he was not getting anywhere - and then you agree to go out but he's being cautious in case you back out again -

yes ask him what he had in mind about the going out - that would be good conversation being that Taurus like to dine fine and I don't mean expensive - good food and clean cozy atmosphere is appealing to any Taurus ...

keep us posted 🙂

I know exactly what kind of advice I was giving, I am not stupid but clearly if a taurus is really interested she would know. And a Taurus just doesn't 't put themselves on the line that fast. Nope I don't care how many air placements you have. So is he testing her or lost interests or has a gff.

Posted by tcta
hmmmmm, I agree totally with Jeane in the approach at this point - being that he's probably backed off thinking he was not getting anywhere - and then you agree to go out but he's being cautious in case you back out again -

yes ask him what he had in mind about the going out - that would be good conversation being that Taurus like to dine fine and I don't mean expensive - good food and clean cozy atmosphere is appealing to any Taurus ...

keep us posted 🙂

Update.

So he reached out to me a two days later asking me how my week was going. We've been talking all this time. This morning he texted me and asked what I was doing this weekend and I said um not sure.

Okay.

Wtf. hahaha.

I already told him earlier this week that this weekend was good for me.

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by tcta
hmmmmm, I agree totally with Jeane in the approach at this point - being that he's probably backed off thinking he was not getting anywhere - and then you agree to go out but he's being cautious in case you back out again -

yes ask him what he had in mind about the going out - that would be good conversation being that Taurus like to dine fine and I don't mean expensive - good food and clean cozy atmosphere is appealing to any Taurus ...

keep us posted 🙂

Update.

So he reached out to me a two days later asking me how my week was going. We've been talking all this time. This morning he texted me and asked what I was doing this weekend and I said um not sure.

Okay.

Wtf. hahaha.

I already told him earlier this week that this weekend was good for me.

click to expand

Posted by jeane

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by tcta
hmmmmm, I agree totally with Jeane in the approach at this point - being that he's probably backed off thinking he was not getting anywhere - and then you agree to go out but he's being cautious in case you back out again -

yes ask him what he had in mind about the going out - that would be good conversation being that Taurus like to dine fine and I don't mean expensive - good food and clean cozy atmosphere is appealing to any Taurus ...

keep us posted 🙂

Update.

So he reached out to me a two days later asking me how my week was going. We've been talking all this time. This morning he texted me and asked what I was doing this weekend and I said um not sure.

Okay.

Wtf. hahaha.

I already told him earlier this week that this weekend was good for me.

http://replygif.net/i/837.gif<div class="bqfade">click to expand

haha. I can't tell if that's for him, me, or for the both of us lol.

all the time

You. Most definitely you.

Posted by jeane
You. Most definitely you.

Uh oh. Slow one here lol, but why?

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by jeane
You. Most definitely you.

Uh oh. Slow on here lol, but why?

click to expand

Are you just toying with this guy? Why are you playing "hard to get"?

Posted by jeane

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by jeane
You. Most definitely you.

Uh oh. Slow on here lol, but why?

Are you just toying with this guy? Why are you playing "hard to get"?

click to expand

Neither. I was just giving an honest answer. I really wasn't sure. I was thrown off by him asking me that. I actually thought it was him trying to blow me off with that question instead of making concrete plans so I just gave an honest safe answer.

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by jeane

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by jeane
You. Most definitely you.

Uh oh. Slow on here lol, but why?

Are you just toying with this guy? Why are you playing "hard to get"?

Neither. I was just giving an honest answer. I really wasn't sure. I was thrown off by him asking me that. I actually thought it was him trying to blow me off so I just gave an honest safe answer.

click to expand

So saying something along the lines of "I thought I was going out with you" is the 'unsafe' answer?

Posted by jeane

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by jeane

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by jeane
You. Most definitely you.

Uh oh. Slow on here lol, but why?

Are you just toying with this guy? Why are you playing "hard to get"?

Neither. I was just giving an honest answer. I really wasn't sure. I was thrown off by him asking me that. I actually thought it was him trying to blow me off so I just gave an honest safe answer.

So saying something along the lines of "I thought I was going out with you" is the 'unsafe' answer?

click to expand

Since I thought he was blowing me off, yes lol.
I just don't understand why not just ask directly if we were still on or even make plans. I'm starting to think that maybe he's doing the tethering thing. You know where a guy is only semi interested but he doesn't want to lose you as an option so he does things to keep you interested, ex., text you. Hope that made sense lol.

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by jeane

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by jeane

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by jeane
You. Most definitely you.

Uh oh. Slow on here lol, but why?

Are you just toying with this guy? Why are you playing "hard to get"?

Neither. I was just giving an honest answer. I really wasn't sure. I was thrown off by him asking me that. I actually thought it was him trying to blow me off so I just gave an honest safe answer.

So saying something along the lines of "I thought I was going out with you" is the 'unsafe' answer?

