StingTailedLibra
@LibraLovesHim
9 Years1,000+ Posts
Comments: 9 · Posts: 3545 · Topics: 253
Well that was a flash in the pan...
Is this the Aries with Taurus Mars guy?
Posted by dolluxeI dont know!!! Waaaahhhh!
What happened? Jezus I'm following y'alls story smh..
Posted by MyStarsShineExactly...i'm feeling pretty confused. It maybe all in my head right enough and overthinking things because I like him so much and i'm trying to play it cool, as much as a Leeb that's falling possibly can LOL!
Is this the Aries with Taurus Mars guy?
Posted by dolluxeIt may be issues with communication but I dont wanna be one of these girls that don't listen when a guy says "i want to be your friend"
What happened? Jezus I'm following y'alls story smh..
This came after I asked him about the FWBs thing-is that what he wanted-he said "baby you're bad, no I dont want FWB, that wouldn't be fair"
I'm kinda scared to get hurt tbh 😢 such a pussy. But its been years since ive started to feel like this for something and its making me really anxious. I don't want to ruin it so I guess its also good for me if we are "friends"
Everything else has to go though, physical closeness, future talks, love emojis etc LOL! I don't do that ish with FRIENDS!
I feel like he wants to sound good, or say the right thing-I can pick up that he is a people pleaser, I want authenticity!
Posted by dolluxeNo he keeps trying to clarify if thats what I want...LOL. Then after speaking about it he said he wants to be my friend 😕
He wants to be FWB. Back off Libra, back off! We Venusians don't do that shit! 😄
The friend word has me confused-I told him I have some feelings to lose then ill gladly try be his friend. He said sorry if he sent mixed signals. SMH.
Lol at men chancing their arm
Posted by AriesLoveI do believe he is testing me, for sure I'll ask myself why to this since its pretty foreign to me although I may assume its to do with his past relationship and he has voiced that he wants to make sure next time he is offering everything its to a women who will fully appreciate it and not abuse it. Ive just never been treated like this before, i'm very live and let live and if someone trips themself up so be it. I have read Aries like to test though.
When you have to constantly ask "why" for everything a person says or does usually a sign of miscommunication and incompatibility.
Posted by ImpulsvI figured 2 months is not long enough to be throwing commitment out there, I didnt want to scare him away...Posted by LibraLovesHimI think it's two people saving facePosted by dolluxeNo he keeps trying to clarify if thats what I want...LOL. Then after speaking about it he said he wants to be my friend 😕
He wants to be FWB. Back off Libra, back off! We Venusians don't do that shit! 😄
The friend word has me confused-I told him I have some feelings to lose then ill gladly try be his friend. He said sorry if he sent mixed signals. SMH.
I mean if he wanted clarification if that's what u wanted
This was the time to say "no
I want a committed relationship . "
But his friendship comment killed it n now u know.
It could have been to save face but we will never know
U go by his words. Just don't understand why u couldn't say what u wanted?click to expand
I guess staying neutral was the path of least resistance. I maybe wrong, what do I know...i'm still learning. I'll get it right one day 🙂 Anyway hes asked me to go with him this wkend to his bosses place for a BBQ-now what would be your advice-IF he's still treating me (touching me, hugs, kissing, protective, looks, etc etc) like we are an item-how should I best handle it? Reciprocate, or bring up the fact he wanted my friendship only and its not really what friends do?
Posted by Capri-sunI know what I want. I just dont respond well to communication-esp when its to gauge my responses. I want to just BE. Let it flow. I "felt" he was into me in a genuine way, and i'm pretty sure I was doing my best to give him those vibes also!
Why don't people know what they want going in?
Posted by AriesLoveWe sure have, spoke about goals for future, what he wants from a relationship, etc etc. 2 months with him were like 6 with someone else. Ive never experienced that before. Which is why i'm baffled when he comes out with "slampiece" nonsense.
