Most Embarrassing Moment

My most embarrassing moment was when my boyfriend came to visit me and I had to pass gas. For some reason, I was always gassy around him.

This time the gas was incessant so I left the bedroom and was running back and forth to the bathroom. This was awkward enough and after a while, I got tired of going all the way in there.

The kitchen was adjacent to my bedroom so I went in there to let the air escape. I didn't want him to hear so I pulled my cheeks apart so that the air could easily escape. I did this a couple of times.

Upon returning to the bedroom on the last gascapage, I sat on the bed only to realize that the full length mirror in the hallway was in direct view of where I had released the pressure.

In other words, he saw me pulling my cheeks apart. HOT MESS!

What is your most embarrassing moment?

jesus mary and joseph jason! i didn't say your most DEPRESSING moment. my gawd man!

you make me sad sometimes

That's why I avoid the middle man and just break wind in front of them. If they stick around they're a keeper. If they laugh uproariously ( like I would be doing ) it's a lock. Turning it into a competition is just a perk.
One of my most embarrassing moments. My sister and I were at the pharmacy looking over the beauty aisle. I felt the rumble in the jungle and leaned over and whispered to her "I have to fart". Her in typical Leo fashion said "So effing fart."
Me, thinking I'm being crafty and internally noting that this will just be a ladylike breeze from my nether regions lock down and let fly. Only it wasn't small, and definitely not in the ladylike guidebook ( which is pastel pink if you must know ). As a matter of fact it was so loud the pharmacist leaned OVER the counter to peer through the store to find the offender with a dismayed look on his face. I turn bright red, my sisters evil laughter ringing in my ears we exit the store. Where we both proceeded to laugh till we cried.

I once killed the wrong person very embarressing

LOL!!! That's GREAT.

lol@venus...now that's why i was holdin my cheeks.

tate, shut up

Posted by tubbyscubby
My most embarrassing moment was when my boyfriend came to visit me and I had to pass gas. For some reason, I was always gassy around him.

This time the gas was incessant so I left the bedroom and was running back and forth to the bathroom. This was awkward enough and after a while, I got tired of going all the way in there.

The kitchen was adjacent to my bedroom so I went in there to let the air escape. I didn't want him to hear so I pulled my cheeks apart so that the air could easily escape. I did this a couple of times.

Upon returning to the bedroom on the last gascapage, I sat on the bed only to realize that the full length mirror in the hallway was in direct view of where I had released the pressure.

In other words, he saw me pulling my cheeks apart. HOT MESS!

What is your most embarrassing moment?

😄 LOL!!! I'm wondering what was the look on his face -if any- when you returned to the bedroom?

lol@sue

ariesvita - you know, he didn't seem to acknowledge it. i have held this in for years...pun intended. every time i thought of it i'd feel this wave of embarrassment and begin laughing.

i could ask him if he remembers but eh...he probably won't. or maybe he will and that really will be embarrassing 🙂

in 5th grade we had a halloween costume parade. i dressed up as scary spice, and i had this super awesome zebra-print outfit that my mom made for me. about midway through our procession, i noticed i felt a bit of a breeze. i looked down and my entire right boob was out. everyone's parents had video cameras to capture their little stars in action.

it was a dark, dark moment.

but that's just one of many, i've had humiliating experiences SO MANY TIMES in my life that it's incredibly difficult to embarrass me these days.

LMAO @trifles

AA, why did u faint?

good pt eden. embarrassment that i've earned, i can deal with. but if folks mistake one thing for another or try to heap embarrassment or shame i don't deserve/have never felt upon me, that pisses me off.

I should probably be embarrassed at some point everyday. I say/do the DUMBEST shit on the regular...
But I don't really get embarrassed. I usually just think it's funny, and then later on down the road I'm like gawdddd why did I do/say that?

OMG Tub, don't think I can top that one! lol

Oh. One time I fell down a flight of steps in the subway during rush hour. That was pretty bad.

*standing up and applauding* Excellent work Sue. 🙂

Cripes MsP, were you alright?

Posted by venusianbull
*standing up and applauding* Excellent work Sue. 🙂

Cripes MsP, were you alright?

Yes, thankfully!

Whew! My first reaction would have been to check on you to make sure.

Posted by fourthwallbreaker

Posted by MsPisces.
Oh. One time I fell down a flight of steps in the subway during rush hour. That was pretty bad.

heheh, did you proper go flying ?
hehe (mentally is sounds quite chuckleworthy) 🙂

click to expand

I slid down the entire flight on my ass lol The staircase was packed, mind you! Everyone was like 'oh shit, are you okay!!'(while trying to hold back the laughter). I didn't even respond. As soon as I landed, I got up and ran out of the station lol

Posted by satori
i constantly embarass myself whenever I'm in social settings.

when I turned 20 I rented a place and threw myself a party (lame, I know) and invited 20+ people and it turned out to be soo boring and awkward. Some people left, some were nice and stayed for a little while but it was all-around just a totally humiliating experience. I just don't know how to get a party started.

