@scorpio-gal
19 Years
Sigh - Blown It - Sigh
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I've blown it with cap but I feel sort of free at the same time, I wasn't being true to myself and who i really am and I just couldn't go on pretending I was happy being friends because every bit of me ached to be held and loved like I was in the first 2 weeks but it was never going to be. I've only known him 2 months in total. Typical eh—
This board saved my sanity many cold, lonely nights I can tell you I've been lurking for a while and felt now was the right time to "come out" as it were. I feel empty, I know he was playing for time this evening but I said that I can't be friends on your terms anymore it's too hard. So it is. I want the first two weeks guy back, I don't want this new person who I can't read anymore.
Why do they take a blossoming, blooming love and trash it— He was my first cap and I can assure you he'll be my last lol I can laugh now but will I be laughing in the morning?? Hopefully I will. There aren't many details here they'll come later when I'm less obsessed lol dammit I thought he was my soulmate!!! Those eyes and that smile.