Would you ever contact any of your exs years later?

So my ex contacted me. We've been broken up for over 5yrs. We both live overseas but in different countries. When we first broke up he wanted to remain friends but honestly I don't know how people can do that so had to tell him to stop contacting me but said if anything bad happened I would always be there for him. He is a Sag with a Gemini moon, I'm a gemini with Aqua moon. He pretty much msgd me to tell me his life is crap, his business has gone downhill and he's going back home... maybe he thought I lived back there, not sure. I don't know why anyone would contact their ex to say how crap their life is. Like really I want my exs to think i'm doing fantastic without them although he's really my only main ex, only long term relationship. Also I think maybe he just broke up with his gf. Would any of you do this? I think it just makes you more down.

Yes I did, to ask why he done what he'd done. I was reflecting on the past and how it had affected my decisions (at that time)

I remember my ex before I left saying you'll never met someone like me. Like so manipulative he was right before I bounced.

Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
I remember my ex before I left saying you'll never met someone like me. Like so manipulative he was right before I bounced.

lol usually the whole reason your leaving is cause you don't want to meet someone else like them anyway.

I stay friends with all my exes -- I am weird like that, I value time I spent with a person and feel the need to have a contact, even if it's once in a blue moon.

Posted by LibraLovesHim
Yes I did, to ask why he done what he'd done. I was reflecting on the past and how it had affected my decisions (at that time)

I actually contacted him maybe 3yrs ago after he wrote me a birthday msg for this reason. Sometimes you need a little closure. Back then he apologized for the way he treated me but then said he thought we stayed together too long. Our relationship was very volatile to say the least. One of those toxic relationships you stay in cause there is so much chemistry. I haven't actually seen him since we broke up, only once to get my stuff back. I avoid my ex's like the plague.

Posted by aquapiscescusp
I stay friends with all my exes -- I am weird like that, I value time I spent with a person and feel the need to have a contact, even if it's once in a blue moon.

Don't you find by talking to them you realize why you liked them in the first place and it makes it harder to move on? The way I get over people is generally to cold turkey cut them out of my life.

Posted by MissM

Posted by aquapiscescusp
I stay friends with all my exes -- I am weird like that, I value time I spent with a person and feel the need to have a contact, even if it's once in a blue moon.

Don't you find by talking to them you realize why you liked them in the first place and it makes it harder to move on? The way I get over people is generally to cold turkey cut them out of my life.

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Actually no... lol

I realize I did the right thing by talking to them.

strange, I know

its a curiosity more than anything

Posted by MissM

Posted by LibraLovesHim
Yes I did, to ask why he done what he'd done. I was reflecting on the past and how it had affected my decisions (at that time)

I actually contacted him maybe 3yrs ago after he wrote me a birthday msg for this reason. Sometimes you need a little closure. Back then he apologized for the way he treated me but then said he thought we stayed together too long. Our relationship was very volatile to say the least. One of those toxic relationships you stay in cause there is so much chemistry. I haven't actually seen him since we broke up, only once to get my stuff back. I avoid my ex's like the plague.

click to expand

Yeah I get that....I moved countries to get away from that one LOL

Posted by LibraLovesHim

Posted by MissM

Posted by LibraLovesHim
Yes I did, to ask why he done what he'd done. I was reflecting on the past and how it had affected my decisions (at that time)

I actually contacted him maybe 3yrs ago after he wrote me a birthday msg for this reason. Sometimes you need a little closure. Back then he apologized for the way he treated me but then said he thought we stayed together too long. Our relationship was very volatile to say the least. One of those toxic relationships you stay in cause there is so much chemistry. I haven't actually seen him since we broke up, only once to get my stuff back. I avoid my ex's like the plague.

Yeah I get that....I moved countries to get away from that one LOL

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you moved countries to get away from someone? that's drastic, why would anyone have that much power over you?

Yeah I bumped into him and he told me he was married and with a kid now. Good congratulations.