Also, I started this book club about Politics and Religion because I am deeply interested in those subjects. Hardly anyone came to the meetings and those who did were nice but I could tell that they were dissapointed by my lack of knowledge on the subjects and poor speaking skills. I couldn't wait for the book to be over.. I still look back on it and cringe.

I'm just better at one-on-one interactions. or if I'm in a social setting and there are people who are less shy than myself that helps me to open up.

Aww lol

Those people suck for counting on you to solely make the book club and party happen! 😉

Okay, here's one:

In grade school, we had this great coach for gym who would select the teams himself to ensure that they were physically balanced. (This was great since I'm not athletic at all.) Well, one day I got to gym class late because of an appointment and he had already paired up people. He said, "Okay, let me find a girl who doesn't have a partner yet." The only girl that was available was a big, hefty girl; I'm short and small. We were terribly mismatched. The task was for us to do the "wheelbarrow" to one end of the gym and back and then switch. Next thing I know, the coach blows the whistle and says, "GO!" and my legs are lifted way up in the air and I'm struggling to keep my head off the gym floor and keep from kissing it since she was really rushing me. Somehow we make it to the end of the gym and back. Then it was my turn to lift her legs: she was being very squirmy and bossy, "Come on, grab my legs!" Needless to say, we came in last and everybody was looking and laughing at us.

I kissed that gym floor more than I care to remember.

In 1978, I walked into a 7-11 (convenience store for those who don't have 7-11 stores) ....... around noon, very busy, packed with people.


And there stood my first husband (Gemini) ... he wasnt' facing me, but, still I know my husband's ass .. oh yes, I grabbed it, and much more did I grab from behind.




Nearly pissed myself when a complete stranger turned around and politely asked me to let go of his cock.

butt most embarassing moment-

Met her had sum drinks we head 2 my place,start goin at it when I pull out 2 far and my dick cumes out of her ass. I kinda scrambeld 2 grab and put it back in so I coud finnish off, but before I coud even git a hold, I herd a faint "psssst" sound and felt sumthing wet and warm hit my crotch.

after I look down it took me a few seconds 2 relize that my dick, balls and groin area were covered in a viscous black liquid. I stoped moving and starred at my strangely colored crotch for a good 5 seconds, completly confused, un til I relized wat had hapened..

"did you...did you jus...shit on my dick??"

I reached down 2 tuch the liquid feces, still in complete and utter disbeleif that this girl shot explosive diarhea on my penis, when, without warning, the smell hit me.

I tried 2 hold it back. I relly did everything I coud 2 stop myself, but their are certain physical reactions that are beyond conscious control. before I knew wat I was doing, it jus cam out:

"BBBBBBLLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

I had vomited all over her ass. Into her crack. Into her asshole. On her ass cheeks. On the small of her back. Everywear.

she turned her head, saw me vomiting on her, and immediately joined me

"BBBBBBLLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

watching her throwup on my bed made me vomit even more,

athis point she tried 2 stand up, slipped on the huge puddle of backflow astroglide on the bed, and fell into both my pile and her pile of vomit, covering her body and hair in vomit, shit and anal lubricint. she flailed on the bed for a second, grabbed the top sheet, wrapped it around her, and started running out of my place. still naked and retching, my dick covered in shit and oil, I followed her as far as the front door..

the last contact I ever had with her is the image I witnesed of her in a dead sprint, a shit, vomit and greese stained sheet stuck 2 her body, running from my apartmint.

OH SHIT!

LMAO!!!!

now that is the best evah!!!!

sounds real to me.

she was drunk, she had loose bowels, she pooped, he puked, she puked...works for me.

back in college my gf and i traded shots of southern comfort with two dudes. i think we ended up taking like 15 shots each...beating the guys. well, she gets up "for some air." her bf follows her out. he comes rushing back in and says, she's outside your apartment puking in the bushes, where's her things i'm taking her home.

so i get up, wasted, stumble over to my apartment which they pretty much broke into. go into the bathroom and there she is pukin in the toilet. the SOUND of her vomiting made me vomit right there. didn't reach for a can or puke over the sink...just the SOUND was enough to make all that so co come up. was a gross night.

oh booooooooooooooooooo! it didn't happen to you 😛

Posted by satori
But I have heard that that can happen during anal sex, drunk or not.

this is why you make sure all lanes are clear

i dunno prince. repeated trauma to that region loosens the sphincter muscles can result in regular seepage. plus, if a person has loose bowels, is fuqd up beyond belief, shit happens...literally. so the story may be false but i'm sure it has happened before...although probably less dramatic.

@satori, uhm...i dunno if you have to go so far as an enema but i definitely wouldn't want to be backed up before. pushing it back up or farting excessively after...yuck.

and i didn't like it much either until i realized the worst position is lying on your stomach and doggy style is 😛

if you attempt again, once he's entered and your body has relaxed, try positioning yourself so that he's standing behind you and that you're practically grabbing your ankles.

some women can O from anal and i think it's that position that will get you there.

