Aramei
@Aramei
13 YearsScorpio
Comments: 0 · Posts: 280 · Topics: 20
Llibra men and their true thoughts
I think I just need to let him know that if he wants me I'm here, time for me to move on and forget him. I really don't want to but I can't force him to be with me. 😢 I know he likes me but that dang Libra indecisiveness and wanting the chase but not wanting me after he has me thing really has me confused.
I am going through the exact same thing as you! It's so hard as you really don't want to lose him.
Everything was amazing in the beginning, he did all the chasing, planning to meet up, telling you he really likes you, and now you feel that if you don't contact him you probably won't hear from him?
I need to have a conversation with my Libra man to help put things straight, have you done that yet? I want to know where I stand. I will walk away if he doesn't feel the same.
Everything was amazing in the beginning, he did all the chasing, planning to meet up, telling you he really likes you, and now you feel that if you don't contact him you probably won't hear from him?
I need to have a conversation with my Libra man to help put things straight, have you done that yet? I want to know where I stand. I will walk away if he doesn't feel the same.
Lol, same thing happened to me and my Libra ex even though she's a woman.
I was in the SAME situation as you a few years ago.
basically, with libras, everything has to be a perfect balance (look at their sign - its a scale). In short, if one thing of his life is "off," chances are everything else will be. I took the chance and stuck around on my terms. However, when I felt that things were not going the way I wanted to, I backed off and told him I can't keep going through the same circle. This is when grand gestures began.
I noticed your a water sign, like me (I'm a Pisces); however, in my situation, emotions got the best of me and it just went sour. Im one to fight for what I believe in, and personally, I believed in us. I used my intuition and kept on going after when it felt "right." Eventually, our relationship ended. I don't know how or what you should say to him because as I said, if he said one aspect of his life is not going well, nothing will. This has nothing to do with you, but is rather, his own issue. I'm not sure what you could and should do because in my situation, the idea of the relationship was always his idea. I am a pisces and I read somewhere that they tend to pick partners who are domineering and uncaring - can say this is kind of true because the most intense relationships were those with guys who took charge of it. I wish you luck and you can private message me if you have any other questions or concerns
basically, with libras, everything has to be a perfect balance (look at their sign - its a scale). In short, if one thing of his life is "off," chances are everything else will be. I took the chance and stuck around on my terms. However, when I felt that things were not going the way I wanted to, I backed off and told him I can't keep going through the same circle. This is when grand gestures began.
I noticed your a water sign, like me (I'm a Pisces); however, in my situation, emotions got the best of me and it just went sour. Im one to fight for what I believe in, and personally, I believed in us. I used my intuition and kept on going after when it felt "right." Eventually, our relationship ended. I don't know how or what you should say to him because as I said, if he said one aspect of his life is not going well, nothing will. This has nothing to do with you, but is rather, his own issue. I'm not sure what you could and should do because in my situation, the idea of the relationship was always his idea. I am a pisces and I read somewhere that they tend to pick partners who are domineering and uncaring - can say this is kind of true because the most intense relationships were those with guys who took charge of it. I wish you luck and you can private message me if you have any other questions or concerns
Posted by Metoo
Is there really alot going on in his life that is so bad?
Irecommend you call his bluff and move on and dont answer texts, calls or emails.
Make a statement, cause a real man would just stop hurting you!
Seems to me I have heard this talk before when the boy has been very, very bad
so he takes this extreme approach for getting off the hook with everything
by saying, All I do is hurt you...you should move on.
This accomplishes one of several things and I am not sure which he is trying to accomplish
I hope I am not off base but have a hunch he is up to no good with his lame breakup logic.
He either:
1. Messed up and so he is saying move on cause I just hurt you when the response he is hoping for is
"NO!!! Your wonderful and make me happy, dont go" (ie. he is off the hook for all misdeeds)
2. He wanted to break up so stating like he did almost makes it sound like it was mutual and even potentially your idea
3. There is someone else and he is building up an alibi saying he is lost and confused so if you find out he can say "Itold you we were on a break, and that I was lost and confused"
Its all three.
