Do Pisces reappear after they have disappeared?

I am a 25 year old Sag and was dating a Pisces for 6 weeks. We spent every single day 2gether, never even had an argument, and were totally in sync. However, I know Pisces tend to live in a "fantasyworld", which is what he was doing. I work, am pursuing my Masters and all in all, I have a future. My Pisces didn't have a job and seemed really flighty - everytime someone asked him what he wanted to do - he gave all different answers...basically, he just seemed lost.

Anyway, I never pressured him or said anything for weeks because after all, he is a 25 year old man - he needs to make his own decisions. The r/s was great and he treated me like a queen. Then, his car broke down for the last time, and seeing as we live an hour away from eachother, I broke it off with him. I didn't want to but I just knew it wasn't going to work. He was very upset, but said he agreed since he didn't know when he was getting his life together and didn't want to waste my time.

But he said over and over again that he didn't want this to be final. He knew from previous conversations that I believe in no contact after break ups but asked me to "do him 1 favor". He said if I ever change my mind, just to call him.

Well the next morning, I changed my mind and called him. No answer. I was frantic thinking something happened to him, because there's no way the guy was couldn't even leave me at the end of the night was now ignoring me. Well, he was. As soon as I figured out for certain that he WAS in fact ignoring me, I stopped calling and haven't reached out since. It was 3 weeks ago.

He hurt me tremendously. I have no answers. I know we ended things and all, but his ignoring me after such a wonderful r/s is just odd. AND he repeatedly told me that he didn't want this to be final and he wanted to keep the door open. I started googling things on Pisces men (I have never dated a Pisces before) and everything I have read is him to a tee. It says Sag and Pisces never work because Sag has a sharp tongue (boy, do I!) and Pisces are ultra-sensitive. I think I probably said some things that hurt his feelings that night...I guess they were "harsh truths" for him and made him feel badly about how he's not doing anything with his life. I didn't insult him or put him down, but I have a feeling Pisces men don't like facing realities. I have also read that when Pisces seek solitude, to leave them be, which I have done now for 3 weeks and honestly will never call him ever again. Do P-men ever

return? I don't think I want him back, I just want to know why he just switched on me like that!

"He was very upset, but said he agreed since he didn't know when he was getting his life together and didn't want to waste my time."

This says alot .....I re-read again and honestly this is the only reason why. Sounds like he may be disappointed maybe even depressed because this is not going the way he would like. When the fish is in this state .....we can isolate as we sort through our disappointed and sad emotions. 😢 Honestly hon ...this says it all to me. I am starting to head into relations with a Scorpio who lives 50 miles away ....I worry about this all the time. It would make me sad if we ended. 😢 I would probably recluse. 😢 I won't even think about it though ......because it will work out and I will put the effort into the relationship.

NYbeauty ....and to answer your original question .....yes we always reappear ....lol ....I do this often. 😉

PD, thanks for replying. I miss him so bad it hurts and I just want to know why he ran. He ignored my calls/texts for those 2 days following the break-up and then I stopped contact completely. He was so loving, caring and understanding and then he just turned cold on me. I know he liked me - he even pushed to meet my family (which he did). My friends were beyond shocked he started ignoring me. They said, "no way, he's too crazy about you".

I just think he knows he has nothing to offer me right now...which I believe is true. I think we both kinda knew it was doomed from the start but both fell for eachother. Then the fantasy gave way to reality for him. I gave him an out, and he took it and ran.

I was different than the other girls he has dated (or so I thought). He's used to dating younger girls with addiction problems, who vandalize his car and go psycho, and that's not me at all. I'm mature, have my life together. I would bring his mother pastries when I went to his house. I always made sure he was fed, always told him how sexy he was, etc. It's just that night I snapped and basically said "what's your plan?". And that was it. He never even let me take it back. He just left.

I don't think he'll come back on his own. I think if I want him, I have to go get him, and truthfully, I'll never do that. He ignored me and completely shut me out. My dignity won't allow me to try again. Everyone said he'd be back but it's been 3 weeks.

Another part of me thinks he wants to see how far I'll go to get him. I have read Pisces men have low self-esteem (so true!).

Do P-men run hot and cold? I don't know how he could be so "normal" (including everyone saying what a good guy he was) and then just shut it off like that? It's hard to tell whether he has completely forgotten about me or if he was just hurt.

lol

so dude's car breaks down and you break up with him? and you're mad that he he isn't responding to you?

HA!

Cali, yeah I knew someone was going to say that. It wasn't that the car broke down. It was that the car was now DONE and with no job, it's kind of hard to get a new one...wouldn't you say?

