Friendship...PIsces/Cancer

I am a Pisces and for whatever reason I have always had a hard time getting along with Cancers...better yet, I have a hard time liking them...

I have a very good friend who is a Cancer...she considers me her best friend...and although I love her...I find it hard to always love who she is...the best way to describe her is selfish...she has very little friends and over the past 10 years that I have known her I have watched several of her relationships fall apart in every aspect of her life...broken engagement, horrible nasty fights with her sisters and other family members...and she's lost some pretty great friends...but I never held any of those things against her...I've loved her unconditionally and offered her a wonderful friendship...and although I know she loves me I think she can't help but be who she is...she can be extremely nasty...but can always admit to her downfalls, which is her best quality...she is not defensive and is very honest...

My problem is...I am not sure it's the healthiest friendship for me...she complains about EVERYTHING...and when we are out in public she always makes some comment or behaves in a way that isn't very nice towards me...which always makes me question how sincere her love is...

To give an example, because I don't think I am being very clear...on Saturday we had a friend's birthday...she got stuck sitting in the middle and didn't really have anyone to talk to...I sat at the opposite end and mingled with the people in my section...I constantly turned to make sure my friend was okay...and at one point, she gave me a pretty dirty look which left me confused...I gave her a look to show my confusion and continued to mingle and never paid her any mind for the rest of dinner...later on we talked for a bit and then I moved away to wait for my husband...I turned and as she was talking to someone, again she rolls her eyes at me...at this point, I ignored her...I planned on enjoying my evening...

and then the next day she texts me as if nothing...sends me emails...texts me...calls me...over the phone we are great...and one on one we are fine...but every time we are in a group setting she feels the need to do something that upsets me...and I am kind of over it...

Are Cancers like this— Is her behavior harmless and I am just being sensitive—

I'm a Cancer and I had a Cancer friend very similar to that once, not all Cancers are like that. Like you, my friend destroyed every single friendship she's ever had, it made me seasick how often she wasnt talking to someone and vice versa. Eventually she did the same thing to me, she allowed her loser boyfriend to trash talk a mutual friend of ours, he said some awful things to her. From then on I quit talking to her, then later on I found out that she had told a friend of mine's husband something that I had said about his wife in anger a long time ago. I could never trust her again after that.

I forgive her for being the person that she is, but I don't need that kind of person in my life. My life got better once she was out of it! You don't need that kind of stress...the people in your life should bring you joy and if they don't then it's time to move on.

CC what made you find a thread from 2011?? lol. I find that odd

Since im here, NO, not all Cancers treat their friends like crap. Yes some of us can be emotional & sensitive where we may need a day alone for ourselves to recharge. But the good Cancers are very loyal & friends are almost like family. The ones who do treat their friends like shyt, don't deserve them & those Cancers got some serious issues that only they can fix. Well my answer here is for anyone confused about their Cancer friend.

Posted by CluelessCancer
Ya i'm like that, i drop my friends quickly and regret it years later, when i'm alone.

cancer women in the end (well atleast me) are loners...people don't satisfy us..they don't meet our expectations...

I've had these same experiences myself. I am a loner. I think the hard part in being friends with Cancer women is dealing with our moodiness. We can act very irrational when we're upset. We can torch friendships and regret it years later. Of course that's not all Cancers but I can relate to what CC is saying and admire her honesty. As for your situation, if you're sitting in this much judgement of your Cancer friend, and I can't say as I blame you, this is a sign that you need to pull back from the friendship at a minimum. Maybe it has run its course? A Cancer woman who can't get a hold of her emotions is no fun to be around and a real drag. Guess it's a good thing, I'm basically a loner. I do have a few close girlfriends but I really like and need my space & downtime. Good luck with this & be true to yourself. Pisces can be very very hard on themselves. Don't you be!

Very much a loner and I have cut off friendships or just stopped communicating with people.
I think we are just very very sensitive people and it takes a very intuitive, gentle, loving, yet strong person to maintain a long-term anything with us.

That person has to be VERY loyal, protective, assertive and trustworthy.

@CC Ohh ok, well that OP needs to drop that Cancer friend, because she doesn't sound like a good trustworthy friend at all. Her behavior is inexcusable. I hope this Pisces lady did. She deserves better friends than that

Posted by CluelessCancer

Posted by LunarMaiden
Very much a loner and I have cut off friendships or just stopped communicating with people.
I think we are just very very sensitive people and it takes a very intuitive, gentle, loving, yet strong person to maintain a long-term anything with us.

