ScorpioFish
@ScorpioFish
14 Years1,000+ PostsPisces
Comments: 5 · Posts: 4180 · Topics: 103
Borerline Personality Disorder and Cancer
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@scorpiofish...so the only reason she broke up with you is because she has a mental illness?..
you are truly special...
you are truly special...
You people are truly jerkin' it...
Posted by ScorpioFish
Ladies and Gentlemen, after several years of agonizing pain from the breakup of a Decan II cancer girl and myself, I have often questioned many things in a fruitless search for answers as to why she left me. However, today I have had what many alcoholics refer to as a "moment of clarity.". You see, after careful reading, she may suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder, a mental illness that hurts millions of men and women each year. While the attaches link below is by no means applicable to all Cancer women, I do ask the group if anyone has ever interacted with BPD girls, and if so, what was her sign? I sense that of the three Cancer deacans, part II is most likely to have this unfortunate condition because of their constant need to be correct, as well as in control of things.
Source:
http://gettinbetter.com/anycost.html<BR>
i don't know many cancer girls, but one i do know has bpd. she's a lovely girl and deals with the condition well.
i also have a sag-cap friend, and i'll just say this: when you don't know why they react to things the way they do, it's hellish. since she was diagnosed i understand her much better, and it's a case of being patient with her...their need for control/constant reassurance stems from insecurity. in that way, it's easier to be a good friend to her because i understand where she's coming from.
bpd takes quite a toll on relationships, from what i've seen.
Oh god I hate when people do this.
Has she actually been diagnosed with it?
Has she actually been diagnosed with it?
Posted by Sagittarius89
Oh god I hate when people do this.
Has she actually been diagnosed with it?
You didn't know, almost everyone here on DXP have PHD's......lmaorotf!!!!!!!!
Posted by CrabbyTwinsPosted by Sagittarius89
Oh god I hate when people do this.
Has she actually been diagnosed with it?
You didn't know, almost everyone here on DXP have PHD's......lmaorotf!!!!!!!!click to expand
Yea right
That is funny cause I actually have BPD and he has no idea what the hell he is talking about
That site you got your info off of is totally crap too.
You wanna talk to people who have BPD? I wouldn't ever dare go off of that shit you have.
They will get triggered and rip your face off
I know a good site if you'd like some questions answered though
You wanna talk to people who have BPD? I wouldn't ever dare go off of that shit you have.
They will get triggered and rip your face off
I know a good site if you'd like some questions answered though
Posted by cowpuncherPosted by Sagittarius89
That site you got your info off of is totally crap too.
You wanna talk to people who have BPD? I wouldn't ever dare go off of that shit you have.
They will get triggered and rip your face off
I know a good site if you'd like some questions answered though
Well, since the guy started the topic with the expressed purpose of discussing women with BPD, and seems to be looking for more information than just the site he shared... maybe it would be a good idea to share the site you are referring to as having better information Sag89? I know I'd like to check it out, and I bet you ScorpioFish will want to as well.click to expand
Sure I totally will
Posted by ScorpioFish
Ladies and Gentlemen, after several years of agonizing pain from the breakup of a Decan II cancer girl and myself, I have often questioned many things in a fruitless search for answers as to why she left me. However, today I have had what many alcoholics refer to as a "moment of clarity.". You see, after careful reading, she may suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder, a mental illness that hurts millions of men and women each year. While the attaches link below is by no means applicable to all Cancer women, I do ask the group if anyone has ever interacted with BPD girls, and if so, what was her sign? I sense that of the three Cancer deacans, part II is most likely to have this unfortunate condition because of their constant need to be correct, as well as in control of things.
Source:
http://gettinbetter.com/anycost.html<BR>
I just broke up with my Scorpio boyfriend of 5 years. I joined this site today, just now, in hopes of finding answers. Scorpio and Cancer is a very, very difficult bond to break. My heart aches.
My ex is an active addict and he suffers from mental illness, although I don't think he has been properly diagnosed. So, if he's an addict, what does that make me? It is said you tend to attract people who are where you are psychologically ...
Also, I wanted to add that II decan Cancers are heavily influenced by Scorpio characteristics.
Considering I am like, totally an expert in like, EVERYTHING..... here's my take on this..... it went something like this....
Hey there, lookie loo, this here article was written by someone with a Master of Arts in Psychology!!!! That must meaan they know like, EVERYTHING.
But wait......
Has this article ever been peer reviewed?
NO
Are the person's credentials clearly stated?