I am pursuing my Master's and go to school 3 nights a week so now the burden was about to fall on him coming to see me more often and now he had no car. You can say I'm stuck up, believe me, I beat myself up for that, but it wasn't about that. His car had broken down before and I just smiled and said "I'll come to you." But now this was a different story.

And I don't know if he's still not talking to me. I haven't tried.

what is your sign?

you knew he didn't have a job and that he was in a transit phase. you chose to abandon this person at their lowest and that makes you a pretty fucked up individual.

he didn't answer? good for him.

Okay, so you made the best decision for you at the time, realizing that him not having a car/job would make a relationship with him very, very difficult right now. You'd only dated 6 weeks at that point, so why invest more time in a losing proposition? Fine, that's a practical decision - you're a strong woman, you know what you want and expect in a relationship. Kudos.

The thing is.. WHAT made you suddenly change your mind the very next day? He STILL didn't have a car or a job, he STILL didn't have his life together.. nothing changed... except to a Pisces (who are MUCH more reality-based and practical than some people give them credit for) that looks like YOU are the wishy-washy, flighty, back-and-forth one. It looks like YOU will bail when times get rough.. and boy times DO get rough! We Pisces don't like wasting time in losing propositions either, you know. And yes, he probably had some time to think about and consider all the things said during your breakup.. all the "practical" and "this isn't working" stuff you probably said.. and he realized 1) You're probably right and 2) He's not the man for you, esp not right now, with so little to offer you that a hardship like a car breaking down would send you running in the opposite direction. and 3) That means you're not good for each other, and he'd rather martyr himself than to make your life harder.

But now, you say don't even know if you WANT him back.. you just know you wanted him AVAILABLE... and now he's ignoring you. It's your EGO that's hurt.. how could he SAY all those things about still wanting you.. but start ignoring you the very next day, and for the three weeks since?! I'd say it's because he's very, very hurt -- and since nothing's changed and he doesn't know WHEN he'll "get it together" enough for you... why just keep making the same mistake over and over?

^yea damnit!

*claps* what the fish said.

Oh.. also.. erm... dating 6 weeks and you suddenly blow up and ask, "What's your plan?".. Really? I mean, I understand that you want/need a man who has it "together" and will bring positive influence into your life. I GET it. But YOU dated a (jobless) guy for 6 weeks, and think it's time to put the pressure on him, give him the "Don't be a loser, be a stand-up responsible person.. get your life straightened out, dude.. like me!" speech? He hadn't CHANGED.. he was what he was when you first got together.. but suddenly that's not good enough? Pisces will resist people MAKING them change, fight it tooth and nail. We are infinitely changeable and mutable.. we go through countless metamorphosis is our lives.. but NEVER because someone is forcing us to.. ONLY because something INSIDE has compelled us to.

Do you have a bit of control-freak tendencies? Seems like you might. That can actually be a kind of blessing with Pisces men.. they LIKE strong women... but not to the point of being controlled and told they aren't good enough. they like you to be steady and in control of YOURSELF. A bit aggressive and outgoing and fearless, very attractive. Too much of a bitch and what-have-you-done-for-ME-lately will make him... well.. you know. *swish* *swish*

Also.. yes it's true that Sags and Pisces don't tend to make very good matches.. they're just too different. Very good for friendship, but the relationships are generally filled with unnecessary trouble and strife, very difficult. Especially in your 20's.

Neefer, thank you so much for understanding my position, unlike some others.

If I thought I genuinely hurt his feelings, I feel terrible. He was so good to me (and I was to him) and I hate the thought of abandoning him at his lowest...which is what I realized the very next day. We had a great r/s otherwise. His "situation" hadn't interfered too much until this point.

However, he wouldn't even let me explain. Aren't people allowed to make mistakes? I'm not perfect and told him right from the get-go, "I am impulsive emotionally and will say sh*t I don't mean but I will always realize my mistake." I'm a Sag girl for Christ's sake!

I didn't think it would be so final like this...in fact, he said he didn't want it to be. Then look what he did! I haven't stopped crying in 3 weeks. I'm a Sag girl - I move on easy, but I can't even think of anyone else.

My head says forget it but my heart knows I want to be with him. I don't give a sh*t if he has nothing to offer me...I know how impractical that sounds. My friends keep telling me he's moved on and couldn't care less about me. If I thought he was thinking of me at all, I'd call him right now. Since I have no feedback, I don't know what to do. He could either be totally over it or still thinking about it - I DON'T KNOW...which is why I don't know if I will pursue it. I already threw caution to the wind and tried callin for 2 days straight (and I definitely don't feel bad about it). Then I stopped.

oh totally missed that. fire sign dramatics.