The real question is why do people fall so hard after a month or 2?
Take your time getting to know someone. This is an opportunity for "both" of you all to get to know each other and see if you want a relationship with the other.
Did you all even have conversations about what you want, your desires, aspirations in general? I mean those first few dates would determine his intentions as a man.
Posted by AriesLoveI know this! Im very well aware of this and am not obssessed whatsoever, its been overwhelming for me. Which is why ive backed off and not seen him the last few times hes wanted or been keeping up with his messaging etc. Ive been alone too damn long and got comfortable with it-thats who i am in a relationship also, I want my space. Appreciate your input but dont get it twisted.Posted by LibraLovesHimYou need to learn how to control your emotions and not become obsessed with someone. Seriously it's not healthy and you end up of loosing yourself and doing things against your character. He's just a man.Posted by AriesLoveWe sure have, spoke about goals for future, what he wants from a relationship, etc etc. 2 months with him were like 6 with someone else. Ive never experienced that before. Which is why i'm baffled when he comes out with "slampiece" nonsense.
The real question is why do people fall so hard after a month or 2?
Take your time getting to know someone. This is an opportunity for "both" of you all to get to know each other and see if you want a relationship with the other.
Did you all even have conversations about what you want, your desires, aspirations in general? I mean those first few dates would determine his intentions as a man.
click to expand
Posted by ImTheRamSo I have a feeling he will continue to treat me like we are an item after saying he wanted my friendship, would you recommend I don't respond to it and remind him we are friends?Posted by AriesLoveI agree with basicly everything you said.
The real question is why do people fall so hard after a month or 2?
Take your time getting to know someone. This is an opportunity for "both" of you all to get to know each other and see if you want a relationship with the other.
Did you all even have conversations about what you want, your desires, aspirations in general? I mean those first few dates would determine his intentions as a man.
Except for the last part..
*Feelings* and *future* should not be a *thing* to talk on the first months...those are the suposed to be the *fun* months (totally agree with you) 🙂
As for the first dates being an indicative of how that will plan out...hummm
I am not sure about that....
People change with time...and there are alot of *masks* during the first dates...be them good or bad masks...
A very sweet guy could turn out to be a *monster*...and a *monster* at first could really be a sweet guy...
Peoples perceptions and realisation of reality change with time as "the masks fall"...
Knowing how to *behave* in the *timmings* of a rship...now thats the right thing to do (as you said) 😉
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Posted by AriesLoveI am that 🙂 I aint that cut up about it. On the forum to chit chat and get insight. My life doesnt end with him, or dxp lol-this is just the part of me that IS exposed around here.Posted by LibraLovesHimBut you entertain BS. You know it's BS. So I really don't know what the issue is. You continue to entertain him or cut him off. Is it really that hard? You are putting yourself through this.Posted by AriesLoveI know this! Im very well aware of this and am not obssessed whatsoever, its been overwhelming for me. Which is why ive backed off and not seen him the last few times hes wanted or been keeping up with his messaging etc. Ive been alone too damn long and got comfortable with it-thats who i am in a relationship also, I want my space. Appreciate your input but dont get it twisted.Posted by LibraLovesHimYou need to learn how to control your emotions and not become obsessed with someone. Seriously it's not healthy and you end up of loosing yourself and doing things against your character. He's just a man.Posted by AriesLoveWe sure have, spoke about goals for future, what he wants from a relationship, etc etc. 2 months with him were like 6 with someone else. Ive never experienced that before. Which is why i'm baffled when he comes out with "slampiece" nonsense.
The real question is why do people fall so hard after a month or 2?
Take your time getting to know someone. This is an opportunity for "both" of you all to get to know each other and see if you want a relationship with the other.
Did you all even have conversations about what you want, your desires, aspirations in general? I mean those first few dates would determine his intentions as a man.
click to expand
Be friends. Why not? You can be his rescue when he picks fights with strangers. 🙂
Posted by AriesLoveWe have very different outlooks but I absolutely agree with you on this.
