How do I win back my cappy man?

Hey everyone,

hope you guys can help me.

So I met this cappy on a dating app back in May. We immediately clicked and I went to visit him two weeks later. I stayed for the weekend and things were going well apart from a misunderstanding. He did say he wanted to meet me again and see me more often. He also had plans to leave the country though. We met again two weeks later. He seemed distant and I felt like he rather wanted to spend time with his friends than try to connect with me. I also voiced my concerns and he basically snapped. I do have to say he had plans to leave the country two weeks later and tried to see as many friends as possible plus he had to move flats and was quite stressed about work as well. He went more cold and distant after our second weekend together. Plans to leave the country were cancelled, he‘s staying. I felt like he didn’t really want stay in touch at times, other times I thought he only wanted to stay friends. When I did talk to him about it, he got upset, only to come back after I messaged him again. He also accused me of having feelings for a guy-friend of mine, which I don’t. His ex-gf cheated on him for years, I guess that’s why he‘s so guarded.

Two weeks ago, I was about to visit him when he got jealous again, for absolutely no reason. He later confessed that he was in love with me but has been trying to fight it ever since my second visit. He said he wasn’t sure I felt the same and thought there were other guys involved and that he‘s sorry and will try to be less distant and cold from now on. He also said he wanted to be with me. I got invited to his annual trip to a race circuit. He was really sweet the first evening, we ended up sleeping together for the first time that night. The next day he said he wasn’t much for PDA in front of his friends. Also he gave me the cold shoulder all evening. I told him to not only talk to his female friend and roommate, but also to me. I also made a comment about him seemingly wanting to be with her rather than me. He got terribly upset about it. We were both tipsy that night, I have to add. I tried to talk to him a few times that night and the next day. He told me things were fine, but was short and really cold. I couldn’t enjoy the day anymore with him being distant, but I think he wanted me to act as if nothing ever happened. He tends to gloss over things. When I got home, he told me I ruined half of his weekend and that he needed time to think. I did tell him that I didn’t like a few things he did either. And gave him a lengthy explanation why I said the things about him preferring his female friend over me. He told me he was still thinking about things.

Two days later, I tried to talk to him again. He never replied, I got upset by that point and then he snapped as well. Told me to leave him alone, that I was getting on his nerves etc and then when I asked if I would ever hear from him again, he blocked me on his phone and WhatsApp.

I messaged him on the app we met. I apologized profusely and explained. He did read those messages. He knows that I have a past that makes me act the way I do. At first he only got on the app to read my messages. Today, he logged in a few times. I fear that he might be looking for someone new. He never replied to my messages, sadly. How can I win him back and get him to give me another chance?

He‘s Cap Sun, Scorpio Moon, Aqua Venus, Sag Mars, Libra Rising

I‘m Aries Sun, Libra Moon, Taurus Venus, Leo Mars and Virgo Rising

Would greatly appreciate any help!

He blocked you. Stop reaching out to him on apps that you’re not blocked on. If he wants to contact you he will, if not... well fuck it.

Also you’re really not compatible.

more toxic than Chernobyl....

I think he only blocked me because he was really upset that evening. Sometimes all it takes is a stupid misunderstanding for him to snap. He usually does calm down pretty fast though. That’s why I want to try and talk to him.

@Endless Can you please elaborate? What exactly is toxic?

Posted by Kittens

Offer him an Anal sex

Lol. Will that help with the stubbornness?

Seriously though, anything else I can do? I really like him.

Damn... That scorpio moon is just a real treat isn't it? 😵



Blocking you means he's done with you .. Stop running after this guy.

Posted by Basorexia

Damn... That scorpio moon is just a real treat isn't it? 😵



Blocking you means he's done with you .. Stop running after this guy.

Even if he’s done so in the heat of the moment, after me trying to pressure him to talk to me when he wasn‘t ready? Is there really no chance of him calming down and realizing he overreacted?