*rolls eyes*

Neefer, quite the opposite. He treated me very well and I made sure he knew I appreciated it and I returned the favor. As a Sag, I'm independent and don't take advantage or "gold dig".

Yes I am definitely a control freak but I never tried to control him. It was just when the car was done, it kind of brought things to a screeching halt.

I don't like that he wouldn't even have a conversation with me. How he could read my txts and listen to my vms and not respond at all is kind of mean. Even if he didn't want to talk to me, he could've said that. After all, it was HIM that wanted to keep the door open.

circular logic? and you're getting a masters?

at the end of the day, he doesn't have a job, he doesn't have a car, when asked what he wants to be when he grows up, it varies from fireman to "president of the world." HOW you ended it sucked but clearly, you shouldn't have gotten entrenched to begin with.

as nefer said, this is all about your ego. you rejected him and he dares reject you back? if he had come pleading before you changed your mind, you'd be stomping him into the dust.

you're both better off.

And the thing I have to live with is knowing I may have given up a great guy because I jumped the gun. Hey Cali, I totally see where you're coming from but, I feel bad enough.

But how can I rectify it? I can't call again. Is there a chance that if I truly accept him for who he is I can get him back?

Cali, I honestly didn't know what I had till I lost it. I could've held in there but I jumped the gun. People are allowed to make mistakes. I don't know if I called now if he'd answer but I'm too scared to try.

Oh and let me just say something else. He has a history of "psycho exes". Is that typical of Pisces because they ignore?

The point is you broke trust. That's a tricky thing to get back from anyone once it's shattered.

I understand the others who posted. *I* even was shaking my head and thinking.. wow.. really? But sometimes my Nice overpowers my Not Nice and I can do that little thing where I put myself in another's shoes. I instinctively understand the Pisces pov more than the Sag one, of course. But I think I DO understand SOME of your position here... but my news is not good, I'm afraid. Yes, we understand making mistakes, saying something you regret, all of that. But we DON'T like investing too much of our hearts into a relationship where someone already showed she will bail AND that she will immediately regret it. I mean, that feels like drama, and drives us craaaaaaaaazy.

Normally, I'm not one to tell a woman to initiate contact with a man unless he is clearly and verbally HER MAN and they have a close, loving relationship. However.. if you keep ignoring this (and yes, it IS definitely YOUR screw up here!).. he's not going to reconsider his position. You will HAVE to swallow your (gargantuan) Sag pride and reach out to him.. a letter or email, preferably (we read and re-read things over and over to FEEL the effects) telling him that you made a mistake and realize that you have something special together. Apologize sincerely (and for pete's sake, do not say BUT!) "I'm sorry I did X, BUT..." .. just NO. Don't justify or make excuses for your behavior, don't blame him for YOU suddenly being unable to deal with the way he is and the details of his life (or "lack" thereof.)

If he still doesn't answer, then you have your answer right there. Move on. If it's meant to be, he'll show up again someday. But in the meantime, YOU DO YOU. get back into your life and your fun and your friends.. keep yourself busy and happy and fulfilled.

Venus, thank you. That's what I need to know. He broke my trust too though. He was do crazy about me and then he just slammed the door. Any input how to gain trust back?

why do you want him back?

you're weird.

Nefer, thank you so so so much.

I definitely thought about sending a letter. In fact, I paid $ 2 to get his address a few weeks ago (I didn't know the # of the house). I wrote letter after letter and threw it out. My friends said do not contact him again and it would make me look pathetic.

I'm not scared he won't answer. I'm more scared he will get the letter and laugh. I'm scared what we had meant more to me than it did to him...although the kid was crazy about me. He was extremely romantic and sweet. I just don't want to look pathetic. I already threw my dignity to the wind enough, my friends tell me. However, my guy feeling is that he's kind of seeing if I reach out again. But everyone says I did enough already and he wouldn't hear me out.

One more thing. The first day he ignored me, I legitimately thought something was wrong. My friends said "if you don't hear from him in the morning, start calling around bc something is wrong". So I sent his best friend a msg on fb. I took a gamble knowing his bff never checks his fb. Well I still don't think he's gotten it bc the profile is public and he's had no activity in over a month. Should I hold off? Maybe his friend will answer me and apologize for the late reply and maybe I can strike up a convo with him?

Also, as gently as possible... it seems to me that you actually ARE concerned with his jobless/carless state.. you've mentioned several times in your posts how YOU'VE got things pretty together, making and doing and having success in your life.. and how in comparison HE doesn't.