NO
Additionally, I found some equally intrinsically unsound websites debunking her "education" and her theories..... I''d post them, but if you have half a brain cell and want to do your own research it comes up ON THE FIRST PAGE OF GOOGLE SEARCH.
I ain't hating.... I'm just saying.... unless you're (speaking to the online therapist now) going to clearly state what.... ummmnnnn "school" you received all of your learnin' from.... you ain't no expert. Call yourself a motivational columnist instead. I might have actually taken the time to read your rant, but considering you started off with a big ole edumactionz lie (ASTHEBANNERACROSSYOURENTIREWEBSITE). I'll pass...... shoulda, woulda, coulda been honest.
Hey there, lookie loo, this here article was written by someone with a Master of Arts in Psychology!!!! That must meaan they know like, EVERYTHING.
But wait......
Has this article ever been peer reviewed?
NO
Are the person's credentials clearly stated?
NO
Additionally, I found some equally intrinsically unsound websites debunking her "education" and her theories..... I''d post them, but if you have half a brain cell and want to do your own research it comes up ON THE FIRST PAGE OF GOOGLE SEARCH.
I ain't hating.... I'm just saying.... unless you're (speaking to the online therapist now) going to clearly state what.... ummmnnnn "school" you received all of your learnin' from.... you ain't no expert. Call yourself a motivational columnist instead. I might have actually taken the time to read your rant, but considering you started off with a big ole edumactionz lie (ASTHEBANNERACROSSYOURENTIREWEBSITE). I'll pass...... shoulda, woulda, coulda been honest.
OH GOD....... THIS IS LIKE BEING HANDED A PRESENT STRAIGHT FROM GOD.........
Cut and pasted from the bottom of her article:
"I'm sorry if you've noticed any redundancies between this article, and a PDF file generated by BPDFamily.com. Blog site operator, 'Skip' of BPDFamily.com asked my permission in 2008 to amend/adapt this piece (AT ANY COST) for his site, and I refused him. All articles and other materials on my wellness site are totally original works, protected under copyright law. Skip ignored my non-consent for the use of this piece, and stole/reprinted words and phrases from it--which serve as ongoing reminders of his lack of honor and character. His subsequent efforts to malign me and devalue my written materials (since the 2008 incident) seem driven solely by vengeance. In every instance of discord between us, he has struck the first blow, and any claims he's made about me or my practice are completely unfounded/untrue."
Could it be she's throwing stones back at the website who throws stones at her? Hmmmnnnn...... sure sounds like two different websites we should spend, like, totally, ALL DAY reading and getting advice from. Sure 'nuff..... it don't smell dirty AT ALL.
Cut and pasted from the bottom of her article:
"I'm sorry if you've noticed any redundancies between this article, and a PDF file generated by BPDFamily.com. Blog site operator, 'Skip' of BPDFamily.com asked my permission in 2008 to amend/adapt this piece (AT ANY COST) for his site, and I refused him. All articles and other materials on my wellness site are totally original works, protected under copyright law. Skip ignored my non-consent for the use of this piece, and stole/reprinted words and phrases from it--which serve as ongoing reminders of his lack of honor and character. His subsequent efforts to malign me and devalue my written materials (since the 2008 incident) seem driven solely by vengeance. In every instance of discord between us, he has struck the first blow, and any claims he's made about me or my practice are completely unfounded/untrue."
Could it be she's throwing stones back at the website who throws stones at her? Hmmmnnnn...... sure sounds like two different websites we should spend, like, totally, ALL DAY reading and getting advice from. Sure 'nuff..... it don't smell dirty AT ALL.
Posted by cowpuncherPosted by GemsRaGalsBestPal
Considering I am like, totally an expert in like, EVERYTHING..... here's my take on this..... it went something like this....
Hey there, lookie loo, this here article was written by someone with a Master of Arts in Psychology!!!! That must meaan they know like, EVERYTHING.
But wait......
Has this article ever been peer reviewed?
NO
Are the person's credentials clearly stated?
NO
Additionally, I found some equally intrinsically unsound websites debunking her "education" and her theories..... I''d post them, but if you have half a brain cell and want to do your own research it comes up ON THE FIRST PAGE OF GOOGLE SEARCH.
I ain't hating.... I'm just saying.... unless you're (speaking to the online therapist now) going to clearly state what.... ummmnnnn "school" you received all of your learnin' from.... you ain't no expert. Call yourself a motivational columnist instead. I might have actually taken the time to read your rant, but considering you started off with a big ole edumactionz lie (ASTHEBANNERACROSSYOURENTIREWEBSITE). I'll pass...... shoulda, woulda, coulda been honest.
