Confused Pisces in love with Cancer Man

I have been on an online relationship with a Cancer man. Firstly he doesn't believe on an online relationship, says it is a relationship with a computer or phone, not person to person. He has a point, however, a bond has been made. Anyway we were supposed to meet this year during the summer period, however, due to circumstances beyond my control, I may not be able to do so, as I have to obtain a Visa to visit the country and may have to delay the visit to further down the year or next, as I need to get a job, etc. in order to secure a Visa. Now he has pulled away, says we are to put a pause on things. Then suddenly he got upset because he had a disagreement with one of my fb friends, totally unrelated to us. This person, a woman, I haven't spoken with in a while, but because of the post, and as I said, this had nothing to do with him and I, he is claiming that I should spend my time with my friends and he is done. It is like my friends when they show any attention to me he gets upset, yet claims he doesn't care, so why make an issue of it in the first place. Well he said some harsh words, threatend to cut me off, delete fb, etc. then he wished me well, and said goodbye, then later comes on to say he is going to sleep. He hasn't deleted anything as yet. What is all this about? Am I to take it that he is really gone? But why say he's going to sleep after a while. He confuses the life out of me. The thing is I love this man dearly and will really hate to lose him or our the friendship. I do want to meet him but I think he is uncertain I will get the visa to visit. I am unclear with the mixed messages or actions. Does anyone have an opinion or insight as to the mind of a Cancer man?

Firstly he doesn't believe on an online relationship, says it is a relationship with a computer or phone

That's all there is to it. I didn't even read past that line right there.



okay, okay, I'll go back and read the rest.

Okay. I read the rest and stick to what I wrote. The bond is on your end.

I get what he is saying. A relationship on-line isn't real. It isn't real until you meet in person. Sure, you can be friends with somone on line, but as far as a relationship, it isn't real until you can see, touch, smell, feel each other.

What happens so often in on-line relationships is people build up the fantasy of the other person. Your imagination can make this person someone they're not because you can get all caught up in what could be and all the possibilities. What we miss out on is the reality.

Besides, what could even be the future possibility of this relationship if you have to go to all that trouble to even get into his country. Be realistic. The odds of this turning into something more is pretty slim.

Don't put a lot of stock into someone you've never met. Moreso, don't put all your eggs into that one basket.

Seems like perhaps he really isn't who he says he is and this little hissy fit of his, well, it's a way to break it off before you meet up.

So, what's he got to hide? You have to be smart and look at it from that perspective.


Those are just my personal thoughts. I personally wouldn't be interested in an LDR anyway for those reasons.

Yes and this is the same man who said that he will never fall in love with someone online without meeting them.. then after some months of communication says he has in fact fallen in love with me. I even asked him when he suggested the pause if his feelings for me has changed and he says no... Like I said it's very confusing to me.

Oh, and the hissy fits and moodiness of a cancer man? The push away when something doesn't go the way they want? The fragile emotions and ego? Contanstly having to reassure them? Dealing with their insecurity? Not interested. Rode that ride and got the t-shirt.

Granted, not all cancer men are like that. I like cancers, just not unevolved ones.

Posted by nightowlintt
Yes and this is the same man who said that he will never fall in love with someone online without meeting them.. then after some months of communication says he has in fact fallen in love with me. I even asked him when he suggested the pause if his feelings for me has changed and he says no... Like I said it's very confusing to me.

My opinion. Red flag.

I mean, come on. How can you fall in love with someone you've never met? He may have fallen for the fantasy of you, but it's not the real you.

Remember that.

Posted by nightowlintt
I have been on an online relationship with a Cancer man. Firstly he doesn't believe on an online relationship, says it is a relationship with a computer or phone, not person to person. He has a point, however, a bond has been made. Anyway we were supposed to meet this year during the summer period, however, due to circumstances beyond my control, I may not be able to do so, as I have to obtain a Visa to visit the country and may have to delay the visit to further down the year or next, as I need to get a job, etc. in order to secure a Visa. Now he has pulled away, says we are to put a pause on things. Then suddenly he got upset because he had a disagreement with one of my fb friends, totally unrelated to us. This person, a woman, I haven't spoken with in a while, but because of the post, and as I said, this had nothing to do with him and I, he is claiming that I should spend my time with my friends and he is done. It is like my friends when they show any attention to me he gets upset, yet claims he doesn't care, so why make an issue of it in the first place. Well he said some harsh words, threatend to cut me off, delete fb, etc. then he wished me well, and said goodbye, then later comes on to say he is going to sleep. He hasn't deleted anything as yet. What is all this about? Am I to take it that he is really gone? But why say he's going to sleep after a while. He confuses the life out of me. The thing is I love this man dearly and will really hate to lose him or our the friendship. I do want to meet him but I think he is uncertain I will get the visa to visit. I am unclear with the mixed messages or actions. Does anyone have an opinion or insight as to the mind of a Cancer man?

This is EXACTLY what happened to me. I didn't mind the distance and all that but he did. Well guess what, I'm gonna make it simple. All you need to do is love him unconditionally and make sure he knows that, and then maybe fight him in it a bit, after a month or two of this, stop. Stop talking to him. Let him freak out and cry, let him (and make sure) he thinks it's because he doesn't want to move forward because it's online. He'll be yours forever.

IT WILL WORK. You just have to make it happen. It's very hard and painful getting him to agree. VERY. But worth it and it does happen. Anyone may disagree but my CANCER is a TRIPLE cancer

Please listen to me. Seriously I know how it feels. I too am a pisces. You're in y exact shoes. Literally I can't express it more, we're in identical plans excep I've advanced. I got him. It's really not that hard.

Thank you SuperMissMan, you have given me hope, because for me I have to meet him, I need to know to myself if there is a chance or not. I don't want to go through the rest of my life having to wonder if it could have been a success or not. I will do as you suggested with keeping away. I know it is going to be a difficult one for me. In fact when had gotten tense earlier on and I don't contact him, he does and asks if I am hiding or I am rather quiet, etc.

After this last incident well I will not contact him and even thinking of not being on Facebook for a bit as well. He knows very well of my feelings for him as well. I shall see how this plays out.

Truecap I do thank you as well for your candid comments. I appreciate everyone's input.