When you have to constantly ask "why" for everything a person says or does usually a sign of miscommunication and incompatibility.
Posted by LibraLovesHimSounds to me like he's been fishing to find out where your head is and where you two are headed. He said that he wants to be sure the next woman he gives his heart to is in it 100% . So because you couldn't get real and let him know what you want he's pulled back and said 'let's be friends' to protect himself.Posted by Capri-sunI know what I want. I just dont respond well to communication-esp when its to gauge my responses. I want to just BE. Let it flow. I "felt" he was into me in a genuine way, and i'm pretty sure I was doing my best to give him those vibes also!
Why don't people know what they want going in?click to expand
What I don't understand is why your afraid to tell him your catching feelings and want a relationship...but not afraid to fuck him. Doesn't make sense to me.
Rip that band aid off and find out where you stand. If it's not where you were hoping at least your not investing more time and feels.
Posted by AriesLoveThe way a man talks about an ex tells you alot about who he is as a person.
Some women hate to hear about the last girlfriend. Not me, tell me all about her. I'm like you can talk to me. Lol I want to be your friend first.
Posted by dolluxeWisest advice yet.
OP it's either you back off or stay. If you're certain he's not banging another chick then I don't see any problem with your situation. Just enjoy the ride with him. The next time he asks you if he's your "slampiece" just answer him with a smile and smash him. That'll shut him up. Don't reveal your feelings too soon. If you do, there's no challenge for him anymore IMO.
Posted by LadyNeptuneYou see some people are saying find out where you stand-reveal how I feel you mean? and others are saying don't reveal my feelings to soon. Lol confused much. He's invited me over to his bosses tonight to help with the pre thanksgiving prep. I guess I should just enjoy the ride. The reason ive been fucking about also is because im afraid to get hurt, he says he is also. His vibes just leave me confused at times-and now this friend word been thrown in he mix i'm not sure how to proceed 😕 I think ill just keep it the same.Posted by LibraLovesHimSounds to me like he's been fishing to find out where your head is and where you two are headed. He said that he wants to be sure the next woman he gives his heart to is in it 100% . So because you couldn't get real and let him know what you want he's pulled back and said 'let's be friends' to protect himself.Posted by Capri-sunI know what I want. I just dont respond well to communication-esp when its to gauge my responses. I want to just BE. Let it flow. I "felt" he was into me in a genuine way, and i'm pretty sure I was doing my best to give him those vibes also!
Why don't people know what they want going in?
What I don't understand is why your afraid to tell him your catching feelings and want a relationship...but not afraid to fuck him. Doesn't make sense to me.
Rip that band aid off and find out where you stand. If it's not where you were hoping at least your not investing more time and feels.
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I told him last night that I missed him and he said "good that means you still like me, I miss you too" 🙂
Posted by LadyNeptuneHe gave her everything and she cheated on him. She was apparently a bit crazy-tells people she's a certain ethnicity to try and sound more exotic. Basically to me sounds very insecure. And she'd accuse him of all sorts.Posted by AriesLoveThe way a man talks about an ex tells you alot about who he is as a person.
Some women hate to hear about the last girlfriend. Not me, tell me all about her. I'm like you can talk to me. Lol I want to be your friend first.
click to expand
Posted by AriesLoveSame here!Posted by ImTheRamSome women hate to hear about the last girlfriend. Not me, tell me all about her. I'm like you can talk to me. Lol I want to be your friend first.Posted by AriesLoveHaa...now i know were you were trying to get 😉Posted by ImTheRamThey have conversation about things "in general" not necessarily about the future of them. Just each other's wants and needs from an individual.Posted by AriesLoveI agree with basicly everything you said.
The real question is why do people fall so hard after a month or 2?
Take your time getting to know someone. This is an opportunity for "both" of you all to get to know each other and see if you want a relationship with the other.
