Ownard
@Ownard
8 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 293 · Topics: 30
How can I stop my confidence becoming arrogance?
Posted by TomSawyerThanks, I'll take that into consideration. Nah, he's a guy, although he is pretty feminine.
You don't.
If confidence/arrogance is new to you, you should go through both in order to learn how to balance them and when to get arrogant/when to hide it.
You can start experimenting i.e. shifting confidence to arrogance and see how people react.
By the reactions you can determine what's what.
Offtopic - your close friend wouldn't happen to be a woman?
You can't but there are some tricks to deflect and make people think you are more humble.
Don't talk about yourself in conversations. Just listen and ask questions.
I feel like you don't have to change anything else.
Don't talk about yourself in conversations. Just listen and ask questions.
I feel like you don't have to change anything else.
Confidence comes with a health dose of humility.
Confidence focuses on the Self as an acting force on the world, not taking the actions of others into account.
Confidence is knowing that you are valid within yourself, but still have room to grow.
Confidence is knowing that you DON'T know everything and seek out the knowledge of others to bolster your own.
Check yourself.
You seem to have a external locus of control- meaning that you believe that the actions of others hinder your life experiences instead of accepting responsibility yourself, or knowing that nothing could have been done to prevent "it" in the first place.
Your arrogance is coming from bitterness, your drive to be better than those who "made" you fall to your lowest. Use the awareness you show here towards losing that arrogance.
Your friend seems to care about you greatly, ask them for help/advice.
Confidence focuses on the Self as an acting force on the world, not taking the actions of others into account.
Confidence is knowing that you are valid within yourself, but still have room to grow.
Confidence is knowing that you DON'T know everything and seek out the knowledge of others to bolster your own.
Check yourself.
You seem to have a external locus of control- meaning that you believe that the actions of others hinder your life experiences instead of accepting responsibility yourself, or knowing that nothing could have been done to prevent "it" in the first place.
Your arrogance is coming from bitterness, your drive to be better than those who "made" you fall to your lowest. Use the awareness you show here towards losing that arrogance.
Your friend seems to care about you greatly, ask them for help/advice.
Definition of arrogance for English Language Learners
: an insulting way of thinking or behaving that comes from believing that you are better, smarter, or more important than other people
versus confidence,
the quality of being certain of your abilities or of having trust in people, plans, or the future:
[ + to infinitive ] He has the confidence to walk into a room of strangers and immediately start a conversation.
She's completely lacking in confidence.
I have every/complete confidence in her. She'll be perfect for the job.
[ + that ] I don't share your confidence that the market will improve next year.
More examples
She's certainly gained (in) confidence over the last couple of years.
After six defeats in a row, the team's confidence has been badly shaken.
The government is trying to restore public confidence in its management of the economy.
Passing my driving test was such a boost to my confidence.
I don't have much confidence in him after his behaviour in recent months.
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/confidence
alot of us have lack of confidence. for example, i lack confidence in areas of life,
abilities,
but if youre confident in something, you are humble about it and keep quiet, a quiet strength.
like what the meanings above mean,
you walk into a room and you can command a presence, that's confidence.
you dont have to say anything.
or if you make a speech you are confident in your abilities,
for example, JFKennedy making that famous speech,
he was very confident and people clapped and roared.
if you lack confidence in approaching a woman for a date,
that's your insecurity and fear.
you are afraid of rejection.
we all have that, alot of us,
that's a beta trait people would say.
if you get shot down and rejected,
it's ok, just move on but the fear is debilitating.
i think what people are talking about that arrogance is from bitterness, is just angry at the world.
angry that people aren't who they want them to be, angry at life, so they rage at the imperfections.
: an insulting way of thinking or behaving that comes from believing that you are better, smarter, or more important than other people
versus confidence,
the quality of being certain of your abilities or of having trust in people, plans, or the future:
[ + to infinitive ] He has the confidence to walk into a room of strangers and immediately start a conversation.
She's completely lacking in confidence.
I have every/complete confidence in her. She'll be perfect for the job.
[ + that ] I don't share your confidence that the market will improve next year.
More examples
She's certainly gained (in) confidence over the last couple of years.
After six defeats in a row, the team's confidence has been badly shaken.
The government is trying to restore public confidence in its management of the economy.
Passing my driving test was such a boost to my confidence.
I don't have much confidence in him after his behaviour in recent months.
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/confidence
alot of us have lack of confidence. for example, i lack confidence in areas of life,
abilities,
but if youre confident in something, you are humble about it and keep quiet, a quiet strength.
like what the meanings above mean,
you walk into a room and you can command a presence, that's confidence.
you dont have to say anything.
or if you make a speech you are confident in your abilities,
for example, JFKennedy making that famous speech,
he was very confident and people clapped and roared.
if you lack confidence in approaching a woman for a date,
that's your insecurity and fear.
you are afraid of rejection.
we all have that, alot of us,
that's a beta trait people would say.
if you get shot down and rejected,
it's ok, just move on but the fear is debilitating.
i think what people are talking about that arrogance is from bitterness, is just angry at the world.
angry that people aren't who they want them to be, angry at life, so they rage at the imperfections.
