Another issue with same Virgo man šŸ¤¦šŸ¾ā€ā™€ļø

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Profile picture of Missscorpio30
Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Okay I have a dilemma. I had a causal relationship with a Virgo man but kept breaking off the relationship with mean text threatening not to call anymore and saying I was fed up. Usually it last for a few days and I call him back everything is fine. We broke it off for a few months because even though I said I only wanted to be friends I couldn’t deal with him saying he is keeping his options open but I still called him to talk sometimes. Before the split we went on dates weekly when we had sex it was good he held my hands and looked into my soul and I met his daughter. So we reconnected and started back this friendship and he seemed distant. He told me he was having issues and was talking to a therapist he said the therapist said he should talk to some one who makes him feel bad about the way he treats them. This happened after I sent an emotional text ending everything again but talked it out and was back on. He apologized for his behavior and so did I. The thing is he doesn’t call me and show me enough attention. We use to talk and text daily but he is withdrawn I know he is having issues but I’m just couldn’t deal with his new behavior so I sent another text breaking things off he explained he was sick and sleep but I still kept it going and said I wasn’t going to call anymore. I got over it and called him again and tried to talk he said he was in a bad area so he couldn’t talk I felt some kind of way so I sent him a long text expressing how he is treating me unfairly and how I feel about him and what I should do is leave him alone. This time he told me he couldn’t deal with this emotional rollercoaster and we should go our separate ways. I agreed but now I feel really sad. We have a good connection and he is what I want in a man. Should I move on or try to win him back?
Profile picture of AbbyNormal
AbbyNormal
@AbbyNormal
12 Years5,000+ PostsTaurus

Comments: 14265 Ā· Posts: 5321 Ā· Topics: 61
Leave the poor man alone and work on yourself. That is not healthy behavior at all. It seems like he is trying towards a more positive life. If you care for him, you will let him do what he needs to do and stop barfing all of your reactions and emotions on him. Seriously reel yourself in girl. You will only push ANYONE farther away with that kind of attention seeking behavior. You need to consider his feelings just as much as your own if you want any relationship to work. Your emotions are not the most important or only ones in the world--try to keep that in mind. Work on controlling yourself bc trying to control others never works for either party.
Profile picture of Missscorpio30
Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by AbbyNormal

Leave the poor man alone and work on yourself. That is not healthy behavior at all. It seems like he is trying towards a more positive life. If you care for him, you will let him do what he needs to do and stop barfing all of your reactions and emotions on him. Seriously reel yourself in girl. You will only push ANYONE farther away with that kind of attention seeking behavior. You need to consider his feelings just as much as your own if you want any relationship to work. Your emotions are not the most important or only ones in the world--try to keep that in mind. Work on controlling yourself bc trying to control others never works for either party.


Yes I agree I am working on myself. It’s so bad and embarrassing I wish I could have a do over
Profile picture of AbbyNormal
AbbyNormal
@AbbyNormal
12 Years5,000+ PostsTaurus

Comments: 14265 Ā· Posts: 5321 Ā· Topics: 61
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by AbbyNormal

Leave the poor man alone and work on yourself. That is not healthy behavior at all. It seems like he is trying towards a more positive life. If you care for him, you will let him do what he needs to do and stop barfing all of your reactions and emotions on him. Seriously reel yourself in girl. You will only push ANYONE farther away with that kind of attention seeking behavior. You need to consider his feelings just as much as your own if you want any relationship to work. Your emotions are not the most important or only ones in the world--try to keep that in mind. Work on controlling yourself bc trying to control others never works for either party.

Yes I agree I am working on myself. It’s so bad and embarrassing I wish I could have a do over
click to expand



I say this out of love bc I can relate.... Im sorry but make sure you take whatever lessons you can from this. Who knows what the future brings? All you can do is prepare yourself to be the best partner you can be when the time does come! And it will ☺
Profile picture of Missscorpio30
Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by AbbyNormal
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by AbbyNormal

Leave the poor man alone and work on yourself. That is not healthy behavior at all. It seems like he is trying towards a more positive life. If you care for him, you will let him do what he needs to do and stop barfing all of your reactions and emotions on him. Seriously reel yourself in girl. You will only push ANYONE farther away with that kind of attention seeking behavior. You need to consider his feelings just as much as your own if you want any relationship to work. Your emotions are not the most important or only ones in the world--try to keep that in mind. Work on controlling yourself bc trying to control others never works for either party.

Yes I agree I am working on myself. It’s so bad and embarrassing I wish I could have a do over

I say this out of love bc I can relate.... Im sorry but make sure you take whatever lessons you can from this. Who knows what the future brings? All you can do is prepare yourself to be the best partner you can be when the time does come! And it will ☺
click to expand



Thanks and yes I will I just wanted it to be with him. It’s so sad I just don’t understand why I have these emotional reactions I don’t want to control him I just want him to act normal again. I don’t like the change in him
Profile picture of Gemitati
Gemitati
@Gemitati
10 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 2057 Ā· Posts: 38091 Ā· Topics: 1026
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by Gemitati

If you have masochist inclinations - proceed!

What does that mean? Lol

Your story seems like a self torture.

If you like it - go ahead. Seems like you can deal with this.

I don’t want to torture myself and no I can’t deal with it I want this to be healthy
click to expand



It can’t be healthy!

It screams ā€˜sick’ all the way!!