Did you all even have conversations about what you want, your desires, aspirations in general? I mean those first few dates would determine his intentions as a man.
Except for the last part..
*Feelings* and *future* should not be a *thing* to talk on the first months...those are the suposed to be the *fun* months (totally agree with you) 🙂
As for the first dates being an indicative of how that will plan out...hummm
I am not sure about that....
People change with time...and there are alot of *masks* during the first dates...be them good or bad masks...
A very sweet guy could turn out to be a *monster*...and a *monster* at first could really be a sweet guy...
Peoples perceptions and realisation of reality change with time as "the masks fall"...
Knowing how to *behave* in the *timmings* of a rship...now thats the right thing to do (as you said) 😉
A man or woman usually provides some details about what they want from life....careers, goals, people etc.
If I'm on a date with a guy and we are conversing I love to talk about past relationships, even though some people don't. It gives me an idea of his life, how he treats women and how they treat him. From there it kind of opens up if he's ready for another relationship or just playing the field. It's all about being subtle but still analyzing a situation. I'm the best at that.
You know that...this is a trait that us Aries use..alot...and are experts at it...specially if he or she knows how to do it 😉
I do that also..and i am kinda of..an "master" on it also hehe
So yes, now i know what you were talking about ^^ makes sense 🙂
Something that mere *mortals* cant pull off haha jk ^^ 🙂
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Posted by ImTheRam"Doesn't want to hurt me in the end"Posted by LibraLovesHimAn item? Comeone...we Aries are not like that at all...Posted by ImTheRamSo I have a feeling he will continue to treat me like we are an item after saying he wanted my friendship, would you recommend I don't respond to it and remind him we are friends?Posted by AriesLoveI agree with basicly everything you said.
The real question is why do people fall so hard after a month or 2?
Take your time getting to know someone. This is an opportunity for "both" of you all to get to know each other and see if you want a relationship with the other.
Did you all even have conversations about what you want, your desires, aspirations in general? I mean those first few dates would determine his intentions as a man.
Except for the last part..
*Feelings* and *future* should not be a *thing* to talk on the first months...those are the suposed to be the *fun* months (totally agree with you) 🙂
As for the first dates being an indicative of how that will plan out...hummm
I am not sure about that....
People change with time...and there are alot of *masks* during the first dates...be them good or bad masks...
A very sweet guy could turn out to be a *monster*...and a *monster* at first could really be a sweet guy...
Peoples perceptions and realisation of reality change with time as "the masks fall"...
Knowing how to *behave* in the *timmings* of a rship...now thats the right thing to do (as you said) 😉
This guy likes you...you are just pressuring way way way to much...
It takes some time (alot) for us to give in on our real feelings...
Every time you pressure...he backs off...
You know why? I can almost bet that this is because he isnt sure about is own feelings (afection, infatuation or even love..) so he backs off everytime and since he doesnt what to hurt you on the end...
He says freinds...we value alot freindship..
Chill libra..give him space...let him come to you and...dont pressure him at all...
🙂
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I guess this is what i'm worried about 😉 Its either jump in and take the risk or back off now. I like him alot though-so I may possibly end up glutton for punishment. GRRRREAT!
Libra = the eternal search for the other
Libra = we
Aries = me
Libra = we
Aries = me
Posted by LibraLovesHimWho brought up the ex? How often is the ex a topic of discussion? How long was the relationship? How long ago did it end? Does he emote when speaking of the ex?
He gave her everything and she cheated on him. She was apparently a bit crazy-tells people she's a certain ethnicity to try and sound more exotic. Basically to me sounds very insecure. And she'd accuse him of all sorts.
You may be in a rebound. You may be competing against her behavior.... being judged and examined based on what went on in his previous relationship which is wrong and unhealthy. However, it is appropriare for you to judge him on his previous relationship... Don't examine his ex, examine him. What does his relationship with her say about him? Be subtle, very, very subtle. Listen carefully but to learn about his character, judgement.
