Crabstix
@Crabstix
11 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 9 · Topics: 1
In need of Virgo help :)
he's probably back having sex with the wife. he doesn't need you now.
Posted by KittenLaRouge
he's probably back having sex with the wife. he doesn't need you now.
That maybe true... They have not had sexual relations for over 2 years, party time for them.
the virgo i was talking to disappeared too. we are thousands of miles apart so it's an odd situation. i'm a virgo too so we kind of take turns disappearing on each other. i think this time though i will let him disappear permanently from my life. if that's what he wants then so be it. maybe it is wise to do the same in your situation.
Posted by Crabstix
Hello all,
I would like, if possible, some assistance on the behaviour of a virgo man I am, or thought I was, involved with, who has gone.. wait for it.. MIA. I have read through some posts of similar situations, but I figured why not get some input from you guys. So here it is...
We met via the net 3 months ago, and started chatting. He initiated the 1st conversation, and said he just wanted to spend time with me to get to know each other. I was ok with that, until he said he was married. I don't usually like to dabble in that area, as I would not want that done to me. He was honest with me and explained the situation, and why he felt the need to talk and spend time with me. I appreciate honesty so we continued our chats almost daily/nightly for 2-3 weeks. It progressed to picture exchanges, skype chats, and he said he wanted us to meet for 3 or 4 days, spend time together, dinner, walks, talks etc, and ofc plenty of time between the sheets, because that was what the meet would mainly be about. Now don't get me wrong, me being placed in a"Pretty Woman" scenario seems strange, but the fact of us both deciding that we both wanted that, and nothing more to put pressure on either of us, it didn't actually bother me. He said it could continue long after if both of us kept it all in perspective, which is fine with me. All this was discussed over a month ago, and since then we have continued daily chats, talking about when we would meet, how much we both were looking forward to it and general chat about other things. More and more each time we spoke, he would say he had missed me, hope your ok, did you sleep well, can't wait to see you etc. I told him that I missed him also, because I did. He has told me he likes me, sent pics while he is out with friends and while away on vacation, and we have generally kept up our daily chats.Until, you guessed it..POOF gone 😢 Our last conversation was almost 10 days ago. We chatted, both had missed each other, sent each other little pics of hugging etc, eventually saying goodnight and that was it.
Now I my be a crab, but I gave up being clingy years ago after some pretty awful relationships, and I could quite happily continue my life without a man. But with this guy, we clicked from the offset, were attracted to each other and had things in common, made each other laugh, and now I am like....well you can guess lol.
l:
Anyway, is "keep things in perspective" another way of saying "I am married, so don't have any expecations here"?
I am not sure what you are trying to figure out since you already identified what happened:
Posted by Crabstix
...He initiated the 1st conversation...he said he was married. I don't usually like to dabble in that area, as I would not want that done to me....
yet, you did....but moving on....
Posted by Crabstix
......the fact of us both deciding that we both wanted that, and nothing more to put pressure on either of us, it didn't actually bother me. ...we have generally kept up our daily chats.Until, you guessed it..POOF gone 😢click to expand
it was not meant to be more than it was. He got his fill and moved on. You didn't want anything more right?
Posted by CrabstixPosted by KittenLaRouge
he's probably back having sex with the wife. he doesn't need you now.
That maybe true... They have not had sexual relations for over 2 years, party time for them.click to expand
According to him. If a person is willing to cheat on someone that they vowed to honour, respect, blah, blah, blah, I think it's safe to say that he or she is not an honest person and you can't take their word on anything.
Got his fill? We have not actually met for him to get his fill. Unless you call regular chats and keeping in touch getting his fill. And no, I did/do not want more than offered.. but going from an "I miss you" chat to nothing over night, is rather odd to me. Thanks for ur input tho 🙂
Posted by Crabstix
Got his fill? We have not actually met for him to get his fill. Unless you call regular chats and keeping in touch getting his fill. And no, I did/do not want more than offered.. but going from an "I miss you" chat to nothing over night, is rather odd to me. Thanks for ur input tho 🙂
I take it you thought I meant sex? Yes, got his fill. Translation: ego stroked, attention he lacks, what have you.