Posted by Theultra79
I think you should take metoo's advice. Let this be the end. He trying to end it. It's either option #2 or #3. I've broken things off with someone this exact same way. He's probably not lying, and he puts all the blame on himself assuaging his guilt. If you keep after him at this point, he's still guilt-free when he continues to mistreat you because he already told you wassup.
^ this
I've done this as well
Posted by DelaneiaPosted by Theultra79
I think you should take metoo's advice. Let this be the end. He trying to end it. It's either option #2 or #3. I've broken things off with someone this exact same way. He's probably not lying, and he puts all the blame on himself assuaging his guilt. If you keep after him at this point, he's still guilt-free when he continues to mistreat you because he already told you wassup.
^ this
I've done this as wellclick to expand
Looks like TheUltra hit the nail on the head. But with this Leeb guy he might come running back when you do finally break it off . Itll be is loss , I know a Scorp girl with a Sag moon and she 'The BOMB' I mean... SUPER AWESOME ! . Chin-up ! I've got a feeling you deserve better anyway ! 🙂
LEAVE IMMEDIATELY!!! Libra guys are crazy, and when you show signs of distance after being the pursuer, they come crawling back. In my experience, they are of sado/masochistic nature, either one of two extremes. You have got to treat them a little bad for them to want you. They like it when you're cold with them. If you aren't, or if you treat them too kindly, or show any signs of emotional attachment, they'll just leave. They like to play the distance game. Sometimes you see them, sometimes you don't (at all). But my advice is to leave, and stay gone. Not worth it. Eventually you'll realize this. Good luck!
Thanks Libragemmale.....I am THE BOMB :-)
Well....guess what! He calls me tonight. Giving me the story that his life is a mess. He was real emotional so I could tell he was being truthful. I know he is having some problems in his life and that he is feeling like that is throwing off his ability to be fair to me. I didn't say much to him other then let him know I'm here for him to talk to. He does seem sincere in wanting a relationship with me...just seems like he can't fully be "there" for me right now.
It did feel better to know that he really isn't blowing me off but I am not sure how much more of this back and forth I can take.
Well....guess what! He calls me tonight. Giving me the story that his life is a mess. He was real emotional so I could tell he was being truthful. I know he is having some problems in his life and that he is feeling like that is throwing off his ability to be fair to me. I didn't say much to him other then let him know I'm here for him to talk to. He does seem sincere in wanting a relationship with me...just seems like he can't fully be "there" for me right now.
It did feel better to know that he really isn't blowing me off but I am not sure how much more of this back and forth I can take.
Heed his warning. If a guy is telling you things like that, BELIEVE HIM. If he's acknowledging that he's being a douche to you and wants you to take the out, DO IT.
Anything along the lines of "I'm a ________" or anything else foretelling of crappy behavior, means he's usually right and you should move on/do what he suggests. Believe it when he says it. He's not being self deprecating.
As for your situation, you should really consider moving on. When he feels he can get his shit together and be a decent person, AND he actually wants you, he'll be back.
I noticed that my libra ex was going through some stuff and sorta threw the same argument at me when breaking up. That whole "I can't do all this blah blah whatever." Aka, guys can't handle stress and shit in life sometimes, so they ditch something "disposable" to them. In this instance- the relationship.
Since then, he hasn't dated and just focuses on work and terrorizing his friends with his unbalanced issues in life (from what they've told me). Knowing this, I'm kinda glad he didn't attempt to stretch the relationship out because he was already driving me crazy with the hot/cold weirdo behavior. I don't think I could have put up with it much longer.
Do you really think you can tolerate this behavior much longer? Relationships are supposed to be beneficial. Not another major source of stress in life.
Anything along the lines of "I'm a ________" or anything else foretelling of crappy behavior, means he's usually right and you should move on/do what he suggests. Believe it when he says it. He's not being self deprecating.
As for your situation, you should really consider moving on. When he feels he can get his shit together and be a decent person, AND he actually wants you, he'll be back.
I noticed that my libra ex was going through some stuff and sorta threw the same argument at me when breaking up. That whole "I can't do all this blah blah whatever." Aka, guys can't handle stress and shit in life sometimes, so they ditch something "disposable" to them. In this instance- the relationship.
