RainbowFish
@Goldfish
10 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 188 · Topics: 34
Should I return the Bull's call or wait for him to call again?
Posted by GoldfishGoldfish, you do how you feel.... nothings gonna change
After over a week of broken and rare communication the Bull txt me last night to say he would be contacting me sometime today and expected my full attention.
Then he calls in the morning and I don't answer but I message straight away to explain why I can't take his call (I was having a medical checkup).
I do want to talk to him and ideally use skype which needs to be done late in the night after my daughter is asleep (his timezone is 2 hours ahead).
Do I call when convenient for me or do I just wait for him to contact me again?
He has been very busy lately and this impacted communication, which hurt me a lot, should I let him sweat now or would it be seen as game playing?
if you fell you can not bear to not answer, than answer........ you will know, when your patience is up🙂 but uptill then, you just do whatever you wish to do in the moment, because its not what is going to change it.....
LDR (long distance relationsihp) is a hard one, you try not to cause trouble, because its not easy to make it up, if there is no personal contact..... but, important thing is, do how you feel, so you cant blame yourself later, that you didnt do everything in your power to change it
Forgot to mention that we have an inside joke about 'having expectations '
Forgot to mention that we have an inside joke about 'having expectations'
@OP- Yeah focus on you and your kids, and just let it be. Let him contact you give it space...You're both busy with life. Taurus are more prone to working hard even if it kills me or my lover...which if you are my lover I make time regardless and I work two night shift jobs. So it can be hard but you have to understand we work and hard and tend to still give you some kind of attention...
However really everyone will make time when the time comes, when it's the right time. A guy interested in someone will make time even if it is 5-10 minutes of text messages or phone calls or Skype even...
You got to stick to a schedule that works for both..set a time. And if no one keeps that up.. let thAt go and find someone to make time.
Don't do ultimatums, but simply communicate a time....nicely and see where it comes. Don't demand because I am not budging an inch.
However really everyone will make time when the time comes, when it's the right time. A guy interested in someone will make time even if it is 5-10 minutes of text messages or phone calls or Skype even...
You got to stick to a schedule that works for both..set a time. And if no one keeps that up.. let thAt go and find someone to make time.
Don't do ultimatums, but simply communicate a time....nicely and see where it comes. Don't demand because I am not budging an inch.
Oh my expectations are in no joking matter. Either we are into you as a lover or you're my side chick mistress...no games with expectations..
can't you just send him a message to say 'should i call you when i am free?"
OP, you wait until he contacts you again...
in the meantime..... dont wait for phone calls and skype, but write him messages (is it possible any other way, then via phone? like facebook or emails?) do not wait for his answers, but report him your daily routine, be funny and write about details, who said you what and what you thought.... occassionally ask him for advise..... ocassionally write him about your accomplishments during the day.... ocassionally write him about your fairs....
so, dont relay only on calling and skype, but writing "letters", you know? and dont worry, if he doesnt respond, just act like you didnt notice and carry on with your letters (not overboard!) lure him in🙂 and be positive🙂
in the meantime..... dont wait for phone calls and skype, but write him messages (is it possible any other way, then via phone? like facebook or emails?) do not wait for his answers, but report him your daily routine, be funny and write about details, who said you what and what you thought.... occassionally ask him for advise..... ocassionally write him about your accomplishments during the day.... ocassionally write him about your fairs....
so, dont relay only on calling and skype, but writing "letters", you know? and dont worry, if he doesnt respond, just act like you didnt notice and carry on with your letters (not overboard!) lure him in🙂 and be positive🙂
I mean, you can´t write letters via text....... so any other options?
Posted by Pandora101what? dear god, i'd rather pull out my eyelashes than write all the boring daily details of my life to a guy who no longer gives a shit.
OP, you wait until he contacts you again...
in the meantime..... dont wait for phone calls and skype, but write him messages (is it possible any other way, then via phone? like facebook or emails?) do not wait for his answers, but report him your daily routine, be funny and write about details, who said you what and what you thought.... occassionally ask him for advise..... ocassionally write him about your accomplishments during the day.... ocassionally write him about your fairs....
so, dont relay only on calling and skype, but writing "letters", you know? and dont worry, if he doesnt respond, just act like you didnt notice and carry on with your letters (not overboard!) lure him in🙂 and be positive🙂
Posted by jeanejeane, 🙂 dont forget, they are LDR.... they dont really know each other, they met like 1 months earlier...... lots of assumptions which can not be resolved at once........its not going to happen via skype and phone calls, when you censure yourself...... letters are the thing! 🙂 well, at least in case, she really wants him....... or wants to tryPosted by Pandora101what? dear god, i'd rather pull out my eyelashes than write all the boring daily details of my life to a guy who no longer gives a shit.