Lol. And you're welcome 😛
Posted by Crabstix
Got his fill? We have not actually met for him to get his fill. Unless you call regular chats and keeping in touch getting his fill. And no, I did/do not want more than offered.. but going from an "I miss you" chat to nothing over night, is rather odd to me. Thanks for ur input tho 🙂
If you didn't want anything more than what was offered, why would it matter if he went from one extreme to another?
You did not/do not want more (but you do want an explanation), so it really should not matter if he floats in and out of your life.
He is married and sought you out, so his integrity is already shot.
He set up a situation where you agreed to not have/want any expections. Check.
And you wonder why he isn't showing you the basic level of decency and consitency?
Okay.
It mattered because I did not get what was offered lol... He was hell bent on us meeting up, he did all the talking about the plans, and I figured we were both happy with it going through. I was looking forward to it lol. Oh well, we live and learn I guess.
And he had already told me he almost cheated a few years ago but could not go thru with it because of the guilt, and hoped the situ with his wife would change, but it hadn't, and now he did not feel the guilt about going thru with it.
Thanks again!
And he had already told me he almost cheated a few years ago but could not go thru with it because of the guilt, and hoped the situ with his wife would change, but it hadn't, and now he did not feel the guilt about going thru with it.
Thanks again!
Posted by Crabstix
until he said he was married.
...
Posted by Crabstix
I appreciate honesty
😆
Posted by Crabstix
so we continued our chats almost daily/nightly for 2-3 weeks. It progressed to picture exchanges, skype chats, and he said he wanted us to meet for 3 or 4 days, spend time together, dinner, walks, talks etc, and ofc plenty of time between the sheets, because that was what the meet would mainly be about.
Clearly you wouldn't dabble in that.
Posted by Crabstix
it didn't actually bother me.click to expand
Obviously, since you have no honor/integrity.
It's pretty sad, you're not even good enough for him to be a side affair. 😢
Oh well, time to go find yourself another married man to click with.
I don't usually like to dabble in that area, as I would not want that done to me. He was honest with me and explained the situation, and why he felt the need to talk and spend time with me. I appreciate honesty so we continued our chats almost daily/nightly for 2-3 weeks.
Karma.......... if you don't want it done to you and you kept doing it anyway is Karma
Any man cheating on his spouse or girlfriend is not honest just because they tell you they are doing it. Makes them look even more scummy since they come up with "why" and expect the victim to have empathy and compassion for them.
"Now don't get me wrong, me being placed in a"Pretty Woman" scenario seems strange, but the fact of us both deciding that we both wanted that, and nothing more to put pressure on either of us, it didn't actually bother me. He said it could continue long after if both of us kept it all in perspective, which is fine with me"
You call this being placed in a Pretty woman scenario when you got nothing from this but words and fake promises. This man was needing some ego boosting. He found you...a willing participant and layed it on you. The fact you were fine with all of this was a turn off for him.
"But with this guy, we clicked from the offset, were attracted to each other and had things in common, made each other laugh, and now I am like....well you can guess lol."
This does not make a relationship. You are lonely. Seems like men have dumped you for whatever reason and you cling on to anything that remotely gives attention. Thank goodness he stopped speaking to you. Just let this go and work on your making yourself emotionally healthy.
Married men, separated men are douchebags. Run from them. I don't care the reason. If he is super sweet in the beginning run.....If he misses you and you have not met. Run. If he loves you and does nothing behind the words..Run.
There are millions and millions of douches....don't hold onto one.
Karma.......... if you don't want it done to you and you kept doing it anyway is Karma
Any man cheating on his spouse or girlfriend is not honest just because they tell you they are doing it. Makes them look even more scummy since they come up with "why" and expect the victim to have empathy and compassion for them.
"Now don't get me wrong, me being placed in a"Pretty Woman" scenario seems strange, but the fact of us both deciding that we both wanted that, and nothing more to put pressure on either of us, it didn't actually bother me. He said it could continue long after if both of us kept it all in perspective, which is fine with me"
You call this being placed in a Pretty woman scenario when you got nothing from this but words and fake promises. This man was needing some ego boosting. He found you...a willing participant and layed it on you. The fact you were fine with all of this was a turn off for him.
"But with this guy, we clicked from the offset, were attracted to each other and had things in common, made each other laugh, and now I am like....well you can guess lol."