I also wonder how you can tell someone you‘ve fallen for them and then a few days later you just cut them off as if they never meant anything to you?! 😢

Posted by LinAries

Posted by Basorexia

Damn... That scorpio moon is just a real treat isn't it? 😵



Blocking you means he's done with you .. Stop running after this guy.

Even if he’s done so in the heat of the moment, after me trying to pressure him to talk to me when he wasn‘t ready? Is there really no chance of him calming down and realizing he overreacted?

I also wonder how you can tell someone you‘ve fallen for them and then a few days later you just cut them off as if they never meant anything to you?! 😢

click to expand

I don't know about you, but when I go out of my way to block someone - it means I'm done, no contact wanted with the blocked person.

I know it's hard for Aries to accept no desired contact (usually the men have a hard time with this.. ) but you need to drop it.

I'm not saying he's right... I'm simply saying you need to respect his wishes.

If he wants you he *knows where to find you...*

You have to be a little more loving to yourself and not give this much attention and power to this guy... Or guys in general.

You shouldn't have to convince someone to be with you... I say this often but it's true. Be kind to yourself.

Posted by Basorexia

Posted by LinAries

Posted by Basorexia

Damn... That scorpio moon is just a real treat isn't it? 😵



Blocking you means he's done with you .. Stop running after this guy.

Even if he’s done so in the heat of the moment, after me trying to pressure him to talk to me when he wasn‘t ready? Is there really no chance of him calming down and realizing he overreacted?

I also wonder how you can tell someone you‘ve fallen for them and then a few days later you just cut them off as if they never meant anything to you?! 😢

I don't know about you, but when I go out of my way to block someone - it means I'm done, no contact wanted with the blocked person.

I know it's hard for Aries to accept no desired contact (usually the men have a hard time with this.. ) but you need to drop it.

I'm not saying he's right... I'm simply saying you need to respect his wishes.

If he wants you he *knows where to find you...*

You have to be a little more loving to yourself and not give this much attention and power to this guy... Or guys in general.

You shouldn't have to convince someone to be with you... I say this often but it's true. Be kind to yourself.

click to expand

I don’t block people. I always try to communicate and solve the issue. I think he blocked me at a time when he was really upset. And overreacting. And I‘ve seen him become upset and then go back to normal after a few days. So I thought there’s something I can do. Especially since he left that one line open...

I think my Taurus venus is having a hard time letting go of people in general. Also I‘m having a hard time accepting that he said he’s fallen in love with me one day and then blocking me the next.

Posted by LinAries

Posted by Basorexia

Posted by LinAries

Posted by Basorexia

Damn... That scorpio moon is just a real treat isn't it? 😵



Blocking you means he's done with you .. Stop running after this guy.

Even if he’s done so in the heat of the moment, after me trying to pressure him to talk to me when he wasn‘t ready? Is there really no chance of him calming down and realizing he overreacted?

I also wonder how you can tell someone you‘ve fallen for them and then a few days later you just cut them off as if they never meant anything to you?! 😢

I don't know about you, but when I go out of my way to block someone - it means I'm done, no contact wanted with the blocked person.

I know it's hard for Aries to accept no desired contact (usually the men have a hard time with this.. ) but you need to drop it.

I'm not saying he's right... I'm simply saying you need to respect his wishes.

If he wants you he *knows where to find you...*

You have to be a little more loving to yourself and not give this much attention and power to this guy... Or guys in general.

You shouldn't have to convince someone to be with you... I say this often but it's true. Be kind to yourself.

I don’t block people. I always try to communicate and solve the issue. I think he blocked me at a time when he was really upset. And overreacting. And I‘ve seen him become upset and then go back to normal after a few days. So I thought there’s something I can do. Especially since he left that one line open...

I think my Taurus venus is having a hard time letting go of people in general. Also I‘m having a hard time accepting that he said he’s fallen in love with me one day and then blocking me the next.

click to expand

It's absolutely okay to block people especially when you've reached that point of no return, some people don't get it. It gets ugly.

It's okay if you don't, communication is key.. but that's when you actually still have a relationship going. When the other party still wants to try.