Yeah, sure, great. Meanwhile those of you gals who are getting snarky about that article have yet to produce "reliable" "pier reviewed" information for us to read, despite the topic starter's expressed desire to discuss this topic... which to me means he is LOOKING for additional information.
I wonder why it is several of you gals are up in arms about this, bashing that one article rather than putting forth a source that - in your opinion - is more reliable?
Maybe too much of it hits home?click to expand
http://www.lmgtfy.com/?q=% 22peer+reviewed% 22+% 22borderline+personality+disorder% 22+% 22scholarly+articles% 22/">Here, let me google that for you.....
BTW, I believe this is the part where the video game says..... PWN'd!!!!!!!!!! Or some shit like that. Basically, I'm saying..... I win.
Do I really need to explain to you why taking the diagnosis of a person who has not clearly stated their credentials is........ unhealthy? Oh shit..... shall we go through Psych 101 real quickly? Let me go find my syllabus......
Remember, I said if she called herself a motivational columnist I'd have no problem with her. But just like I won't go to the dude on the street corner that has needles for whatever reason and ask him to be my anesthesiologist, I'm also not taking the diagnosis of a self proclaimed psychology expert.....
Remember, I said if she called herself a motivational columnist I'd have no problem with her. But just like I won't go to the dude on the street corner that has needles for whatever reason and ask him to be my anesthesiologist, I'm also not taking the diagnosis of a self proclaimed psychology expert.....
And to answer your question, I am HIGHLY emotional and sensitive. I have never been diagosed with bpd or even bipolar, but I KNOW I exhibit very destructive characteristics. Especially in said relationship with Mr. Scorpio. We both nurtured the worst in each other for our own immediate gratification ... sigh ... Could you be looking for a reason as to why she acted the way she did, why she broke up with you? I can tell you that the energy between my ex and I was like poison, yet so addictive. And in that relationship, he sure acted nonchalant, while I was livid. He appeared to have no idea WHY I was upset or WHY I was hurt. I exhibit most of the bpd behaviors in some form, except suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior. My point is that my ex thinks I am a sociopath! My therapist says I'm not. 🙂
I'm not surprised by the reaction, people afflicted with BPD do nothing wrong and feel attacked at the slightest provocation with that being said there are some women and men with BPD that actually do acknowledge the symptoms and behavior and get help to find balance. I believe that article describes the worst kind of behavior in women with BPD. Cancer females and Cancer men are wow LOL
Posted by cowpuncher
sheisamazing:
Sorry to hear you had a painful breakup recently. Addiction and mental issues... that sounds like it was probably a pretty painful period in your life. Painful as a breakup may be, you are actually closer to happiness the second you are split from a bad partner than you ever were while you were with that partner.
Good luck to you, I hope you find the answers you are looking for.
Thanks so much! I really appreciate this.
Cow..... Puncher.....
Let's try this a different way....
Can you explain to me the purpose in peer reviewed articles?
Can you also explain the importance of attaching verifiable credentials to both the author and those who review the article?
Let's try this a different way....
Can you explain to me the purpose in peer reviewed articles?
Can you also explain the importance of attaching verifiable credentials to both the author and those who review the article?
Guess he told you LOL
"But just like I won't go to the dude on the street corner that has needles for whatever reason and ask him to be my anesthesiologist..." This was HILARIOUS!
Anyone who has been involved or had the opportunity to observe someone with BPD know first hand that some women and men with BPD exhibit the behaviors pointed out in that article, I personally felt the article was extreme because not all BPD afflicted people behave the way the article described and that should have been clarified instead of lumping all people who have BPD together in one box....That's my point.
Superior? Those are your words not mine...
Superior? Those are your words not mine...
I have my own personal opinions about (certain types) of cancers, don't worry about analyzing what I said to death but of course if that's what you wanna do then by all means.
Purrr I failed to mention...I'm an Aquarius
lol@blueribbons...you crack me up
Posted by cowpuncherPosted by GemsRaGalsBestPal
Cow..... Puncher.....
Let's try this a different way....
Can you explain to me the purpose in peer reviewed articles?
Can you also explain the importance of attaching verifiable credentials to both the author and those who review the article?
Madam, you are not the only person on earth who ever cracked a college textbook. You are also not the only one capable of some sarcasm, I assure you if you want to play that way, I am a match for you, should I decide to bother.