OP, you wait until he contacts you again...
in the meantime..... dont wait for phone calls and skype, but write him messages (is it possible any other way, then via phone? like facebook or emails?) do not wait for his answers, but report him your daily routine, be funny and write about details, who said you what and what you thought.... occassionally ask him for advise..... ocassionally write him about your accomplishments during the day.... ocassionally write him about your fairs....
so, dont relay only on calling and skype, but writing "letters", you know? and dont worry, if he doesnt respond, just act like you didnt notice and carry on with your letters (not overboard!) lure him in🙂 and be positive🙂click to expand
and you can write about your "boring daily details" of your life in a way it tells something about you🙂 I know I can 🙂 🙂
Posted by Pandora101she felt she new him well enough to sleep with him. detailed letters of your day may be the thing for women but i highly doubt it is a veritable honey pot for men. they are not interested when they are standing right in front of you, why in the world would he be interested when he is miles away?Posted by jeanejeane, 🙂 dont forget, they are LDR.... they dont really know each other, they met like 1 months earlier...... lots of assumptions which can not be resolved at once........its not going to happen via skype and phone calls, when you censure yourself...... letters are the thing! 🙂 well, at least in case, she really wants him....... or wants to tryPosted by Pandora101what? dear god, i'd rather pull out my eyelashes than write all the boring daily details of my life to a guy who no longer gives a shit.
OP, you wait until he contacts you again...
in the meantime..... dont wait for phone calls and skype, but write him messages (is it possible any other way, then via phone? like facebook or emails?) do not wait for his answers, but report him your daily routine, be funny and write about details, who said you what and what you thought.... occassionally ask him for advise..... ocassionally write him about your accomplishments during the day.... ocassionally write him about your fairs....
so, dont relay only on calling and skype, but writing "letters", you know? and dont worry, if he doesnt respond, just act like you didnt notice and carry on with your letters (not overboard!) lure him in🙂 and be positive🙂
and you can write about your "boring daily details" of your life in a way it tells something about you🙂 I know I can 🙂 🙂
click to expand
knew*
Posted by jeaneI txt him saying that "I am home now and shall we speak later?"
can't you just send him a message to say 'should i call you when i am free?"
Yet to hear a reply.
Posted by Pandora101Huumm, this is a difficult one, I am not sure he would appreciate constant communication like this, he is not even keeping up with phone messages and I don't do it too much anyway.
OP, you wait until he contacts you again...
in the meantime..... dont wait for phone calls and skype, but write him messages (is it possible any other way, then via phone? like facebook or emails?) do not wait for his answers, but report him your daily routine, be funny and write about details, who said you what and what you thought.... occassionally ask him for advise..... ocassionally write him about your accomplishments during the day.... ocassionally write him about your fairs....
so, dont relay only on calling and skype, but writing "letters", you know? and dont worry, if he doesnt respond, just act like you didnt notice and carry on with your letters (not overboard!) lure him in🙂 and be positive🙂
He does send me some funny email's attachment ssometimes or share some Facebook things privately, maybe that is what I should do too.
Posted by NevermoreThing is: I am not sure if the red flags are real or exaggeration , or are products of my fertile imagination, or I am just projecting my dad issues, or ex relationship issues, or other people's relationship issues….
I though you finally amputate after you read the whole red flag things.
Believe me it is hard been a Pisces…when they say there is a fine line between reality and non reality they are right…It is so hard to explain but it sucks. I know it sounds crazy, I am fed up of reading all the crazy stuff they say to describe Pisces…
Sometimes I wish I was a Earth or Fire sign.
She's not listening, she'll figure it out soon..
I am getting there and will make the decision eventually. All in its own time.
So when I got home in the afternoon I sent a message saying I was home and would like to talk later,,
No replies
About 3 hours after I message again asking if we can talk
No replies
I then call
No answer
All because I couldn't talk to him when he wanted to. And this is the person who can never talk.
Or maybe because of another stupid txt message communication.