Since then, he hasn't dated and just focuses on work and terrorizing his friends with his unbalanced issues in life (from what they've told me). Knowing this, I'm kinda glad he didn't attempt to stretch the relationship out because he was already driving me crazy with the hot/cold weirdo behavior. I don't think I could have put up with it much longer.
Do you really think you can tolerate this behavior much longer? Relationships are supposed to be beneficial. Not another major source of stress in life.
Posted by rockyroadicecream
Heed his warning. If a guy is telling you things like that, BELIEVE HIM. If he's acknowledging that he's being a douche to you and wants you to take the out, DO IT.
Anything along the lines of "I'm a ________" or anything else foretelling of crappy behavior, means he's usually right and you should move on/do what he suggests. Believe it when he says it. He's not being self deprecating.
As for your situation, you should really consider moving on. When he feels he can get his shit together and be a decent person, AND he actually wants you, he'll be back.
I noticed that my libra ex was going through some stuff and sorta threw the same argument at me when breaking up. That whole "I can't do all this blah blah whatever." Aka, guys can't handle stress and shit in life sometimes, so they ditch something "disposable" to them. In this instance- the relationship.
Since then, he hasn't dated and just focuses on work and terrorizing his friends with his unbalanced issues in life (from what they've told me). Knowing this, I'm kinda glad he didn't attempt to stretch the relationship out because he was already driving me crazy with the hot/cold weirdo behavior. I don't think I could have put up with it much longer.
Do you really think you can tolerate this behavior much longer? Relationships are supposed to be beneficial. Not another major source of stress in life.
Sounds like good advice to me I see this so often about lIbras But I,m so lost on this I'm a Libra also but I've never acted like this ever. Let him go and see if he can get his life together If he does then maybe he will come back and you can decide what you want then and if he doesn't then you don't have to witmness a train wreck.
Posted by lblibra
Sounds like good advice to me I see this so often about lIbras But I,m so lost on this I'm a Libra also but I've never acted like this ever. Let him go and see if he can get his life together If he does then maybe he will come back and you can decide what you want then and if he doesn't then you don't have to witmness a train wreck.
Well overall, no matter what a guy is going through, if they want you enough, they don't do shit like this. They keep the relationship and don't consider it "disposable" and something to rid themselves of when going through shit. It's such a typical excuse for these type of guys.
Sure, I'd believe that shit is getting hard and they're struggling internally, so they behave like they do. Happens to everyone once in awhile. We're all human. However, going as far as ending relationships over it- it's immature and it shows that they really aren't all that into you if they're willing to ditch you at the first sign of a life conflict. I mean really, say if you were to go long term with someone like that. How the hell are they going to respond if you were to be married or have kids?
"Oh, things are getting too hard. I'm gonna drop all of this and run away to face my own demons." Doesn't sound very reliable to me... Makes you question if THEY'RE worth keeping around.
Wow. I am impressed. People are actually giving you good advice not just placating you with love will work it out shit.
What he is going through doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if he has feelings for you or doesn't. Is he consistent? Is he reliable? Does he honour his commitments? This guy is telling you NOOOO I don't! He is also taking the lazy way out by saying I like you but I am tooo poor me to do anything about it. You do all the work. Give up the kitty. And maybe I will hang out with you when it is convenient for me. And on your way over with the kitty can you pick me up a pizza too?
Doesn't matter the reason he has told you he is not going to give this his all. He is not going to bust his butt trying to impress you. He is going to do less than the bare minimum and if you are willing to accept that then maybe, when it crosses his mind, he will pay you some attention.
As someone above me said, guys who are crazy about you .... don't do this. My partner was in the midst of a terrible (and I mean TERRIBLE) divorce when I met him. He didn't give me one second of worry during our whole courtship. When guys are crazy about you, they let you know.
It doesn't matter how much he likes or loves you. You could be the most compatible people on the planet and it doesn't matter. Buddy boy isn't going to be your guy. I know that is heart breaking to hear but take it from me, you can't make them ready. They either are or they aren't. He sounds like he is going through a bad break-up or something and he is an emotional wreck. Not. Your. Problem. All you can do is release him into the wild and let him become someone else's problem.
