Sharing personal information

In a dating scenario, how do you feel when someone shares something with others that you've confided in them about?

I mean like really personal things, like memories of things that have affected your whole life and the way you feel about the world around you. Specifically, bad things that have happened to you that you have barely breathed a word of to anyone.

How do you feel and what do you think of that person moving forward?

Entirely online? Don't really care as long as true identity is withheld.

Among family and friends offline? Death sentence.

I would feel exposed and like my trust is broken. Would be the end of that.

I don't really have any deep secrets like that.

So I wouldn't care too much.

We are all human and we all do human things.

However, if the person is talking about me in a bad and gossipy way, and I find that out, then it's over. You know , if he is a bad guy that degrades women's bodies, or calls women names, stuff like that.

I think I don't care too much about other things because my mom wanted everything to be a secret and stressed over it so much and felt shame over everything and wanted to create this perfect image of her so noone could gossip about her that I reached a point of realizing, does it even matter? Being transparent is less stress and more healthy for you 😄

It could be quite bothersome to me if they actually mention my name or my specifics but it is gonna be okay if they shared it in anonymity to both other ppl I know of or to strangers.

If they mention me specifically then I would be mostly disappointed and not going to let myself to share anything with them anymore or limit my interactions with them.

Bad things that happened to me that I haven’t told anyone else? I would call them out on it and ask the context in which they shared it. Can usually tell from how they react if it was malicious or not. Go from there.

i don't trust men that are seemingly 'too open' and who label themselves as a very milquetoast person.

they're usually the most manipulative.

Nah, some intimate things - are for private ears only. Divulging that - implies a breach of trust, which i might find/deem unforgivable.

Posted by Polyannanana
I don't really have any deep secrets like that.

So I wouldn't care too much.

We are all human and we all do human things.

However, if the person is talking about me in a bad and gossipy way, and I find that out, then it's over. You know , if he is a bad guy that degrades women's bodies, or calls women names, stuff like that.

I think I don't care too much about other things because my mom wanted everything to be a secret and stressed over it so much and felt shame over everything and wanted to create this perfect image of her so noone could gossip about her that I reached a point of realizing, does it even matter? Being transparent is less stress and more healthy for you 😄

Mocking women and putting them down is a huge red flag to me, even mocking people in general I feel, especially when it's a regular, every-day thing.

Honestly, I'm a very private person, that's just the way I am. I may tell a couple of my closest friends some personal things and that's it really. But I tend stay away from people who generally gossip about and degrade others. I just don't like unfriendly environments or trust people who do that.

Posted by Whynn
It could be quite bothersome to me if they actually mention my name or my specifics but it is gonna be okay if they shared it in anonymity to both other ppl I know of or to strangers.

If they mention me specifically then I would be mostly disappointed and not going to let myself to share anything with them anymore or limit my interactions with them.

Trust afterwards would be very difficult, if almost impossible, I see this too.

Posted by PilatesBod
Bad things that happened to me that I haven’t told anyone else? I would call them out on it and ask the context in which they shared it. Can usually tell from how they react if it was malicious or not. Go from there.

The context always matters doesn't it. If you're really close with this person and they genuinely didn't mean any harm and/ or had no malicious intentions then it might be worth speaking with them and trying to help them fix whatever it was that had them feel they had to do it in the first place. That's if they mean something to you.

Posted by virgoOPPP
i don't trust men that are seemingly 'too open' and who label themselves as a very milquetoast person.

they're usually the most manipulative.

It's interesting how you brought someone who might do this and this type of man together into the same context. Have you known a few people in such a way?

Milquetoast, I've never heard of this word before. Milk toast. (:

☠️Snitches get stitches☠️

… that how I feel about it.

The size of the stitch depends on the context and manner in which it was done, of course😮‍💨😮‍💨.

To me it's obviously inappropriate. Shouldn't even be questioned imo. But then again I usually need to hold the power in relationships.

Posted by FuelAirPropellant
To me it's obviously inappropriate. Shouldn't even be questioned imo. But then again I usually need to hold the power in relationships.

This is what I've always maintained. It's idealistic, isn't it.