Damage Control - Unfriending on Social Media

Needing help to rectify since I have a hard time articulating and wanted to convey without putting the blame ALL on me since I have a habit of doing that to myself. I recently unfriended someone who I care for, but regretted afterwards. I was emotionally reactive due to the fact I was going through a lot while traveling in Europe. I wanted to see a friend over there, but he was unresponsive, so I messaged again if he can spare a bit to let me share my thoughts and same results. It’s been almost a month, so I removed him and just regretted it without talking about it. So while I’m over here already writing a note so I don’t leave him in the dark, he took notice after two days and confronted me! I’m usually relaxed and understanding with text that don’t need an immediate response, but being absent nearly for a month when I needed him is negligent especially if he opened it without saying anything I feel

Posted by alexscaries

Easy don't use social media

Yeah, I hate it too tbh 😅

Posted by LaLueur

You are visiting Europe and a friend is ignoring you? How come? Is that really a friend?

Well, we planned the hang out back in August and he was going to, but then said he couldn’t meet up due to finances and logistics so I easily remedied it by saying don’t worry about it since I can go over and then silence 🙃

He was going through a lot of issues himself to explain why he was absent back in September, but to do it again in October is suspicious 🤨

Posted by LaLueur

Posted by WarEternal

Posted by LaLueur

You are visiting Europe and a friend is ignoring you? How come? Is that really a friend?

Well, we planned the hang out back in August and he was going to, but then said he couldn’t meet up due to finances and logistics so I easily remedied it by saying don’t worry about it since I can go over and then silence 🙃

He was going through a lot of issues himself to explain why he was absent back in September, but to do it again in October is suspicious 🤨

Ok. Some people withdraw when their situation isn't all perfect. I understand. And financial situations normally don't change overnight. But right now almost everyone is in a bad financial situation we are in an economic war right now so he shouldn't feel like a failure about it.

And to remind you,if he would have wanted to see you...he really really would. He had the guts to explain what's going on and you came forward with a solution so... i would be pissed if i consider him as my friend.

Instead of blaming yourself...Now you could ask him how he wants to make this right? It would be his turn now i guess. Or you take it as it is and won't be sensitive about it and you both go on as usual. But i want to remind you to not be his pushover.

click to expand

I loved reading your post, thank you for that! I don’t want to be anybody’s pushover and he should do his part. He confronted me saying, “did you remove me from your followers?! 😧” and then I replied saying, “I’d like to talk this over voice chat” he has read it, but I’ll give it a bit since he’s working right now

Posted by BLVCKisBVCK

I don't know why you're feeling bad about this. You gave him 2 opportunities to reply to you and he didn't take them.. It took him a month to finally say something and he only did so cause he noticed you unfriended him. You said you were wrting him a note as to not leave him in the dark.. well he had already left you in the dark so he didn't deserve that. He didn't make time for you in an entire month. That spakes volumes. I think you were wise to unfriend him, he isn't acting like a friend or someone who cares.

You’re absolutely right, I suppose the reason I felt bad is because I haven’t done this before

I sent him voice clips and even though it’s cringe, it helps me convey the messages clearly.

Next time mute the person. This way they don’t show up on your feed. You can always unmute if you decide. It’s less permanent and no walk of shame to the friend button when you regret unfriending.

Posted by LaLueur

Get everything out that you have to tell him. You're way too nice,is easy to see.

What's your sign. Libra ? Pisces? And what's his sign?

Ironically, I am an Aries but it could be of my Mars in Pisces. I suppose when dealing with someone I like, I try to gentle, but the Aries will come out if the injustice seeps through

He’s a Pisces man - ever so eluding

Posted by MonaLisa26

Posted by BLVCKisBVCK

I don't know why you're feeling bad about this. You gave him 2 opportunities to reply to you and he didn't take them.. It took him a month to finally say something and he only did so cause he noticed you unfriended him. You said you were wrting him a note as to not leave him in the dark.. well he had already left you in the dark so he didn't deserve that. He didn't make time for you in an entire month. That spakes volumes. I think you were wise to unfriend him, he isn't acting like a friend or someone who cares.

WHY is it necessary to unfriend? WHY not to just leave it as is? Unfriending seems like throwing temper tantrum.

