Burning question

This is something I often wonder, but can never seem to understand. A friend of mine is currently in a similar situation. First a few questions to narrow it down. What is treating yourself well and with respect? What does it mean to surround yourself with people that you love? Must you surround yourself with these kinds of people in order to be considered a person who treats themselves well and with respect? Must these people necessarily treat you the same way that you treat yourself, or that you treat them? As some people on here know, there are people that I like and have liked in the past, that I care about, that treat me poorly. But I feel like they treat me that way because they need to feel better about themselves, and I, not wanting them to feel bad about themselves, feel like this is okay. But is it really?

wait, so...can i just answer the last question? because if so, then i have to say, "no it is not."

Right, okay. So, but it is okay to say, okay, something is wrong with this person, and they're treating me this way because they feel like they need to, even if maybe they're not even aware of it. And then it's easier to not be offended by it, because you know that it isn't personal. But what you should tell is let them know that you understand that, and that they don't need to treat you that way, right?

notso, this one's a little iffy.

banini...that could make you look like a fool. however i find it very cute and sincere, but some people might not feel that way. i know what you're getting at, but i think it's impossible to sustain a relationship like that. you can only take negativity for so long, and you can't make people change.

Yes, and I believe I made myself look like quite a fool. I didn't really understand what was going on, so I just kind of went along for the ride. It hurt and stuff, but I figured I would learn something from it, and I did. I don't want to make anyone change, I just want to let them know that I think they should, and that they can.