This does not make a relationship. You are lonely. Seems like men have dumped you for whatever reason and you cling on to anything that remotely gives attention. Thank goodness he stopped speaking to you. Just let this go and work on your making yourself emotionally healthy.
Married men, separated men are douchebags. Run from them. I don't care the reason. If he is super sweet in the beginning run.....If he misses you and you have not met. Run. If he loves you and does nothing behind the words..Run.
There are millions and millions of douches....don't hold onto one.
@Damnata... you do not know me, and I have never got mixed up with a married man before, with or without problems, as it is not my style . And I did not seek out a married man, he sought me for whatever his reasons. I am not the first and I doubt the last person on this earth to get in a muddle with someone in a relationship, so do not sit there and judge me.
Then end of my message did not fit in, I asked for advice, not personal digs at wether I am good enough for a fling lol, or that I seek married men, which I do not.
Wonderful response thank you!
Then end of my message did not fit in, I asked for advice, not personal digs at wether I am good enough for a fling lol, or that I seek married men, which I do not.
Wonderful response thank you!
Posted by SpinCycle
I don't usually like to dabble in that area, as I would not want that done to me. He was honest with me and explained the situation, and why he felt the need to talk and spend time with me. I appreciate honesty so we continued our chats almost daily/nightly for 2-3 weeks.
Karma.......... if you don't want it done to you and you kept doing it anyway is Karma
Any man cheating on his spouse or girlfriend is not honest just because they tell you they are doing it. Makes them look even more scummy since they come up with "why" and expect the victim to have empathy and compassion for them.
"Now don't get me wrong, me being placed in a"Pretty Woman" scenario seems strange, but the fact of us both deciding that we both wanted that, and nothing more to put pressure on either of us, it didn't actually bother me. He said it could continue long after if both of us kept it all in perspective, which is fine with me"
You call this being placed in a Pretty woman scenario when you got nothing from this but words and fake promises. This man was needing some ego boosting. He found you...a willing participant and layed it on you. The fact you were fine with all of this was a turn off for him.
"But with this guy, we clicked from the offset, were attracted to each other and had things in common, made each other laugh, and now I am like....well you can guess lol."
This does not make a relationship. You are lonely. Seems like men have dumped you for whatever reason and you cling on to anything that remotely gives attention. Thank goodness he stopped speaking to you. Just let this go and work on your making yourself emotionally healthy.
Married men, separated men are douchebags. Run from them. I don't care the reason. If he is super sweet in the beginning run.....If he misses you and you have not met. Run. If he loves you and does nothing behind the words..Run.
There are millions and millions of douches....don't hold onto one.
Thanks for this 🙂 I am not lonely lol, am quite happy alone, and I have certainly not clung to any man I have gone out with over the years. When I was younger yes, but not now. I have dumped men, and been dumped.. makes no odds down the line. Cheers again. No more douchbags!
Posted by DamnataPosted by Crabstix
until he said he was married.
...
Posted by Crabstix
I appreciate honesty
😆
Posted by Crabstix
so we continued our chats almost daily/nightly for 2-3 weeks. It progressed to picture exchanges, skype chats, and he said he wanted us to meet for 3 or 4 days, spend time together, dinner, walks, talks etc, and ofc plenty of time between the sheets, because that was what the meet would mainly be about.
Clearly you wouldn't dabble in that.
Posted by Crabstix
it didn't actually bother me.
Obviously, since you have no honor/integrity.
It's pretty sad, you're not even good enough for him to be a side affair. 😢
Oh well, time to go find yourself another married man to click with.click to expand
Hey you Romanian goddess, to be fair I think you spend way too much time on DXP, theres so many better things to do with your time than wasting it judging other people over the internet. Give it a try 🙂
Posted by Crabstix
And I did not seek out a married man, he sought me for whatever his reasons.
So you'll just go along with whatever man who hits on you? wow
Posted by Crabstix
Wonderful response thank you!click to expand
Ikr.
Posted by BoomShakalakaBoomPosted by DamnataPosted by Crabstix
until he said he was married.
...
Posted by Crabstix
I appreciate honesty
😆
Posted by Crabstix
so we continued our chats almost daily/nightly for 2-3 weeks. It progressed to picture exchanges, skype chats, and he said he wanted us to meet for 3 or 4 days, spend time together, dinner, walks, talks etc, and ofc plenty of time between the sheets, because that was what the meet would mainly be about.