For me it takes loyalty and honesty. If i notice shadiness of any type, even a tinge, my being isn't able to process it and i'm out...

but people are people nobody is perfect....thats my cross to bear

click to expand

Yes loyalty is a major factor, if I don't trust you; you don't hear much from me.

I have my bad days true enough, but that's when i really need my friends the most. But for me to just stop talking to them for no reason at all, I don't see or picture myself doing that to someone i care for. I agree on liking veryy assertive people, but as long as they sweet. Good thing im intuitive & pick up on peoples feelings & emotions sometimes

@CC You are right, but talking can only go so far. If there's no action behind those words, it's pointless. But hopefully, that Cancer lady can clean up her act. Cancers can be great friends if they got they head on straight lol

I agree @LunarMaiden... I too keep a distance with my heart and people who call themselves or want to be my friend. I find solace in solitude. Mostly all of my real friends are older than me and have active lives of their own. We chat about once or twice a week and meet up about once a month. I am a very moody person so my true friends (who are all earth signs) know how to deal with me in that manner. I have two children so they are my world. I give them 100% of my time. Everyone else is secondary.

Same fuckin here. I have some friends but i prefer to move at my own speed. i'm very social but cant say i'd be friends with you to hang out all the time,nah not me. Once i sense dishonesty dont come near me. FIRE bun bad mind people.

The scorch has spoken

Posted by sonofthunder
I'd like to distance myself from every Cancer I know..

Nothin' but trouble.

If you would just untuck your penis from between your legs, you might have better results with Crabs.
La Fin

Claro - I've tried talking to her on several occasions. I've been beyond loving and patient with her, because I can see through the fluff and focus on her good. Unfortunately, although she tells me how much she loves me, that I'm her best friend, etc., she takes my friendship for granted. She literally has two friends, and the other mutual friend is not interested in being as close to her as I am. Yet, my Cancer friend tip toes around her to make sure they always remain strong, but she's not as careful with me. She loves me, but I think she just can't handle being my friend. She tends to like people who aren't doing as well as she is. She's unhappy and can't seem to bear any happiness in my life. On Saturday, the 3 of us got together and our friend who's been trying to have a baby for quite some time announced she was pregnant. She's been in quite a depression for a while over it, so we're all besides ourselves for her. The Cancer jumped up and down, etc. Later on, I announced my promotion (clearly not as exciting, or important...but definitely something I've been waiting on for some time). As soon I told the Cancer, she stared at me, said finally in not the friendliest of tones, and made no other mention of it again. The comment "finally" alone was a bit uncalled for, but I could have moved on from it had she shown more interest. I literally drove out an hour to make sure her birthday was celebrated that night, and she couldn't muster enough interest in something of value for me. The whole friendship just feels incredibly one-sided. I have a ton of friends and she reaps that benefit. She's lost more friends over the years than anyone else I have ever known. She treats her husband and family like garbage. The writing is on the wall, I just have a hard time walking away from things because I always hold on to the hope that things can change. I tend to cling to the potential of what something can be, instead of what's actually there.

Good point...she just has the habit of not being the most thrilled when good things happen for other people...

Aries are pretty upfront so there is no guessing with them or their intentions as friends.

While I think Cancer's are the most unstable emotionally of the zodiac I firmly believe that most Pisces people really don't care about people's feelings beside their own. They want people to think they care as it enables them to fly under the radar, but Pisces are like the best conartists of the zodiac, they can appear to be anything they want and they like it that way.

I know two good friends who married Pisces women and I feel like they deep down regretted it because Pisces women while considered the most feminine will lie and misdirect until they get what they want and will discredit anyone that gets in their way convincingly. Both of these women made massive 360 changes once they got married and basically morphed into people they never showed any inkling of being beforehand. I feel a Cancer is pretty consistent to what they always were, even after marriage. Pisces at their core have strengths but they want people to clean up their messes and go about their lives unchecked.

Piscesis super resilient and even if they have a logical moon such as Virgo their Pisces nature will always dominate in the end.

HighTide...I can see what you mean...I happen to know a lot of Pisces...and they do come across as a bit fake...I was raised by an Aries...so I tend to take the upfront approach...and I like to give without expecting...I guess the only thing I do expect, is to be treated fairly...you know, the whole treat people the way you want to be treated bit...other than that, I have a Cancer Rising and Aquarius Moon...so I'm emotionally cool...if that makes sense...not really extreme on either end...Pisces are chameleons...but all of the Cancers I've met are selfish...and will hurt someone else just to protect their own deep rooted insecurities...so I'll take being a Pisces...

