Attachment styles in relationships

What is yours? How did it play out with different attachment style people than yours? Share anything and everything you can>>

Posted by Antiphates

Probably dismissive.

I started paying attention to attachment style s just recently. I must be fearful , it matches my actions most of the times. I watched one of her videos, when she says about fearful, they were "trained" to be good and do good, in order to be rewarded emotionally, so they are expecting the same in adulthood. Then she goes saying if they don't get it that way they get upset and pushy. Check mark

Posted by LittleStar

I’m 💯 fearful avoidant.

I also am getting better at actually communicating!

Fearfuls don't have communication problems, they sometimes take over some of anxious characteristics, such as over communicating, volatility. it's confusion dismissives bring, most of the time they are trained to seek emotional validation by doing everything in a right way

mixture of dismissive/fear

Posted by virgoOPPP

mixture of dismissive/fear

What type of attachment style s do you attract mostly??

There's also that need of distance fearfuls seek in order to remain "interested" . I'm still in the process of figuring this out. Someone too demanding is overwhelming, while someone too closed off, dismissive brings chaos. Fearfuls want to feel needed in a distance and their vulnerability accepted. Whenever someone takes and never gives, also doesn't provide security in return, that's when fear of rejection comes in play and FAs express some of anxious preoccupied habits.

Posted by pisceanloves

Posted by virgoOPPP

mixture of dismissive/fear

What type of attachment style s do you attract mostly??

There's also that need of distance fearfuls seek in order to remain "interested" . I'm still in the process of figuring this out. Someone too demanding is overwhelming, while someone too closed off, dismissive brings chaos. Fearfuls want to feel needed in a distance and their vulnerability accepted. Whenever someone takes and never gives, also doesn't provide security in return, that's when fear of rejection comes in play and FAs express some of anxious preoccupied habits.

click to expand

dismissives

Shit, that's very interesting.

Though I don't really relate to those two attachment style s. I just did this test : https://psychologytoday.tests.psychtests.com/bin/transfer

And it says :

"Avoidance of Closeness 30

Whether it involves emotional expression or developing a deep intimate bond, you're the type of person who is very at ease getting close to a partner. You are also comfortable relying on your partner when necessary, as well has having him/her dependent upon you in times of need."

fearful avoidant, definitely have anxious attachment. we avoid in order protect ourselves from the fear of relationships. I am somewhat uncomfortable getting close to others. I want emotionally close relationships, but I find it difficult to completely trust others, or to depend on them. I sometimes worry that I will be hurt if I allow myself to become too close to other people. facts

Anxious/ avoidant.....make a guess

I am single forever

Posted by LittleStar

Posted by pisceanloves

Posted by LittleStar

I’m 💯 fearful avoidant.

I also am getting better at actually communicating!

Fearfuls don't have communication problems, they sometimes take over some of anxious characteristics, such as over communicating, volatility. it's confusion dismissives bring, most of the time they are trained to seek emotional validation by doing everything in a right way

Lmao @ attachment style s beside secure not having communication problems. 🙄

click to expand

I don't lol

But maybe I'm the only one. Usually I hold back a lot and if the situation does not improve that's when I go full honesty mode, I say everything that's on my mind. Sometimes it might take pages or a good portion of time to put everything in words but nevertheless I say it. The outcome? Never positive lol

Posted by leooox

fearful avoidant, definitely have anxious attachment. we avoid in order protect ourselves from the fear of relationships. I am somewhat uncomfortable getting close to others. I want emotionally close relationships, but I find it difficult to completely trust others, or to depend on them. I sometimes worry that I will be hurt if I allow myself to become too close to other people. facts

FAs need to be in control of the dynamics. In my situation the guy was dismissive and confused me a lot, I tried to give it a time but confusion and ambiguity is something fearfuls can not tolerate too long. So I pushed. The time when I opened up completely and poured my thoughts was the time he cut me off.

There's 2 things FAs need and only 2.

1. Consistency

2. Emotional Security

They don't need too much of intimacy, somewhat trying to keep balance, not too crazy mode when you can't keep your hands off but not too detached when you don't communicate at all and literally abandon them. Fear of abandonment plays a major role, either way they leave.

Maybe that's the main reason I lose interest when a guy shows too much interest and literally won't leave me alone, I feel suffocated, but if they leave me completely alone then the fear of rejection creeps, followed by inadequacy. And trying to gain control over the situation, in all reality they just need reassurance and the guy can have all his freedom. Usually they are misunderstood with anxious preoccupied style s

Posted by Pathos

Anxious/ avoidant.....make a guess

I am single forever

I feel you lol

I don't mesh well with secure types, as I find them boring and others bring mess