When I was dating, someone gave me some great advice. Don't focus on whether or not he likes you. Focus on whether or not you like him. Do you like the way he treats you, etc? And remember, guys who are worth the trouble make an effort at least at the beginning of the relationship. If they aren't doing anything at the very beginning imagine what they will be like in 20 yrs time. Not worth the investment.
Don't waste time on people that don't waste time on you.
What he is going through doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if he has feelings for you or doesn't. Is he consistent? Is he reliable? Does he honour his commitments? This guy is telling you NOOOO I don't! He is also taking the lazy way out by saying I like you but I am tooo poor me to do anything about it. You do all the work. Give up the kitty. And maybe I will hang out with you when it is convenient for me. And on your way over with the kitty can you pick me up a pizza too?
Doesn't matter the reason he has told you he is not going to give this his all. He is not going to bust his butt trying to impress you. He is going to do less than the bare minimum and if you are willing to accept that then maybe, when it crosses his mind, he will pay you some attention.
As someone above me said, guys who are crazy about you .... don't do this. My partner was in the midst of a terrible (and I mean TERRIBLE) divorce when I met him. He didn't give me one second of worry during our whole courtship. When guys are crazy about you, they let you know.
It doesn't matter how much he likes or loves you. You could be the most compatible people on the planet and it doesn't matter. Buddy boy isn't going to be your guy. I know that is heart breaking to hear but take it from me, you can't make them ready. They either are or they aren't. He sounds like he is going through a bad break-up or something and he is an emotional wreck. Not. Your. Problem. All you can do is release him into the wild and let him become someone else's problem.
When I was dating, someone gave me some great advice. Don't focus on whether or not he likes you. Focus on whether or not you like him. Do you like the way he treats you, etc? And remember, guys who are worth the trouble make an effort at least at the beginning of the relationship. If they aren't doing anything at the very beginning imagine what they will be like in 20 yrs time. Not worth the investment.
Don't waste time on people that don't waste time on you.
^ Serious agreement!
I agree with what EVERYONE has said. Yes, he is having some personal life issues. I have stepped back and am just a friend when he needs to talk. I finally see that he isn't ready for a relationship. Still waiting patiently for when he is ready, I am just not forcing the relationship and doing my own thing till when and if he is. I really have no desire to look for anyone else so this is all good for me right now
Libras amaze me and keep me interested :-)
Libras amaze me and keep me interested :-)
Posted by Aramei
Libras amaze me and keep me interested :-)
Thats because the good ones can be amazingly interesting 😛
I am almost in the same situation....what should I do...am not able to get over this guy...its been more than two weeks since we spoke...is he gone for real...here's my story!!
Hey I met a Libran guy about 3 months ago...when we first met he wanted to start dating immediately and I thought it was way too fast...so I took my time to get to know him, well it's a long distance relationship, so we would meet about twice a month ( long weekends). after we used to meet he would go quiet and I couldn't handle it as I like communication in a relationship..I mean who wouldn't. he was hell bent upon going for a holiday which I gave into after a lot of thought...again he goes quiet for almost 10 days..(P.s we had a little fight there, and knowing me I like to finish talking then and there instead of carrying matters forward). He comes back after 10 days and says he missed me and how much he cares for me and that I should not fight and blah blah...we met again and went out for the weekend...again a little fight which was blown out of proportion...well I believe every action receives and equal reaction...when we fight he just goes quiet...we spoke about it the next day...everything was normal...he left saying we will try...I didnt bother messaging him, and one day I did saying I miss him....and asked him if the relationship had any scope...he said he cant handle my drama and its best if we move on....a very open ended closure....come to think of it, I think I have fallen for him....and just wondering reading all the posts about Libran men doing the disappearing act...will he come back...he has said that he does not want to take it forward...shall I move on or give this a chance...