Read your own post. What seems like possible to change? I don’t see a thing...
Profile picture of LibraSupreme
LibraSupreme
@LibraSupreme
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 84 Ā· Posts: 1361 Ā· Topics: 0
Posted by AbbyNormal
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by AbbyNormal

Leave the poor man alone and work on yourself. That is not healthy behavior at all. It seems like he is trying towards a more positive life. If you care for him, you will let him do what he needs to do and stop barfing all of your reactions and emotions on him. Seriously reel yourself in girl. You will only push ANYONE farther away with that kind of attention seeking behavior. You need to consider his feelings just as much as your own if you want any relationship to work. Your emotions are not the most important or only ones in the world--try to keep that in mind. Work on controlling yourself bc trying to control others never works for either party.

Yes I agree I am working on myself. It’s so bad and embarrassing I wish I could have a do over

I say this out of love bc I can relate.... Im sorry but make sure you take whatever lessons you can from this. Who knows what the future brings? All you can do is prepare yourself to be the best partner you can be when the time does come! And it will ☺
click to expand



Lol.... the desperate Scorpio traits aren't going to give up on him. She will be the doormat to get him back. Same story I've seen a million times. You just got to love weak girls for what there good for.
Profile picture of Missscorpio30
Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by LibraSupreme
Posted by AbbyNormal
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by AbbyNormal

Leave the poor man alone and work on yourself. That is not healthy behavior at all. It seems like he is trying towards a more positive life. If you care for him, you will let him do what he needs to do and stop barfing all of your reactions and emotions on him. Seriously reel yourself in girl. You will only push ANYONE farther away with that kind of attention seeking behavior. You need to consider his feelings just as much as your own if you want any relationship to work. Your emotions are not the most important or only ones in the world--try to keep that in mind. Work on controlling yourself bc trying to control others never works for either party.

Yes I agree I am working on myself. It’s so bad and embarrassing I wish I could have a do over

I say this out of love bc I can relate.... Im sorry but make sure you take whatever lessons you can from this. Who knows what the future brings? All you can do is prepare yourself to be the best partner you can be when the time does come! And it will ☺

Lol.... the desperate Scorpio traits aren't going to give up on him. She will be the doormat to get him back. Same story I've seen a million times. You just got to love weak girls for what there good for

I guess so but it’s life šŸ¤·šŸ½ā€ā™€ļø Every woman has been weak for a man before I’m no different then the billions of woman on this planet
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Profile picture of saggurl88
Vacation Queen
@saggurl88
12 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 22238 Ā· Posts: 25616 Ā· Topics: 84
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by 777
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by 777

Scorpios try to act rational, but be irrational af.

This whole situation is irrational.

He should man up & cut u loose

He did

Problem solved

No I’m working on my behavior and I like him
click to expand



You’re not gonna be able to control his behavior though. So how are you gonna handle his inconsistent behavior?

He’s gonna pull back more and more cause you aren’t changing, and you probably won’t be able to either.

I think the disappearing and lack of communication is a part of the sign in general, it’s what most have a problem with. So you either work with him or leave him alone. You guys are torturing each other at this point.
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Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
We talked and he said we will always be cool but maybe we shouldn’t have sex. He seemed eager to talk to me it’s just so confusing with him it’s been a year since we started talking and I don’t understand why he acts like this maybe I should just break it off I’m too fragile for his coldness no matter how much I crave this man something is missing and he is too confusing
Profile picture of Missscorpio30
Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
We talked and he said we will always be cool but maybe we shouldn’t have sex. He seemed eager to talk to me it’s just so confusing with him it’s been a year since we started talking and I don’t understand why he acts like this maybe I should just break it off I’m too fragile for his coldness no matter how much I crave this man something is missing and he is too confusing
Profile picture of CapAqu
CapAqu
@CapAqu
6 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 3 Ā· Topics: 1
I can understand what you feel, I am an Aquarius in love with a Virgo man. My experience is that when he needs space and time you have to give it to him. And yes it hurts me sometimes but I know if I don’t give him the space he needs it will hurt me even more. When he tells me that he doesn’t feel like talking, I always tell him ā€˜ok as you prefer, should you change your mind I am here’ he always comes back to me in a mater of a few hours max 12 hours. When he’s back he is happy and interested about me, he is making me laugh and treating me nice. Believe me it’s worth to be patient with them. If you cannot be patient than this game is not for you. I also think that for a Virgo knowing that someone is waiting for him, gives him a feeling of security and increases his trust in you. Just think about it for a moment, if you don’t feel like talking to someone, would you be happy if that person would tell you ok go on your way and I will take mine? Where is the understanding and care for the personal space of your loved one. Do you really love him if you don’t respect his privacy?
Profile picture of Missscorpio30
Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by CapAqu

I can understand what you feel, I am an Aquarius in love with a Virgo man. My experience is that when he needs space and time you have to give it to him. And yes it hurts me sometimes but I know if I don’t give him the space he needs it will hurt me even more. When he tells me that he doesn’t feel like talking, I always tell him ā€˜ok as you prefer, should you change your mind I am here’ he always comes back to me in a mater of a few hours max 12 hours. When he’s back he is happy and interested about me, he is making me laugh and treating me nice. Believe me it’s worth to be patient with them. If you cannot be patient than this game is not for you. I also think that for a Virgo knowing that someone is waiting for him, gives him a feeling of security and increases his trust in you. Just think about it for a moment, if you don’t feel like talking to someone, would you be happy if that person would tell you ok go on your way and I will take mine? Where is the understanding and care for the personal space of your loved one. Do you really love him if you don’t respect his privacy?

