Im back....

oh i dont know...
just life is boring......
Im sarcastically angry at life right now.
but in all else im fine really....
Im stuck in a Rut,....
but i dont mind it too mutch ill get out of it soon...
ehh,.....watcha gonna do right?

ive also almost completely become a recluse shutting off my family and freinds...
and started taking Zoloft for depression.

:/

tell me do you think its damaging not to show anyone love since you were a kid?
i think i might end up a cold aloof dwelling depressed old man if i dont find somone ...... not like urgent tomorrow,...
but within a couple of years ....

to release Years and years of hatred jealousy lonilyness and love...
not all at once but you get the picture.

@haffo

21 Years5,000+ Posts

What do you want to do Mike?

ohhh man you know wat... you need a board... an you need to get out on a wave an just feel the rush of it breakn down on you... you need to feel alive again!!

Isnt it obvois?
I said it all right there.

i feel like this guy...

http://static.flickr.com/8/10180188_b56ef7d76b.jpg

(copy paste to your browser)

@haffo

21 Years5,000+ Posts

" ive also almost completely become a recluse shutting off my family and freinds..."

Why?

Mike you there?

haha naa sorry hun itz only me! ohhh but poor mike aye... really down n out yeaa

I think its just because ive been sick...

and realising i have little freinds.

and i went on my email and my myspace and none left me any essages or cemments and its been weeks,
i just felt forgotten.

likeif youd died no1 wulda given a toss... ohhh hun well i think ur a legde!! haha cheer up babe!! itz not the end... wat have u been sick wit??

I have was diagnosed last monday with: Sever Eczema , Moderate to severe Depression , moderate Insomnia,
and chronic headaches and fatuige.

Eczema is a wierd condition that in its early stages looks like Ringworm, than progresses
to large very itchy painful lesions and enflamed rashes that almost always starts in the joints
of your arms and cheeks and ears of the face, it hurts it oozes it itches it swells and it lasts for weeks or months if left untreated,
a Doctor diagnosed me with ringworm gave me strong antibiotics and vaginal inti-fungal cream,
wich also works on ringworm infections. Well.....a long story short i suffered for weeks more after already having it for a month and a half, it got WORSE redder brighter itchier more swollen, and spreading...i finally went to my dermotologist,
and he said ohhh no that isnt ringworm its classic
"Coin" Exczema, wich looks identical to ringorm,but affects joints and face...
he was quick to prescribe me the right medicine and a powerful expensive cream and drying solution,
and depression medication, so today its only days after first using the cream drying solution and pills,
and the eczema is almost completely gone no itchy no oozing, were it used to be red is dead skin and just rubs off with no pain,..
its a miracle,....haha well im glad thats gone but now,
my freind dosent visit me,.....and the whole email and myspace hting.....

because ive been in bed almost 2 months,.....im pale as paper,
skinny....only 135 and im 5-11 thats skinny for me i guess,
and i feel alone....
and kinda lost.

but today ive been thinking to myself reassuring things will be better and i can start playing music again,
i wrote,.....2 choruses and added great little parts to already exsisting music to my freinds parts,
on guitar even though i play bass.

and i never could write songs with lyrics,
before,......the extreme's of being in bed with red s h i t ,
all over me and barely being able to move my arms helped me,
i just thought i have nothing i feel like dying,
last resort, cheezy as it seems,
try and write a song chorus or somthing and i just came out....
and ive written one more after that......

so its a learning experiience aswell as a releif im getting better,
and theres people to talk to here at the DXP,
crowd.

best regards
-mike

OMIGAAWD!!! holy shyyt mayt i think ud better pinch yourself...i think u just went to hell... how on earth did u get through that!!— i know ur still getin better but hahaha holy at least uv seen sum improvement... man i think i wulda overdosed ages ago!! lol crap ohhh u poor babe!! im really sorry to hear that you went thru all of that!!

hay but hun id really love to hear wat uv been workin on lyricz ways... u play bass?? thatz steazy as!! haha i ant got no musical ability watsoever... haha so cum on bassplayer give me a couple of ur lines...

haha,

(Music)
Hold,............On your young",....Its and indifferent world"...Until your song is Sung",
(music)
Hold,............On your young",....Its a dizzing maze, So let the Sun Set your Stage". ahho"
(music)

I can write plenty more variations to fit,
when we record it.
I just have to remember the desperate feeling and moment in time i was in,
and i can pull words from the feeling.

hahaha thatz so steazy!! haha well gd luck to you hun!! haha im off 2 hava showa hava d 1 qT!!

okay.

Mike

Don't wait them come to you. You go to them.

Thnx haffo,
Thats what i did, and almost always have to do... :-/
I just wish i didnt have to sink to that level...
Its Al-right though,...

Ill live...,😉

-mike

@Melusine

20 Years500+ Posts

Hey Mike, welcome back!It's good to see you posting again...

My mood right now : "DEPRESSED"..."ANGRY"..."PISSED OFF"..."belligerent"..."paranoid"...I can go on and on...

Just thank your lucky stars I don't have any real powers or I'd totally contemplate blowing up the whole world right now! Muhahaha hahaha....

Hmm,maybe I shouldn't have said that..you never know who's watching...

*hut hut hut hut* the troops are positioned out side... ready on my signal... you know wat to do guys... lol

haha
yes mam'

Haffo takes out SWAT mask: "I want an ice cream!!!!".

@Kupo