Offended by help and support

Profile picture of Yoonited392
Yoonited392
@Yoonited392
9 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 9 · Topics: 2
So my Taurus friend who is also a crush always seems to get offended when I try to help her or offer support - she always says that she is very independent and she can handle it.

It's not that I don't think she can handle it - it's that it is in my nature to want to be there for someone I care about?

Is this common with Taurus women? And if so, how can I be there for her without making her feel like she can't take care of things herself?

Just seems like people are always taking advantage of her and no one is ever really there for her...
Profile picture of TaurusBull1977
TaurusBull1977
@TaurusBull1977
16 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 4771 · Topics: 30
What's your sign?

We are bullheaded, and detest feeling like damsels in distress. It's linear, you wouldn't understand it. We set an objective, focus on that particular goal, and we charge with very little distractions.

However, this is where the contradiction comes in, we want you to help us, it shows masculinity, leadership and reliability. It's an 'attractive' distraction.

Solution:

You have to learn to finesse your 'interruptions'....

Help her out, but immediately apologize for assisting her, by reassuring her...Sorry, I was just being a gentleman."

Contrary to popular belief about a strong female Bull and her independence, we're still big Venusian softies at heart who prefer an old fashioned courtship from a man who is quite chivalrous.

Profile picture of LillyPetal
LillyPetal
@LillyPetal
10 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 33 · Posts: 5490 · Topics: 118
You have good intentions, but they shouldn't be forced on someone. If the point of helping someone is to...well, help them, then insisting on helping someone who doesn't want it is counterintuitive, yes? Just because something is offered does not mean the recipient is obligated to accept.

That is, of course, you you genuinely want to help her just for the sake of helping her. All of this will be less easy to accept if you happen to have an alterior motive, say, wooing the Taurus lady, perhaps?
Profile picture of FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
FirstDecanTaurianWoman0428
@FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
11 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 1 · Posts: 16583 · Topics: 222
Posted by Yoonited392
So my Taurus friend who is also a crush always seems to get offended when I try to help her or offer support - she always says that she is very independent and she can handle it.

It's not that I don't think she can handle it - it's that it is in my nature to want to be there for someone I care about?

Is this common with Taurus women? And if so, how can I be there for her without making her feel like she can't take care of things herself?

Just seems like people are always taking advantage of her and no one is ever really there for her...
Yeah it's true
Profile picture of Season
Season
@Season
9 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 15 · Posts: 2521 · Topics: 107
Posted by Yoonited392
No ulterior motives here. Just feel like she is overworked (which she says she is all the time) and not appreciated. I feel like people take advantage of her and it drives me crazy!

But I can take a step back and let her come to me if that's what she wants. She said if she needs my help, she will ask which I get! Just in my nature to offer support for someone I care about so much
I think that's your best bet. She'll most likely appreciate your concern coupled by your respect that she can handle things. Good luck.
Profile picture of 2putITmildly
2putITmildly
@2putITmildly
9 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 116 · Topics: 0
@OP
I always love this quote: If someone steals your shirt, give them your coat, bulls are always getting used, to use your line, it’s in their nature, sometimes we see it, but still allow it, sometimes we slowly cut that person off, there are many threads on the disappearing act, our biggest problem (imho) is not cutting our ties until it’s too late.
Actions speak louder than words and being thoughtful, we love being pampered, even a simple dinner or saying thank-you hits the spot, to know you support us, but we need to make up our own damn mind, about you or the situation, hence some call it stubbornness, but they forgot the payload of determination and inner strength that comes with it, and maybe that same stubbornness has to defend you.

Change for us is like sunlight to a vampire, we do ask for help in a clandestine manner, I wouldn’t be here myself if I didn't find this forum and fellow bulls invaluable, but we have no problem owning up to the consequences of our actions,unless its the taxman.