This brought tears to my eyes. It’s true he needs his space and I try to give it to him but my own needs cloud my judgement I just want to talk to him all the time and have his attention. It’s crazy I know but he just so amazing when we are together I can’t get enough of him. He always tell me that it’s nothing against me when he wants space just some stuff he has to work out We talked and texted him that I can’t just leave him all alone forever but will wait it out for him my biggest fear is him finding someone else from all this space he requires but now it’s no under my control I can just hope for the best and stop trying to control him. He said we will always be cool but sex confused things and I take it personal when he is busy I don’t believe him though because the feeling he show me when we are alone can not just go away I can admit I hurt him with words and ending things all the time but this time I will prove myself that I’m not immature and can deal with his life he owns a trucking company so he works non stop I wish I could be there for him all the time but for I’m going to give him his space. Thanks for the comment
Profile picture of Missscorpio30
Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30

Okay I have a dilemma. I had a causal relationship with a Virgo man but kept breaking off the relationship with mean text threatening not to call anymore and saying I was fed up. Usually it last for a few days and I call him back everything is fine. We broke it off for a few months because even though I said I only wanted to be friends I couldn’t deal with him saying he is keeping his options open but I still called him to talk sometimes. Before the split we went on dates weekly when we had sex it was good he held my hands and looked into my soul and I met his daughter. So we reconnected and started back this friendship and he seemed distant. He told me he was having issues and was talking to a therapist he said the therapist said he should talk to some one who makes him feel bad about the way he treats them. This happened after I sent an emotional text ending everything again but talked it out and was back on. He apologized for his behavior and so did I. The thing is he doesn’t call me and show me enough attention. We use to talk and text daily but he is withdrawn I know he is having issues but I’m just couldn’t deal with his new behavior so I sent another text breaking things off he explained he was sick and sleep but I still kept it going and said I wasn’t going to call anymore. I got over it and called him again and tried to talk he said he was in a bad area so he couldn’t talk I felt some kind of way so I sent him a long text expressing how he is treating me unfairly and how I feel about him and what I should do is leave him alone. This time he told me he couldn’t deal with this emotional rollercoaster and we should go our separate ways. I agreed but now I feel really sad. We have a good connection and he is what I want in a man. Should I move on or try to win him back?

No. You dear, need therapy. Seriously get help. That shit is toxic as fuck.

Seriously holy hell. Get help to figure out your shit, if you ever want a chance of real happiness in life. Kuddos for openly posting. Now go Talk to a professional. It will be the best thing you have ever done for yourself. You will not regret it.

Troll post of the Year award if this is fake. @-dazed is that you?
click to expand



To be honest I’m thinking of trying counseling again and to work on my possessive behavior the thing is no man has ever complained about my behavior so i never knew it was a issue until now! Most men love to talk to me all day and see me all the time and in the beginning of this he was the same way until I start threatening to leave. I’m emotional and entitled so I am working on that
Profile picture of AbbyNormal
AbbyNormal
@AbbyNormal
12 Years5,000+ PostsTaurus

Comments: 14265 Ā· Posts: 5321 Ā· Topics: 61
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30

Okay I have a dilemma. I had a causal relationship with a Virgo man but kept breaking off the relationship with mean text threatening not to call anymore and saying I was fed up. Usually it last for a few days and I call him back everything is fine. We broke it off for a few months because even though I said I only wanted to be friends I couldn’t deal with him saying he is keeping his options open but I still called him to talk sometimes. Before the split we went on dates weekly when we had sex it was good he held my hands and looked into my soul and I met his daughter. So we reconnected and started back this friendship and he seemed distant. He told me he was having issues and was talking to a therapist he said the therapist said he should talk to some one who makes him feel bad about the way he treats them. This happened after I sent an emotional text ending everything again but talked it out and was back on. He apologized for his behavior and so did I. The thing is he doesn’t call me and show me enough attention. We use to talk and text daily but he is withdrawn I know he is having issues but I’m just couldn’t deal with his new behavior so I sent another text breaking things off he explained he was sick and sleep but I still kept it going and said I wasn’t going to call anymore. I got over it and called him again and tried to talk he said he was in a bad area so he couldn’t talk I felt some kind of way so I sent him a long text expressing how he is treating me unfairly and how I feel about him and what I should do is leave him alone. This time he told me he couldn’t deal with this emotional rollercoaster and we should go our separate ways. I agreed but now I feel really sad. We have a good connection and he is what I want in a man. Should I move on or try to win him back?

No. You dear, need therapy. Seriously get help. That shit is toxic as fuck.

Seriously holy hell. Get help to figure out your shit, if you ever want a chance of real happiness in life. Kuddos for openly posting. Now go Talk to a professional. It will be the best thing you have ever done for yourself. You will not regret it.

Troll post of the Year award if this is fake. @-dazed is that you?

To be honest I’m thinking of trying counseling again and to work on my possessive behavior the thing is no man has ever complained about my behavior so i never knew it was a issue until now! Most men love to talk to me all day and see me all the time and in the beginning of this he was the same way until I start threatening to leave. I’m emotional and entitled so I am working on that

There is nothing wrong with being possesive and demanding but not to those extremes your doing. You have serious insecurity and abandonment issues.