What did she accuse him of?
It's not an Aries male thing but, a man thing... a man on the rebound. Think about a similar heartbreak you experienced. Are you rebounding too?
Everbody doesn't rebound. Some move on and mean it...done. No love lost. It depends on the person. Some relationships are rebound worthy like if the relationship end was abrupt, a surprise, shocking; for example, cheating.
Possible signs are: moving very fast and slow at the same time; lots of sex ( fucking the pain away); acting like a longterm relationship with no commitment; previous relationship end was a shock; bitterness towards ex; you look like the ex.
Posted by VenusAquariusPosted by LibraLovesHimWho brought up the ex? How often is the ex a topic of discussion? How long was the relationship? How long ago did it end? Does he emote when speaking of the ex?
He gave her everything and she cheated on him. She was apparently a bit crazy-tells people she's a certain ethnicity to try and sound more exotic. Basically to me sounds very insecure. And she'd accuse him of all sorts.
You may be in a rebound. You may be competing against her behavior.... being judged and examined based on what went on in his previous relationship which is wrong and unhealthy. However, it is appropriare for you to judge him on his previous relationship... Don't examine his ex, examine him. What does his relationship with her say about him? Be subtle, very, very subtle. Listen carefully but to learn about his character, judgement.
What did she accuse him of?
It's not an Aries male thing but, a man thing... a man on the rebound. Think about a similar heartbreak you experienced. Are you rebounding too?
Everbody doesn't rebound. Some move on and mean it...done. No love lost. It depends on the person. Some relationships are rebound worthy like if the relationship end was abrupt, a surprise, shocking; for example, cheating.
Possible signs are: moving very fast and slow at the same time; lots of sex ( fucking the pain away); acting like a longterm relationship with no commitment; previous relationship end was a shock; bitterness towards ex; you look like the ex.
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On point
OP, he sounds like he's protecting himself.. He has a shield up. Def need more info about the ex
Posted by SofiaV87So with the ex he said he knew it was over but stayed in it hoping it would get better-until she cheated then he decided it over and planned his move. He found a new job and left the country he was working in also-not his home place. They were together for around 2.5yrs-he left the country in Aug. We spoke about her maybe 2-3times when I first met him with the final time him saying anyway lets not talk about her anymore.
OP, he sounds like he's protecting himself.. He has a shield up. Def need more info about the ex
His thoughts were basically do not cheat-if something is going on or wrong let us speak about it. He likes to talk about things ALOT, and also know everything about me-it really threw me, ive never known anyone basically want to know me inside out in such a short space of time. Of course there are little tid bits ive kept to myself to give away over time.
We just had an amazing Thanksgiving at his colleagues with his speech that he's in a very happy place-and he winked at me, his colleagues piped in "that would be your doing missy" Very sweet 🙂
When i'm with him there are no issues whatsoever its just so natural and feels amazing, I guess yes I get to overthinking esp when he says things that throw me. I told him for now I don't want to talk about an us, i just want to BE us. (Unless there is something thats real necessary) I leave in a week, the month apart should do us good.
Happy Thanksgiving Everyone! Hope you all had a wonderful day and thank you all for entertaining my ups and downs around here 🙂
Posted by SofiaV87I'll just add also, my friend who introduced us had told me he broke up with his ex recently-so if this guy knows this yes I should be careful and make sure i'm just not being kept around for ego/rebound purposes. Like maybe he was trying to "hook him up" although I can never ask this.
OP, he sounds like he's protecting himself.. He has a shield up. Def need more info about the ex
I do feel he is more intimate with me now though and the sex has taken a massive improvement...there was something a little reserved-like we weren't properly coming together previously. Maybe the week apart and time to ourselves and our thoughts and the unsureness of where each other stood. I just feel more for him each time-certainly not that I love him but its just feelings that i'm growing familiar to again.
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