Stop me!!!

Hey guys!

Just spent 4 days STRAIGHT with the long distance Aqua... Had the most amazing time....as usual. He opened up to me in what seems like typical aqua style ... explaining away his aloofness...
He told me that although he may feel connected to people, he doesn't know how to talk about it.. it's just there, and he knows it. I thought this was intersting. I'm not sure if he was trying to tell me something...It seemed like 'code.' 🙂

As mentioned in the past, we don't talk about where we stand with eachother, we just enjoy one another... I did reiterate that I do not see other people, and he said he doesn't either, cause he doesn't want to...once again, 'code' perhaps? Code for, that's cause I like you? I don't know. lol

Anyway.... I've drafted up a note which I would like to send to him, it's light, nothing heavy...it just explains that I miss him when he's not around... and he's often in my thoughts given the distance between us... I am hopeful that by sending this I will open the lines of communication and allow for a better flow of feelings. Maybe he'll be more comfortable writing this stuff, then saying it.

The only things I have to go on in terms of knowing how he feels about me, is how affectionate he is with me....holding my hand, putting his arms around me, rubbing my back, he even kissed me in public the other night, in front of all his friends... he is also concerned for my well being telling me to be careful when I have to do any long distance driving, or going out alone at night... I take these as signs, cause they're all I have.

I guess I just want you guys to Stop me if you think I shouldnt send this note....especially if sending it means things could change between us...I just want to get him to open up...just slightly. lol

Hey! Thanks for your reply!!

That's interesting! We already compete in song lyrics... lol
We're both very much into the same bands... and often throw down quotes and lyrics.

I'll have to put some thought into this as my approach!

Thank you!

*nervous*

"I don't think you should send anything, he seems to be opening up already..Just keep doing what your doing, let it happen natutally..."

Thanks for your reply....



Can I get you to elaborate on 'let it happen naturally..?'

Cause It's natural for me to tell someone that I like them, and that I miss them, but I'm holding back for fear of the situation changing as a result...

🙂

"No, no, no!!! Please don't send any notes like this to him. The timing...is wrong...with an aqua. Things are going really well, do not spoil "the moment". If you send this...you will spoil the moment...for him."

LOL!! SEE!! This is why I come here!! 🙂

Ok UC... I'll hold off on the note....I find interesting the part you wrote about this being for the purpose of me wanting to open up to him...not for the purpose of trying to get him to open up to me...

Giving our dynamic (Age difference) I wonder if he hasn't opened up to me for fear of rejection... and perhaps he's waiting for a little something from me... I guess I'm wrong about this?

"Depends...what's the dynamic? I'm guessing you're older??"

Yes...I'm 6 years older then him.

no long notes!

Stimulate him with something that reminds him of you.

"Also...men are not interested in feeling secure the way women tend to be...they want to be kept on the edge of their seat."

Aint that the truth, the older I get start to realize men love all the suspense and drama, the unknown! It gets on my nerves but hey if you can't beat em then join em. I couldn't have said that 5 years ago as I get older the less I ask why, my motto is why not.

I know if I got that email, I wouldnt respond...and probably avoid you for a while. Thats just how it works....it will only send his insides into a tizzy. You cant force us to do anything we arent willing or ready to do.

"I know if I got that email, I wouldnt respond...and probably avoid you for a while. Thats just how it works....it will only send his insides into a tizzy. You cant force us to do anything we arent willing or ready to do."

M... Good to know!! 🙂 Thanks...

I'm not trying to force him do anything he's not ready to do... I'm just wondering if he's waiting on me for some kind of sign that he can move forward (Or not....) I wonder if he hasn't opened up cause I haven't (Probably not... but still... it's possible)

Anyway... suffice to say I won't send it! 🙂 lol

The ladies here gave you some awesome advice: Aqua Experts🙂

1. Go with the flow, no labels
2. Someone mentioned aquas understanding your feelings towards them...so true, even if we dont acknowledge it the way you would like....we arent clueless.
3. Someone also mentioned not messing with "The Moment"...please dont mess with the moment.

You clearly had a break through...ENJOY IT. No need to do anything else. We move at our own pace...whether it be a week or 3 years (I am DEAD serious about the '3yrs' part too) 😛


He hasnt opened up, b/c he's aqua, thats all.

"We move at our own pace...whether it be a week or 3 years (I am DEAD serious about the '3yrs' part too)"

-LOL!!! i can definitely vouch for that! i am actually going on 4 yrs now...and still waiting 🙂 they REALLY do take their sweet time.

I thought of Mark Ronson when I read this topic title. I love that song!

High Five Sadge!

^^^ too funny!!! but, it is nice to know we are all in the same boat 🙂

UPDATE:

Ok... so I sent the note. It was light, and simply letting him know I got home safely... yet oddly, for the first time since we met... this is the longest we have gone without a single communication! (6 DAYS) Interesting....well anyway, I refuse to contact him since I was the last to do so (Provided he receieved the email) Anyway... there's my update.

Good ol aqua torment....lol

🙂

Thanks UC!! You're right... *slaps herself*

I know he's not doing it purposely, but a damn is it frustrating when I want to hear from him! 🙂

Ok....Back to me...
🙂

"Well, Sadge, look at it this way...you had 4 days straight, intense 24/7 contact with your aqua...and then you had 6 days apart. In aqualand, I would suspect that 1 intense 24/7 day together of all-around intimacy would require AT LEAST 4 days of "space" to recuperate/rejuvenate from such intimacy, so...that would mean things are going quite smoothly."

LoL.. Great way too look at it! Thanks UC...

Why are they like this though? Is it a mystery? Actually, given that it's an Aqua thing, there must be COLD HARD LOGIC behind it... no? 🙂

This brings me to another question... since Aqua's motto seems to be go with the flow... do they ever 'go with the flow' even though they may not want to? Actually, let me be more clear... would they ever appease you simply because they know it's what YOU want, and not necessarily what they want...?

i think sadge may have come on a bit too strong in the note, if it says what i think it says. but, i could be wrong.

"the problem is YOU!!! both of you. you fail to have expectations. and what expectations you do have, when they are not met, instead of putting your self respect first you decide to blame "aqua" behavior."

He is not treating me badly... and perhaps my expectations are a little unrealisitic at this time anyway. This is why I visit this message board to keep myself in check.

FYI: I found this interesting....

"It's when he acts as though he doesn't like you that he's close to being hooked, and the reason is elementary- simple logic. The Aquarian water bearer likes everybody. Everyone is his friend. He'll even refer to his worst enemy as "my friend." So it means something when he says he doesn't like someone. Just what it means may take some study. The various nuances can be complicated."

dont send it!!!!! now iam like the 5th person to say that lol!

It's been sent...lol...but trust that it was light, and no response was required.

He actually contacted me today.... (1 week to the day since I last saw him)
Just checking in I guess.... the way they do... the way they keep us hanging on....

*sigh*