He said he liked me a lot...

...does he really mean this? This is the first real admission of interest. At first, he said he was attracted, now it's moved to this...I'm a scorpio female, by the way, and I'm just curious...can any Libras help me out?

libras are not inclined to say things like that unless they mean it.

oh, and when a libra says they like someone a lot, it's usually a massive understatement. we're not good with feelings.

Scorpio & Libra eh... Well I'm sure he likes ya.. & I agree with curious visitor.

what does that mean, "massive understatement"? I have read so many threads on here about libra men and their ways. Just want to know what to expect because he has disappeared on me, as I knew that would happen sooner than later...I'm not stressing him though. I'm just kinda biding my time and getting things done...wonder if he's going to come back around?

Posted by Scorpiana
what does that mean, "massive understatement"? I have read so many threads on here about libra men and their ways. Just want to know what to expect because he has disappeared on me, as I knew that would happen sooner than later...I'm not stressing him though. I'm just kinda biding my time and getting things done...wonder if he's going to come back around?

as in, a libra doesn't say they like you unless they're actually madly in love with you. it's rare that a libra will come right out and say what they feel, they usually will pretend that what they feel is much less intense than the reality.

but then, i guess it depends on how he said it. did he say "i like you a lot, but i don't want to be with you". or did he say "i like you a lot" then tilt his head to the side and get a goofy little grin on his face? the first means he's not interested. the second means he's in love.

Well, he text me that after he left my house for a visit. We didn't do anything but watch a couple of movies, talk about some of his issues, and laugh. Then, later that day I got this exact text: I want you to know that I like you a lot. I was like wow. And since then, he's been over again and we text throughout the day, pretty general stuff. Seems like he always wants to know what I am doing...but, I'm keeping it cool, not stressing him about anything, even though I want to practically jump his bones whenever I see him! But, for a libra male, I know they are flighty, but it seems like he's genuinely interested...I don't know how to read this guy.. I don't want to come out and ask, but I'm afraid I'm going to have a heart-attack if I don't do something or know something...any insight? Ask all the questions you need to, people...lol..

@ curious visitior: no, he never said that he never wanted to be with me. In fact, he keeps telling me that his ex wants him back and he keeps having to tell her that they are not getting back together and to not think that they are. I think he's serious, but then again, he's a libra...

yeah, okay then. so he's probably in love already. libras fall pretty quickly, but they usually stick to a timeline when it comes to acting on those feelings as much, lest things not work out. but yeah, he definitely does like you. i wouldn't worry too much about scaring him away. libras only get scared away when they aren't sure of a person (or, in reality, aren't willing to admit to themselves they just aren't into a person). plus, if you're a scorpio, you've probably got too much dignity to go chasing after him like a fool.

@ curious visitor: wow. i am about to explode! what is the best way to approach him to let him know that i want to be intimate with him? we have before, but he is so nice and i dont want to be too forthcoming and turn him off. or, how can i get him to approach me? i want more than this and i know i have to exercise patience, but i really want to kno...

So, I have to give up my dog. I told him about it and I was all crying and stuff (we are texting). All he could say was that sucked. I heard no more from him. Is this typical? Did I over do it with all the emotional stuff? I mean, he didnt see me cry, I just told him I was...

libras aren't very good with emotion, we don't usually have much to say, and usually it ends up sounding kinda cold. but that's a pretty shitty thing for him to do.

i'm not sure why he did that though (there's several possible reasons), so i have no idea what you should do.

i'd consider this...do you want to be involved with someone who disappears if you get emotional? do you want to have to censor yourself to keep someone around? because you shouldn't. so maybe he's not right for you.

What else was he suppose to say. Wow. That really sucks. I'm really sorry to hear that. Is pretty much all I would say.

From my scorp friends that have dated libra men, they don't understand this type of response. It eventually leaves them feeling misunderstood, unloved and insecure. I don't think he will be able to reach you at the level you want. Just my opinion.

Yeah @curious & sparrow: I see what you both are saying, but its me. I know it is. He is doing his own thing, going his own way and at the time, I had a lot of time on my hands. Not the case anymore. I haven't heard from him since Saturday (which, btw we hung out and ate and looked at some stuff...he asked if I would come), but it's ok. I understand how they move a little more than I did. I'm just glad to get some kind of insight into how he does things, just so that I don't freak out or think he has changed his mind about me, or whatever...Libras are scary, lol. You think Scorpios are unpredictable, whew! I'll have to give that award to Libra males, for sure...

