5 Reasons Why Introverted Relationships Work _3

Everyone is familiar with the age-old saying that “opposites attract.” There is a certain catchiness to it that lures in those who are looking for relationship advice. But it may not always be true.

When it comes to the introverts and extroverts, a lot of relationship advice pushes the dynamic duo, bringing the introvert out of their shell and toning down the extrovert. But what if the opposite were true? What if the combination, for some, was actually more detrimental?
As an introvert madly in love with an introvert, I can strongly vouch for why the introverted relationship works so well. Here are five main reasons why I would encourage an introvert looking for love to not rule out the idea that opposites don’t always attract.

1. Balanced needs for refueling. An introvert feels stronger and happier when they are allowed to have their time alone just to think while extroverts require others to provide emotional fuel for them. In an introverted relationship, neither party requires such a heavy responsibility from their partner. Without the need for one to fuel another, they can both individually reach their level of comfort and bring that peace to the relationship.

2. Understanding. While an extrovert can certainly cater to an introvert’s needs, they can never fully understand them. It is a wonderful gift to be involved with a partner who knows why you need to hide from the world occasionally without trying to change it or negotiate with it.

3. Varying intellectual conversations. Of course extroverts are just as capable of intelligent conversations, but with two introverts who enjoy reading and pondering over socializing, the range of deep conversations is much greater and ever-changing. Not to mention, the surprise turns and twists that can occur in a conversation when given the chance to think apart.

4. Every evening in. To most extroverts, this sounds like a negative thing but many introverts would be thrilled to spend more time at home on their couch or at least away from larger crowds or entertaining. When your partner is also an introvert, this is the norm. There is no need to put on an extroverted face when you just want to crash in the corner or ask your partner to forgo their evening of fun when you just aren’t feeling it.

5. Solitude combined with togetherness. Few things are as amazing to an introvert as sitting quietly with their thoughts or a good book. But when paired with sharing this amazing experience with your partner, it becomes pure bliss. The need to escape and be separate to recuperate never requires you to be fully alone, allowing a much deeper bond to form.

While there are positives and negatives to every relationship, the introvert/extrovert combination that many feel they must seek is not set in stone. There are ample benefits to two introverts falling in love. So at the next social gathering, try looking at the wallflower with the book. You may find that opposites do not necessarily attrac

Source: http://www.jennifersoldner.com/2014/05/5-reasons-why-introverted-relationships.html

Posted by tiziani
"Of course extroverts are just as capable of intelligent conversations..."


the level of smarm in that statement, alone.


As an introvert in a relationship with another introvert, ironically I was hoping for more insight than this beauty pageant approach to the subject.

There is definitely a level of defensive posturing, as though the writer was too preoccupied with perceived arguments against her stance and felt the need to "beat them to the punch," and address them. I did appreciate the list (and can relate) and simple read solely based on the fact that I have yet to read or hear the perspective that introverted/introverted relationships are as valid a combination as any. Then again, I never sought it out, only stumbling upon this as I was reading more about my INFJ personality type while searching material to post on Damanta's personality thread. Perhaps the writer was frustrated while writing, finally getting the chip off her shoulder?

My Leo friend was very a-social and even had social anxiety that went beyond my own. I recall the moment during his military Christmas party where I asked if he could get me something to drink because I was thirsty. He got really stressed and asked that I just wait to drink after we left the party because he didn't want to walk across the hall, to the eating area. I sat there, the only woman without something to drink when his comrad asked incredulously why I didn't have a refreshment and got up to get one for me. Of course, I completely understood where Leo was coming from because I shared similar nerves. I thought to myself: "I don't think I could be in a relationship with another introvert. Who will I rely on if we are both under the blanket fort?"

That's when I met my boyfriend, and he is an introvert, but also has the amazing quality of truly marching to the beat of his own drum. When the gym lost the yoga video I wanted to do with him, and there was a girl in the recreational already doing Zumba, and he knew I loved Zumba and said: "Hey, since the yoga video is lost, why not let us just do Zumba instead?" That's when I knew I found my match. People looked in on us through the glass doors and windows, and he didn't care. He enjoyed it with me, and that gives me courage.