Posted by OwnardThere is a line between confidence and arrogance but it's up to you whether you think you have acted inappropriately. If you feel like you are a good person, it shouldn't matter what other people think. Being proud of yourself is one thing, but be humble about it. Use your new talent to help others. I think the difference between a lot of people are their motivations. So many have very selfish motivations and I think that's what makes me think someone is arrogant... they put on that "I'm better than everyone" coat and think it was made for them. Arrogance is one of my bugaboos but it's a difficult aspect for me to explain.
Hey there,
I have been working pretty hard since new year's to build myself a positive life style and attitude, and one of my main goals is to build up my confidence and self esteem.
I recently had a chat with my closest friend about people changing and he said I haven't changed for the better. He told me that I have lost my kindness and become arrogant. I disputed the kindness part as many people I meet and a day to day basis say I am kind, but I conceded the arrogance point. I have indeed noticed some time where I have been but it made me think is there times where I haven't noticed.
I think that it is caused through me funneling my negative emotions into improving myself. Over the past couple of years, many people who used to be in my life have sent me into a downwards spiral after incidents with them. The most recent one I was determined not to and started on an upwards spiral but they, being used to people going into a downwards spiral after they leave her life, keeps try to send me down that way, so I channeled my negative emotions I felt towards them into my goal of improving my confidence.
The question is, how can I stop my confidence that I am trying to build becoming arrogance? Have I already hit the nail on the head or are there other things that are making me arrogant?
-Ownard
Posted by PandalaI would ask him for advice but he's going through a lot right now, that is why I am here.
Confidence comes with a health dose of humility.
Confidence focuses on the Self as an acting force on the world, not taking the actions of others into account.
Confidence is knowing that you are valid within yourself, but still have room to grow.
Confidence is knowing that you DON'T know everything and seek out the knowledge of others to bolster your own.
Check yourself.
You seem to have a external locus of control- meaning that you believe that the actions of others hinder your life experiences instead of accepting responsibility yourself, or knowing that nothing could have been done to prevent "it" in the first place.
Your arrogance is coming from bitterness, your drive to be better than those who "made" you fall to your lowest. Use the awareness you show here towards losing that arrogance.
Your friend seems to care about you greatly, ask them for help/advice.
How do you think I should proceed in more practical, day to day way?
Posted by ImpulsvI wouldn't like to think he would be like that, since he is my closest friend, but I will ask a few others I trust just to make sure.
I would it based it on one person maybe he’s jealous of your new found confidence
Posted by CheesecakeThe last few sentences is what I had aimed to achieve but it appears I have reached the arrogant stage you mentioned.
I used to be very insecure, and then I had one of those "the universe does in fact revolve around my balls" moments. I became cocky and arrogant. It worked for a while. Everyone thought that I was extraordinary in some way without ever having to prove it.
Until I met less fortunate people who could do extraordinary and simple things that I can't do. Arrogance is a defense. Confidence is an impression. Ignore them both. Forever keep working on your capacity and capability. Always keep pushing yourself. Respect everyone. Be humble.
Posted by AbbyNormalI'm as of yet unsure if I have acted inappropriately, I just want to make sure I am keeping my confidence from becoming arrogance.Posted by OwnardThere is a line between confidence and arrogance but it's up to you whether you think you have acted inappropriately. If you feel like you are a good person, it shouldn't matter what other people think. Being proud of yourself is one thing, but be humble about it. Use your new talent to help others. I think the difference between a lot of people are their motivations. So many have very selfish motivations and I think that's what makes me think someone is arrogant... they put on that "I'm better than everyone" coat and think it was made for them. Arrogance is one of my bugaboos but it's a difficult aspect for me to explain.
Hey there,
I have been working pretty hard since new year's to build myself a positive life style and attitude, and one of my main goals is to build up my confidence and self esteem.
I recently had a chat with my closest friend about people changing and he said I haven't changed for the better. He told me that I have lost my kindness and become arrogant. I disputed the kindness part as many people I meet and a day to day basis say I am kind, but I conceded the arrogance point. I have indeed noticed some time where I have been but it made me think is there times where I haven't noticed.
I think that it is caused through me funneling my negative emotions into improving myself. Over the past couple of years, many people who used to be in my life have sent me into a downwards spiral after incidents with them. The most recent one I was determined not to and started on an upwards spiral but they, being used to people going into a downwards spiral after they leave her life, keeps try to send me down that way, so I channeled my negative emotions I felt towards them into my goal of improving my confidence.
The question is, how can I stop my confidence that I am trying to build becoming arrogance? Have I already hit the nail on the head or are there other things that are making me arrogant?
-Ownardclick to expand
What I normally see it’s that people that are arrogant they behave like that because they think they are better than others.
Having your feet in the ground for me it’s to realize that you are not better than anyone else. Everyone should be respected it doesn’t matter who they are or what job they do.
I find it difficult sometimes and I try not to be arrogant. It’s a work in process. No one it’s perfect.
