How important is reputation?

Could you date someone who had a horrible reputation?

Yes, our "reps" are made up of 50% bullshxt from haters, while the other 50% is from people who really DO know you, & ARE right in what they're saying about you negatively.

My definition of a "reputation" is: How the average person "defines" you. And yes, I get that people will think they've got you all figured out even if they've never met you or no barely anything about you.

But from my perspective, my OWN reputation is very important to me. I like to know that if I'm putting out gold, that gold is what everybody is seeing in return, not silver or plastic. And since my own reputation means alot to me, I also expect for the person I'm with to have a genuinely good rep too.

I get that some people "change" or that not everything being said about a particular person is always true, BUT I can honestly say that I don't think I could date someone who had a very bad reputation, whether it be for cheating, violence, crime, deception, being fake, etc. I'd always remind myself that if 50,000 people are seeing the SAME things in you then NO they're not all imagining things; they're probably right & it's probably YOU that's in denial.

It's even harder to date someone who has a bad rep even after they've clearly changed or strayed away from whatever life style got them the bad rep to begin with. This kind of situation is different, but even then I'd have to see proof that change really occured & I'd have to have good reason to believe that 50,000 people are imagining things.

It's embarrassing to think the world of someone when yet the whole outside world thinks your partner is a piece of shxt!

I like you K 🙂

I think reputation (when it is negative things) is 100% bullshit. Real friends wouldnt be saying stuff about you to other people so anything negative will have been spoken by people you are not friendly with or who have crossed you! I couldnt care less what someones apparent rep is. I like to make my own decisions about people and have good intuition.

I have a reputation for being a bitch lol, people are actually shocked when they meet me by how pleasant I am. The people who say I am a bitch are the people who have got on the wrong side of me and they are the ones who rant and rave the bullshit!

Posted by libra sun
I think reputation (when it is negative things) is 100% bullshit. Real friends wouldnt be saying stuff about you to other people so anything negative will have been spoken by people you are not friendly with or who have crossed you! I couldnt care less what someones apparent rep is. I like to make my own decisions about people and have good intuition.

I have a reputation for being a bitch lol, people are actually shocked when they meet me by how pleasant I am. The people who say I am a bitch are the people who have got on the wrong side of me and they are the ones who rant and rave the bullshit!

On 1 hand, I get what you're saying. However, it doesn't make sense to say that only those who don't know you can notice negative things about you. Hell if anything, those who know you the BEST & the longest are the ones who can see ALL of you (the good AND the bad). I agree that if someone is truly your friend that they wouldn't be spreading lots of rumors about you in the 1st place, but not everything negative that comes out of a person's mouth makes them a hater. Keeping it real about someone means being honest about BOTH the good & the bad.