The reason your finding people that are ok with it because they like like it (for a time) or they have issues themselves so it works.l Kinda like fitting puzzle pieces together. If it didn't fit it wouldn't happen in the first place. Does that make sense?

Don't just "try". Do it. It's will be difficult mentally and emotionally for you. At some point in therapy you will have to acknowledge things that are hard to swallow about yourself. Open up old wounds to find the origin of your behavior. Above all you will have to own up to things that are your fault. Even though you were acting out of ignorance of the concequences and of yourself. That last one most people can't handle it and they snap back to their old selves because it's actually quite painful.

Changing the way you think and view things is difficult. A part of yourself will rebel and try to stop you with bullshit excuses and rationalizations. No fucking joke. I don't remember the pyschlogical term but it's real.

Like I said before, kiddos for recognizing you have issues. Don't fall for your own bullshit excuses, delay tactics, and other people, who I gauentee are around you, stopping you from handling this. Make plans follow through. Make it a priority. Get it done.
click to expand



+šŸ’Æ
Profile picture of Missscorpio30
Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30

Okay I have a dilemma. I had a causal relationship with a Virgo man but kept breaking off the relationship with mean text threatening not to call anymore and saying I was fed up. Usually it last for a few days and I call him back everything is fine. We broke it off for a few months because even though I said I only wanted to be friends I couldn’t deal with him saying he is keeping his options open but I still called him to talk sometimes. Before the split we went on dates weekly when we had sex it was good he held my hands and looked into my soul and I met his daughter. So we reconnected and started back this friendship and he seemed distant. He told me he was having issues and was talking to a therapist he said the therapist said he should talk to some one who makes him feel bad about the way he treats them. This happened after I sent an emotional text ending everything again but talked it out and was back on. He apologized for his behavior and so did I. The thing is he doesn’t call me and show me enough attention. We use to talk and text daily but he is withdrawn I know he is having issues but I’m just couldn’t deal with his new behavior so I sent another text breaking things off he explained he was sick and sleep but I still kept it going and said I wasn’t going to call anymore. I got over it and called him again and tried to talk he said he was in a bad area so he couldn’t talk I felt some kind of way so I sent him a long text expressing how he is treating me unfairly and how I feel about him and what I should do is leave him alone. This time he told me he couldn’t deal with this emotional rollercoaster and we should go our separate ways. I agreed but now I feel really sad. We have a good connection and he is what I want in a man. Should I move on or try to win him back?

No. You dear, need therapy. Seriously get help. That shit is toxic as fuck.

Seriously holy hell. Get help to figure out your shit, if you ever want a chance of real happiness in life. Kuddos for openly posting. Now go Talk to a professional. It will be the best thing you have ever done for yourself. You will not regret it.

Troll post of the Year award if this is fake. @-dazed is that you?

To be honest I’m thinking of trying counseling again and to work on my possessive behavior the thing is no man has ever complained about my behavior so i never knew it was a issue until now! Most men love to talk to me all day and see me all the time and in the beginning of this he was the same way until I start threatening to leave. I’m emotional and entitled so I am working on that

There is nothing wrong with being possesive and demanding but not to those extremes your doing. You have serious insecurity and abandonment issues.

The reason your finding people that are ok with it because they like like it (for a time) or they have issues themselves so it works.l Kinda like fitting puzzle pieces together. If it didn't fit it wouldn't happen in the first place. Does that make sense?

Don't just "try". Do it. It's will be difficult mentally and emotionally for you. At some point in therapy you will have to acknowledge things that are hard to swallow about yourself. Open up old wounds to find the origin of your behavior. Above all you will have to own up to things that are your fault. Even though you were acting out of ignorance of the concequences and of yourself. That last one most people can't handle it and they snap back to their old selves because it's actually quite painful.

Changing the way you think and view things is difficult. A part of yourself will rebel and try to stop you with bullshit excuses and rationalizations. No fucking joke. I don't remember the pyschlogical term but it's real.

Like I said before, kiddos for recognizing you have issues. Don't fall for your own bullshit excuses, delay tactics, and other people, who I gauentee are around you, stopping you from handling this. Make plans follow through. Make it a priority. Get it done.
click to expand



I hear you but I’m not insecure at all but I do have abandonment and trust issues. I am working on these issues daily so it’s no excuses just trying to understand myself more. Everyone has some type of issue so it’s frustrating when someone can not accept mines I’m not trying to tute my own horn but I see myself as pretty much doing the right thing at all times and this one part of my life is deal breaker. That’s hurts me the most it’s not fair to me. I’m educated a hard worker I look good and take care of myself my body isn’t perfect but it’s never been a issue with men or me. This situation has shown me that maybe he is not the one I have guys calling to hangout talk whenever I want go on dates and everything so it’s crazy that this one guy says all the right things sometimes but is just not into me. When we are together it feels almost perfect I just don’t understand what it is. What’s the issue I not making excuses but I start this behavior after he does something insensitive to me granted I could express myself in a better way but it’s just not fair and today I have been thinking hard about this and feel like maybe I should just leave him alone. We have talked and it seems like he is just looking for something different and I was there for fun I can’t explain why he did things to make me fall for him this was definitely not a hit it and quick it situation so maybe my behavior changed him but whenever it was I just think now it’s not working anymore. I’m alone right now and where is he? Some where with a separate life from me and I don’t think I can deal with that. I need someone who can be present in my life and there for me emotionally maybe it’s Virgo men in general but I have never had to behave like this before. Men in the past just understands me. Maybe I’m better with water sign men who can understand my sensitivity or maybe he is just not that into me so he is just acting out how he feels inside. That’s the dilemma I’m facing I don’t know what it means. He sent me a reply after I apologized for my behavior and told him I didn’t want to feel less than. And his behavior makes me feel like he is some where else giving another woman who feels deserve his time and attention He told me: Good morning. You are not less than. Don’t say or think that. I know this is long but I’m just at the point where I’m tired of the back and forth I really just want to be happy with him. I’m very happy alone this year I hit all