I'm not judging you, I can only speak from my perspective and personal experience.. I think that's all we can do on dxpnet... Really.

He's blocked you, he's ignored your messages... Taurus venus or not...You're better off letting him be.

It can get uglier.

Posted by Basorexia

Posted by LinAries

Posted by Basorexia

Posted by LinAries

Posted by Basorexia

Damn... That scorpio moon is just a real treat isn't it? 😵



Blocking you means he's done with you .. Stop running after this guy.

Even if he’s done so in the heat of the moment, after me trying to pressure him to talk to me when he wasn‘t ready? Is there really no chance of him calming down and realizing he overreacted?

I also wonder how you can tell someone you‘ve fallen for them and then a few days later you just cut them off as if they never meant anything to you?! 😢

I don't know about you, but when I go out of my way to block someone - it means I'm done, no contact wanted with the blocked person.

I know it's hard for Aries to accept no desired contact (usually the men have a hard time with this.. ) but you need to drop it.

I'm not saying he's right... I'm simply saying you need to respect his wishes.

If he wants you he *knows where to find you...*

You have to be a little more loving to yourself and not give this much attention and power to this guy... Or guys in general.

You shouldn't have to convince someone to be with you... I say this often but it's true. Be kind to yourself.

I don’t block people. I always try to communicate and solve the issue. I think he blocked me at a time when he was really upset. And overreacting. And I‘ve seen him become upset and then go back to normal after a few days. So I thought there’s something I can do. Especially since he left that one line open...

I think my Taurus venus is having a hard time letting go of people in general. Also I‘m having a hard time accepting that he said he’s fallen in love with me one day and then blocking me the next.

It's absolutely okay to block people especially when you've reached that point of no return, some people don't get it. It gets ugly.

It's okay if you don't, communication is key.. but that's when you actually still have a relationship going. When the other party still wants to try.

I'm not judging you, I can only speak from my perspective and personal experience.. I think that's all we can do on dxpnet... Really.

He's blocked you, he's ignored your messages... Taurus venus or not...You're better off letting him be.

It can get uglier.

click to expand

It’s not that I annoyed him over and over again. He wanted his time to think. I wanted to talk about it then and there. He got upset. I wouldn’t try to solve the issue if I didn’t think there’s was a chance he will calm down and realize that all I wanted was to communicate. But maybe he won’t.

And if he doesn’t want to talk to me, I can’t force him. I know that much. It’s just hard to accept. 😢 Because when I care about someone or have fallen for them, I could never ignore them or cut them off.

Posted by LinAries

Posted by Basorexia

Posted by LinAries

Posted by Basorexia

Posted by LinAries

Posted by Basorexia

Damn... That scorpio moon is just a real treat isn't it? 😵



Blocking you means he's done with you .. Stop running after this guy.

Even if he’s done so in the heat of the moment, after me trying to pressure him to talk to me when he wasn‘t ready? Is there really no chance of him calming down and realizing he overreacted?

I also wonder how you can tell someone you‘ve fallen for them and then a few days later you just cut them off as if they never meant anything to you?! 😢

I don't know about you, but when I go out of my way to block someone - it means I'm done, no contact wanted with the blocked person.

I know it's hard for Aries to accept no desired contact (usually the men have a hard time with this.. ) but you need to drop it.

I'm not saying he's right... I'm simply saying you need to respect his wishes.

If he wants you he *knows where to find you...*

You have to be a little more loving to yourself and not give this much attention and power to this guy... Or guys in general.

You shouldn't have to convince someone to be with you... I say this often but it's true. Be kind to yourself.

I don’t block people. I always try to communicate and solve the issue. I think he blocked me at a time when he was really upset. And overreacting. And I‘ve seen him become upset and then go back to normal after a few days. So I thought there’s something I can do. Especially since he left that one line open...

I think my Taurus venus is having a hard time letting go of people in general. Also I‘m having a hard time accepting that he said he’s fallen in love with me one day and then blocking me the next.

It's absolutely okay to block people especially when you've reached that point of no return, some people don't get it. It gets ugly.

