Tired of Not being in a Committed Relationship

Suggestions?

stop trying so hard...

Dont stop at one girl. Go around and smile at every 3rd girl you meet. Atleast you aint shy like we poor libras. So you stand a better chance. Good luck.

find one who is willing to commit.
If you think about it, we stay on with people who fit our mindset at the moment. If you're with a non-commital person, it shows that you're most comfortable with it at the moment. Once you really want commitment, and that person doesn't offer it, you'll find someone else who does.
Do you REALLY want to be in a committed relationship? As you mentioned, you lost the amor for your LibraGirl once she started calling you. A committed relationship prolly involves that, and if you pull away once she starts being suffocating, she'll get the hint and it'll be a perpetual non-committed cycle. One partner can take action only if the other is ready.

Atom, only suggestion is move on.....I had to and you know how smitten I was with my Libra. One day at a time and OMG time does actually allow you to see that you've wasted so much time on one person when in fact you could have had a lot more fun with others....as thelibran said...."dont stop at one girl".

the world is your oyster....OMG oysters?? yummmmmmmm!!!!!!!!

* Once you really want commitment, and that person doesn't offer it, you'll find someone else who does.

This was exactly what I was going to write. A committed relationship is not going to happen for you until you put the libragirl out of your heart. As long as she is staking claim on your heart, there is no room for anyone else. You are unavailable to those wanting a committed relationship because they sense your unavailability.

I am too Atom...lets hook up! I'll be good to you I swear...You and me what do you say?

LOL, LL, 'Sounds good as long as I don't break Chatz' heart. Seriously though, Chatz, LS, HOW do you detach? spica, I appreciate your incite. And I don't believe I lost my amor for LG due to her calling but because way too much time went by and my feelings cooled way down.

I know how you feel Atom..the long-term single life does NOT suit this Libra 😢

I know its because my only "real" relationship (7 years with a virgo) ended so badly and i was left with nothing but hate. Its hard to be optimistic when there is always so much doubt in the back of my mind!!

Im a good candidate, if you stay around long enough to find out!

Atom

I don't know if Chatz or I (the queens of suffering far too long) are good people to advise you but I think it comes down to just finally accepting that it isn't going to happen. For me that is the hardest part, because I always hold onto the hope LOOOONNNGGG after it has gone.

I think accepting that you feel bad about the situation (if you do) is also a good step. This is also very hard for me because I always try to be cool and happy about everything. I don't like disapproving of those I love. I feel like I am failing them.

So accept the situation for what it is. Let yourself feel all those horrible feelings of anger, frustration, and bitterness then decided you really DO want a committed relationship and go out with an open heart to seek one.

Atom get photos (if u have any) and anything that relates to LG and put them in a box up on a high shelf..leave her there for a while, dont go through it, just leave her there - she is in your heart but u dont have to surround yourself with her....it worked for me. I love my libra to bits although I am seeing somebody else now but when it hurts more than it makes you happy— put em on a shelf where they put you

Atom, sometimes the right person comes along when you're not looking for them. And sometimes when we ARE out there looking for someone we find someone amazing. The thing is you have to be out there looking AND making yourself available when you're not looking. It's hard to be patient when you've been doing that for awhile.

Perhaps the Universe has a way of keeping you in a non-committed relationship in order for the right person to come along for you but only when the time is RIGHT. Like keeping you unattached until the person you are meant to be with is available too. Basically, just keeping you in a protective box until your paths can cross.

Don't get discouraged. It's a New Year and with it many new opportunities await you !!!

Oh yeah!!!!!!!!

Sometimes, the rare moments where I decide not to blame my partner for my troubles, I see that I really liked this scenario I am in because I chose it. I chose to stay because it is comfortable and what I want for the moment. If I were presented an opportunity for stronger commitment, a leap out of the blue, I wouldn't accept it. I have tried twice with two other people, and am now seeing it for the first time with less fleeting understanding.

If my partner now asks for a solid commitment, and change who he is to fit what I want out of him, I am liable to have more doubts as to his motives or sincerity than I do now. Do you really want a partner who can be forced or moulded into what you want out of them, instead of doing it from their own willingness? I suppose you won't really respect her if that's the case.

However, what I have learnt, and am still learning is, if you really like somebody, truly like them, stay on till the end, because dating other people will hurt them (the other people) if you are in rebound and never made it clear your heart is not with them, even for a moment.

And, if you really really like LG, don't just leave and never look back; libra is won by sincerity.. the few guys that left me, even in spirit, I knew never loved me at all.
My libra guy, even with all that crap I spoke of, has never left me, as I do him, and I am seriously moved by his devotion.

Sola, you ARE a good candidate. And I'm not intending on leaving ANYONE to find someone real who will commit to me as I would to her---keeping my eyes open to SEE who that is, how that works. LG has not shown that committment and can be a dear friend FOREVER but I would really like a day to day woman who enjoys being with me as I do her. It's tough to break the negative emotion stuff but I'm willing to do it and got to do it--even if that may mean arms' length friendship w/ LG. That's okay---I don't know if she'll even notice any difference. LS, thank you for your sincere sharing---it means a lot to me. I have never NOT loved someone I've loved before. It's just time to really SHARE LIFE totally! I think my being OPEN to that has bumped a few planets around already. . .

Yeah, its been 3 years since i split with the virgo loser and im only ready now to try again with someone new. I cant wait to start the whole life sharing thing again..i need it!!

Me too Atom, me too, but don't rush it. Let it happen. It sux being single when you don't want to be!!!!

Thanks for your encouragement and support. I've had THREE lovely ladies TODAY ask me out for lunch---yes, I'm going out w/ all three; three different lunches. No, LG was not one of them. Witty, beautiful, fun women.

atta boy, atom...

LG has screwed up your self esteem and confidence (based on the way you write on here), so it's about time you get out there and date other people.

Like I said earlier in the bost, stop trying so hard to find someone and just let it happen.

I know its because my only "real" relationship (7 years with a virgo)" something in common...except my only real relationship lasted 1 1/2 yrs i think virgos have a way of cornering me into a relationship

Thanks, HP, you're right---getting the ol' confidence back. CHATZ has helped me with that too! 😉