He hasn't checked my messages since morning when I couldn't talk. He checked the last one and never came back to it. Unless there is a way to check but it doesn't show…we use whatsapp.
I am hitting so much. I know I need to move on. I am so angry I let myself down by being in the situation. When I met him I was happy on my own and wasn't looking for anything. I now just want to heal and get back to that state of mind again. I am not looking forward for all the tears and pain I will have to go through to get there,
No replies
About 3 hours after I message again asking if we can talk
No replies
I then call
No answer
All because I couldn't talk to him when he wanted to. And this is the person who can never talk.
Or maybe because of another stupid txt message communication.
He hasn't checked my messages since morning when I couldn't talk. He checked the last one and never came back to it. Unless there is a way to check but it doesn't show…we use whatsapp.
I am hitting so much. I know I need to move on. I am so angry I let myself down by being in the situation. When I met him I was happy on my own and wasn't looking for anything. I now just want to heal and get back to that state of mind again. I am not looking forward for all the tears and pain I will have to go through to get there,
So as I was taking sad selfies of myself, he txts to ask "what's up" I say "Just tried to return your call", he says: "just left the cinema and heading home"
I said "call if you want to, don't call if you don't want to"
I know it sounds childish and aggressive but I am so fed up right now.
I said "call if you want to, don't call if you don't want to"
I know it sounds childish and aggressive but I am so fed up right now.
Posted by Goldfishsad selfies?
So as I was taking sad selfies of myself, he txts to ask "what's up" I say "Just tried to return your call", he says: "just left the cinema and heading home"
I said "call if you want to, don't call if you don't want to"
I know it sounds childish and aggressive but I am so fed up right now.
Posted by jeaneJust for fun, wouldn't send them to anyone…LOLPosted by Goldfishsad selfies?
So as I was taking sad selfies of myself, he txts to ask "what's up" I say "Just tried to return your call", he says: "just left the cinema and heading home"
I said "call if you want to, don't call if you don't want to"
I know it sounds childish and aggressive but I am so fed up right now.click to expand
You expect him to understand when you're busy and can't talk, but when he doesn't respond you immediately think he's doing it for some other reason besides being busy? What the heck, girl. If you trust someone, you should be able to give them the benefit of the doubt. And if you don't trust him, why are you wasting your time on him?
Deal done.
Advice irrelevant. Bye you know what is left to do. Done deal..
So he didn't call yesterday. Maybe he was with somebody, maybe he just didn't want to. He knew I wanted to, just completely ignored.
I couldn't go to sleep.
So I sent him an email. It was an honest email, serious enough for him to have no doubts about how I been feeling lately but lighthearted enough, easy to read. There was no accusation, no shaming, no judging and no game playing. I gave him a perfect opportunity to go bow out with dignity and respect or just disappear to greener pastures without a word. It's up to him now.
As for me I woke up better. Feeling fresh and free. I realise I am not ready to be involved with a man just yet. Specially in a LDR.
I'm hurting but I will come out ok in the end. It's just one more scar. Got to be more careful next time. Fucking Aries Venus, not good for a Son/Moon Pisces.
I couldn't go to sleep.
So I sent him an email. It was an honest email, serious enough for him to have no doubts about how I been feeling lately but lighthearted enough, easy to read. There was no accusation, no shaming, no judging and no game playing. I gave him a perfect opportunity to go bow out with dignity and respect or just disappear to greener pastures without a word. It's up to him now.
As for me I woke up better. Feeling fresh and free. I realise I am not ready to be involved with a man just yet. Specially in a LDR.
I'm hurting but I will come out ok in the end. It's just one more scar. Got to be more careful next time. Fucking Aries Venus, not good for a Son/Moon Pisces.
Posted by Goldfishso you are still 'together'?
So he didn't call yesterday. Maybe he was with somebody, maybe he just didn't want to. He knew I wanted to, just completely ignored.
I couldn't go to sleep.
So I sent him an email. It was an honest email, serious enough for him to have no doubts about how I been feeling lately but lighthearted enough, easy to read. There was no accusation, no shaming, no judging and no game playing. I gave him a perfect opportunity to go bow out with dignity and respect or just disappear to greener pastures without a word. It's up to him now.
As for me I woke up better. Feeling fresh and free. I realise I am not ready to be involved with a man just yet. Specially in a LDR.
I'm hurting but I will come out ok in the end. It's just one more scar. Got to be more careful next time. Fucking Aries Venus, not good for a Son/Moon Pisces.