I just wonder that if he is spending time with me, if things will eventually go further? I hope so. But in the meantime, I'm content with being his friend. At least I have him in my life in some capacity.

Scorpiana this is a very serious question.

Why do you assume that there is something wrong with you? aka "I see what you are both saying but it is me. I know it is." Could it be possible that he just isn't giving you what you need to feel safe, secure, and loved?

The problem is you are feeling a little angst. This should be a sign that something just isn't right for you but instead you are trying to force yourself to be comfortable and accept the situation despite that little angsty alarm bell in the back of your head.

FWIW, Hollywood lied. Good relationships are not angsty, anxiety riddled highs and lows, with passionate steamy blows of emotion. They are when you feel secure, happy, because your partner is reliable and does exactly what they say they will and you can trust them to want the best for you. It is when you are with the person because you WANT to be and choose to be, not because you need to be. Definetly not that exciting, but stable and comforting and lasting.

So maybe it isn't just you. Maybe it isn't him either. Maybe it is just the combination of the two of you together. If you are feeling anxiety and longing, ask yourself if this is the type of love you really want.

Just some thoughts.

@ L_S: Wow. How awesome you are. Thanks for that. But, when I said it was just me, I kinda meant that I was the one emotionally off and that that is the way he is, I guess (hope that made sense). I'm pretty confident in myself and my abilities with the opposite sex, but this man is really bugging me. I don't usually fall for the "Hollywood Life". I know it's all an illusion, but a part of me feels like this can work. A little backstory: He has a situation with an ex and we are just friends. He has expressed his like-ness for me, but that is about it. I really can't take this man seriously until his situation is fixed. (I can fill you in privately)...
but I am just so confused by him! We def get along great (he has even said so). And I know we would work. I just want some insight into this thing we have and him, so I won't get deep into him and end up contemplating jumping off of something in a movie-type way, lol. Nah, not that serious, but I would like to get a lil bit of understanding to at least be in control of what may happen. Im a scorpio, for pete's sake. Even if he switches his attitude from what he is feeling now, at least I will know it was coming! And I will be less hurt by it. He really is a nice guy...from what I've seen so far...

Plus, he said that he wasn't going to just jump into something right away...I took it for what it was, but then he hit me with "I just want you to know I like you a lot"...what the fuzz? I mean, I know you don't skip from breaking up, to I'm going to be your boyfriend now...but still...

He has his own emotional relationship timeline which means although you might feel like it's good to go RIGHT NOW, he doesn't, it may take him months to get to were you are so...

Just relax and go out with other people as well, if he spoke about his X then he may have some lagging feelings/unresolved issues and plus dating other women including you as well, so stay busy thinking about YOU more than him because the more you think about him the more your going to obsess and the higher your expectation level and angst grows.

He likes you, to clarify like, like to a man can be I like you like I like my favorite ice cream but I don't want to eat it every day, I like you but not enough to throw away my options to date other women, I like you but not enough to throw away my single life e.g. FREEDOM.

When men are in and out it's a SIGN, it's not necessarily a bad sign, this kind of behavior is HONEST because men that behave this way keep things casual and not too close, they usually do this in and out dance to slow the woman down to meet his tempo, he doesn't want to lose the connection he has with you he doesn't want to get too close to create this idea in YOUR mind that you are going to be in a REAL relationship with him. Right now he's enjoying you in a casual non-commited way, if your seeking a real relationship dump this guy but if your okay being his good for now casual girl then have fun and don't worry too much about it.

he's dating you...nothing wrong with that...have fun

Posted by curious visitor
libras are not inclined to say things like that unless they mean it.

oh, and when a libra says they like someone a lot, it's usually a massive understatement. we're not good with feelings.

Really? They mean what they say? Cuz, my ex who screwed me over apologized to me after 2 yrs of splitting up, but I didn't think he meant it. I do sense that he is sad though. It may be b/c of me or cuz he doesn't have anyone "special" right now and I've moved on.