While having decade of life changing I had not communicated with my childhood friends because they couldnt help me from Europe and I didnt want them to see me weak. I didnt feel like living, more less talking...

Then we got back together. No questions. No hurt feelings. If you are a friend - be a friend.

click to expand

Because I was ignored when I needed him and seeing him continue to interact online without getting back to me to something important is negligent. It’s been a thing for awhile, but I’ve made exceptions that I shouldn’t have.

Yeah, I acted on impulse, but I owned up and apologized

Posted by BLVCKisBVCK

Posted by MonaLisa26

Posted by BLVCKisBVCK

I don't know why you're feeling bad about this. You gave him 2 opportunities to reply to you and he didn't take them.. It took him a month to finally say something and he only did so cause he noticed you unfriended him. You said you were wrting him a note as to not leave him in the dark.. well he had already left you in the dark so he didn't deserve that. He didn't make time for you in an entire month. That spakes volumes. I think you were wise to unfriend him, he isn't acting like a friend or someone who cares.

WHY is it necessary to unfriend? WHY not to just leave it as is? Unfriending seems like throwing temper tantrum.

While having decade of life changing I had not communicated with my childhood friends because they couldnt help me from Europe and I didnt want them to see me weak. I didnt feel like living, more less talking...

Then we got back together. No questions. No hurt feelings. If you are a friend - be a friend.

I never said it was necessary, I just said I don't think she was wrong to do that. Everyone copes with things differently. Out of sight out of mind works for a lot of people. And by the sounds of it, this dude wasn't just some random friend.. it was someone she had romantic interest in. That's kind of different than childhood friends. I can't answer why because different things work for different people.

But there are a lot of reasons someone may unfriend a person instead of just leaving it as it is. For instance, when I got into a relationship I unfriended random dudes who added me from Tinder to make my partner feel comfortable. He didn't ask me to, I just thought it was a respectful thing to do.

click to expand

This ^ also the fact I tried muting, but I kept looking so another reason I did it is to have space to get over him so I’m not tempted to look at his stories without blocking him

Unfortunately, he never defined what we are so this adds more stress why I unfriended because he already has me on a string 😒

Posted by alexscaries

Posted by WarEternal

Posted by LaLueur

Get everything out that you have to tell him. You're way too nice,is easy to see.

What's your sign. Libra ? Pisces? And what's his sign?

Ironically, I am an Aries but it could be of my Mars in Pisces. I suppose when dealing with someone I like, I try to gentle, but the Aries will come out if the injustice seeps through

He’s a Pisces man - ever so eluding

I think the venus is more important in relationships.

click to expand

We’re both Venus in Aries ♈️

Posted by MonaLisa26

Posted by BLVCKisBVCK

Posted by MonaLisa26

Posted by BLVCKisBVCK

I don't know why you're feeling bad about this. You gave him 2 opportunities to reply to you and he didn't take them.. It took him a month to finally say something and he only did so cause he noticed you unfriended him. You said you were wrting him a note as to not leave him in the dark.. well he had already left you in the dark so he didn't deserve that. He didn't make time for you in an entire month. That spakes volumes. I think you were wise to unfriend him, he isn't acting like a friend or someone who cares.

WHY is it necessary to unfriend? WHY not to just leave it as is? Unfriending seems like throwing temper tantrum.

While having decade of life changing I had not communicated with my childhood friends because they couldnt help me from Europe and I didnt want them to see me weak. I didnt feel like living, more less talking...

Then we got back together. No questions. No hurt feelings. If you are a friend - be a friend.

I never said it was necessary, I just said I don't think she was wrong to do that. Everyone copes with things differently. Out of sight out of mind works for a lot of people. And by the sounds of it, this dude wasn't just some random friend.. it was someone she had romantic interest in. That's kind of different than childhood friends. I can't answer why because different things work for different people.

But there are a lot of reasons someone may unfriend a person instead of just leaving it as it is. For instance, when I got into a relationship I unfriended random dudes who added me from Tinder to make my partner feel comfortable. He didn't ask me to, I just thought it was a respectful thing to do.