Of my professional goals just wish I my personal life can come together now
Profile picture of Missscorpio30
Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30

Okay I have a dilemma. I had a causal relationship with a Virgo man but kept breaking off the relationship with mean text threatening not to call anymore and saying I was fed up. Usually it last for a few days and I call him back everything is fine. We broke it off for a few months because even though I said I only wanted to be friends I couldn’t deal with him saying he is keeping his options open but I still called him to talk sometimes. Before the split we went on dates weekly when we had sex it was good he held my hands and looked into my soul and I met his daughter. So we reconnected and started back this friendship and he seemed distant. He told me he was having issues and was talking to a therapist he said the therapist said he should talk to some one who makes him feel bad about the way he treats them. This happened after I sent an emotional text ending everything again but talked it out and was back on. He apologized for his behavior and so did I. The thing is he doesn’t call me and show me enough attention. We use to talk and text daily but he is withdrawn I know he is having issues but I’m just couldn’t deal with his new behavior so I sent another text breaking things off he explained he was sick and sleep but I still kept it going and said I wasn’t going to call anymore. I got over it and called him again and tried to talk he said he was in a bad area so he couldn’t talk I felt some kind of way so I sent him a long text expressing how he is treating me unfairly and how I feel about him and what I should do is leave him alone. This time he told me he couldn’t deal with this emotional rollercoaster and we should go our separate ways. I agreed but now I feel really sad. We have a good connection and he is what I want in a man. Should I move on or try to win him back?

No. You dear, need therapy. Seriously get help. That shit is toxic as fuck.

Seriously holy hell. Get help to figure out your shit, if you ever want a chance of real happiness in life. Kuddos for openly posting. Now go Talk to a professional. It will be the best thing you have ever done for yourself. You will not regret it.

Troll post of the Year award if this is fake. @-dazed is that you?

To be honest I’m thinking of trying counseling again and to work on my possessive behavior the thing is no man has ever complained about my behavior so i never knew it was a issue until now! Most men love to talk to me all day and see me all the time and in the beginning of this he was the same way until I start threatening to leave. I’m emotional and entitled so I am working on that

There is nothing wrong with being possesive and demanding but not to those extremes your doing. You have serious insecurity and abandonment issues.

The reason your finding people that are ok with it because they like like it (for a time) or they have issues themselves so it works.l Kinda like fitting puzzle pieces together. If it didn't fit it wouldn't happen in the first place. Does that make sense?

Don't just "try". Do it. It's will be difficult mentally and emotionally for you. At some point in therapy you will have to acknowledge things that are hard to swallow about yourself. Open up old wounds to find the origin of your behavior. Above all you will have to own up to things that are your fault. Even though you were acting out of ignorance of the concequences and of yourself. That last one most people can't handle it and they snap back to their old selves because it's actually quite painful.

Changing the way you think and view things is difficult. A part of yourself will rebel and try to stop you with bullshit excuses and rationalizations. No fucking joke. I don't remember the pyschlogical term but it's real.

Like I said before, kiddos for recognizing you have issues. Don't fall for your own bullshit excuses, delay tactics, and other people, who I gauentee are around you, stopping you from handling this. Make plans follow through. Make it a priority. Get it done.

I hear you but I’m not insecure at all but I do have abandonment and trust issues. I am working on these issues daily so it’s no excuses just trying to understand myself more. Everyone has some type of issue so it’s frustrating when someone can not accept mines I’m not trying to tute my own horn but I see myself as pretty much doing the right thing at all times and this one part of my life is deal breaker. That’s hurts me the most it’s not fair to me. I’m educated a hard worker I look good and take care of myself my body isn’t perfect but it’s never been a issue with men or me. This situation has shown me that maybe he is not the one I have guys calling to hangout talk whenever I want go on dates and everything so it’s crazy that this one guy says all the right things sometimes but is just not into me. When we are together it feels almost perfect I just don’t understand what it is. What’s the issue I not making excuses but I start this behavior after he does something insensitive to me granted I could express myself in a better way but it’s just not fair and today I have been thinking hard about this and feel like maybe I should just leave him alone. We have talked and it seems like he is just looking for something different and I was there for fun I can’t explain why he did things to make me fall for him this was definitely not a hit it and quick it situation so maybe my behavior changed him but whenever it was I just think now it’s not working anymore. I’m alone right now and where is he? Some where with a separate life from me and I don’t think I can deal with that. I need someone who can be present in my life and there for me emotionally maybe it’s Virgo men in general but I have never had to behave like this before. Men in the past just understands me. Maybe I’m better with water sign men who can understand my sensitivity or maybe he is just not that into me so he is just acting out how he feels inside. That’s the dilemma I’m facing I don’t know what it means. He sent me a reply after I apologized for my behavior and told him I didn’t want to feel less than. And his behavior makes me feel like he is some where else giving another woman who feels deserve his time and attention He told me: Good morning. You are not less than. Don’t say or think that. I know this is long but I’m just at the point where I’m tired of the back and forth I really just want to be happy with him. I’m very happy alone this year I hit all

Of my professional goals just wish I my personal life can come together now

I'm a virgo please don't lump us all altogether. Nor should you base everything around the sun sign if you use astrology. Someone with water would be more intuitive with you sure. What earth can give water above all else is stability and consistence. Once you get them to commit. You said "casual" relationship dilimma. Your dilimma is actually you want a "serious" one.