Posted by aquapiscescusp

Posted by LibraLovesHim

Posted by MissM

Posted by LibraLovesHim
Yes I did, to ask why he done what he'd done. I was reflecting on the past and how it had affected my decisions (at that time)

I actually contacted him maybe 3yrs ago after he wrote me a birthday msg for this reason. Sometimes you need a little closure. Back then he apologized for the way he treated me but then said he thought we stayed together too long. Our relationship was very volatile to say the least. One of those toxic relationships you stay in cause there is so much chemistry. I haven't actually seen him since we broke up, only once to get my stuff back. I avoid my ex's like the plague.

Yeah I get that....I moved countries to get away from that one LOL

you moved countries to get away from someone? that's drastic, why would anyone have that much power over you?

click to expand

I was 19 years old and heartbroken. The opportunity came up and I took it.

Posted by MissM
So my ex contacted me. We've been broken up for over 5yrs. We both live overseas but in different countries. When we first broke up he wanted to remain friends but honestly I don't know how people can do that so had to tell him to stop contacting me but said if anything bad happened I would always be there for him. He is a Sag with a Gemini moon, I'm a gemini with Aqua moon. He pretty much msgd me to tell me his life is crap, his business has gone downhill and he's going back home... maybe he thought I lived back there, not sure. I don't know why anyone would contact their ex to say how crap their life is. Like really I want my exs to think i'm doing fantastic without them although he's really my only main ex, only long term relationship. Also I think maybe he just broke up with his gf. Would any of you do this? I think it just makes you more down.

Hell no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have been married twice, lived with a guy for five years, and have had my share of boyfriends; like you I say, "What the hell reason would I need to remain friends w/them? So they'll know who I am seeing? Who I broke up with? My trials and tribulations? Add my name/pic on their FB and cell address book?" HELL NO!

Saggies are like that; esp men. You don't have to ask them; they will automatically tell you, "I am friends with all my ex girlfriends/ex wife(ves); as long as it's okay with you I am okay w/that because I believe in staying friends with them; no matter if they did me wrong or not, I will ALWAYS remain friends w/them". Uh huh!

You have to remember that Saggy men do not like to be IGNORED; well, sorry, this Piscean STRONG woman doesn't need to ask you for a glass of water or a piece of bread. Enough said. 🤗 cyber hugs!

Love,

Eva

PS: I DECIDE who my friends will be (and when to use the BLOCK button); as when I broke up w/my ex Saggy bf I blocked him on FB and my cell phone.

i think it depends. depends on what kind of relationship you had and how it ended. i have had 3 serious relationships that ended, they lasted 2, 4 and 1 years respectively.

the first one, though it didnt end well it was for the better and after a little time i think we both realized it. so we keep up on the events of each others life (through social media) and occasionally exchange messages... the 2nd relationship.. i wouldnt mind keeping in touch, really wish him the best but it was a rough break up for him (i left) so by the time he got over it he started hating me for all the pain i put him through... well yea i did but at the same time for 4 years ive been trying to motivate him to get off his mom's couch and do something and he is still there on his mom's couch (mind you we are in our late 20s)... but i think he is a good person and wish him well hence id keep in touch if he wanted to.

the last one... i secretly want him to get in touch w me bcuz i never really got the chance to truly express how i feel about him. i broke up w him, he was extremelly self centered and manipulative and nasty and just disgusting person... after a year with the person there is nothing good i have to say. its sad. he contacted me about a year after i broke up w him. kept sending messages (he knew i read them but i never responded). It started w how r u, i missed u, then oh why u not talking to me, then to oh i still have feelings for u never stopped loving u, to why the fuck r u not responding, to oh we broke up because of the circumstance (no ass hole i broke up w u cuz you are a horrible person and even a worse partner), to just going off at me how undeserving and crazy i am. i never responded to any of it. i knew that getting in to it w him, i wouldnt win. he would twist and turn every thing id say into oh she is angry she still loves me.... and i dont. i just cant believe someone like that exists and also cant believe myself for being manipulated into being w him. shockingly i havent heard from him for a year and a half now. i guess my silence was painful and he felt rejected again. so ill keep my strategy

so here it is! it depends!