Sometimes it’s difficult when your work makes you feel superior to other people. Like people around you encourage that behavior.
Having your feet in the ground for me it’s to realize that you are not better than anyone else. Everyone should be respected it doesn’t matter who they are or what job they do.
I find it difficult sometimes and I try not to be arrogant. It’s a work in process. No one it’s perfect.
Sometimes it’s difficult when your work makes you feel superior to other people. Like people around you encourage that behavior.
Posted by OwnardBeing mindful of the two is half the battle! I think you're doing ok... 😉Posted by AbbyNormalI'm as of yet unsure if I have acted inappropriately, I just want to make sure I am keeping my confidence from becoming arrogance.Posted by OwnardThere is a line between confidence and arrogance but it's up to you whether you think you have acted inappropriately. If you feel like you are a good person, it shouldn't matter what other people think. Being proud of yourself is one thing, but be humble about it. Use your new talent to help others. I think the difference between a lot of people are their motivations. So many have very selfish motivations and I think that's what makes me think someone is arrogant... they put on that "I'm better than everyone" coat and think it was made for them. Arrogance is one of my bugaboos but it's a difficult aspect for me to explain.
Hey there,
I have been working pretty hard since new year's to build myself a positive life style and attitude, and one of my main goals is to build up my confidence and self esteem.
I recently had a chat with my closest friend about people changing and he said I haven't changed for the better. He told me that I have lost my kindness and become arrogant. I disputed the kindness part as many people I meet and a day to day basis say I am kind, but I conceded the arrogance point. I have indeed noticed some time where I have been but it made me think is there times where I haven't noticed.
I think that it is caused through me funneling my negative emotions into improving myself. Over the past couple of years, many people who used to be in my life have sent me into a downwards spiral after incidents with them. The most recent one I was determined not to and started on an upwards spiral but they, being used to people going into a downwards spiral after they leave her life, keeps try to send me down that way, so I channeled my negative emotions I felt towards them into my goal of improving my confidence.
The question is, how can I stop my confidence that I am trying to build becoming arrogance? Have I already hit the nail on the head or are there other things that are making me arrogant?
-Ownardclick to expand
Posted by OwnardPosted by PandalaI would ask him for advice but he's going through a lot right now, that is why I am here.
Confidence comes with a health dose of humility.
Confidence focuses on the Self as an acting force on the world, not taking the actions of others into account.
Confidence is knowing that you are valid within yourself, but still have room to grow.
Confidence is knowing that you DON'T know everything and seek out the knowledge of others to bolster your own.
Check yourself.
You seem to have a external locus of control- meaning that you believe that the actions of others hinder your life experiences instead of accepting responsibility yourself, or knowing that nothing could have been done to prevent "it" in the first place.
Your arrogance is coming from bitterness, your drive to be better than those who "made" you fall to your lowest. Use the awareness you show here towards losing that arrogance.
Your friend seems to care about you greatly, ask them for help/advice.
How do you think I should proceed in more practical, day to day way?click to expand
You'll be surprised who'll help you if you just ask.
I would say just make sure to check yourself in a situation. Think before you speak, and make sure to read how a person took your response. Body language can be telling.
Posted by The_Mad_HatterPosted by pisceswoman123
What I normally see it’s that people that are arrogant they behave like that because they think they are better than others.
Having your feet in the ground for me it’s to realize that you are not better than anyone else. Everyone should be respected it doesn’t matter who they are or what job they do.
I find it difficult sometimes and I try not to be arrogant. It’s a work in process. No one it’s perfect.
Sometimes it’s difficult when your work makes you feel superior to other people. Like people around you encourage that behavior.
That is the difficult part; to be mindful that not everyone has had the same opportunities you've had. Nor the same goals. You never know someone's background so never assume you do. Just treat everyone the same. Some of the poorest people I've met drive the flashiest cars and wear the nicest clothes, while some of the richest I've met wear plain clothes and are not flashy at all.
click to expand
Yes. That it’s what I mean by respecting everyone.
I know that very very well. Specially if they have class. The richest people I know they are very humble.
Normally people that they are flashy they are arrogant too, because they think that that it’s part of the package sometimes.
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I have been working pretty hard since new year's to build myself a positive life style and attitude, and one of my main goals is to build up my confidence and self esteem.
I recently had a chat with my closest friend about people changing and he said I haven't changed for the better. He told me that I have lost my kindness and become arrogant. I disputed the kindness part as many people I meet and a day to day basis say I am kind, but I conceded the arrogance point. I have indeed noticed some time where I have been but it made me think is there times where I haven't noticed.
I think that it is caused through me funneling my negative emotions into improving myself. Over the past couple of years, many people who used to be in my life have sent me into a downwards spiral after incidents with them. The most recent one I was determined not to and started on an upwards spiral but they, being used to people going into a downwards spiral after they leave her life, keeps try to send me down that way, so I channeled my negative emotions I felt towards them into my goal of improving my confidence.
The question is, how can I stop my confidence that I am trying to build becoming arrogance? Have I already hit the nail on the head or are there other things that are making me arrogant?
-Ownard