You don't sound as bad as I expected. You do recognize you have a trigger though that's great. The trick to triggers is acknowledging it and recognizing not every past situation that caused that will be and end up the same as the current situation.

It sounds like you want someone who you feel is really part of your life. Serious, fully engages you, and is committed. No half assing lol

"Everyone has some type of issue so it’s frustrating when someone can not accept mines"

-Because your piticular issue is unhealthy and destructive for you and them longer term. It's not just about him either. You will run into this problem again. Once again there is nothing wrong with what you want. It's the extremes and how you act when you get triggered.

"I start this behavior after he does something insensitive to me granted I could express myself in a better way but it’s just not fair and today I have been thinking hard about this and feel like maybe I should just leave him alone"

- your overly sensitive about something and react badly. That's a Fact. Don't rationalize it, Don't run from it, and most importantly don't accept this behavior from yourself. First step.

"And his behavior makes me feel like he is some where else giving another woman who feels deserve his time and attention"

- because if you acted that way that would be the reason you would? Or from what you know about him and his past relationship history? Or just a true gut feeling that his attention is starting to wonder away from you, which maybe true but doesn't mean another woman. There can be other reasons for sure.





Could you explain what did he say or do to trigger you? The insensitive action or behavior?

Also you recognize you could have handled it a better way. How did you handle it verse what you think would be a better way next time?
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What tigger me is when he does not check up on me for a whole day. It’s so crazy like are you interested or not. Before the break we took for a couple months we solved the issue and we talked every other day and he text me when he hasn’t heard from me but I got upset when he took a trip out of the country but did not invite me so I broke it off. It was my biggest mistake because that when he turned to this behavior he has now. Days could go by and he doesn’t call but when I call him he say stuff like I was expecting to hear from u Friday!
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Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
That Type of stuff is what caused me to tell him I will leave him alone because why won’t he call me if he was sitting there waiting on my phone call? He apologized but did the same thing again days go by and nothing I don’t hear from here and when ever I get upset he says how he was sick or something was going on. I believe him but wish he could of checked in. I don’t think he is some type of player or anything but I just don’t get why he doesn’t call me. The insensitive behavior is him not inviting me places or checking on me. I think now i just don’t care and I know he needs his space so I have to basically act single until he comes around. I use to get just ask about his day and pretend to be happy or just threaten to leave him and make him explain his behavior
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Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30

That Type of stuff is what caused me to tell him I will leave him alone because why won’t he call me if he was sitting there waiting on my phone call? He apologized but did the same thing again days go by and nothing I don’t hear from here and when ever I get upset he says how he was sick or something was going on. I believe him but wish he could of checked in. I don’t think he is some type of player or anything but I just don’t get why he doesn’t call me. The insensitive behavior is him not inviting me places or checking on me. I think now i just don’t care and I know he needs his space so I have to basically act single until he comes around. I use to get just ask about his day and pretend to be happy or just threaten to leave him and make him explain his behavior

Ok. Clearer picture of what's going on. You are ready/want something serious with him and his behavior says otherwise and is triggering you negatively. You also make it sound like he is f' with you.

Let him go even if just for now. Take a break from each other. If he is really serious about you he will reach out and chase periodically.

Again.Get therapy for your issue or you risk running into this again every time you transition from casual to serious relationship. At the very least you will be able to rule out your own issues and be able to drop guys, with confidence, who legitimately Don't want to get serious with you rather then you snapping and sabotaging the relationship. Very very very important you do this, Scorpio. Scorpio woman are awesome and there is nothing like Scorpio love. You can be very fustrating though when you get insecure.

All that aside. Could you answer the question: how could you have responded better to his lack of intentiveness and distance vs. what YOU did?
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Again I don’t have these issues in my relationships he is the first one to act like this! Any other time it’s me begging for space I was married to another Scorpio for 10 years before him and never had to deal with this and I think I could of just let him be and waited for him to call and joking threaten him like I always do lol or simply just moved on without a explanation like most woman do.
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Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30

That Type of stuff is what caused me to tell him I will leave him alone because why won’t he call me if he was sitting there waiting on my phone call? He apologized but did the same thing again days go by and nothing I don’t hear from here and when ever I get upset he says how he was sick or something was going on. I believe him but wish he could of checked in. I don’t think he is some type of player or anything but I just don’t get why he doesn’t call me. The insensitive behavior is him not inviting me places or checking on me. I think now i just don’t care and I know he needs his space so I have to basically act single until he comes around. I use to get just ask about his day and pretend to be happy or just threaten to leave him and make him explain his behavior

Ok. Clearer picture of what's going on. You are ready/want something serious with him and his behavior says otherwise and is triggering you negatively. You also make it sound like he is f' with you.