Since I thought he was blowing me off, yes lol.
I just don't understand why not just ask directly if we were still on or even make plans. I'm starting to think that maybe he's doing the tethering thing. You know where a guy is only semi interested but he doesn't want to lose you as an option so he does things to keep you interested, ex., text you. Hope that made sense lol.

click to expand

The thing is if you think he is playing games, then the solution is not to play games in response. If you want a straight talking conversation then have a straight talking conversation. It's not difficult but if you cannot handle the thought of being rejected then you are not ready to date. It is part of the process.

Anything less is sabotaging yourself. It won't work with anyone if you want to hold all your cards close to your chest while the other person lays themselves on the line. Why would any right thinking person accept that kind of behaviour?

Ladygal...

This is who he sees.

A woman who has a high exaggerated opinion of herself....
Flighty, pretentious, dismissive and possibly capable of being disloyal.

He asked you if you had plans for this weekend.
Why would you say you were unsure?
If you had plans...then you were lying, and wanted to see if he was going to ask you out.
If you didn't have plans...then you were lying, and didn't want to appear too available.

Bulls are quite perceptive, and ACTIVE listeners.

Tread carefully.

Posted by TaurusBull1977
Ladygal...

This is who he sees.

A woman who has a high exaggerated opinion of herself....
Flighty, pretentious, dismissive and possibly capable of being disloyal.

He asked you if you had plans for this weekend.
Why would you say you were unsure?
If you had plans...then you were lying, and wanted to see if he was going to ask you out.
If you didn't have plans...then you were lying, and didn't want to appear too available.

Bulls are quite perceptive, and ACTIVE listeners.

Tread carefully.

I said was unsure because I really wasn't sure what I was doing this weekend. I have some tentative plans with my girlfriends but nothing concrete. So unsure of what I'm doing.We hadn't made concrete plans yet. He asked me if this weekend was good for me, I said yes,and then he didn't hear from him until 2 days later (Wednesday). I thought we were going to do something but when he asked what I was doing this weekend I thought he had nixed our plans.

What Jeane and TB said.

He asked you out.

You decided not to give a straight answer.

If you were unsure of your plans with him or your friends then you would have elaborated further with your response. You chose to deliberately be vague and coy.

I read your post with the update and was thinking 'great, he asked her out!' Then I read your bullshit reply. That's so sad.

What are you expecting him to do with that reply? He might as well shove it up his arsehole! He can't really go anywhere with it. Put the boot on other foot and see how you would feel if you were him.

Posted by AgentP911
What Jeane and TB said.

He asked you out.

You decided not to give a straight answer.

If you were unsure of your plans with him or your friends then you would have elaborated further with your response. You chose to deliberately be vague and coy.

I read your post with the update and was thinking 'great, he asked her out!' Then I read your bullshit reply. That's so sad.

What are you expecting him to do with that reply? He might as well shove it up his arsehole! He can't really go anywhere with it. Put the boot on other foot and see how you would feel if you were him.

That's the thing, he never really asked me out. I was thinking and I think at this point he doesn't really want to see me. He has yet to actually ask me, even after I expressed that I wanted to see him. I think he's just doing enough to keep me interested to hang on without trying to progress anything.

Posted by Impulsv
They don't
It's all passive aggressive
Like we should do coffee n wait for you to set it up
If you ok n wait for them nothing will happen

yea I might be okay with that if he wasn't so direct before lol.

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by AgentP911
What Jeane and TB said.

He asked you out.

You decided not to give a straight answer.

If you were unsure of your plans with him or your friends then you would have elaborated further with your response. You chose to deliberately be vague and coy.

I read your post with the update and was thinking 'great, he asked her out!' Then I read your bullshit reply. That's so sad.

What are you expecting him to do with that reply? He might as well shove it up his arsehole! He can't really go anywhere with it. Put the boot on other foot and see how you would feel if you were him.

That's the thing, he never really asked me out. I was thinking and I think at this point he doesn't really want to see me. He has yet to actually ask me, even after I expressed that I wanted to see him. I think he's just doing enough to keep me interested to hang on without trying to progress anything.

click to expand

If you think he is a bit of a chancer with keeping you as an option, then you must think he is a bit of a bastard, why even entertain the thought of going out with him? It seems he has lost with you before he has even begun.

Being a Taurus he is not one to play games. If he is interested, he is interested. If he wants to spend time with you, then he that is a commitment (albeit a small one) on his part. His approach was his caution showing. Guys get shy too. Guys are uncertain as well and don't want to be rejected. Try to think about things from his point of view. Every time he reaches out to you, you push his hand away. He is eventually going to stop reaching out.

To speak frank, you need to stop being a bitch. You're doing it because you are scared of having your feelings hurt but welcome to world. It is something we all have do deal with.

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by Impulsv
They don't
It's all passive aggressive
Like we should do coffee n wait for you to set it up
If you ok n wait for them nothing will happen

yea I might be okay with that if he wasn't so direct before lol.

click to expand

If I were you I wouldn't pursue this guy. You don't seem compatible at all. Sometimes you have to put yourself out there. Sometimes people aren't going to present themselves they way you would like.

But you're already keeping score with this guy and you haven't even been out yet. Let it go. It's just a waste of time on both your parts.

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by AgentP911
What Jeane and TB said.