Up to him if he will say at least goodbye or just desintegrate from my world.
Obviously, if he cares, there is also the scope to explain, and try to reconnect but if my gut feeling is right, he will just let me go.
I gave him a gift, I made it so easy for him to be true to himself and myself and end things in a loving manner with no drama or hard feelings (we spoke about it right in the beginning). If he can't really do this he knows he can just be silent and I will understand and leave it alone.
Either way, I have so much passion, I can't bottle up. I had to express myself last night. Probably I went against all the professional dating programs advice that I have been hooked up to lately. Fuck it. I needed to be me. I wasn't being the real me lately, for fear of losing his attention and attraction, and it didn't work anyway. Being the real me is the best option. If he can't take it so it wasn't to be.
Maybe I will post the email here later and see what you guys think. You guys are so full of wisdom. I appreciate all the advice. Taurus you really are a great sign. You lucky ones!
Anyway he messaged me about one hour ago with a 'good morning ' and two sweet emoticons blowing me a heart kiss. Of course I melted. This is all what I ask and crave, it's not much is it?
Luckily I was online on the phone when the message came through and showed on the screen. I didn't need to open it and I won't. Not sure if he read the email before sending me this message. I guess I will never know. But he is behaving like nothing happened last night and hey maybe for him it didn't, I don't expect you Earth people to swim along with me and even begin to understand my underwater world. It's not very appealing anway. Keep on the green grass, where the flowers are beautiful, the trees offer you shade and the soil smells life.
It's suffocating deep down there where I live.
Obviously, if he cares, there is also the scope to explain, and try to reconnect but if my gut feeling is right, he will just let me go.
I gave him a gift, I made it so easy for him to be true to himself and myself and end things in a loving manner with no drama or hard feelings (we spoke about it right in the beginning). If he can't really do this he knows he can just be silent and I will understand and leave it alone.
Either way, I have so much passion, I can't bottle up. I had to express myself last night. Probably I went against all the professional dating programs advice that I have been hooked up to lately. Fuck it. I needed to be me. I wasn't being the real me lately, for fear of losing his attention and attraction, and it didn't work anyway. Being the real me is the best option. If he can't take it so it wasn't to be.
Maybe I will post the email here later and see what you guys think. You guys are so full of wisdom. I appreciate all the advice. Taurus you really are a great sign. You lucky ones!
Anyway he messaged me about one hour ago with a 'good morning ' and two sweet emoticons blowing me a heart kiss. Of course I melted. This is all what I ask and crave, it's not much is it?
Luckily I was online on the phone when the message came through and showed on the screen. I didn't need to open it and I won't. Not sure if he read the email before sending me this message. I guess I will never know. But he is behaving like nothing happened last night and hey maybe for him it didn't, I don't expect you Earth people to swim along with me and even begin to understand my underwater world. It's not very appealing anway. Keep on the green grass, where the flowers are beautiful, the trees offer you shade and the soil smells life.
It's suffocating deep down there where I live.
Busyeyes thanks for your opinion.
You are spot on. That's exactly how I feel: receiving crumbs.
It was so different in the beginning I don't understand how or when it all went wrong. But it did.
It's over in my heart, I know there is no coming back from this, the magic is gone.
It's 'up to him' to do his part of the ending gracefully or ugly. As I said, he bids farewell nicely or disappear like a ghost. My email was loving and said it all (or so I think).
Anyway new life now. Clean water.
I know I'm far from ready to have any kind of relationship, I knew it all along and I told him right from the beginning. I guess he needed a challenge and some sex. Not blaming him. I'm responsible for my own actions and weaknesses.
It hurts. But I will emerge eventually.
Thanks ALL for listening.
You are spot on. That's exactly how I feel: receiving crumbs.
It was so different in the beginning I don't understand how or when it all went wrong. But it did.
It's over in my heart, I know there is no coming back from this, the magic is gone.
It's 'up to him' to do his part of the ending gracefully or ugly. As I said, he bids farewell nicely or disappear like a ghost. My email was loving and said it all (or so I think).
Anyway new life now. Clean water.
I know I'm far from ready to have any kind of relationship, I knew it all along and I told him right from the beginning. I guess he needed a challenge and some sex. Not blaming him. I'm responsible for my own actions and weaknesses.
It hurts. But I will emerge eventually.