I know what peer review is, I know what credentials are. I also know that when someone adopts a sneering tone as though they are dispensing their wisdom from on-high... they probably don't have nearly so much wisdom to dispense as they think. It's all about attitude, and thus far yours doesn't impress me much. *shrug*
I've never seen someone who really knows what they are talking about on a subject come across with that attitude. Most real experts on any topic actually come across fairly humble, because they don't need to replace lack of confidence with a big mouth. I met Ian Moore once, one of the finest guitarists alive... down to earth, humble, friendly guy.. who just happens to have fingers that can work magic on a guitar. He's an expert at what he does.
How about you don't treat me like I'm stupid, and I won't treat you like you are too arrogant to hold a valid opinion? Again - If that info is inaccurate, show us something you have personally read that you find to be more accurate, so that we can do something pertinent to the topic here, rather than squabbling. Thanks. - CPclick to expand
I may not have been the only one to ever crack a textbook, but I will tell you this.... I am HIGHLY capable of sarcasm (please feel free to read any of my previous posts in other threads.... they're priceless.... to me at least and that's all that matters, oh, and my mom thinks I am funny). You wanna spar.... bring that shit on, but I suggest we enlist visual aids as you will quickly see they are some of my personal favorites.
Let's go ahead and restate my previous admonitions that I am not saying I am an expert BY ANY MEANS (per previous posts here in this thread you can rest assured I would post my credentials). Yes, I am an asshole. I like to be a pain in the as
Posted by cowpuncher
Yeah... sure ScorpioFish... the gals getting snarky here are absolutely right. Women *NEVER* have issues or cause problems in a relationship... your ex couldn't possibly have BPD. They know this because they know everything about your situation, they've walked in your shoes, studied your life carefully, and absolutely positively know for a rock solid fact that women NEVER have any problems, emotional instability, or disorders. Just ask 'em... they will be glad to tell ya! 😉
/sarcasm off.
Sorry gals, but there are good reasons why the words "emotional basket case" used together automatically conjure a feminine image in your mind first. Men can have issues... WOMEN can have issues too... knock off the criticism until you know what you are talking about in this situation, or alternatively just go start your own man-hating thread and watch some old episodes of Oprah or something. 🙂
Sorry but "emotional basket case" does not conjure a feminine image in my mind. Last I checked I dont hate men so... here is my two cents....Why is it that if a relationship doesn't work out or two people are not getting along, right away it MUST be a mental illness on the womens behalf, has anyone taken the time to think, hey maybe we are just not compatible for each other. Maybe I am not the one that brings the best out of this person. All I am hearing is about how she acted and lashed out negatively towards him. Well, what the hell did he do to her! If at any point she has been certified, which by his comment "she may suffer" states that she is not certified, why not try to be more understanding and help her out more by doing things that will help to not trigger the sypmtons of this "alleged disorder" that she supposedly has....Has he taken the time to consider that maybe the shit he was doing was driving her mad!!!! Maybe he should be more focused on researching his actions and the things he did wrong and try to find ways to adjust his behaviour rather then just looking up an article and claiming that the article is the diagnosis to his issues with her and the break up. He needs to research "How to cope with a break up." YOU should stop being biased just because both the women you decided to let in your life were MAYBE "certifiable" Mr. Jaded or maybe you should just go punch a cow..... haha!
CONT'D......
wouldn't want you taking anything personal and blaming it on the fact that you think I have BPD now..........lmfao!
and Thank you for you input cowpuncher or should I say Dr. Phil......HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GOOD TIMES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
wouldn't want you taking anything personal and blaming it on the fact that you think I have BPD now..........lmfao!
and Thank you for you input cowpuncher or should I say Dr. Phil......HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GOOD TIMES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mother Mary Whore Balls..... my previous posts got cut off and I was drinking too much..... water—? to notice......
Here's my point again dude - I love sweeping generalizations. They provide such a broad brush. So convenient.
Oh, oh yeah, aaaaaaand..... You're wrong. I'm right. "Nanny, nanny, boo, boo."
Whew, I feel so much better. Don't you?
Here's my point again dude - I love sweeping generalizations. They provide such a broad brush. So convenient.
Oh, oh yeah, aaaaaaand..... You're wrong. I'm right. "Nanny, nanny, boo, boo."
Whew, I feel so much better. Don't you?
Alright, fine. Let's talk for real....