He asked you out.

You decided not to give a straight answer.

If you were unsure of your plans with him or your friends then you would have elaborated further with your response. You chose to deliberately be vague and coy.

I read your post with the update and was thinking 'great, he asked her out!' Then I read your bullshit reply. That's so sad.

What are you expecting him to do with that reply? He might as well shove it up his arsehole! He can't really go anywhere with it. Put the boot on other foot and see how you would feel if you were him.

That's the thing, he never really asked me out. I was thinking and I think at this point he doesn't really want to see me. He has yet to actually ask me, even after I expressed that I wanted to see him. I think he's just doing enough to keep me interested to hang on without trying to progress anything.

click to expand

What does 'asking someone out' look like to you?

He asked what you were doing this weekend.

He HAS asked you out before. It's in your first couple of posts. As Jeane said, you kept batting him away so now he's not going to put himself out there as much because he already has. He's still trying to make a plan with you but you're playing hard to get. How's that working out for you? Not well I see. Then you whinge about being all confused and adding in bullshit about you think he asked you to get rid of you or whatever.

Get your head from your arse!! Just ask him to meet you and make a plan!! It shouldn't be this hard. If it is then something is wrong!!

Yes he tested the ground and found you unresponsive. Reach out for him!

@Op- you know I just realized that even if I don't like you like that. I will just casually ask you how you are, what your weekend plans are routinely, what did you cook for dinner or lunch. So just friendly type of talk I do on a daily basis or every once in while. If the infatuation phase passed then I just fall back, detach, and live life.

Posted by Incorrigible

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by tcta
hmmmmm, I agree totally with Jeane in the approach at this point - being that he's probably backed off thinking he was not getting anywhere - and then you agree to go out but he's being cautious in case you back out again -

yes ask him what he had in mind about the going out - that would be good conversation being that Taurus like to dine fine and I don't mean expensive - good food and clean cozy atmosphere is appealing to any Taurus ...

keep us posted 🙂

Update.

So he reached out to me a two days later asking me how my week was going. We've been talking all this time. This morning he texted me and asked what I was doing this weekend and I said um not sure.

Okay.

Wtf. hahaha.

I already told him earlier this week that this weekend was good for me.

Wow! He must be a gentleman :-)
He didn't take you for granted, sweet of him.
And why would you say unsure?

click to expand

Because I was really unsure what my plans for the weekend were going to be.

I'd move on to greener pastures. So not worth the headache. I've dated a few Taurus men and not all Taurus men behave in this way. But there was one that behaved much like this one. I just moved on. I'm very direct and want that in a partner he was passive-aggressive, inferring things but never just coming right out with it. When I was direct he would get silent/distant. Just didn't work for me.

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by TaurusBull1977
Ladygal...

This is who he sees.

A woman who has a high exaggerated opinion of herself....
Flighty, pretentious, dismissive and possibly capable of being disloyal.

He asked you if you had plans for this weekend.
Why would you say you were unsure?
If you had plans...then you were lying, and wanted to see if he was going to ask you out.
If you didn't have plans...then you were lying, and didn't want to appear too available.

Bulls are quite perceptive, and ACTIVE listeners.

Tread carefully.

I said was unsure because I really wasn't sure what I was doing this weekend. I have some tentative plans with my girlfriends but nothing concrete. So unsure of what I'm doing.We hadn't made concrete plans yet. He asked me if this weekend was good for me, I said yes,and then he didn't hear from him until 2 days later (Wednesday). I thought we were going to do something but when he asked what I was doing this weekend I thought he had nixed our plans.

I'm not sure what your sun sign is or your placements but I do know that taurus men don't like air headed dumb girls , especially if the Taurus has gem placements! Right now are coming across as an a dumb airhead who doesn't even know what time of day it is by the look of it!

Taurus likes a straight shooter! Look the target dead in the eye; aim and fire ! Bullseye ! Straight ! No uncertainty! U act like your right hand does not know what your left hand is doing and Taurus has better things to do than waste their time on time wasters! Smh!

click to expand

I'm far from dumb. I'm not sure what your sign or your placement is but being illiterate must be a part of your placement. I clearly said unless a man explicitly states his interests I'm oblivious to his advances.

We've actually got things figured out. Thanks.

sure you do !

Posted by tcta
sure you do !

He finally asked to see me. We went to dinner last night and we had a nice discussion about things. He thought that I wasn't interested so he was hesitant about asking me and was surprised that I finally said yes to going out with him. Pretty much everything that jeane and agentp911 had said was correct. So yes, we have figured things out.

Posted by lagyaal

Posted by tcta
sure you do !

He finally asked to see me. We went to dinner last night and we had a nice discussion about things. He thought that I wasn't interested so he was hesitant about asking me and was surprised that I finally said yes to going out with him. Pretty much everything that jeane and agentp911 had said was correct. So yes, we have figured things out.

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Yea! Nice one! You just gotta keep it up now and don't forget to talk to him about things. You don't have to pour your heart out but communication is key.

well I hope this trend continues for you - and yes, be open and straight up no ice