It's okay if you don't, communication is key.. but that's when you actually still have a relationship going. When the other party still wants to try.

I'm not judging you, I can only speak from my perspective and personal experience.. I think that's all we can do on dxpnet... Really.

He's blocked you, he's ignored your messages... Taurus venus or not...You're better off letting him be.

It can get uglier.

It’s not that I annoyed him over and over again. He wanted his time to think. I wanted to talk about it then and there. He got upset. I wouldn’t try to solve the issue if I didn’t think there’s was a chance he will calm down and realize that all I wanted was to communicate. But maybe he won’t.

And if he doesn’t want to talk to me, I can’t force him. I know that much. It’s just hard to accept. 😢 Because when I care about someone or have fallen for them, I could never ignore them or cut them off.

click to expand

I understand,

I just think if he blocked you and that's his way of getting space... Well in that case not only is it poor communication but it's damaging too.

Ghosting is cowardly but perhaps he has his own dark issues to deal with. He said he didn't wanna fall in love with you, he was jealous and accused you of feeling for another....and now this. It's kind of negative and dramatic?

Perhaps you're better off? Dodging a bullet? Even if it feels like a dagger to the heart now... 😕

Not everyone gets a proper closure and in most cases when it happens... People are hardly ever satisfied.

Posted by Basorexia

Posted by LinAries

Posted by Basorexia

Posted by LinAries

Posted by Basorexia

Posted by LinAries

Posted by Basorexia

Damn... That scorpio moon is just a real treat isn't it? 😵



Blocking you means he's done with you .. Stop running after this guy.

Even if he’s done so in the heat of the moment, after me trying to pressure him to talk to me when he wasn‘t ready? Is there really no chance of him calming down and realizing he overreacted?

I also wonder how you can tell someone you‘ve fallen for them and then a few days later you just cut them off as if they never meant anything to you?! 😢

I don't know about you, but when I go out of my way to block someone - it means I'm done, no contact wanted with the blocked person.

I know it's hard for Aries to accept no desired contact (usually the men have a hard time with this.. ) but you need to drop it.

I'm not saying he's right... I'm simply saying you need to respect his wishes.

If he wants you he *knows where to find you...*

You have to be a little more loving to yourself and not give this much attention and power to this guy... Or guys in general.

You shouldn't have to convince someone to be with you... I say this often but it's true. Be kind to yourself.

I don’t block people. I always try to communicate and solve the issue. I think he blocked me at a time when he was really upset. And overreacting. And I‘ve seen him become upset and then go back to normal after a few days. So I thought there’s something I can do. Especially since he left that one line open...

I think my Taurus venus is having a hard time letting go of people in general. Also I‘m having a hard time accepting that he said he’s fallen in love with me one day and then blocking me the next.

It's absolutely okay to block people especially when you've reached that point of no return, some people don't get it. It gets ugly.

It's okay if you don't, communication is key.. but that's when you actually still have a relationship going. When the other party still wants to try.

I'm not judging you, I can only speak from my perspective and personal experience.. I think that's all we can do on dxpnet... Really.

He's blocked you, he's ignored your messages... Taurus venus or not...You're better off letting him be.

It can get uglier.

It’s not that I annoyed him over and over again. He wanted his time to think. I wanted to talk about it then and there. He got upset. I wouldn’t try to solve the issue if I didn’t think there’s was a chance he will calm down and realize that all I wanted was to communicate. But maybe he won’t.

And if he doesn’t want to talk to me, I can’t force him. I know that much. It’s just hard to accept. 😢 Because when I care about someone or have fallen for them, I could never ignore them or cut them off.

I understand,

I just think if he blocked you and that's his way of getting space... Well in that case not only is it poor communication but it's damaging too.

Ghosting is cowardly but perhaps he has his own dark issues to deal with. He said he didn't wanna fall in love with you, he was jealous and accused you of feeling for another....and now this. It's kind of negative and dramatic?