Thanks ALL for listening.
Update:
Taurus called me to talk about the email. He said he wasn't aware I was feeling neglected. He admits he hasn't had much space in his head for the relationship at the moment.
He explained exactly what is going on in his life, massive problems (included financial problems).
I know he was having a hard time but I had no idea it was that bad. In short, he made a huge mistake in his main business/income and is expecting to earn only half of the money he usually does. Not only that, because of political issues in the country he is living now, his new business is in stand still because no one is moving or signing anything until the politics are resolved. He was supposed to launch end of November and now is predicting February.
He asked if I could forgive and at times were emotional. He said he cried whilst reading my email.
He guaranteed there is nobody else and said that unfortunately at the moment he can't offer much in terms of time and attention as he need all his concentration in solving his professional mess but he is still interested and committed. He wanted to make sure I am not feeling insecure anymore and at any time if I feel down and can call and talk things through.
He also said he will reply to the email one day.
Well, I believed.
Taurus called me to talk about the email. He said he wasn't aware I was feeling neglected. He admits he hasn't had much space in his head for the relationship at the moment.
He explained exactly what is going on in his life, massive problems (included financial problems).
I know he was having a hard time but I had no idea it was that bad. In short, he made a huge mistake in his main business/income and is expecting to earn only half of the money he usually does. Not only that, because of political issues in the country he is living now, his new business is in stand still because no one is moving or signing anything until the politics are resolved. He was supposed to launch end of November and now is predicting February.
He asked if I could forgive and at times were emotional. He said he cried whilst reading my email.
He guaranteed there is nobody else and said that unfortunately at the moment he can't offer much in terms of time and attention as he need all his concentration in solving his professional mess but he is still interested and committed. He wanted to make sure I am not feeling insecure anymore and at any time if I feel down and can call and talk things through.
He also said he will reply to the email one day.
Well, I believed.
We talked a lot on the phone and he answered all my questions and more. I guess it was difficult to him spelling out all of his business / financial troubles specially because it was all created by him, his mistake. Even though he had nothing to with the political happenings in the country he is in, he decided to move there and open this new business venture, it was a gamble that probably won't pay off. He is feeling very bad at the moment, he always worked for himself and he is now at a crucial point, when his stability and future is in jeopardy.
My email hit him hard and made him cry. He thought it was poetic and touching. We spoke about every single detail on the email but he wants to give it a proper written reply when he has more head space. I know it could take a long time and I don't mind. I had all the replies from his mouth already. He didn't use his problem as an excuse, he asked if I could find in my heart to forgive him and I had every right to feel the way I did. He was sorry he made me feel that way.
Anyway, it took a lot of pressure over my shoulder and I am tranquil. Even if the relationship dissolves now I know it is because of distance / wrong timing / life problems, not because of other woman or because he is a player. The connection was real.
Since I have a lot of work needing doing on myself, I will carry on improving my personality and not dating anybody else because this whole thing proved to me I am not ready anyway.
In my mind this is now a platonic romantic friendship.
I wish I could help him and I pray things improve soon for hid own benefit. It must be very hard going through what he is going through right now.
My email hit him hard and made him cry. He thought it was poetic and touching. We spoke about every single detail on the email but he wants to give it a proper written reply when he has more head space. I know it could take a long time and I don't mind. I had all the replies from his mouth already. He didn't use his problem as an excuse, he asked if I could find in my heart to forgive him and I had every right to feel the way I did. He was sorry he made me feel that way.
Anyway, it took a lot of pressure over my shoulder and I am tranquil. Even if the relationship dissolves now I know it is because of distance / wrong timing / life problems, not because of other woman or because he is a player. The connection was real.
Since I have a lot of work needing doing on myself, I will carry on improving my personality and not dating anybody else because this whole thing proved to me I am not ready anyway.
In my mind this is now a platonic romantic friendship.
I wish I could help him and I pray things improve soon for hid own benefit. It must be very hard going through what he is going through right now.
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Then he calls in the morning and I don't answer but I message straight away to explain why I can't take his call (I was having a medical checkup).
I do want to talk to him and ideally use skype which needs to be done late in the night after my daughter is asleep (his timezone is 2 hours ahead).
Do I call when convenient for me or do I just wait for him to contact me again?
He has been very busy lately and this impacted communication, which hurt me a lot, should I let him sweat now or would it be seen as game playing?