Posted by sonofthunder
I'd like to distance myself from every Cancer I know..

Nothin' but trouble.

I shut down at any sign of disloyalty. Can't get around it.

I shut down around self-centered people.

Says the Pisces in the Cancer forum.

Posted by Angel1177
HighTide...I can see what you mean...I happen to know a lot of Pisces...and they do come across as a bit fake...I was raised by an Aries...so I tend to take the upfront approach...and I like to give without expecting...I guess the only thing I do expect, is to be treated fairly...you know, the whole treat people the way you want to be treated bit...other than that, I have a Cancer Rising and Aquarius Moon...so I'm emotionally cool...if that makes sense...not really extreme on either end...Pisces are chameleons...but all of the Cancers I've met are selfish...and will hurt someone else just to protect their own deep rooted insecurities...so I'll take being a Pisces...

Cancers and Pisces both feed off other signs emotionally because we both are the most vulnerable to crash and burn the worst when things go bad. So naturally Cancer has a mechanism of give and take to ensure we some sort of backup plan in place.Pisces doesn't do that per-say but they use other methods to get what they want over time. The Pisces method actually allows you to go with the flow and not sweat the small things but each and every time it leave you will -0 dollars in your pocket at the end of the endevour while the Cancer has the last 100 bucks to get you both back to civilization.

The biggest difference however is that being at the bottom for a Pisces usually can be a spiritual/enlightening experience that they cling onto a little too long while for a Cancer it is extremely uncomfortable situation to be in. The biggest arguments between the two signs occur when Cancer starts pushing Pisces to make a move when they aren't ready. Fundamentally Cancer's protective nature is just trying to protect the Pisces from the shit fixing to hit the fan but it comes across as controlling which I can see how it does.....

I have a Cancer Sun and Pisces Moon so I feel I am able to see where the motivation comes from. The Pisces way is actually a more enjoyable life as long as there is money behind it. Otherwise those Taurus bankers will hit a foreclosed sign on a Pisces faster than your head can spin when your behind on payments and set you back to reality when you might not be emotionally ready. Cancer's just know how cruel other "less crazy" signs can be when they want their money. Cancers are doing their own damage control to protect the Pisces dreamworld.

Posted by HighTide
Aries are pretty upfront so there is no guessing with them or their intentions as friends.

While I think Cancer's are the most unstable emotionally of the zodiac I firmly believe that most Pisces people really don't care about people's feelings beside their own. They want people to think they care as it enables them to fly under the radar, but Pisces are like the best conartists of the zodiac, they can appear to be anything they want and they like it that way.

I know two good friends who married Pisces women and I feel like they deep down regretted it because Pisces women while considered the most feminine will lie and misdirect until they get what they want and will discredit anyone that gets in their way convincingly. Both of these women made massive 360 changes once they got married and basically morphed into people they never showed any inkling of being beforehand. I feel a Cancer is pretty consistent to what they always were, even after marriage. Pisces at their core have strengths but they want people to clean up their messes and go about their lives unchecked.

Piscesis super resilient and even if they have a logical moon such as Virgo their Pisces nature will always dominate in the end.

I don't think this is true for all Pisceans.
But this definitely sounds like my cousin's wife.
He's a Capricorn and she's a Pisces.

She sensed that he was 'traditional' and needed constant reassurance or an ego boost. He was with his girlfriend of 4 years at the time (A Libra). She befriended this woman and manipulated her way into the picture. She gave off a very feminine, traditional vibe. My cousin was having some doubts and insecurities about his Libra at the time. He gravitated towards this Pisces, and slept with her. She played the feminine role until she became pregnant and the Libra was out of the picture. They are now married.

He's miserable....and stressed out. He carries all the responsibilities in the house.

This Pisces woman refused to do anything. She's emotionally weak, and nags about needing constant attention. She works sporadically, never cooks or cleans, refused to drive anywhere, and allows him to bring home the entire bacon, and play the domestic role for their kids.

Total 360. LOL.

yea me & a cancer was best friends for 20+ years, and it finally came to an end this year..

i came to the realization that we're just going in two different directions in life..my fiancee saw what i didn't want to believe years ago thou..which was me just being his crutch instead of a real friend..he started to only come around when he was in need & that will be a death sentence for any friendship

grown men shouldn't have to always depend or lean on a friend the way he did..hopefully he'll get his life in order because regardless of how i feel about him now i still wish the best for'em