Borderline Personality Disorder is manifested through fear of abandonment, intense anxiety and LOW self esteem. Put all that together and you get the woman on the floor on her hands and knees begging you to never leave her..... you don't get the vixen femme fatale. The BPD woman is not the one who swoops in, gets you all attached and then flies back out licking her chops and enjoying her spoils.
If you really want to read about heartless cold bitches like that..... look into antisocial personality disorder otherwise more commonly known as sociopaths.
Secondly, my problem with the article is as I stated the overgeneralization and the interjection of typical feelings and break up behavior for most relationships and attempting to label that as behavior caused by a disease. For instance:
"Borderlines can leave solid, long-term attachments/marriages very suddenly. You'll be feeling shocked and bewildered by this--particularly when she cites frustrations or problems you were never made aware of, to justify her abrupt departure. You might vacillate between numbness and tormenting confusion, but what's even worse, is she'll have you thinking you're responsible for this outcome! When you've done virtually everything to keep her satisfied and happy throughout this relationship (which has included putting your personal needs and desires aside to accommodate hers), you're left only with a sense of sheer exhaustion, painful craving and deep betrayal.
You cannot help agonizing over how she could leave--given all the times she told you this was the "best sex" she'd ever had, how much she needed you, and that she could never even imagine living without you! You've believed you were the center of her universe, and it was finally safe to let your guard down, and trust that she was here to stay. Losing a Borderline is like being in a hit-and-run accident. You're in trauma, and she speeds away without a moment's consideration for the carnage she's left behind. That's brutality!"
No, a BPD would not leave suddenly, nor is any of the rest that follows any different that any other break-up and the natural feelings one would have about that.
Borderline Personality Disorder is manifested through fear of abandonment, intense anxiety and LOW self esteem. Put all that together and you get the woman on the floor on her hands and knees begging you to never leave her..... you don't get the vixen femme fatale. The BPD woman is not the one who swoops in, gets you all attached and then flies back out licking her chops and enjoying her spoils.
If you really want to read about heartless cold bitches like that..... look into antisocial personality disorder otherwise more commonly known as sociopaths.
Secondly, my problem with the article is as I stated the overgeneralization and the interjection of typical feelings and break up behavior for most relationships and attempting to label that as behavior caused by a disease. For instance:
"Borderlines can leave solid, long-term attachments/marriages very suddenly. You'll be feeling shocked and bewildered by this--particularly when she cites frustrations or problems you were never made aware of, to justify her abrupt departure. You might vacillate between numbness and tormenting confusion, but what's even worse, is she'll have you thinking you're responsible for this outcome! When you've done virtually everything to keep her satisfied and happy throughout this relationship (which has included putting your personal needs and desires aside to accommodate hers), you're left only with a sense of sheer exhaustion, painful craving and deep betrayal.
You cannot help agonizing over how she could leave--given all the times she told you this was the "best sex" she'd ever had, how much she needed you, and that she could never even imagine living without you! You've believed you were the center of her universe, and it was finally safe to let your guard down, and trust that she was here to stay. Losing a Borderline is like being in a hit-and-run accident. You're in trauma, and she speeds away without a moment's consideration for the carnage she's left behind. That's brutality!"
No, a BPD would not leave suddenly, nor is any of the rest that follows any different that any other break-up and the natural feelings one would have about that.
Listen, if an emotionally charged article like this offers you soliace through a rough time, so be it. I am truly happy you've found something to help, but my problem enters when the author proposes to take a disorder and offer that up to you as the sole purpose (well that and your own disorder she states you must have to be attracted to a BPD woman) for the failed relationship..... I start seeing cross eyed.
Even worse is this is how people set themselves up to "fall down the rabbit hole". Next thing you know you're at a cocktail party and telling everyone about your new found knowledge about BPD. You're giving your buddies or your girlfriends advice and relating other peoples behavior to the definition of BPD you have in your mind. Bad info spreads, yet again.
This is why when I see a 4822863692746842910 word article talking about how BPD is the cause for the break up, when I see it is written biased and with sweeping generalizations, when I see hurting people looking to it to cling to something to make them feel better.... It is my natural inclination to question the integrity of the source. If it pans out, excellent. If not, read and enjoy it, but don't take it for gold.
Even worse is this is how people set themselves up to "fall down the rabbit hole". Next thing you know you're at a cocktail party and telling everyone about your new found knowledge about BPD. You're giving your buddies or your girlfriends advice and relating other peoples behavior to the definition of BPD you have in your mind. Bad info spreads, yet again.