Clearly you wouldn't dabble in that.
Posted by Crabstix
it didn't actually bother me.
Obviously, since you have no honor/integrity.
It's pretty sad, you're not even good enough for him to be a side affair. 😢
Oh well, time to go find yourself another married man to click with.
Hey you Romanian goddess, to be fair I think you spend way too much time on DXP, theres so many better things to do with your time than wasting it judging other people over the internet. Give it a try 🙂click to expand
I will spend my time without further assistance from you Shaka 🙂
But thank you 🙂
when people give you honest advice and you get defensive and say they judging/digging on you is upsurd. This is the case of telling you what you did not want to hear which was the TRUTH.
idk if you wanted to seek praise and keep up the fairytale but either way you learned your lesson a man will sell you a dream stop falling for it.
idk if you wanted to seek praise and keep up the fairytale but either way you learned your lesson a man will sell you a dream stop falling for it.
Posted by DamnataPosted by Crabstix
And I did not seek out a married man, he sought me for whatever his reasons.
So you'll just go along with whatever man who hits on you? wow
Posted by Crabstix
Wonderful response thank you!
Ikr.click to expand
As I said you do not know me, clearly you think you do... which IS sad.
Cheerio.
Posted by DamnataPosted by BoomShakalakaBoomPosted by DamnataPosted by Crabstix
until he said he was married.
...
Posted by Crabstix
I appreciate honesty
😆
Posted by Crabstix
so we continued our chats almost daily/nightly for 2-3 weeks. It progressed to picture exchanges, skype chats, and he said he wanted us to meet for 3 or 4 days, spend time together, dinner, walks, talks etc, and ofc plenty of time between the sheets, because that was what the meet would mainly be about.
Clearly you wouldn't dabble in that.
Posted by Crabstix
it didn't actually bother me.
Obviously, since you have no honor/integrity.
It's pretty sad, you're not even good enough for him to be a side affair. 😢
Oh well, time to go find yourself another married man to click with.
Hey you Romanian goddess, to be fair I think you spend way too much time on DXP, theres so many better things to do with your time than wasting it judging other people over the internet. Give it a try 🙂
I will spend my time without further assistance from you Shaka 🙂
But thank you 🙂click to expand
Dont get mad now 🙂 I know you feel that giving "advice" on here is a good outlet for your Virgoan need to "heal" and "help", Im just trying to remind you of the thin line between giving advice and judging people to feel better about yourself. To be fair I think youre doing the latter on this thread.
Dont waste your life on this site, take that piece of advice as an e-friend 😉
He is married, at the point you found out, you should have said adios loser.
Hate to tell you this but you are going to be judged, because you didn't even care or consider the ramifications of your actions in continuing this nonsense. I get it, you are A-Okay to be a side piece, your moral compass was being tossed aside, etc... but that doesn't make it right.
Obviously either his wife found out or his guilt over what he was contemplating smacked some sense into him. You need to move on, find a unmarried/uninvolved man and leave this loser alone.
Hate to tell you this but you are going to be judged, because you didn't even care or consider the ramifications of your actions in continuing this nonsense. I get it, you are A-Okay to be a side piece, your moral compass was being tossed aside, etc... but that doesn't make it right.
Obviously either his wife found out or his guilt over what he was contemplating smacked some sense into him. You need to move on, find a unmarried/uninvolved man and leave this loser alone.
I cannot relate to mostly anything in your post Shaka, other than the fact I do waste a lot of time here.
The rest is so far off the mark, even by Virgo condescending standards lol 😄
But since I caught a lil of you on this topic..what have you been up to? Where have you recently travelled?
The rest is so far off the mark, even by Virgo condescending standards lol 😄
But since I caught a lil of you on this topic..what have you been up to? Where have you recently travelled?
What a disappointment! I thought OP is indeed in need of a Virgo help. The only help OP would need is a slap of cold water in her face. Wake up, OP! This is not a scene from "Pretty Woman".
Do come back when you have a REAL problem. We're here 24/7. 😄
Do come back when you have a REAL problem. We're here 24/7. 😄
Thanks for this I am not lonely lol, am quite happy alone, and I have certainly not clung to any man I have gone out with over the years. When I was younger yes, but not now. I have dumped men, and been dumped.. makes no odds down the line. Cheers again. No more douchbags!