Ok, so a lot has changed. He is coming around, calling and texting like everyday, and I even met his daughter. He asked me to go with him and pick her up at the mom's house...in my car! He wasnt hiding me. Then, all of us came back to my house, ate a pizza we picked up, and watched movies on NYE. I was like wow. Then, the next day, he brought her back over and met my mother, brother, and cousin. We were riding in his car to go somewhere and he just blurts out, "I want to meet your dad". I was like ok, but I am not going to let him meet him yet. I have to determine if we are going to be in a relationship first. That's the major step for me. Once you meet my dad...it's for real. So, I am holding that card.
He also took me to work with him two days in a row (he is a driver). We had sooo much fun. We even stopped along the way to play a game of pool at one of his drop points...I mean, who takes a friend to work like that?? I am trying not to look too much into this but I can't help it. However, I am taking it super slow when I am around him. Inside I feel like Vegas. On the outside, I am like Fargo. Well, not that cold, but you get the idea. He told me that I have everything he normally goes for. Skin, hair, complexion, beauty, etc. But he says that he doesn't want to mess up the friendship by doing something or by me doing something because that would be it and he wouldn't even want to hear it. He doesnt know that I would not ever hurt him, but I didn't say anything. I just said ok. If that is what you want, that is fine. I just want us to be friends and I want you to be comfortable. After that, he left my house and I followed, because I was going out that night. He texted me at 3:45 that same night up until 5am, asking me where, what, when, why, and who I was with, etc. Im like, we are just friends!! What is going on? I am keeping it mellow and cool, but I secretly hope that he wants me just as much as I want him...can anyone give me some insight?? Please. I just want to know how to play this out. Above all else we are friends, but does he want more eventually? I read that Libras confuse friends with lovers and I don't understand that. If it is not going to be anything more between us, then why do all of this?

One more thing: We have been physical in the past. Now, he won't do anything sexual with me. I try not to press the issue, because for one, I am a woman and I try not to be super aggressive (hard, cuz I am a Scorpio) and I dont want to turn him off. The night that we were riding, I told him that it was getting hard to be close to him without getting physical. He was like what do you mean? I said, nevermind. Then, later when we were texting I asked him did I turn him on and he said yes. Then he told me I need to stop thinking about dumb questions. Why is he witholding sex from me? Prior to us not treetrunking, the last time we did he said we should do this more often. Then, weeks later he gave me a pound because he said it was really good (we were talking over a meal and he brought up our last encounter). Does this mean something when they sex you, then stop, then come around and call like crazy— Or is this just one of their tactics?

Anyone?

Scorpiana... keep taking it slow and casual. Don't rush things, not even the sex you really want. It's a rare guy who doesn't just, uh.. "shoplift the pooty" especially when offered up with the whole no-strings-we're-just-friends-right-now thing. Enjoy DATING him and getting to know him better - friends first makes a truly AWESOME relationship when it happens. Have FUN with it. Don't worry so much about what HE'S thinking and feeling. Let HIM be responsible for his own emotions, and YOU be responsible for YOURS.

It's not a "tactic" - he's very interested, getting to know you, enjoying you, and taking it SLOOOOWWWWW. He's trying to not let his little head do the thinking for his big head. He's weighing and balancing, as Libras do, to see if you might be The One. He seems like a good guy, one who doesn't want to just have a bit of a FWB with you. A man only wants a relationship with a woman who shows him that being IN a relationship with her is more fun, wonderful, and exciting than being single and free. A man who "doesn't want a relationship" is really saying he doesn't want a relationship with the WRONG woman (again?)! Let him SEE you are the right woman, but don't try to MAKE him see it. Just be yourself, slow and easy, and things will fall into place.

Oh, also... the advice I just gave? It's exactly how I was with MY Libra beloved in the beginning. We started as friends, slow and casual. My GOD, we had SO much fun - it didn't feel like a typical "friendship" to me, either. But as my feelings for him developed over time, I kept my cool (Fargo lol I love that, might steal it!), enjoyed dating and getting to know him as our relationship progressed beyond friendship... and yes, when he went through a "deciding phase" (as they tend to do before the Next Big Step).. yes, he backed off and stopped sleeping with me - later telling me it was to keep his head clear and make sure he wasn't confusing sexual chemistry and connection with an emotional one.

Last night, my Libra took me for a late night ride around on the back roads, like we used to do ALL the time, but not as much lately (winter!). He stopped the truck, turned to me and cupped my face gently, saying, "I took you on this ride tonight so we could fall in love all over again. Every time we ride around like this, we fall in love again." And then he kissed me like it was the first time all over again, shaking hands and everything. THAT'S a Libra... even a self-professed, so-called UNromantic one like mine says he is... has a romantic streak a mile wide. They just want to be SURE of you before they invest their hearts too deeply, especially if they've been hurt before - and who hasn't, really? Show Mr. Libra who you truly are, over time, and your reward might possibly be his heart forever!