This is why when I see a 4822863692746842910 word article talking about how BPD is the cause for the break up, when I see it is written biased and with sweeping generalizations, when I see hurting people looking to it to cling to something to make them feel better.... It is my natural inclination to question the integrity of the source. If it pans out, excellent. If not, read and enjoy it, but don't take it for gold.
Fwiw I cannot find where Scorpiofish (or anyone else for that matter) said this s/o left him suddenly, nor did Scorpiofish specify further what terms the separation was under. Also I don't think his intent was to villanize this woman, just to seek a way to move on and the search for an answer of why she left. I'm kinda confused how this got so off track tho lol.
I know, I just like to be a pain in the ass sometimes.....
Let's start with the formal definition of borderline personality disorder as provided by the DSM4 - DSM5 (the 5th version is headed out mid next year, but they release their revisions as they are made). The DSMwhatevernumber for those who may not know is the Psychology handbook. Consider it a combination of the encyclopedia and the dictionary to use for mapping, diagnosis and defining and classifying... etc, etc.
So formal definition per DSM5:
The essential features of a personality disorder are impairments in personality (self and interpersonal) functioning and the presence of pathological personality traits. To diagnose borderline personality disorder, the following criteria must be met:
A. Significant impairments in personality functioning manifest by:
1. Impairments in self functioning (a or b):
a. Identity: Markedly impoverished, poorly developed, or unstable self-image, often associated with excessive self-criticism; chronic feelings of emptiness; dissociative states under stress.
b. Self-direction: Instability in goals, aspirations, values, or career plans.
AND
2. Impairments in interpersonal functioning (a or b):
a. Empathy: Compromised ability to recognize the feelings and needs of others associated with interpersonal hypersensitivity (i.e., prone to feel slighted or insulted); perceptions of others selectively biased toward negative attributes or vulnerabilities.
b. Intimacy: Intense, unstable, and conflicted close relationships, marked by mistrust, neediness, and anxious preoccupation with real or imagined abandonment; close relationships often viewed in extremes of idealization and devaluation and alternating between over involvement and withdrawal.
cont....
Let's start with the formal definition of borderline personality disorder as provided by the DSM4 - DSM5 (the 5th version is headed out mid next year, but they release their revisions as they are made). The DSMwhatevernumber for those who may not know is the Psychology handbook. Consider it a combination of the encyclopedia and the dictionary to use for mapping, diagnosis and defining and classifying... etc, etc.
So formal definition per DSM5:
The essential features of a personality disorder are impairments in personality (self and interpersonal) functioning and the presence of pathological personality traits. To diagnose borderline personality disorder, the following criteria must be met:
A. Significant impairments in personality functioning manifest by:
1. Impairments in self functioning (a or b):
a. Identity: Markedly impoverished, poorly developed, or unstable self-image, often associated with excessive self-criticism; chronic feelings of emptiness; dissociative states under stress.
b. Self-direction: Instability in goals, aspirations, values, or career plans.
AND
2. Impairments in interpersonal functioning (a or b):
a. Empathy: Compromised ability to recognize the feelings and needs of others associated with interpersonal hypersensitivity (i.e., prone to feel slighted or insulted); perceptions of others selectively biased toward negative attributes or vulnerabilities.
b. Intimacy: Intense, unstable, and conflicted close relationships, marked by mistrust, neediness, and anxious preoccupation with real or imagined abandonment; close relationships often viewed in extremes of idealization and devaluation and alternating between over involvement and withdrawal.
cont....
B. Pathological personality traits in the following domains:
1. Negative Affectivity, characterized by:
a. Emotional lability: Unstable emotional experiences and frequent mood changes; emotions that are easily aroused, intense, and/or out of proportion to events and circumstances.
b. Anxiousness: Intense feelings of nervousness, tenseness, or panic, often in reaction to interpersonal stresses; worry about the negative effects of past unpleasant experiences and future negative possibilities; feeling fearful, apprehensive, or threatened by uncertainty; fears of falling apart or losing control.
c. Separation insecurity: Fears of rejection by — and/or separation from — significant others, associated with fears of excessive dependency and complete loss of autonomy.
d. Depressivity: Frequent feelings of being down, miserable, and/or hopeless; difficulty recovering from such moods; pessimism about the future; pervasive shame; feeling of inferior self-worth; thoughts of suicide and suicidal behavior.
