Sex before marriage?

Obviously, there's 2 groups out there- people who believe in not having sex before marriage, and those who don't.

I had an interesting discussion/argument with a Bible thumping acquaintance today. He basically considers anyone who sleeps with someone, who is not their spouse, a person who's "sleeping around." Therefore, he believes they're sluts.

That's his thing, which is fine. I can totally understand if someone personally believes in waiting before marriage, but to go and peg everyone else a "slut" who doesn't do so? Seems a bit extreme. If you want to have your belief, fine. But to use such a derogatory term toward these individuals, especially women? (he's always been quick to look down on women and toss out derogatory terms toward them)

He even pulled out a reference to the Bible, to which I replied, "doesn't it also say not to judge others?" No response. Funny how that works...

It just seems a bit extreme to consider anyone, even those in committed relationships, who are also not married, a slut. By those standards, a huge portion of the population would be considered "slutty," despite being monogamous and in a relationship. When I hear "slut," I'm thinking of the chick who's banging any guy down at the club every weekend. Not someone who's in a committed relationship. It just seems weird to me to think like that.

I guess I'm just writing here because I was curious to see what others' ideas are on sex before marriage. I know of types who just want to wait and that's that. But I guess I've just never considered someone projecting THAT extreme of an outlook on others. Maybe I just haven't heard someone refer to others as "sluts" for doing so who were also in relationships.

No sex before marriage, your choice, no? If it is your choice, do you necessarily think badly of others if they choose not to wait? Even if I was a firm believer in no sex before marriage, those who chose not to... well that's their choice. They have to deal with any potential consequences and what not.

I can't really formulate the question that's coming to mind, but I figured I'd start a discussion of differing opinions anyway. This got me thinking about it and I was curious what others thought on the subject.

In my opinion, any person who marries without finding out if you are sexually compatible is an utter fool.

I'm not a Christian but I do know some sayings - "judge ye not"

I believe, that nobody should judge anybody. I simply dont like calling anyone slut or even for that matter I dont like calling someone "good girl" just because she doesnt sleep with people unless she's committed/married to someone.

I believe sex is something deeply personal to everyone..and one shouldnt judge any other person's personal life. Hence, no - I am utterly against calling someone whore just because she slept with people to fulfill her sexual needs which is the most natural thing for every human.


That being said - I, personally, dont believe in having sex before marriage. To me, sex is something that is extremely personal...so, I cannot sleep with anyone unless I am completely in love with the other person and because I dont think I wouldn't take a relationship further unless the guy I'm in love with marries me, I wont have sex untill I'm married.(havent been in love, yet, just 18 years old). It's impossible for me to think of making love to anyone without being in love with them. I simply cannot pursue any sexual relationship until I am madly in love. For me, sex, apart from being just physical.. it's more emotional, metaphysical, something where two souls merge lol -- which happens only when two people are in love. I feel it happens more naturally when in love.


I wonder if such views on sex is due to my birthchart ?

Aries Sun
Scorpio moon
Pisces mercury
Aries Venus
Pisces MARS!

THREE GROUPS
SEX BEFORE MARRAGE
NO SEX BEFORE MARRAGE
NO SEX AFTER MARRAGE

I wish I would have waited and I will tell you why.

I believe in soul ties. That is when a persons soul is tied to yours through intimacy. I think I have all these soul ties with my ex boyfriends and FWBs I want them gone. I even googled "how to get rid of soul ties". Have you ever felt like something was wrong and yet nothing was? It's because something is wrong with someone you have a soul tie to or you feel tired and run down. Your soul tie is sick. Whatever they are going through is someone transplanted to you.

Also, if you lack experience with sex then you do not have all these memories to compare it to. It's really not fair to the other person to think "well Sara used to do it like this or John use to make me feel like this" it's really horrible. I wish I could rip those memories out of my brain. Its clouds my judgement and makes me make horrible choices. I am attracted to the physical and I so wish I wasn't. I have let many a good man go because he wasn't tall dark and handsome. Its' pitiful. It really is.

Next, If you believe in God, the Universe or a Higher Power and you truly send out positive energies, then you are going to receive exactly what you need sexually and otherwise. The problem arises when YOU think you know what you need as opposed to trusting in something bigger than you. I don't believe you would receive someone you are not sexually compatiable with. How long and often are you having sex anyway? Maybe 2 hours total per week. I am talking about long term relationships not the new ones where you feel like rabbits.

I know 2 people (not really my friends) but they waited until marriage. Everytime I see them it's like they have a special glow. You would really have to see them to know what I am talking about. It's like they are different (in a good way)

Yep. I have a similar situation to Capgirl.

If the sex ain't good, there's no use continuing the relationship!

Of course, I am a Christian and believe you should wait until the relationship is on solid ground, but I'm also human and sex is very important to the relationship (I have Scorp venus, by the way).

there was no way i was getting married before we (my husband and I) did the dirrrrtty deed. if we were not sexually compatible, mentally, emotionally, etcetera.
but everyone has their views. not knocking those who want to keep it locked up tight before the vows.

What I find really hilarious about this thread, about the subject matter ...... is that in every instance that the bible speaks of marriage, it is actually referencing fucking.


so there is no marriage before sex, since sex is described as being married ... that is, if you decide to take the bible for what it says, rather than what you are told it says.


go read it ..... if a man fucks a woman, then she becomes one of wives by virtue of the very act




lol, but, that's too real for people, I know ..

Damn right.

Posted by Prince_Pisces

.... that whole 'Im saving myself for marriage' is usually code for 'im too ugly to get any dick/pussy, so im gonna pretend its my choice'

hahahaha

They look like they're trying to eat eachother...

LOL