my have giving my aqua the wrong impression

the other day my aqua friend and I were talking and I asked him if he was dating and being intimate with other people, and he answered stating that he is dating but was not being intimate with other people. I asked because i wanted to protect myself to certaing point by finding what was going on with him in that sense. We were talking about this on the phone and he stated that he really didn't want to talk about this right now because it was not the right time for whatever reason. Well then i said ok, I just am a little confused about where I fit in all of this because he is my ex boyfriend and we have been seeing each other again. Well he said that he agreed that we needed to talk about it but I think he may have taken that as if I was trying to push for more right now and thats not what I was trying to convey at all. I do love him but do not want to push for anything more right now because I want to take things slow and get to know each other again. Well we had this conversation on Friday and I have not heard from him. We do not speak everyday , its just that he seemed a little irritated when we got off the phone. I want to call and just clafiy the statement that I made about being confused a little but I do not know if I should because i want thim to call. I just don't want him to take it the wrong way like I am trying to force something or push for more right now.

Should I call ?

by the way i was not being emotional or whiny I just spoke to him in a mature manor about what was going on.

don't call... go out and do your own thing...get your mind off him !!!

unusualcancer is right...he is dealing with it in his head right now, even though you don't think so. when he is ready, he will come to you and talk about everything...but it must be when he is ready to, so do not call and do not push him.

I haven't called and appericate your advice. Do you think he felt I was trying to push for more with that statement ? I also feel like, yes we are dating again but if he is still dating other people he must feel like there is still something better out there for him. Which is confusing because he stated that he regretted letting me go and regretted that we did not start off the right way before because he was still dealing on and off with someone else.

Starfish, I just remember from before that anytime he felt like he was being put on the spot, he would run and hide sometimes.I guess I am worried that I am going to lose him because I really don't know how he took it. Don't get me wrong, I felt I had every right to ask him what i did. Just confused...... because obviously he came back for a reason but just confused about what that reason is.

I am an Aquarian Female, with lots of Aquarian men in my life.

Aquarian men are free spirits, they do not like to feel trapped or cornered - they will run. They need to feel like they have their space and that their space is respected. So, i agree ... do not call.

He probably does not want to hurt you because you do have history with each other, but if i was you ... i would let go. The roller coaster that you are hopping on to, will not be enjoyable.

he could have also told her he was dating other girls to see what her reaction would be to it... if she had a really bad reaction, he may decide not to stay with her.

...not b/c he wants to see other girls, but b/c he doesn't want to feel tied down.

forever testing...yup!!! that's an aqua guy...

my reaction was very calm, and see I have learned not to get emotional with him because I know he hates that.

i don't think they want a clingy girl, but i think they like their girl to be jealous...just not drama queen jealous!!! i know my bf loves when i get jealous just a little bit...it helps boost his ego in a way!

crushbuddy...that is good that you stayed calm about it...it will get you a lot further than by being emotional with him.

I can't help but to think he might have been with someone when we were talking, he really wasn't trying to go into detail.

I agree don't call him at all. These aqua men can drive you insane if you let them. Play their game if you can. I'm a libra and i recently started dating this aqua guy who I like but after reading all these forums and more information on aquas I do my own thing to. We talk every week at least once and if we can we hang out. Both our lives are pretty busy which is a good thing as it keeps my mind off of him, but I wonder at times what he is doing. Yet, he is dating others i'm sure of that as he's told me that he can not committ to me right now becuase of his busy life. I'm okay with it though as I see it we both talked it over and we said if this relationship evolves into something more it would be fine but if it does not then move forward. I've gotten to the point in my life where hey time is precious and you can't wait around for someone and then find out he'll drop you in a second. What I don't understand is if aquas really like someone why do they have to keep dating, all they are doing is confusing themselves about their true feelings for someone who could be the one they've been looking for. I don't know but i'm learning with my aqua "friend." The majority of the time he calls me or text messeages me. So far we are moving slooooooooooooooooooooooow but I don't mind I still go out and do my own thing.

"What I don't understand is if aquas really like someone why do they have to keep dating, all they are doing is confusing themselves about their true feelings for someone who could be the one they've been looking for."