Let him go even if just for now. Take a break from each other. If he is really serious about you he will reach out and chase periodically.

Again.Get therapy for your issue or you risk running into this again every time you transition from casual to serious relationship. At the very least you will be able to rule out your own issues and be able to drop guys, with confidence, who legitimately Don't want to get serious with you rather then you snapping and sabotaging the relationship. Very very very important you do this, Scorpio. Scorpio woman are awesome and there is nothing like Scorpio love. You can be very fustrating though when you get insecure.

All that aside. Could you answer the question: how could you have responded better to his lack of intentiveness and distance vs. what YOU did?
click to expand



At this point if I give him space I would have to move on permanently. I have other guys after me and feel like I have it my all he is just not interested it hurts really bad because the sex was amazing and he was such a put together person. I miss him already but you are right it’s nothing like Scorpio love but he didn’t want it or me. That’s the conclusion I’m coming up with I gave it a whole year I’m emotionally drained and ready for something positive maybe he will meet the woman who makes him chase them but sadly it’s just not me
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Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30

That Type of stuff is what caused me to tell him I will leave him alone because why won’t he call me if he was sitting there waiting on my phone call? He apologized but did the same thing again days go by and nothing I don’t hear from here and when ever I get upset he says how he was sick or something was going on. I believe him but wish he could of checked in. I don’t think he is some type of player or anything but I just don’t get why he doesn’t call me. The insensitive behavior is him not inviting me places or checking on me. I think now i just don’t care and I know he needs his space so I have to basically act single until he comes around. I use to get just ask about his day and pretend to be happy or just threaten to leave him and make him explain his behavior

Ok. Clearer picture of what's going on. You are ready/want something serious with him and his behavior says otherwise and is triggering you negatively. You also make it sound like he is f' with you.

Let him go even if just for now. Take a break from each other. If he is really serious about you he will reach out and chase periodically.

Again.Get therapy for your issue or you risk running into this again every time you transition from casual to serious relationship. At the very least you will be able to rule out your own issues and be able to drop guys, with confidence, who legitimately Don't want to get serious with you rather then you snapping and sabotaging the relationship. Very very very important you do this, Scorpio. Scorpio woman are awesome and there is nothing like Scorpio love. You can be very fustrating though when you get insecure.

All that aside. Could you answer the question: how could you have responded better to his lack of intentiveness and distance vs. what YOU did?

At this point if I give him space I would have to move on permanently. I have other guys after me and feel like I have it my all he is just not interested it hurts really bad because the sex was amazing and he was such a put together person. I miss him already but you are right it’s nothing like Scorpio love but he didn’t want it or me. That’s the conclusion I’m coming up with I gave it a whole year I’m emotionally drained and ready for something positive maybe he will meet the woman who makes him chase them but sadly it’s just not me
click to expand



-*gave
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Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30

It’s not about me wanting something serious honestly I’m kinda cool with friend thing but he is not being friendly by leaving me hanging and not not checking up on me but expect me to do all the calling. I’m not asking for married just mutual interest

Here is the thing you say just friendly but your asking for something that is in the realm of serious. Romantic relationship or friendship are just a detailed description of a kind of relationship. Your asking for full engagement. That's serious. So yes it's a big deal to you and in general. If your asking this kind of investment and intentiveness from him in your relationship, you are making a move to a serious relationship. Not casual or just "friendly". Do you understand what I'm trying to get across?

Edit: this behavior and level of engagement might be a matter of fact/normal to you and other Scorpios but most other people it isn't. It's a milestone. The fact that you will drop him and go find someone else over this reinforces my point.

Do you know what projecting is in pyschology? It's basically where you imposse your own values, view points, and interpretations on others rather then there own personal version. Another way of saying it is you assume everyone thinks and acts like you.

Here watch this. It's not the exactly the video I was looking for but it's a start.





Let it sit with you for awhile and tell me what you think about it.
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That’s fine and all but he does not want anything with me it’s been a year. I can’t wait anymore I tried to be friends and then tried to be in a relationship because that’s what I thought he wanted but he said it’s not. I’m not projecting I’m just trying to be happy we had conversations about this and what we were comfortable doing as friends. After our last break up he said that we should go our separate ways and after that we talked and he said we should not have sex because I get offended when he doesn’t talk to me. I ask that we can come to a understanding and things will change a.k.a my behavior and he said he didn’t think so. He said we will always be cool so I said okay. He knows how I feel but just doesn’t not feel the same today I decided to just take what he is saying and just stop this I sent him this: Good Morning I woke up thinking about you and I have to say that even tho you have told me in every way possible that you just don’t want a relationship with me I just can’t shake the feeling you give me. I know what I feel when we are together but I also know my behavior pushed you away so at this time I’m going to just wait it out and focus on other things hopefully you will come around if you find someone else then I guess it’s for the best at-least you will be happy but I like you too much as a person to just give up. I wont contact you all the time and will give you your space but just know that I think you are such a special person and I wish we had a better understanding of each other because I do like you and want you in my life I don’t have feelings like this often and I know it means something even if you don’t.... but now I feel stupid and think I’m forcing this
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Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Maybe I made a mistake posting this blog. I feel terrible and alone his neglect is so hurtful because when he is around his affection is so strong and everything is perfect he would just change his behavior I think I can change mine what’s crazy is that I just want his attention sometimes and to feel important in his life it’s a shame I have to fight for that. That’s just not normal
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Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by greylatern
Posted by Missscorpio30

It’s not about me wanting something serious honestly I’m kinda cool with friend thing but he is not being friendly by leaving me hanging and not not checking up on me but expect me to do all the calling. I’m not asking for married just mutual interest

Here is the thing you say just friendly but your asking for something that is in the realm of serious. Romantic relationship or friendship are just a detailed description of a kind of relationship. Your asking for full engagement. That's serious. So yes it's a big deal to you and in general. If your asking this kind of investment and intentiveness from him in your relationship, you are making a move to a serious relationship. Not casual or just "friendly". Do you understand what I'm trying to get across?