Perhaps you're better off? Dodging a bullet? Even if it feels like a dagger to the heart now... 😕

Not everyone gets a proper closure and in most cases when it happens... People are hardly ever satisfied.

click to expand

Yes, he definitely has his issues to deal with. The ex that repeatedly cheated on him. A quick temper. His behavior over the last two months seemed to finally make sense when he confessed he had fallen in love with me, but was trying to fight it until he knew for sure that I was trustworthy. Oh well... I tried my best to make it work.

Maybe I‘m better off indeed. Thank you for your perspective on this and your kind words! 🙂

Posted by greylatern

Posted by LinAries

Hey everyone,

hope you guys can help me.

So I met this cappy on a dating app back in May. We immediately clicked and I went to visit him two weeks later. I stayed for the weekend and things were going well apart from a misunderstanding. He did say he wanted to meet me again and see me more often. He also had plans to leave the country though. We met again two weeks later. He seemed distant and I felt like he rather wanted to spend time with his friends than try to connect with me. I also voiced my concerns and he basically snapped. I do have to say he had plans to leave the country two weeks later and tried to see as many friends as possible plus he had to move flats and was quite stressed about work as well. He went more cold and distant after our second weekend together. Plans to leave the country were cancelled, he‘s staying. I felt like he didn’t really want stay in touch at times, other times I thought he only wanted to stay friends. When I did talk to him about it, he got upset, only to come back after I messaged him again. He also accused me of having feelings for a guy-friend of mine, which I don’t. His ex-gf cheated on him for years, I guess that’s why he‘s so guarded.

Two weeks ago, I was about to visit him when he got jealous again, for absolutely no reason. He later confessed that he was in love with me but has been trying to fight it ever since my second visit. He said he wasn’t sure I felt the same and thought there were other guys involved and that he‘s sorry and will try to be less distant and cold from now on. He also said he wanted to be with me. I got invited to his annual trip to a race circuit. He was really sweet the first evening, we ended up sleeping together for the first time that night. The next day he said he wasn’t much for PDA in front of his friends. Also he gave me the cold shoulder all evening. I told him to not only talk to his female friend and roommate, but also to me. I also made a comment about him seemingly wanting to be with her rather than me. He got terribly upset about it. We were both tipsy that night, I have to add. I tried to talk to him a few times that night and the next day. He told me things were fine, but was short and really cold. I couldn’t enjoy the day anymore with him being distant, but I think he wanted me to act as if nothing ever happened. He tends to gloss over things. When I got home, he told me I ruined half of his weekend and that he needed time to think. I did tell him that I didn’t like a few things he did either. And gave him a lengthy explanation why I said the things about him preferring his female friend over me. He told me he was still thinking about things.

Two days later, I tried to talk to him again. He never replied, I got upset by that point and then he snapped as well. Told me to leave him alone, that I was getting on his nerves etc and then when I asked if I would ever hear from him again, he blocked me on his phone and WhatsApp.

I messaged him on the app we met. I apologized profusely and explained. He did read those messages. He knows that I have a past that makes me act the way I do. At first he only got on the app to read my messages. Today, he logged in a few times. I fear that he might be looking for someone new. He never replied to my messages, sadly. How can I win him back and get him to give me another chance?

He‘s Cap Sun, Scorpio Moon, Aqua Venus, Sag Mars, Libra Rising

I‘m Aries Sun, Libra Moon, Taurus Venus, Leo Mars and Virgo Rising

Would greatly appreciate any help!

You were far to territorial before you earned the right to be. You where both heavy projecting on each other. Him putting his past onto you and you picking up on the connection with the friend and making assumptions.

You need to reevaluate what went wrong and learn from that. Getting back together with these issues on both sides not addressed, is a recipe for disaster.

If you reconnect,

Talk out and share your feelings and thoughts with each other without judgement. Be a consuler to each other. That is what people who love each other do.

click to expand

Re: the assumptions about his friend. I already told him that I know I was wrong. I got along with that friend well btw. I even asked her for advise.

You’re right about the rest and I would like to talk it all out. He tends to gloss over problems though. Plus he is ignoring my messages, so not sure I will get the chance...