But now you keep telling yourself (and us) that you "don't care" about those things.. but you do. And you SHOULD, there's NO shame in that.. It doesn't make you a bitch, so don't feel guilty about having certain standards... just don't get involved with guys who DON'T meet those standards.. you'll only end up resentful and continue to inadvertently belittle them.

So why THIS guy, this Pisces.. after only 6 weeks dating.. after YOU ended it, but now HE won't let you "take it back"? There are a LOT of guys out there who would meet (or exceed) your standards, you know. And plenty of them are attractive, intelligent, great guys.. and really and willing to do a relationship with a great "together" gal like you. Don't let your impulsiveness and hurt ego draw you back into making a big mistake with the Pisces guy. If he wasn't right for you.. this past few weeks isn't making him any more right for you!

Peace out Days!!

And Cali, we had an awesome r/s for 6 weeks. Not even an argument. Just really cliche googley eyed romance. And then i messed up.

Also, he wasn't always "like this". Like you said, I think it's a transitional period.

Posted by Days22

Posted by nybeauty02
Venus, thank you. That's what I need to know. He broke my trust too though. He was do crazy about me and then he just slammed the door. Any input how to gain trust back?

wow. I think I hate you already.

So I can imagine how he feels.

Peace.

click to expand

my thoughts exactly. i mean wtf!? she breaks up with him and he's the one who walked out? he's the jackass?

Thanks Nefer. You gave me a lot to think about. It was the best 6 weeks of my life though, so it's hard to let go of. The old battle of heart v. Mind.

STOP LISTENING TO YOUR FRIENDS!

FFS, girl... REALLY?!?! How is it that THEY are the epitome of how you SHOULD behave in relationships? I can almost guarantee THEY are single or in fucked up relationships themselves... it's very COMMON. What is UNCOMMON is finding and cultivating GOOD relationships.. and you can't DO that listening to your gf's telling you what to do about a guy and how PATHETIC you'll look. No, don't CHASE him, that IS pathetic. But when YOU fuck up, put on your Big Girl panties and be a Big Girl, see? Big diff.

AND DO NOT "TALK" TO HIS BFF! NO NO NO!
Girl, that's friggin' PSYCHO. He will NOT appreciate that. Like WHOA. Put down the binoculars and step outta the shrubbery type crazy.

And as for Pisces and their "psycho exes".. it's not cuz Pisces ignores them.. it's cuz we attract teh crazies. lol

Well I sent his friend a msg a long time ago. But I don't even think he got it yet.

What does treetrunk up mean? I already sent txts apologizing when I tried gettin on touch with him after the break up. It's not too much if I do it again in a letter?

treetrunk lol.. you've got your profanity filter on... treetrunk is what replaces when I let that rather unladylike F word come out *wink*

Oh okay. Lol and trust me, I'm crazy (I'm a fire sign) but I'm not psycho - I'd never stalk him or eff up his car like the others.

It's just if he genuinely has moved on and doesn't want to hear from me, I don't want to bother him. It's hard to gauge a situation when you have no feedback.

Yes I tried calling for 2 days right after. I don't feel bad about calling - I cared - he meant alot to me - I fought to show how sorry I was. Then I stopped.

Truthfully, NY.. I don't think you two are a great match.. I'm not trying to be mean. But you're clearly in different places in your lives... your 6 weeks was great, fabulous, wonderful... but honey, it's SIX WEEKS... and already, there's BIG issues with you guys being so very different from each other AND with where you are in your lives.

You may never get the closure you seek. What could he say anyway, really? Besides, closure is just that - CLOSURE. It CLOSES the door. Wouldn't you rather leave that door OPEN... so if things change in the future, there might be a chance for you two?

He may not answer you... Pisces can be incredibly stubborn LOL (And people say we have no backbones, weak and easily-led.. HA!) So be prepared for that. If he's DONE.. there is nothing you can do. You know that. Then you'll just get on with your life, and suddenly realize someday that it doesn't hurt as much as it used to, and eventually you'll realize you went a whole day or week without thinking of him. It WILL get better.. if you let it.

I completely understand.

I wake up everyday thinking he's going to call and say he's sorry he ignored me but he needed space. Actually the very last txt I sent said "I'm sorry I bothered you. I see now you want to be left alone. If you want to call, call. Take care." so yeah I left the door open.

I guess I'll just move on. Thanks for all the help. I wish I knew if he is totally done but I just have to assume he is.

Do Pisces come back on their own if they made a mistake? Because I have the feeling that he won't come back on his own since I messed up.

And ya know what? If he's afraid I'm a psycho, he'll see I'm not (if he hasn't already). I mean really, how psycho can someone be that leaves you alone?

