Virgleeb loves the pool. Cool beans. I'm not a pool/beach type girl because it's boring to me. I'd rather go hike or something like that. He whines and begs for me to go to the pool with him, and I have from most of the time but I really don't have a lot of fun. All he does is float around and drink beer. I tell him I'm not a pool or beach person, but he does well to try and guilt trip me into going regardless of what I say. I say to him "I don't have to go with you, go have fun and enjoy the pool" but then he mopes around and doesn't really talk to me until he finally goes.
Like tonight, I got off work at 1015pm, im hungry and wanna relax. He asks as soon as I'm out of the car if I will go to the pool with him. I told him I really don't want to go tonight. He continues to press me for 10 minutes. Finally, he asks "well I could go by myself but what if I drown?". Really?? I shot that request down and then he got super moody, barely talked me to me yada yada. I reminded him that he is going to have to be OK with me not always going with him to the pool because it's not my thing. He just got dressed and said he just doesn't want to be alone at the pool but if he's not back in a few hours then he's probably dead from drowning. Really? :/
Thing is, we do *everything* together save for a couple of things. Daily. I don't see how he can be butt hurt about me not going once or twice to the pool, and I don't find it fair to try and make me feel bad about it. He actually had already been to the pool himself today, twice, without me because I've been at work. Now, I feel stressed because he has an attitude about me not wanting to do something I don't want to do.
Actually, in one of my other posts I did say I was making him food and giving him massages. I never said I didn't and that I wasn't there trying to do what I can but he seems to be unresponsive about any of it. I made gorgonzola and garlic ravioli and gave him the entire amount. He barely eats anything tho which worries me. My first post was explaining the situation so someone might be able to relate to what has been going on.
Damnata nailed it I believe, after weeks of this I'm just worried and yes, lonely since his ex doesn't allow me to be at his side in the hospital. She's never met me but I don't push at going, I just feel like I can't do anything and when I am able to it seems like nothing makes him feel better. I don't want to cause a scene about how I feel at all. It's just hard because he is so distant when he's home it's like dealing with a statue. I gave him food once to have while at the hospital so he could eat something but all that did was cause problems for him when his ex saw it and asked who/where he got it. She said it was tainted :/
And Feby, the little boy was able to leave the hospital for a couple days but had to be re-admitted to the ICU. They don't know whats wrong yet but it's bad. He cant breath.
Thanks everyone for your insights, I realize my feelings are selfish ones. My outburst is what made me realize I need to ask for help.
I want to help him. He wasnt depressed before so I've been trying my best to do what I can given the circumstances. He seems very unresponsive and distant despite his kid being 100% . He isn't like other men I've dated so I'm not sure what the best action is at the moment. If I leave him alone, he gets pretty upset about it. Yet if I try to be there, make him food or massage him he just appears blank or barely eats it.
Hey guys, I'm an aquarius with leo moon and Aries mars/Venus. Virgleeb is a Virgo with leo moon and every other placement in Libra.
We have been dating about 6 months, I asked him out and we literally became inseparable. I live with him and issues between us have cropped up in the last few weeks.
Virgleeb has baggage tho, like 5 jetliners full of baggage. Basically, he is separated from his wife of 17 years. She cheated on him and now lives with her new boyfriend. A couple months after that he finds out she has a kid and they do a test to prove it isn't virgleebs. Well, it is. A couple months after that, I enter the picture. I knew of his baggage and still wanted it. He has stated he wants nothing to do with her ever but has to because of his son. The baby boy was born January 5th but almost died. Two months later he was rushed to the ICU unable to breath. His kid spent 10 days in the hospital, in which I wasn't allowed to be there on request of his ex. She Has never met me but has stalked my Fb daily. Anyways, after the ordeal we went camping with friends and family. His family treated me awkwardly, they admitted it, because I wasn't the ex and they felt weird. Drunkenly, I made the mistake of voicing my frustration on our relationship woes (not getting much affection) and ouch yeah.. My bad. He waited a while to say something but since has told me how badly it hurt and embarrassed him. He said he loves me, he wants me here with him but feels that my frustration is because of him being in "the most depressive time of his life". His ex isn't nice, she's an awful person and he has to deal with her not working with him, disallowing seeing his son, the medical bills, trying to divorce her and take her off company insurance, the poor guy IS a wreck. He isn't sure he can be there for anyone. I understand it's a trying time but it's very hard for me feeling unable to be there to see his son or go to the hospital and support my guy and while not getting any affection. Any ideas on what to do?
One scorp I was dating wanted me to see him play baseball. I had just returned home from his place and a long day of work and he texted me asking if I wanted to come to the ballpark and watch him play. I said (as I told him earlier before he asked me/I knew about the game) that I was seriously tired and going to bed but I hope he has fun. After the game he texted again, which I guess woke me up, asking if he could come by and see me. I actually don't even remember replying to him but apparently I did saying that his text woke me up, glad he had fun but that I was going back to sleep and I'll see him tomorrow. The next day he was kinda pissy to me and the first words out of his mouth was "I guess you didn't really want to see me at all." He never let that go. He took it as I wasn't serious about him and he started reflecting that. I later found out that it was his LAST game of the season and a CHAMPIONSHIP game. I still feel like a ginormous dick.
Thanks guys! My head is much better altho I want to scratch the hell outta the scabs!
Virgleeb every so often says says stuff like "do you love me" or "you like to do that for me because you love me", I don't say it, I don't really say I care and I corrected him a couple times or avoided answering like the plague. Tonight he let slip a "because I love you" and it sorta freaked me out. I feel like he is pushing for me to say it. Way too soon for me :/
Plus he keeps mentioning he wants to meet my folks and how I didn't friend him on fb like he asked me to.
He seems ok for now letting things go at my pace but it's not without reminder that he wants more integration.
After some shopping, Virgleeb starting debating about something really stupid but apparently very important. Whether or not flip-flops are considered shoes. I never gave a real answer, just said *some* people do not consider them actual shoes as they do not protect/encase the feet but more as a general footwear. He was so passionate about this (lulz), as we pulled the bags out the back of the truck he grabbed the top of the gate and slammed it shut but my ass still in the way! It came down right on the corner of my skull and I pretty much fell to the ground. It took me a few seconds (probably longer) to function after the pain but was kinda stumbling around,bleeding and nauseated.
Virgleeb was freaking the treetrunk out! He ran me up to his apartment, into his bathroom, and wanted to see if he could see skull or if the gash was gonna need stitches. Luckily, it wasn't all that bad despite the blood. Virgleeb could NOT stop apologizing over and over, that it was OK to hurt him back, that he hoped I didn't hate him, and he could not stand that he hurt me. We were in the bathroom for about an hour, most of it was him just STARING at me with huge puppy dog eyes, freaking out and apologizing to me. I told him it was JUST an accident, I didn't hate him, that it was OK, I was OK, that I didn't feel the need to hurt him back and that he didn't need to worry or apologize so much. He wrapped my head up and we doubled checked to make sure I was concussion-free. Even afterwards, he kept apologizing to me all through-out the night. Now, I'm not really allowed near the trunk at all and he has vowed to pay better attention.
Head strong, yep. Jealous, can be. Usually for good reason. Possessive, yes. I tend to say the person is "mine" or "my (insert guys name)". I'm even possessive of which seat is mine in a car. I'll intensely stare someone down and tell them "You're in my seat.". Kinda like Sheldon on Big Bang Theory. But we're not HUGELY possessive like how some people are saying things like "You're mine and mine alone and you can't ever hang out with anyone else because I'm everything you need blah blah crazy crazy".