Sweetie the fact you are on here looking for clarification for something that actually needs no clarification means you are emotionally unhealthy. This man told you he was married. You stayed because? ......you were lonely, needed attention or whatever and he fulfilled this for you. If you were not lonely a Go kick rocks would have been your response and you would have not forged ahead.
You are the epitome of a strong woman. You hold all the cards a man needs and craves. You set your own worth. Make men work for you! These responses are because you are looking for justification for a silly predicament. If this douche comes back then ignore him...Completely..don't go try to close doors and give excuses..just don't talk to him. Let him and his wife do their thing and you find a single man who is worthy of your standards work for you.
Sweetie the fact you are on here looking for clarification for something that actually needs no clarification means you are emotionally unhealthy. This man told you he was married. You stayed because? ......you were lonely, needed attention or whatever and he fulfilled this for you. If you were not lonely a Go kick rocks would have been your response and you would have not forged ahead.
You are the epitome of a strong woman. You hold all the cards a man needs and craves. You set your own worth. Make men work for you! These responses are because you are looking for justification for a silly predicament. If this douche comes back then ignore him...Completely..don't go try to close doors and give excuses..just don't talk to him. Let him and his wife do their thing and you find a single man who is worthy of your standards work for you.
Posted by Crabstix
@Damnata... you do not know me, and I have never got mixed up with a married man before, with or without problems, as it is not my style . And I did not seek out a married man, he sought me for whatever his reasons. I am not the first and I doubt the last person on this earth to get in a muddle with someone in a relationship, so do not sit there and judge me.
Then end of my message did not fit in, I asked for advice, not personal digs at wether I am good enough for a fling lol, or that I seek married men, which I do not.
Wonderful response thank you!
Wow...had I responded it would have paralleled with what Damnata said..with some more punch to it. She covered my thoughts exactly. What I don't understand from your above response to her is...were you looking for endorsements and pats on the back for your fucked up behavior? Fucked up behavior meaning...fucking around with some woman's husband. (just to be clear) So what were you looking for here praise? Bend over...I have a 7.5 pointed boot on. That's all you'll get from me. STAY AWAY FROM OTHER WOMEN'S HUSBANDS/MEN! smfh
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I would like, if possible, some assistance on the behaviour of a virgo man I am, or thought I was, involved with, who has gone.. wait for it.. MIA. I have read through some posts of similar situations, but I figured why not get some input from you guys. So here it is...
We met via the net 3 months ago, and started chatting. He initiated the 1st conversation, and said he just wanted to spend time with me to get to know each other. I was ok with that, until he said he was married. I don't usually like to dabble in that area, as I would not want that done to me. He was honest with me and explained the situation, and why he felt the need to talk and spend time with me. I appreciate honesty so we continued our chats almost daily/nightly for 2-3 weeks. It progressed to picture exchanges, skype chats, and he said he wanted us to meet for 3 or 4 days, spend time together, dinner, walks, talks etc, and ofc plenty of time between the sheets, because that was what the meet would mainly be about. Now don't get me wrong, me being placed in a"Pretty Woman" scenario seems strange, but the fact of us both deciding that we both wanted that, and nothing more to put pressure on either of us, it didn't actually bother me. He said it could continue long after if both of us kept it all in perspective, which is fine with me. All this was discussed over a month ago, and since then we have continued daily chats, talking about when we would meet, how much we both were looking forward to it and general chat about other things. More and more each time we spoke, he would say he had missed me, hope your ok, did you sleep well, can't wait to see you etc. I told him that I missed him also, because I did. He has told me he likes me, sent pics while he is out with friends and while away on vacation, and we have generally kept up our daily chats.Until, you guessed it..POOF gone 😢 Our last conversation was almost 10 days ago. We chatted, both had missed each other, sent each other little pics of hugging etc, eventually saying goodnight and that was it.
Now I my be a crab, but I gave up being clingy years ago after some pretty awful relationships, and I could quite happily continue my life without a man. But with this guy, we clicked from the offset, were attracted to each other and had things in common, made each other laugh, and now I am like....well you can guess lol.