Posted by little_sparrow
Scorpiana this is a very serious question.

Why do you assume that there is something wrong with you? aka "I see what you are both saying but it is me. I know it is." Could it be possible that he just isn't giving you what you need to feel safe, secure, and loved?

The problem is you are feeling a little angst. This should be a sign that something just isn't right for you but instead you are trying to force yourself to be comfortable and accept the situation despite that little angsty alarm bell in the back of your head.

FWIW, Hollywood lied. Good relationships are not angsty, anxiety riddled highs and lows, with passionate steamy blows of emotion. They are when you feel secure, happy, because your partner is reliable and does exactly what they say they will and you can trust them to want the best for you. It is when you are with the person because you WANT to be and choose to be, not because you need to be. Definetly not that exciting, but stable and comforting and lasting.

So maybe it isn't just you. Maybe it isn't him either. Maybe it is just the combination of the two of you together. If you are feeling anxiety and longing, ask yourself if this is the type of love you really want.

Just some thoughts.

Very well spoken.

If you want a guy who says what he means get with an Aries, libra guys usually say somethng than think "OMG did i make the right choice" ahhhh... yup!

Posted by CancerianGoddess
If you want a guy who says what he means get with an Aries, libra guys usually say somethng than think "OMG did i make the right choice" ahhhh... yup!

lmao.. yeah they do change their minds 10x.

When Librans fall, we fall very hard, very fast, and very very blindly. It's actually a little scary, in ways, so we need reassurance that you care too to give us that security/stability.

Dont' send us mixed signals, most of us hate them.

Hey Scorpiana, any new updates?

UPDATE: Well, needless to say, that he is still around...a little. I went to work with him yesterday and we ate lunch or whatever. I was with him alllllll day. I asked him if I was just his work buddy and he said no. I am someone that he can talk to, chill with, be with, etc. Sure. Then why is it that we never do any of these things (that much)? I still like him a lot and I know he likes me, but I just can't shake him. He is still living with the ex, but he continuously says that he is moving out, and uses statements like when I move out, and we went looking for furniture as well yesterday...I don't know guys. I'm really confused and he touches me and runs his fingers through my hair and compliments the crap outta me. But I kinda just brush it off with thank you's because I know how Libras can be. They are kind of in the moment people. I also figured out that Im on the cusp, so I have some Libra in me as well. Shouldn't we really really get on better than what we are right now?
Also, I was sort of frustrated yesterday while we riding. And I wasn't really snappy, but he kind of noticed it. He asked me was I on my freaking period. I was like you are dead to me in a joking way and he grabbed me out of the van and tried to dance with me. It was funny. Then he said, I love joking around with you, when you can take it. It's like everyone says, when you are with a Libra, they make you feel like the only one. But when you are not in their eyesight, there is nothing. I haven't heard from him all day long today...Sooo, I sent him a text saying that I realize I may have been acting a lil funny, but that I'm going through some stuff and I didn't want to drag him down or depress him, so I'm just sorting things out on my own and that it wouldn't happen again...no reply. I didn't expect one really but one would have been nice. I just don't know what to think.
I think that he is staying there until he moves out, but is trying to keep things level at his house PLUS maybe keep me around until he can make a choice. Now, that being said, plus all the other stuff, what gives? Can anyone tell me what is going on with him? Please? Like, we have NO sex and I know he is attracted. Hell, everytime we go somewhere guys stare. Not that Im all that, but I can pull my own, you know? But he won't have sex with me still, and yet we have been there before around 5 or 6 times. How do you do that? I'm pretty ok with not having sex, but don't talk about it or insinuate it..with me.

