Is this Aries Specific?

Hey All! Long time listener, first time caller!
I've been following posts on the Aries and Scorpio (imagine that) boards for over a year now and just finally attempting my first topic. Thanks to all for their great insight and advice.
Now I'm having a major issue with my best friend who's a Libra. I love her to death and I've always tried to be as careful as possible and keep my mouth shut (to a certain point), but now I can't stands it no more!! I'm about to have an explosion and am needing some advice.
Do any fellow Aries out there feel like they are being a better friend when they are voicing their opinion instead of sitting back watching their loved ones make HUGE mistakes? There are certain things I just cannot keep quiet about, but I'm afraid it will drive her away for good. Lately she prefaces sentences with "now, don't judge me, but..."
What kind of friend would I be if I was like "sure...ruin your life! Now, let's go have a drink!!" I just can't do it. All I hear back from her is "I know..." Well, if you know then why are
you still doing it?
Can anyone relate to this general issue? Thanks for "listening".
By the way I'm an Aries Sun, Gemini Moon and Pisces Rising. She's a
Libra Sun, Taurus Moon and Pisces Rising.

Well, it is the general trait of an Aries to be upright, truthful, and forward. Especially, if it comes to people they love. You know your friend best so you know if she needs the wake up call or not. But in true spirit of the Aries, sure! Jump right in 😉.

I usually don't have that problem because I have a Virgo rising. It doesn't mean I'm dishonest, it's just I can keep some truths from people, all too ready to please, and not ready for any confrontations.

Posted by ramfishtwins
Lately she prefaces sentences with "now, don't judge me, but..."
What kind of friend would I be if I was like "sure...ruin your life! Now, let's go have a drink!!" I just can't do it. All I hear back from her is "I know..." Well, if you know then why are
you still doing it?

I regularly want to grab my friends and shake them because they make poor choices all the time. You don't need to tell her she's being a dumb, she already knows. I actually wouldn't say anything in response to whatever she's saying. Her preface of "don't judge me" is saying that her mind is made up so nothing you have to say will help her see the light. Don't get heated over something you have no control over. I know my exact response would be to shrug my sholders and poor my ass a tall glass of the sweet stuff and make hers a double.

Well I'm Libra and hearing almost anything from an Aries is always blunt. In your case, I think it's best to give her a comparative situation that had a negative ending. That way you're not coming directly at her and make her run away, but she can think on the possibilities before doing something stupid. Always talk to a Libra, never AT us.

Thanks for all the great advice! You are correct JO that it's best not to talk AT a Libra...I guess that's probably the case with most of us regardless of our chart positions.
It's just so hard to see someone you love make detrimental choices that not only harm them but others. Plus, I'm always the one she comes running too when all hell breaks lose. I guess that's what best friends are for...but man is it tough expecially cause I'm so vocal and she's a don't rock the boat/no wave-maker Libra.

don't rock the boat/no wave-maker Libra. - LMAO!!!

Only a person truly tired of falling will stop falling, just keep a first-aid kit near.

Hhhhmmmmmm ...... ok .....



First and foremost .... you don't know if what a person does or does not do is right or wrong for them .... you only know if it would be right or wrong for yourself. So, your whole concern of, "instead of sitting back watching their loved ones make HUGE mistakes" .... is really nothing more than you wanting to control her for some reason.

You have no clue why a person who isn't you, needs to experience something in their life .. the reality could very well be that whatever it is she is doing at this stage in her life in which you don't approve of, could actually be a life-lesson for her.

You don't know that ... so, why don't you just be a friend and leave your control issues in check.


Second ... for her to say, "Now, don't judge me" ... actually refutes your self-proclamation of, "I've always tried to be as careful as possible and keep my mouth shut" .... because the fact of the matter is, if you actually kept your mouth shut when it comes to judgeing her according to your own standards, then she would never feel compelled to tell you not to do it before she revealed this info to you.

Ah P-Angel...I knew you'd welcome me with open arms!! LOL...
I do see what you are saying. I know I can be judgemental at times to a fault. I have not explained exactly what the issues are, but if I did you may think differently about them being wrong for me and not necessarily for her. Basically she's going through a divorce and making bad choices that have directly hurt me in the process not to mention other VIP's.
I've only just started opening my mouth. We've been friends for 8 years, but just became very close in the last 2. She has told me things & we've been through things that no one else knows and I've always been there for her. But, the situation is becoming more and more disturbing and I'm finding it harder to keep my mouth shut.

Well, it would be helpful if you indulged us in the whole story. From what you've given us we can only make our own judgments from what we've read. Basically, we could just flip a coin and the results wouldn't make much difference to us.

Thanks Love...I appreciate that and you are correct. The reason I do love her so much is because we are so different. We usually bring out the best in each other. But lately I've had little effect. I'm just worried about her and I intend on talking to her tonight about it...just being very careful to not come off at judgmental (not sure how that's going to work!) I think she needs to know she hurt me and she's hurting herself.

My problem is more general in nature Xtina...just curious if most Aries have the issue of boldly expressing their opinion or if it was just my deal. Do they feel like they are helping more then possibly hurting? It's difficult for me to accept people just the way the are.

ramfishtwins,
everyone goes through exactly what you're going through... hell some of the advice here is based on everyone's POV... however, turning a blind eye to not 'speaking-out' what is seen is hard for aries...
as time goes by, you begin to consider things like:
'what is I don't say a thing, what will be the potential result?'
'am I really helping or just ramming my way down someone else's throat?'
'does this person really need my help or even ask for it?'
'do I even really care as it is not my cross to bear?'...........................

My closest friends are have been Libras, you can be as blunt as you like but use a joke or a smile to temper it - or put it across intelligently or start with 'if I were you, I would...blah blah...' they are air signs and will respond to anything put across with icing on it - Libra is also a cardinal sign just like aries and will NOT be led...

Just think more and consider more not from your POV but from hers or others, then the feeling that you will explode if you don't speak will temper off...

Posted by ramfishtwins
just curious if most Aries have the issue of boldly expressing their opinion or if it was just my deal. Do they feel like they are helping more then possibly hurting? It's difficult for me to accept people just the way the are.

meh i'm a firm believer in letting people be self-sufficient, self-motivated and self-generated. Hopefully your friend can figure it out on her own the way you??re able to for yourself. We can't think for someone else.
We??re taught that should be stumble upon the suffering of others we need to try and give relief and assistance so naturally our first concerns become to relieve the suffering of others. By doing that we??re making suffering and pain the most important aspect of life because it's the focal point. We have this need to fix or else there might be pain...we can't just live or let other people live, we??re scared there will be pain. fight the urge!!!