^^^ditto. it's like having loosened vaginal muscles after giving birth only there's no such thing as anal kegels.

not true prince. it depends on the level of "trauma."

if someone's poop is hard and in a mass that's too large, they might have to have it extracted manually.

if a dude is too large, shit happens and can break stuff back there.

UGH! i am now reminded of a vid that a friend sent me where this guy was being fisted. it was the most disturbing thing i'd ever seen in my entire life. i think the guy went in almost to his elbow. it looked so painful.

prince, who's to say that she/he doesn't have loose bowels?

prince, men are the only ones with anuses 😉

TOC - you sawed it? OMG! it was so disturbingly mesmerizing.

Posted by Prince_Pisces
I have a question though. . .how do women enjoy being fucked in the ass? cause they dont have the whole g-spot in the ass thing. im asking cause my leo friend told me she prefers anal over vaginal. . . .lol.

it's the angle. that why i think you have to be standing and virtually touching your ankles for the wee to be positioned correctly for a woman to get pleasure from it...speaking from personal experience that is.

TOC, maybe later. right now i'm in a good mood.

ok...NO!

from yahoo answers...

"Blue Waffle is a vaginal disease and the term should not be confused with the quick drying towels that are used to dry and wipe cars and other vehicles. The disease causes a very dirty condition of vagina of females and a continuous smelly discharge flows from the vagina. The whole vaginal part becomes torn and cracking of skin appears in the area surrounding the vagina. The disease spreads to the anus also and causes a painful sensation in the body. The inflammation of the vagina also occurs making it very painful and unbearable for the affected woman. The disease is mainly seen in prostitutes and whores who indulge in excessive sexual activities. Unsafe sex, use of sex toys and prostitution are the major causes of this disease. In medical terms, Blue Waffle disease is defined as battered or infected lady cake of blue or green coloring, often brought about by extreme damage to the female vagina with penis or device of similar nature "

hell no, no no no...won't scar myself for life.

TOC - you need therapy. ironically, it was a libra who sent me one of the worst vids evah! was a long time ago but for years, i couldn't get the image out of my head. she didn't warn me, just sent out the email and the vid started right up. and there was the dog and the woman....nuff said.

i was and still am PISSED! about it.

well i have an almost photographic memory so things literally stay with me a lot longer than most. made studying easy in school but when it comes to sick shit...UGH!

I has a super secrety secret for you AA. Lean down so you can hear me, I'm a bit shorter than you are. *whispering* Girls fart. It's true. Trust no one.

HELL YES. And those aren't farts, they're ''love puffs''. A gift, as it were. 😉

groooooooooooooooooss!

i'm with AA, women don't have anuses.

correction, we have anuses but nothing is expelled from them.

we don't pee either.

nor do we spit.

LOL Farts are hilarious. Always have been, always will be. Now I wanna skip rope and ride my bike. 😄

I was in a store with my ex picking up depends for my gram. I asked him to go get them while I looked at the makeup. He had picked them up before...he knew the routine. Only this time he comes walking back to me carrying them like an 80's style boombox. 2 packs...one on each shoulder. Saying "Babe, we should just stock up so we don't have to come every week"

I'm with tubby....girls dont fart 😄 I lean forward when I pee so it doesn't hit the water and make the tinkle sound. I'm bashful :X

i wish i could think of some of my other ones, but it appears i've blocked the majority from my memory so as to avoid permanent trauma.

for my family, thanksgiving dinners are a huge thing. they include extensions of extended family, which equates to, you're stuck at a table with people you never see but who know very well who you are. so here i am sitting at a table with a bunch of my relatives whom i rarely see, and someone cracks a hilarious joke pertaining to double-dipping and abe lincoln because someone had just double-dipped. EVERYONE at the table started laughing hysterically, and when i burst out laughing, unfortunately a loud fart burst out as well.

which, of course, was succeeded by utter silence and everyone looking around trying to figure out who the culprit was. and when they saw my red face, they burst out laughing a second time, even harder than before if possible.

oh, just remembered another. once, i was at a friend's in the summer and we decided it would be fun to set up some competitions. one of them was a relay race. when i got the baton, i started sprinting as fast as i could because i didn't want to let my team down. unfortunately, i believe i ran a bit too fast, because i tripped and landed directly in a pile of dog shit. it was all over the leg of my jeans.

i tried to wash it out using dish soap, hand soap, and laundry detergent, but all of my attempts were essentially ineffective. and i had no other clothes with me. so i smelt like dog shit the whole day.

once when i had been drinking, one of my friends decided they wanted to take me for a ride on a quad. i realize this wasn't the smartest idea now of course, but at the time, i was super excited. however, quads aren't necessarily the easiest things to get onto when one is sober. so i stared at it for a minute (or two, laughing). when i finally decided on a course of action, i stepped down into a bit of a rut because it was parked on uneven ground, fell, and bounced my forehead square off the rear left tire. then, in the struggle to stand up, proceeded to stagger backward and lie in the grass.

there was no quad ride that evening.

(for me anyway)