fearing rejection

I have made a few post about this virgo girl I like. 5 years of her liking me. I never allowed myself to feel much b/c of the globe trotting I was doing. Now I'm home and we have kinda started to take off. In the past I have been very inconsistent with her, disappointing/defeating her many times to the point where she just blocks me out for weeks, but she always comes around. This even happened right when I got home a month ago b/c I had been saying I want to see her and then had chances to and didn't. Now she has come around again and we are what seems to be the best we have been. Hanging out is great. We talk 24/7 and I have remained consistent for the first time in awhile. Really trying to prove/show her I care b/c I believe she is still a little skeptical and proceeding with caution.
To be honest about a week ago I was still unsure of things and where this was going, but this past week has been great. Hungout 3 times and even had sex, etc. Here is the question/problem. The first time we hung this past week she was kinda drunk and said "to be honest I'm super scared that you are gonna reject me." She also told me she talks to some other guys, but they mean nothing compared to me and they are a back up plan. She says "idk" about a lot of stuff, but says she is def wanting to see where we go, and wasn't ready to be tied down just yet. Which I am not saying I am either, Im just looking to see where this goes as well.
Our convos are getting deeper and she is def slowly opening up to me about things. Like I said it has only been about a week of this. I understand I have been all over the map/hurt her/etc. I also understand it is going to take some time to get us where I think we both wanna be. But do you virgirls really get this scared? Even last night she said I used to intimidate her but now its a whole dif type of scared. Last night I was with her and I have honestly never felt like someone has liked me this much. She kinda has these moments where she just seems smitten by me. I think this is what scares her. Almost seems like she is crazy about me, scares her to death and is just observing my every move to make sure my actions and motives are legit. The more consistent I am in proving that they are the more she opens up, but slowly. Just wondering ppls thoughts and if im on the right track and where to go from here. thanks

^^^^^^ lol... that I am. Done a lot of researching about all this and I think I know all the keywords to my dilemma lol.

I'm in a Cancer Virgo relationship for 3 years now. I love that you cancer men don't give up easily. My crab often complained how hard to get I was....But he hung in there !

To answer your question: Yes rejection from a guy we are growing to trust & invest time with is pretty scary. Your Virgil is scared you're going to leave for good one day.

When she's with you, she is absolutely crazy about you! You cancer men have a way to make us smitten over you. Just looking at you makes us nervous but aroused at the same time lol. You impress us. No other guy exists, just you! We think about you constantly. We won't tell you this though lol.

When you're inconsistent with her, she's analyzing everything. She most likely worries when you're absent for too long. She won't think of anything else but you...Her thoughts get consumed with you. And of course, we won't tell you this lol.

I think you're doing a great job with her. Be consistent like you are doing & that fear of rejection will fade away. She will open up like you've never seen before. She won't keep her hands off of you. 🙂

Ty for the response Repunzel.

So she fears I will leave her for good one day huh. I kinda take that she fears rejection in a different way, but maybe you are correct. I feel like I have disappointed/defeated her so many times that she is scared of that, aka rejection. Action to feeling. I'm sure it is a bit of both tho. She keeps saying she is not trying to have expectations. It almost feels like she is expecting me to disappoint her again (bc I have so many times) and watching me closely, analyzing, observing to make sure I am being consistent.

The way you describe everything about how she feels toward me is exactly how I feel that she feels, not to sound cocky. The thing is I can only see this side of her when we are together. When she text me things are a tad different, but still making progress day by day. It is rather hard to get her to reassure me that she is there, but I am doing it constantly to her. She is very meh about everything.

If she is so crazy about me then why does she talk to other guys? I like that she was open and honest with me about them, but still curious. She does say I am the only one she talks to like this 24/7 and has me over, sex, etc.

I have told her that I am trying to be more of myself lately. If I want her to hang out, I ask. If I have something on my mind, I say it. I don't know where to draw the line tho. It seems I have to constantly showing her attention, but cant come off clingy and overwhelm here. This is tough, but things are improving.