calming an angry bull

let me quickly say, this bull is not angry at me.

if you are angry, what is the best thing people can do for you?

do you want to be left alone? do you need to have someone listen to your gripes? would a nice meal soothe you? would you like some *ahem* physical activity? or do you just have to go through the process and let time be the best solution.

Posted by P_Ands
beej

ha! oh ands, i never know whether to take you seriously or not. 😄

Yep, fixed anger needs time to dissipate. I have leo sun and mars, my SO has Aqua sun and Venus, Taurus moon. Anger explodes, and then simmers down, but must be left alone otherwise it can magnify and get out of control.

I am going to be honest here. I want you to try to comfort me so I can yell at you that I want to be left alone! Hahaha

hi evalani, no no anger towards me at all. shared his feelings with me. i just wanted to know what is the best thing i can do for him when situation arises in the future. thanks for the tip. 🙂

Whenever I really get angry, I really want to lash out what made me angry specially to that particular person. But still I try to control myself not to say too much hurtful words specially to my loved ones. I still stay fair to everyone. It really takes too much to anger me so when I explode, it's really a blast. If you're brave enough to feel the wrath of a raging bull, then be my guest. haha... If I see you're sincerely sorry for something wrong you've done and humble enough to listen to my rambling and apologize, I'll calm down soon and we'll be good.

Or leave me alone for an hour or two, apologize and I'll be able to talk to you more calmly. A nice meal or any treat would also be good.

But if someone doesn't reach out to me to apologize specially if he really owes me an apology and it also took him long, it would cause me to hold grudge against him. When it seems the other person doesn't really care that much that I'm hurt, my anger just increases.

I'd really just need a hug n everything will be ok lol

just be present and tender.. dont force me to talk bec. i will talk when i calm down

Posted by TxOgal
I'd really just need a hug n everything will be ok lol

just be present and tender.. dont force me to talk bec. i will talk when i calm down

I remember one time i got really mad at my bf and before i say anything he hugged me, the only person who knew that about me was my mother, i have no idea how he knew about that .. but i couldnt get angry at him afterwards, its like it melted lol

food

I agree with the music part.
Wow, I didn't even think about that.

Jeanne,
1. Play some music (I don't know his music interest).
2. Throw in a comedy/DVD (decibel loud enough for him to listen and laugh at the jokes) lol.
3. Make a bowl of ice cream (or anything sweet), chocolate syrup with a cherry on top.
4. Remain silent until he initiates the conversation.
5. Later on, still remain silent, give him a soft kiss on the lips and a reassuring hug.

The best approach with a Bull who needs time and space to calm down ...
1. Patience
2. Silence.
3. Understanding.

thanks everyone. taken that all on board. i'll add those tips to my bag of tricks brought out the next time he sees red. 😄

Posted by jeane
let me quickly say, this bull is not angry at me.

if you are angry, what is the best thing people can do for you?

do you want to be left alone? do you need to have someone listen to your gripes? would a nice meal soothe you? would you like some *ahem* physical activity? or do you just have to go through the process and let time be the best solution.

you dont calm down a bull, its impossible 😉

X2 on leave me alone. Give me time to calm down.. no words will do that for me. If you see my eyes get wide, pupils dialate, teeth clench and nostrils flare.. you'd better run while you still can.

Yes... I actually do that. 😄

it feels counter intuitive to leave someone alone when they are angry. it feels like abandonment.

that's not to say someone can't be left with their own thoughts but to actually physically leave them and have no contact seems...wrong.

Not just getting sick, If I'm dealing with a lot emotionally or am trying to think out a predicament in life I will disappear from friends and relatives for quite some time. Usually a few weeks to a few months.

Posted by TaurusBull1977
I agree with the music part.
Wow, I didn't even think about that.

Jeanne,
1. Play some music (I don't know his music interest).
2. Throw in a comedy/DVD (decibel loud enough for him to listen and laugh at the jokes) lol.
3. Make a bowl of ice cream (or anything sweet), chocolate syrup with a cherry on top.
4. Remain silent until he initiates the conversation.
5. Later on, still remain silent, give him a soft kiss on the lips and a reassuring hug.

The best approach with a Bull who needs time and space to calm down ...
1. Patience
2. Silence.
3. Understanding.

I love this! I normally do no. 3 and 5. Not necessarily ice cream, but desserts. I love baking and he loves eating.

I forgot to say that one MUST apologize and genuinely admit their wrong doing "as soon as possible".. in words and actions.. if you come to me after two days..i will think you dont care about me, the nights i spent sad wont be erased from my memory.. and I agree with those who said to let us speak out about how they hurt us..

It doesnt take long for me to forgive if a person admits their mistake.. maybe 1 or 2 days max. I keep calm about it though..

Posted by jeane
it feels counter intuitive to leave someone alone when they are angry. it feels like abandonment.

that's not to say someone can't be left with their own thoughts but to actually physically leave them and have no contact seems...wrong.

+1

Posted by TxOgal
I forgot to say that one MUST apologize and genuinely admit their wrong doing "as soon as possible".. in words and actions.. if you come to me after two days..i will think you dont care about me, the nights i spent sad wont be erased from my memory.. and I agree with those who said to let us speak out about how they hurt us..

It doesnt take long for me to forgive if a person admits their mistake.. maybe 1 or 2 days max. I keep calm about it though..

thanks TX. like i said, it wasn't me who wronged this bull but i wanted to know the best way to be what he needed and bring him back to his usual jolly self.

That is very sincere of you 🙂

Posted by TxOgal
I forgot to say that one MUST apologize and genuinely admit their wrong doing "as soon as possible".. in words and actions.. if you come to me after two days..i will think you dont care about me, the nights i spent sad wont be erased from my memory.. and I agree with those who said to let us speak out about how they hurt us..

It doesnt take long for me to forgive if a person admits their mistake.. maybe 1 or 2 days max. I keep calm about it though..

Of course, this is a given! But from what I understand of Jeane's original post, she wasn't the one to make him mad. She just wanted to know how to calm down an angry Taurus man.... This is something I obviously can relate, having a Taurus husband. He very seldom gets angry, but when he does, oh boy! Fortunately, I've never been at the end of his angry horns, but he has come home from work upset. The worst was when one of his business partners did something that cost their company some financial loss and damaged the company's standing and reputation. In this case, the partner did not apologise nor owned up to his wrongdoing. He just quit the company, which made my husband even madder. I remember he sat stewing for a whole week. It was quite early on in our marriage, and I just didn't know what to do! Other than to feed and soothe him... But yeah, that seemed to work 🙂

Make me laugh or leave me alone 😉