Edit: this behavior and level of engagement might be a matter of fact/normal to you and other Scorpios but most other people it isn't. It's a milestone. The fact that you will drop him and go find someone else over this reinforces my point.

Do you know what projecting is in pyschology? It's basically where you imposse your own values, view points, and interpretations on others rather then there own personal version. Another way of saying it is you assume everyone thinks and acts like you.

Here watch this. It's not the exactly the video I was looking for but it's a start.





Let it sit with you for awhile and tell me what you think about it.

That’s fine and all but he does not want anything with me it’s been a year. I can’t wait anymore I tried to be friends and then tried to be in a relationship because that’s what I thought he wanted but he said it’s not. I’m not projecting I’m just trying to be happy we had conversations about this and what we were comfortable doing as friends. After our last break up he said that we should go our separate ways and after that we talked and he said we should not have sex because I get offended when he doesn’t talk to me. I ask that we can come to a understanding and things will change a.k.a my behavior and he said he didn’t think so. He said we will always be cool so I said okay. He knows how I feel but just doesn’t not feel the same today I decided to just take what he is saying and just stop this I sent him this: Good Morning I woke up thinking about you and I have to say that even tho you have told me in every way possible that you just don’t want a relationship with me I just can’t shake the feeling you give me. I know what I feel when we are together but I also know my behavior pushed you away so at this time I’m going to just wait it out and focus on other things hopefully you will come around if you find someone else then I guess it’s for the best at-least you will be happy but I like you too much as a person to just give up. I wont contact you all the time and will give you your space but just know that I think you are such a special person and I wish we had a better understanding of each other because I do like you and want you in my life I don’t have feelings like this often and I know it means something even if you don’t.... but now I feel stupid and think I’m forcing this

So this isn't a casual relationship transitioning to serious. You guys have already down graded.

Where you being honest and speaking from the heart? I think so. Follow though and walk away. At the very least it will allow you guys to reset your relationship. Maybe a fresh start later down the line and your both in a better place.Hell who knows what will happen?

Do the counceling and focus on yourself. Best of luck to you😊
click to expand



Yes It downgraded Monday after I sent another break up text
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Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by greylatern
Posted by dilettante

as a scorpio who just dated a virgo for 8ish months, you need to walk away.

trust @greylatern on this one.

Yes thank you. There is a lot of reasons in this case. Just to be clear, not Scorpio walk away which involves ā›½šŸ”„.

Take a long breather without expectations.
click to expand



But do you really think it worth it to reconnect down the line? I’m just in so much pain I don’t know if waiting for him is the right thing anymore
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Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by dilettante
Posted by Missscorpio30

I’m not going to force it but I know I can’t stop thinking about it if I plan to talk to him again! If I stop talking to him and move on I will talk to somebody else and forget him. I can’t just do what you are saying it’s either I’m all in or out no in between he wants to be friends still so I know we will talk sometimes

i really dont see that ending well for you

but good luck.
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Yes I know that’s why I’m trying to see if it’s worth it to think about reconnected
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I can suck the bullet out of a glock on safety.
@Whorpio
8 Years5,000+ PostsScorpio

Comments: 2583 Ā· Posts: 6184 Ā· Topics: 141
Posted by Missscorpio30

I’m not going to force it but I know I can’t stop thinking about it if I plan to talk to him again! If I stop talking to him and move on I will talk to somebody else and forget him. I can’t just do what you are saying it’s either I’m all in or out no in between he wants to be friends still so I know we will talk sometimes

Just be all out gurl. There’s nothing wrong with moving on, in fact I guarantee you’ll find someone better šŸ¤—
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LadyNeptune
@LadyNeptune
10 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 11076 Ā· Posts: 35718 Ā· Topics: 110
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by LadyNeptune

He has a daughter. So your need for his attention is always going to come second to her. Either you accept this and chill out, or you move onto someone ready to make you their sun.

His daughters are grown and no I don’t need that kind of attention just for him to check in regularly
click to expand



Your definition of 'regularly' is much different than his.

What does his kids being grown have to do with it? They will still ALWAYS come first, before you.
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Missscorpio30
@Missscorpio30
7 Years

Comments: 0 Ā· Posts: 129 Ā· Topics: 5
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by Missscorpio30
Posted by LadyNeptune

He has a daughter. So your need for his attention is always going to come second to her. Either you accept this and chill out, or you move onto someone ready to make you their sun.

His daughters are grown and no I don’t need that kind of attention just for him to check in regularly

Your definition of 'regularly' is much different than his.

What does his kids being grown have to do with it? They will still ALWAYS come first, before you.
click to expand




What part of thats not my issue don’t you get! Let it go
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