Hey I met a Libran guy about 3 months ago...when we first met he wanted to start dating immediately and I thought it was way too fast...so I took my time to get to know him, well it's a long distance relationship, so we would meet about twice a month ( long weekends). after we used to meet he would go quiet and I couldn't handle it as I like communication in a relationship..I mean who wouldn't. he was hell bent upon going for a holiday which I gave into after a lot of thought...again he goes quiet for almost 10 days..(P.s we had a little fight there, and knowing me I like to finish talking then and there instead of carrying matters forward). He comes back after 10 days and says he missed me and how much he cares for me and that I should not fight and blah blah...we met again and went out for the weekend...again a little fight which was blown out of proportion...well I believe every action receives and equal reaction...when we fight he just goes quiet...we spoke about it the next day...everything was normal...he left saying we will try...I didnt bother messaging him, and one day I did saying I miss him....and asked him if the relationship had any scope...he said he cant handle my drama and its best if we move on....a very open ended closure....come to think of it, I think I have fallen for him....and just wondering reading all the posts about Libran men doing the disappearing act...will he come back...he has said that he does not want to take it forward...shall I move on or give this a chance...
Well, I have been very patient with him. I do not feel I should let him get away with bad behavior but the only bad behavior has been the come and go nature he has. We did have a date Friday night and it was a WONDERFUL time. We talked and it really is strange how much we are alike. Maybe being a Libra/Scorp cusp helps some? because I can really understand where he comes from with some of his thoughts.
I do NOT like that I can't see him as much as I'd like, but I know he is also teaching me patience. I tend to act impulsively sometimes 😢 wanting to spend the whole weekend with him.
Now I'm afraid I said too much because now I probably won't hear from him for a few days again..LOL We have been texting through the weekend so that is nice.
So far so good! Just taking things slow, which is what we agreed to do in the beginning.
Leo80, I have learned the hard way with this Libra man. He is the first I've met. My advice...which I cannot say is good advice as I'm still learning, but from what I've learned. Just be patient with him, let him know you are there for him but do what you need to do for YOU. Do not let him think you NEED him. Let him chase you. As far as whether he will return, Libras need time to sit back and think about what happened. It may take some time but let him have that time.
I do NOT like that I can't see him as much as I'd like, but I know he is also teaching me patience. I tend to act impulsively sometimes 😢 wanting to spend the whole weekend with him.
Now I'm afraid I said too much because now I probably won't hear from him for a few days again..LOL We have been texting through the weekend so that is nice.
So far so good! Just taking things slow, which is what we agreed to do in the beginning.
Leo80, I have learned the hard way with this Libra man. He is the first I've met. My advice...which I cannot say is good advice as I'm still learning, but from what I've learned. Just be patient with him, let him know you are there for him but do what you need to do for YOU. Do not let him think you NEED him. Let him chase you. As far as whether he will return, Libras need time to sit back and think about what happened. It may take some time but let him have that time.
Some women shouldn't be allowed to date until they get their shit together. :/
Posted by Aramei
Now I'm afraid I said too much because now I probably won't hear from him for a few days again..LOL We have been texting through the weekend so that is nice.
So far so good! Just taking things slow, which is what we agreed to do in the beginning.
Leo80, I have learned the hard way with this Libra man. He is the first I've met. My advice...which I cannot say is good advice as I'm still learning, but from what I've learned. Just be patient with him, let him know you are there for him but do what you need to do for YOU. Do not let him think you NEED him. Let him chase you. As far as whether he will return, Libras need time to sit back and think about what happened. It may take some time but let him have that time.
This is good advice. Bravo. Needy partners freak me out. And yes, if you had an intense convo you won't hear from us the next day. LOL. I'm hanging with a scorp and this is true for both of us (thank God). Our ebbs and flows are in sync.
how do I let him am there for him....cause he has clearly said let's move on.....like you said I have no choice to wait and see if he comes around...if he doesn't I guess its over. 😢
guys I was just analyzing the whole situation, and it occurred to me that he did give the relationship a fair chance by coming down the second time after our first fight...and now that he has backed off, do you think I should make the move, though my ego is stopping me from doing it.
There was a time when he had lied to me about something he should have mentioned right at the start and I let go off it, dont you think he should it give it a chance, I dont want to come across as needy, but still want to give it a chance, as there was nothing major that went wrong between the two of us...
Please advice...if yes how do I go about doing it?
There was a time when he had lied to me about something he should have mentioned right at the start and I let go off it, dont you think he should it give it a chance, I dont want to come across as needy, but still want to give it a chance, as there was nothing major that went wrong between the two of us...
Please advice...if yes how do I go about doing it?
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