PiscesPrincess, thanks - yeah I'm going to leave him alone.

Do Pisces notice when people move on? Is my silence the best shot I got of him coming back? Is 3 weeks too long already? Do Pisces move on easily? Because he always told me he has a hard time getting over people he's "hung up on" (not sexual relationships. He said in situations like that, he's in and out).

My instincts tell me he's a runner anyway. Just things he's said and things I've picked up on. So if that's the case, it's truly better if we don't get back together. I don't want to have to worry about when it will happen again.

when people say, "i'm not a psycho" or "i'm not going to go psycho," all i can seem to think is, "boy, what a psycho!"

i mean, why bring it up? no one insinuated you were nuts. sooooo...you must be nuts.

i also think you made the right move for you and where your justification may have been shitty, you hastened the inevitable. what i take offense with is arrogantly and unjustifiably blaming him for not returning your calls. fuck you tears! you started it. 😛

K thanks Cali!

you're more than welcome...psycho

😄

That ignore button is great!

Cali's harsh but speaks her truth. I've acquired quite a taste for her ballsy and in your face honesty! Most of us are saying the same things, to varying degrees. Including ME.. I mean, I'm being nice about it... but the truth is, I see this more as your hurt EGO talking cuz he's ignoring you after you walked away. You're not even SURE you want him back, but his silence has got you twisted. But we chicks do NOT like feeling like we were soo disposable, forgettable, easily ignored. At least, *I* sure don't. How insulting! How infuriating! How DARE he tell me to call if I change my mind - then ignore me?! ME?! but I'm friggin' AWESOMENESS SQUARED... he dates losers and psychos... how COULD he act like I'm not the best thing that ever happened to him?! He SAID he didn't want it to be over! Hell yeah, I'd be pissed. Well, my EGO would be. Cuz my ego is one huge, heinous bitch - and she likes attention, and HATES to lose!

Well I'm not psycho LOL. I was just being honest and saying I am a crazy girl, but not psychotic.

Nefer, to be honest, alot of people said the same ish to me (about my ego). Any suggestions how to let go of that?

^and her ego is a psycho. straight loon!

and awwh, i'm on ignore? that has to be a record. WOO!

my work here is done 😉

I do think if he got his life together, we could have something great. But that's not wanting HIM, that's wanting the fantasy that doesn't exist - I get that.

And he does have a job. It's just not legal. I didn't want to mention that before...

Sag girls are born with ego... unlike any other sign I've ever known. You guys are BORN knowing you're the bomb-diggity, natural confidence and presence. It's fascinating to me, because I had to earn and create my own self-confidence.. I've had many, many Sag friends.. including my BFF of over 20 long years!

I've got an Aries Venus.. so I'm both blessed and handicapped by my bitch of an ego. The only thing that helped mine - I'm a Pisces and not a Fire sign LOL... and age and maturity helped my ego become a PART of me, instead of a hungry beast on a chain who kept breaking loose and wreaking havoc LOL

"I do think IF HE GOT HIS LIFE TOGETHER, we could have something great. But that's not wanting HIM, that's wanting the fantasy that doesn't exist - I get that." (Consider this space me pasting this 100x over and over!)

And meh.. I'm all "whatevs" on the "illegal" job... he's NOT in the same place as you in life.. he's got some MAJOR things to fix, work out, improve.. and that's on HIM to do. It's not PERSONAL that he's not right for you.. so stop (letting your EGO) TAKE it personally. It's not a failure to take the good times and the good things you've learned and move on. It's not a black mark on YOU that he seems to realize you're so incompatible and so is refusing to answer you. It's a +1 to him for letting his ego go enough to do what's best for both of you.

C'mon.. you're a Sag! Where's that FIRE?! Get on gettin' on, girl! If he comes back around in the future, THEN take some time to reconsider how you're feeling and what you want at that time!

lmao!

and he's a drug dealer—

the bitch is crazy.

OUT!

Dunno if he's a drug dealer, Cali.. that IS the first thing that comes to mind when one says "illegal" eh? That or working in a chop shop lol And I'm sure she didn't mention it earlier, because she didn't want to be judged, and didn't want people going all DUMP THE LOSER without hearing anything else...

But the truth is, NY.. if he IS involved in shady shit.. is that REALLY the kind of man you need in your life? Plus, if he's a drug dealer, he's crappy at it, if he ain't even got a nice ride LOL C'mon Dag girl... you know better than this. Don't let your ego twist you up like this... you were seeing things clearly 3 weeks ago, when you realized he is not adding enough value to your life, that you have reasonable needs and expectations that he is unable to fulfill currently.