Do you mean dating other people or just sticking with the term dating...because we dont date around if we really like someone...but when he says he doesnt want commitment right now, he means it...thats why he keeps dating....BUT that could change in an hour, month, or two years....

thats the thing I thought he came back around because he realized he let a good thing go but now I don't know what to think . Is he being selfish ? Or is it because he still thinks there is better out there for him ? and if thats the case why bother starting this up again.

is to soon for me to assume he doesn't care because he is not stepping up ?

I know what I need to do, I am such a straight forward person and it drives me nuts that he can't just have mature conversation with me about this.

I agree , i am not going to push it. I'm just wondering if the reason he hasn't said anything is because he doesn't know hisself.

yes, crushbuddy the ball is in your court whether you believe it or not...but you can easily lose that privelege by losing your cool with him. i know it is hard to not think about how he feels or what he is thinking, etc...b/c with an aqua you spend more time worrying about them than yourself, but you need to focus on yourself. once you show your independence, he will definitely come around full circle.

Lady M

"What I don't understand is if aquas really like someone why do they have to keep dating, all they are doing is confusing themselves about their true feelings for someone who could be the one they've been looking for."

Do you mean dating other people or just sticking with the term dating...because we dont date around if we really like someone...but when he says he doesnt want commitment right now, he means it...thats why he keeps dating....BUT that could change in an hour, month, or two years....

I do mean dating other people......not saying that the aqua is interested in is doing it as i don't know, because he tells me he does not go on dates very often and is busy, however he has a myspace account and does note it that he is there for friends, dating and networking hmmmmm. I beleive this aqua as he has not given me a reason not to beleive him but I just don't understand how some aquas continue dating other people. Don't they mess with their own emotions? Makes life harder for them doesn't? Now the second part of your comment the my aqua "friend" did tell me he can not committ to me right now but all we said to each other is we would take it as it comes (day by day, week by week month by month) We talk every week and try to hang out as much as we can. We started seeing our dating or whatever you want to call it since October and we've been on 3 dates so you can see it's pretty slow, but we do talk every week at least once. I guess it's part of patience and taking out time as we both mentioned we don't want to rush into things. Maybe it's a good thing but as mentioned before I don't get this whole continuing to date others people.

I mean NEVER ask an Aqua guy where you stand with them...until it's your wedding day and you are standing next to him at the alter...LOL!"


Not to be mean or anything but I don't buy this line. See my aqua friend and I after our second date talked about where we stand because both of us were not ready for anything serious. Becaue aquas are straightforward and tell you the truth he seemed to be at ease and releived that we both had this conversation. Till this day we both still talk and go out. We are taking our time as we both agreed and take it as it comes. We both live busy lives and get together whenever possible but don't stress on the fact if we can not. If we can not hang out it's all good to both of us and we are okay with it. I guess it depends on age and what the situation is. We talk every weekend at first once now twice and we e-mail or text message each other. He does not like to make plans so if he calls I try to hook up but if i'm busy well then he completely understands. Therefore I must say the line up above that was suggested I don't buy it. I guess it depends on the aqua guy, his experiences and age. Any comments from aquas?

it's funny how some people can be so rude... (new thread on aqua board)...
i mean, we were just discussing amongst ourselves about aqua men, right— we didn't tell anyone that they had to read our posts or include their thoughts...if they didn't have any interest in the topic to begin with...makes me mad!!!

unusualcancer,
Let me now clarify something, I mean no harm with your statement. And in fact I do beleive in being patient. See now that my aqua "friend" and I talk more and longer we make each other laugh and joke around. When we hang out we are also cool and playfight. So you see, we are taking it slooooooooooooooooooooow and you know what we both like it. I somewhat feel like he does like me just by the way he looks at me at work and when we hang out, and by the things he says to me on the phone. I think we both were scared because at the beginning as we both had TONS of fun with each other, enjoyed each others company alot, yet we did not want to move fast. So you see I think if I had not brought up the subject we both would've been confused on what each other expected. I don't want to move fast with this aqua guy because I think something can evolve therefore I want to get to know him for all he is. Who knows maybe later he may not be the person that I do want to be with but for now he truly is a friend. I guess i'm being vague on how i'm explaining my situtation, but I know where you are coming from. I personally am happy and feel like my aqua friend is happy we both talked about it. Hope i've cleared it up a little and by all means I am not trying to be mean or offend anyone.