So, should I just say fugg it or continue to be his friend? I mean, I like him as a friend but I just want to know what to expect from him. He said that he would be willing to give us a try. But since he didn't respond to what I said, I'm just not going to contact him and give him his space. I love you guys on dxp and I would sure appreciate a pep talk to get me through this...

yeah. you're clearly sending him mixed signals. stop that.

here's the thing you need to know about libras...we've got a reputation for being indecisive, but we pretty much always fall hard and fast. it doesn't come up suddenly. it can't be earned. so either he likes you or he doesn't. you can make him insecure and uncomfortable by making him second guess himself. or you can freak him out by being all possessive and demanding. but if he likes you, you should be honest about liking him too. if you want to be friends, give up hopes of romance. if you want romance, give up hopes of friendship. it's one or the other.

your text was awkward. what was he supposed to say? i wouldn't know what to say. and when we don't know what to say, we don't say anything at all, because we don't want to say the wrong thing. you're going through some stuff and didn't want to drag him down? geez. too much emotion. libras feel plenty, but we don't like to express it. and we don't like it getting expressed to us. no matter how much i feel for a guy, if his eyes tear up, my instinct is to run far away and hide. stop being so damned emotional.

if you're on the cusp, you probably don't have much libra, btw. go to astro.com and do your chart. i'm gonna guess that your venus is probably in virgo and your mars is either in virgo or leo.

but no matter what...and this is very important...as long as you keep telling him you want to be friends, as long as he has any doubts in his mind that you want more than that, he will never, ever, ever try to have more. because libras don't like to rock the boat. and romantic overtures will send it capsizing if the other person doesn't feel the same. so either you do it or just move on forever. because he isn't ever going to. ever.

@Curious: How am I sending mixed messages? He told me he just wanted to be friends. He told me that he liked me alot. He initiates meetings, and gets all touchy-feely. He plays with my hair. I just react off of him...

But, at any rate, how can I fix this? I haven't spoken to him in a couple of days, but I really didn't plan to anyway. But, how I can I get this back on track?

as in, a libra doesn't say they like you unless they're actually madly in love with you. it's rare that a libra will come right out and say what they feel, they usually will pretend that what they feel is much less intense than the reality.

Curious, still true? Just curious.

How did this turn out?

This thread is 4-5 years old.

And if you're coming across the same situation the OP was- spoiler alert!

This guy was never really into her as much as he claimed. ACTIONS always trump words, sorry. He was full of shit from the second he chose to TEXT her his feelings.

Red flag #1.

Red flag #2 was the fact that he kept her in limbo and STRUNG her along.

Red flag #3 is the fact that she remained so "confused."

Ladies, when a guy's weird fuck behavior leaves you confused and not sure wtf is going on, MOVE ON. He's being a laggy douche that cannot/will not make up his mind. He still wants to play around while having an option if the playing around doesn't pan out.

This Curious Visitor person was giving absolutely misguided advice and basically helping the guy string her along like he was. Giving false hope in the form of advice is the biggest asshole thing anyone can do. I mean look at the poor little girls who came along hoping that snippet of bullshit was true for a guy they too are pining for who is jerking them around.

Ladies stop tolerating bullshit. Period. Life is not a romantic comedy and there is not THAT much grey area when it comes with guys and dating, sorry.

I agree to rockyroadicecream. I had a Libra guy friend before too.. and we really like each other but he can't make up his mind. When he is there we are are awesome and i am contented, but when he is not i have no clue what is going on. He tells me he loves me even then there are days he tells me i am a good friend. This keeps happening for a long period of time.. So since he cannot decide, i decided for him. I told him his words are confusing and unreliable. He just stop talking to me. He do not even have a balls to explain himself.

I am a libra myself but i never run a round the bush with someones feelings. When i date someone, i will have couple of dates and tell them we don't really click and we can just be friends. With Capricorn and Pisces men when you tell them lets just be friends.. they agreed and act like one.. But mostly Libra men do not act to what is supposed to be friends.

But again not all men Libras are like that. I have a Libra guy friend that i really appreciate. We were colleagues at work and we always get along. I can call him anytime and we will have a good talk even meet outside at midnight to eat out and have a long conversation. One time he tried to kiss me but i politely decline and said our friendship is much better. He apologized and never act like that ever again.

I guess one thing women should know about Libra men is that they themselves are already confuse so just be straight forward to them and they will know where to stand in a so called friendship. 🙂

Hmm.. I wonder how is he.. I miss his company! Happy New Year Everyone!

I know not all are like that. If you go to every single sign specific forum here, and read all the tales of woe from women in regard to the guys that they're dealing with, almost all stories sound the same regardless of sign. It's just what stupid, immature, selfish guys do in dating. Women just need to quit tolerating this crap and stop falling for the usual bs that's totally see through once you know it's about. Hell, it's like that with guys dealing with stupid girls who act like that too.

And shame on all the idiots who tell them otherwise. It's just helping string them along more. It annoys me when people give advice to coddle, not help.

Hell Yeah! Shame on them! 😉