2. Disinhibition, characterized by:
a. Impulsivity: Acting on the spur of the moment in response to immediate stimuli; acting on a momentary basis without a plan or consideration of outcomes; difficulty establishing or following plans; a sense of urgency and self-harming behavior under emotional distress.
b. Risk taking: Engagement in dangerous, risky, and potentially self-damaging activities, unnecessarily and without regard to consequences; lack of concern for one's limitations and denial of the reality of personal danger.
3. Antagonism, characterized by:
a. Hostility: Persistent or frequent angry feelings; anger or irritability in response to minor slights and insults.
C. The impairments in personality functioning and the individual??s personality trait expression are relatively stable across time and consistent across situations.
D. The impairments in personality functioning and the individual??s personality trait expression are not better understood as normative for the individual??s developmental stage or socio-cultural environment.
E. The impairments in personality functioning and the individual??s personality trait expression are not solely due to the direct physiological effects of a substance (e.g., a drug of abuse, medication) or a general medical condition (e.g., severe head trauma).
1. Negative Affectivity, characterized by:
a. Emotional lability: Unstable emotional experiences and frequent mood changes; emotions that are easily aroused, intense, and/or out of proportion to events and circumstances.
b. Anxiousness: Intense feelings of nervousness, tenseness, or panic, often in reaction to interpersonal stresses; worry about the negative effects of past unpleasant experiences and future negative possibilities; feeling fearful, apprehensive, or threatened by uncertainty; fears of falling apart or losing control.
c. Separation insecurity: Fears of rejection by — and/or separation from — significant others, associated with fears of excessive dependency and complete loss of autonomy.
d. Depressivity: Frequent feelings of being down, miserable, and/or hopeless; difficulty recovering from such moods; pessimism about the future; pervasive shame; feeling of inferior self-worth; thoughts of suicide and suicidal behavior.
2. Disinhibition, characterized by:
a. Impulsivity: Acting on the spur of the moment in response to immediate stimuli; acting on a momentary basis without a plan or consideration of outcomes; difficulty establishing or following plans; a sense of urgency and self-harming behavior under emotional distress.
b. Risk taking: Engagement in dangerous, risky, and potentially self-damaging activities, unnecessarily and without regard to consequences; lack of concern for one's limitations and denial of the reality of personal danger.
3. Antagonism, characterized by:
a. Hostility: Persistent or frequent angry feelings; anger or irritability in response to minor slights and insults.
C. The impairments in personality functioning and the individual??s personality trait expression are relatively stable across time and consistent across situations.
D. The impairments in personality functioning and the individual??s personality trait expression are not better understood as normative for the individual??s developmental stage or socio-cultural environment.
E. The impairments in personality functioning and the individual??s personality trait expression are not solely due to the direct physiological effects of a substance (e.g., a drug of abuse, medication) or a general medical condition (e.g., severe head trauma).
Posted by celebration
Fwiw I cannot find where Scorpiofish (or anyone else for that matter) said this s/o left him suddenly, nor did Scorpiofish specify further what terms the separation was under. Also I don't think his intent was to villanize this woman, just to seek a way to move on and the search for an answer of why she left. I'm kinda confused how this got so off track tho lol.
The quote about being left suddenly is from the article itself. I am by no means putting scorpfish under attack, only the integrity of the article itself.
Posted by cowpuncher
From another article on that site, concerning BP😱
"If you persistently expect your relative, lover or friend to intuit your feelings and needs, you may have Borderline Personality Disorder traits."
Any and all Ladies reading this who were born after 1950 or so: Go to the chalkboard and write that sentence about 10,000,000,000,001 times. Thank you. - CP
dont you remember what you type......so this solves my MUST point....
to be cont'd....
Oh ok. Well I mean I appreciate the list you posted for us. Idk I mean I'm no medical journalist, blogger, nor do I even work in the medical field NOR even the counselling field. From an intuitive person's standpoint, it seems we are now discussing minutia and bantering. Whats the deal can't we get along? Or no... probably not huh.
So when is they guy who started this thread coming back? lol
To answer your other question, I have not identifiably dealt with someone with BPD in my life. Have I had failed relationships? Absolutely, I'm alive. I'm breathing. Therefore, I'm included in the running for Biggest Broken Heart 2011.
Here's another thing to consider...... over diagnosing people with mental disorders leads to the increased oppression of the health industry in general. There are a lot of things that I agree with, but there are also some that just make my skin friggen crawl. For instance, we now have the brand spaking new "hypersexuality disorder".... translation? Tiger and Arnold can't keep it in their pants soooooo...... let's make it a disorder and make new drugs to control it!!!!!