It is even worse than if he was just a friend. If she had romantic interest in him it means he didnt and unfriending a 'friend' for not wanting your body is simply childish. Man probably struggled not to be able to take her out. It is heartless. Fuck it...this story is a drag...

click to expand

LOL what? I do see him as a friend and we crushed on each other. Just the Pisces doesn’t know what he wants it seems

Posted by MonaLisa26

Posted by WarEternal

Posted by MonaLisa26

Posted by BLVCKisBVCK

I don't know why you're feeling bad about this. You gave him 2 opportunities to reply to you and he didn't take them.. It took him a month to finally say something and he only did so cause he noticed you unfriended him. You said you were wrting him a note as to not leave him in the dark.. well he had already left you in the dark so he didn't deserve that. He didn't make time for you in an entire month. That spakes volumes. I think you were wise to unfriend him, he isn't acting like a friend or someone who cares.

WHY is it necessary to unfriend? WHY not to just leave it as is? Unfriending seems like throwing temper tantrum.

While having decade of life changing I had not communicated with my childhood friends because they couldnt help me from Europe and I didnt want them to see me weak. I didnt feel like living, more less talking...

Then we got back together. No questions. No hurt feelings. If you are a friend - be a friend.

Because I was ignored when I needed him and seeing him continue to interact online without getting back to me to something important is negligent. It’s been a thing for awhile, but I’ve made exceptions that I shouldn’t have.

Yeah, I acted on impulse, but I owned up and apologized

You made up non existent relationship. You saw him not having your back and giving no crap about you...BUT you continued to hope (he didnt give you) for another month...YOU played game YOU created. He lived his life. Then you wanted his attention STILL so you unfriended him...

So basically you made a fool out of yourself. And more fool when unfriended. Now he is a bad guy...how typical.

click to expand

Hm no, there’s no game. I genuinely cared for him as a friend. It just escalated. I’m usually pretty patient, but I’m honestly exhausted having to keep trying

It was emotionally reactive of me which is you’re right, foolish, but it doesn’t take away how I felt

He created this because I wanted to be friends initially and he pushed my boundaries to convince me that it could be more so yeah, he’s in the wrong :/

Posted by BLVCKisBVCK

Posted by MonaLisa26

Posted by BLVCKisBVCK

Posted by MonaLisa26

Posted by WarEternal

Posted by MonaLisa26

Posted by BLVCKisBVCK

I don't know why you're feeling bad about this. You gave him 2 opportunities to reply to you and he didn't take them.. It took him a month to finally say something and he only did so cause he noticed you unfriended him. You said you were wrting him a note as to not leave him in the dark.. well he had already left you in the dark so he didn't deserve that. He didn't make time for you in an entire month. That spakes volumes. I think you were wise to unfriend him, he isn't acting like a friend or someone who cares.

WHY is it necessary to unfriend? WHY not to just leave it as is? Unfriending seems like throwing temper tantrum.

While having decade of life changing I had not communicated with my childhood friends because they couldnt help me from Europe and I didnt want them to see me weak. I didnt feel like living, more less talking...

Then we got back together. No questions. No hurt feelings. If you are a friend - be a friend.

Because I was ignored when I needed him and seeing him continue to interact online without getting back to me to something important is negligent. It’s been a thing for awhile, but I’ve made exceptions that I shouldn’t have.

Yeah, I acted on impulse, but I owned up and apologized

You made up non existent relationship. You saw him not having your back and giving no crap about you...BUT you continued to hope (he didnt give you) for another month...YOU played game YOU created. He lived his life. Then you wanted his attention STILL so you unfriended him...

So basically you made a fool out of yourself. And more fool when unfriended. Now he is a bad guy...how typical.

Are you a complete idiot??

Unfriending someone ends the attention you get from them.. it means you give up on it. He didn't reciprocate so why would she leave him on her socail media? You just shat on her for having hope, yet you call her a fool when she realizes and gives up.

I am stunned by your cluelessness. No time wasting on this one. Pointless.

Well which is it? If she leaves him as a friend then you're gonna say she still being hopeful. If she deletes him then she's a fool. You're the only clueless one here.

click to expand

Can’t talk with stupid, just let it be with this one 🙂 I appreciate your support!