Aries, so stubborn, so one sided.

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doublesidedGem
@doublesidedGem
11 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 101 · Topics: 15
My girlfriend of 6 months is an Aries, I'm a Gemini. 5th of December last year, my brother died suddenly, no warning no nothing, goes out one night and never comes back, he was my younger brother and I'm finding it so hard to deal with. My girlfriend has been an absolute rock, I couldn't fault her for being there. But lately it's like I feel I have a certain amount of time to grieve before she's had enough of what I'm going through and want's was there before. We had an epsiode where we was due to go away before Christmas, but my brother so we couldn't go. The airline only refund a quarter of her money, but the whole of my amount. I told her I'd split the refund, which I didn't have to do. When we were planning another I told her to transfer the remaining balance minus the money I was going to give her. She kept banging on about "owing" her so I said well no, it was a nice move on my part to even do it, without her even prompting. Next thing she kicks off, I "should've been morally obligated to do that! The argument evolves she's taken things out of context, told me it's over, blocked me from whatsapp. We get round to having some what of a civil discussion, to which she says if I dot seek help (bereavement counselling) she can't consider being with me. I was due to go out last night, but with all of that emotions running high, i didn't want to drive. She was supposed to be coming down today for the weekend, obviously she's told me it's over said we'll talk it out but mentioned nothigng of coming down, she's done it before where we've cancelled everything planned. So I make arrangements with my friend to meet him tonight, she messages me this morning, "oh you coming up later" well no I arranged to see blah blah, now she feel's snubbed and we're back where we were last night. Should I have sat waiting for her, bear in mind she ended it. Now she tells me I don't care for her enough, if I did I would've known to keep tonight free, but I said I'd see her yesterday to sort it, she tells me no, then when I mention that, her response is, we never had plans for that day I just can't seem to say the right thing. Unless I agree wholeheartedly with her and where she comes from anything I say or feel is irrelevant. She also said that us continuing is based on me seeking help.

It's a wall of text but how can I get her to see where I'm coming or even if I use the wrong choice of words she's got her thinking cap on then goes down these avenues that aren't even plausible. I've lost my brother and I'm emotionally in a wreck at the moment, but I have never stopped showing her how much she means to me. I sent her messages to tell her before this, and got form her "where did that come from" when I don't do that, she's questoning my fondnss, caring, love for her, and tells me if someone cared that much tha
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rockyroadicecream
@rockyroadicecream
13 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 1243 · Posts: 16617 · Topics: 170
Dealing with a death close to you puts a lot of perspective on those around you in life. Basically, you know who's legit in your time of need.

If this is how she's going to act when you're going through something so traumatizing, it's time for you to reconsider this person as a partner.

As was mentioned above- move on.

I just had to do the same thing over the span of the last year. I lost my mom and I learned real fast who I could rely on and who were pieces of garbage that I didn't need in my life. I also deactivated my social media bs because that was also tied to some of that stuff.

It's like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders and it's rather freeing. You should try the same, ESPECIALLY since you're so early on in the grieving process. You cannot grieve properly when you have people like her around. Surround yourself with supportive individuals, not emotional leeches who couldn't care less about your own emotions right now.
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xomelindabelle
@xomelindabelle
10 Years1,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 1 · Posts: 1641 · Topics: 110
This has nothing to do with a sun sign; she is clearly extremely self-centered and delusional. Some people truly do have double standards, and make it so the focus is always on them. Even with the tiniest things, their compassion completely nonexistent.
I'm very sorry for your loss. You deserve a lot better than this. She definitely sounds like the type that likes to manipulate, guilt-trip and control. I'd get as far away from her as you can!