Here's another thing to consider...... over diagnosing people with mental disorders leads to the increased oppression of the health industry in general. There are a lot of things that I agree with, but there are also some that just make my skin friggen crawl. For instance, we now have the brand spaking new "hypersexuality disorder".... translation? Tiger and Arnold can't keep it in their pants soooooo...... let's make it a disorder and make new drugs to control it!!!!!
Posted by cowpuncherPosted by Sagittarius89
So when is they guy who started this thread coming back? lol
No kidding.. that's what I'm starting to wonder lol
Sag89, you said you have this condition? Could you talk about it, how it affects you... what you know about it... etc? If it's too personal or painful don't worry about it, but your insight could be pretty interesting and informative.click to expand
Sure, what would you like to know?
Posted by cowpuncherPosted by CrabbyTwins
CONT'D......
wouldn't want you taking anything personal and blaming it on the fact that you think I have BPD now..........lmfao!
and Thank you for you input cowpuncher or should I say Dr. Phil......HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GOOD TIMES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Nobody said it "MUST" be the woman's fault every time. Why "must" you put words in other people's mouths, particularly when you are almost entirely clueless about the experience they are talking about? You weren't there. How is it that you know so much about those situations then... you psychic? Omnicscient? Just curious.
I have no idea if you have BPD or not. I do wish you would let adults have a discussion like adults though 🙂
Btw, I actually find Dr. Phil to be very annoying... all it takes to get me to turn the channel is for him to come on the screen for a sec. What I don't do though is sit there and trash the guy and disrupt his show with my big mouth 🙂 Grownups can change the channel, or just read and comment on a different thread, or start their own, if they don't want to discuss the topic and information relevant to it.click to expand
Therefore you put the words there yourself......and so now I am clueless and not an adult because you said so.....interesting....from what I have read, you weren't there yourself, so how is it that you know, because you claim to have slept with women you alleged had bpd.....interesting....and no I'm not psychic or omniscient, if your that curious, it's called READING........
The way you find doctor Phil annoying is the way I find your comments and statements annoying, hence the reason I felt obliged to compare you to him. Hypocritical, your big mouth trashed this thread a long time ago making it about you when it's really not......(if you need me to show you how let me know)Seems like your the GROWNUP that still has a lot of growing up to do because I dont think you have a clue as to what "grownups" are "supposed" to do..... Grown ups live by their own standards last time I checked! BTW I did discus the topic at hand or is your reading comprehension not up to par old man. This is DXP, seriously, I comment on any thread I want as a "grown up."
CONT'D
Maybe you should take your own advice and take a hike! I can see why your other relationships didn't last, and your blaming them.....get a grip pops!!!!!
Maybe you should take your own advice and take a hike! I can see why your other relationships didn't last, and your blaming them.....get a grip pops!!!!!
Cowpuncher,
why don't you look the shit up yourself......since you are so desperate to learn something new....
why don't you look the shit up yourself......since you are so desperate to learn something new....
Posted by Sagittarius89
So when is they guy who started this thread coming back? lol
when cowpuncher stops making it about him..
Posted by cowpuncherPosted by CrabbyTwinsPosted by cowpuncher
From another article on that site, concerning BP😱
"If you persistently expect your relative, lover or friend to intuit your feelings and needs, you may have Borderline Personality Disorder traits."
Any and all Ladies reading this who were born after 1950 or so: Go to the chalkboard and write that sentence about 10,000,000,000,001 times. Thank you. - CP
dont you remember what you type......so this solves my MUST point....
to be cont'd....
Okay Crabby... you next:
How many times have you heard men lamenting that they are expected to play a guessing game, or read their significant other's mind, to intuit her needs? That does happen, a lot. Quite a few guys out there ignore obvious clues their gal drops on them... but just as many women expect their guy to suddenly telepathically sense and understand their every last little want and need. You know that's a fact.
As for me posting that quote and saying that... are you really the only one ever allowed to engage in a little sarcasm?click to expand
agreed and no I'm not!
Everyone... separate.
*points at you* You in that corner!
*points at you* You in this corner!
TIME OUT CHILDREN
*points at you* You in that corner!
*points at you* You in this corner!
TIME OUT CHILDREN
Whew I gotta go do something all this fighting is stressing me out. Good grief, perscribed chill pills aren't so bad lookin at this point.
LMAO! Capricorns are funny...
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